Alright ya'll, it's taken me so long to get this chapter done and posted! I kid you not, it took me several days to get this one down. I don't know if you guys will like it, but I hope you do!

Chapter 8: Scrambled Thoughts

Wan Lee does return to guide me to the dining room. When we get there, he excuses himself with a formal bow toward Zuko. Servants enter and exit the room as they set dishes on the table. I stare my plate down as Zuko watches me quietly. Wan Lee, of all the places, why did you choose to seat me to the right of Zuko? Eventually, the churning in my stomach becomes too much. I drag my eyes to meet his unwavering gaze. It's not nearly as bad as I had expected. There's no judgement, nor a demand for answers coming from him. I see not a semblance of anger in his eyes. More than anything, his gaze keeps me steady... He is searching. I'm not sure what for, but I want to know what he finds if he does. He opens his mouth to speak and my heart thumps loudly in response.

"I'm up!" Sokka exclaims loudly, "Where's the meat?"

Zuko looks away toward Sokka with a sigh. Toph groans as her head hangs. Her foot rises to stomp on the floor and Sokka runs straight into the wall that emerges.

"Oof-"

He falls face first before the table when she lowers the wall. Suki bends down to help him up as he groans. Irritated, he stalks toward Toph grumbling incoherently as his hands wave wildly in front of his face. Sitting beside Zuko, Suki drags Sokka to the seat next to her. Unfazed, Toph reaches for some bread, "Sugarqueen, why are you waking us up at these ungodly hours?"

Closest to the entrance, Katara stands with her hand on her hip. Exasperation covers her face as she walks forward to take a seat next to me. She tugs on Toph's robes to have her sit down on the seat next to her. Toph sighs as she flops on the chair, chewing loudly on the bread she holds.

"First of all, I only had to wake you," Katara pauses a beat before continuing gently, "I thought we should have breakfast together and talk,"

I feel five pairs of eyes watching me as she finishes her sentence. I look around the table and zero in on the first thing I notice, "Oh, fire flakes! I didn't know they were a breakfast food!"

"They're not." Zuko replies unamused, "Sokka asked for them last night."

"And I can't believe they remembered either! Zuko, you need to give them a raise!" Sokka exclaims, mouth full of fire flakes.

Disgusted, Katara shakes her head before tearing her eyes away from him to look at me. My body tenses with discomfort. Under the table, my hands tremble. Softly, Katara rests her hand over mine. I make no move to remove myself from her grasp. In the background, Sokka is panting heavily as he attempts to cool down his mouth while stuffing more fire flakes in it. As much as the physical contact makes me uncomfortable; Katara's hand is warm and that in itself is comforting. Her gaze is filled with concern and so, without further thought, my body relaxes. Why am I acting like this? Katara, who I love-

I look away from her afraid she'll see my thoughts if I don't. From the corner of my eye, I see her sigh. She lets go of my hand and takes my bowl to fill it up with rice and some vegetables. I narrow my eyes as she sets down my bowl and she moves on to serve Toph before standing to help everyone else with the rice. The night on Ember Island flashes in my memory. I pick at rice. Of all the things I have to worry about, that is what my head is going to? To Katara, I've been a friend: a sweet little guy. I'm a goofy kid. A goofy kid that killed the Fire Lord. Yeah, because being a killer is such an admirable thing. Still, is it bad that my heart still clings to the hope she feels the same way I feel about her. Despite knowing that I've done such a horrible thing, knowing that I had another choice, I want to love her. I want to be able to love her without feeling like I'm doing something wrong. Katara, who I told revenge wasn't the answer...Katara, who spared the man that killed her mother...how can I ask-how can I demand any answers from her when I couldn't stick to my own principles?

Selfless duty call you to sacrifice your own spiritual needs and do whatever it takes to protect the world. Yanchen's words ring in my ears. They were the final push I needed to kill him. Interestingly enough, in that moment, I wasn't thinking of the morality of my actions, but rather of the man himself. How can someone not have even an ounce of empathy, nor human decency, not even a bit of shame? Ozai was man that had no respect for the dead, nor for the living. Possibly, what tears me apart the most is that as much as I regret killing him. I'm glad he's dead.

"Aang!"

I look up at Suki, then Sokka. He nods across the table to Katara. I stare disoriented as she rests a hand lightly on my shoulder. A shiver runs across my arm to my fingertips. Gently, her hand follows the path of my tattoo and stops at my clenched fist. I take a staggered breath and drop my chopsticks. I rest my head on the back of my chair in hopes to gather my thoughts.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

I don't look at her, but I can feel her glare on the side of my face. Her hand lets go of mine. It's cold now. "Aang, you're not."

I close my eyes briefly before looking at her directly, "Katara-"

"Aang, you've been staring at your food for half an hour." She tell me gently, "Talk to me."

Concern shines through her vibrant eyes. I look away and catch Suki watching along with everyone else. Zuko coughs, "Do you want us to leave?"

An uncomfortable silence falls over us. Toph snorts.

"Sparky, I know you're socially awkward, but I didn't realize you were this bad."

Zuko scowls. I smile genuinely at that. Beside me, Katara stares at me expectantly. I consider what to say before opting for a half-truth, "I got lost in thought. I'm a little tired and my back isn't helping."

She eyes me suspiciously, but lets it go with the promise of a healing session. Thankful for that much, I begin eating slowly because it seems my back does hurt when I move my arm.

Zuko

Ember Island, in the middle of summer, is heaven. The cool breeze of the ocean mixed the usual heat of the Fire Nation creates the perfect combination for laying in the sand and playing on the beach. A woman smiles fondly at a little boy running wildly on the edge of the shore. Little feet stomp on soaked sand and splash against the waves. I stand watching until the little boy runs after a turtle-crab, holding it protectively in his arms. Suddenly, a wave crashes on the shore sending the small boy under to the sea. A man standing in the distance with the woman runs into the water after the boy. I watch as he dives in and faster than I would imagine someone could, he secures the boy in his arms. When they make it to the shore, the woman stands with a towel. Mouth set in a deep scowl, the man rips the towel from the woman's hands. Curiously, the man gently-almost tenderly-wraps the towel around boy heaving in his arms.

The boy curls into the man hiccupping looking up at the man with wide timid eyes and finally, with his back to the woman, the man lets the scowl drop and concern fills his golden eyes.

That was the dream I had this morning. I don't know if it's an actual memory or wishful dreaming, maybe even a nightmare. All I know is the Ozai in that dream, is a far cry from the one in reality. And though I strived my whole life thus far for the love of my father, I don't want it. It's no longer a possibility in real life (it hasn't been an option ever), nor do I want it to be even in a dream, even in the past. I chose to let go of my father, the moment I joined Aang and I don't regret it for a second. I know as far as the world is concerned, he needed to be stopped. Ozai being out of power is the best for the world. But the one thing keeping me together as far as my father is concerned is that I made the decision knowing I never had his love and I never would. I gave him the chance and he refused to listen. He left his demise as an only choice. Still, this dream replays in my head. It messes with what I believe true. Should one of those be false, everything might crumble under me. Should I be wrong about one thing, what else have I been wrong about?

I look at Aang. Slowly, he lifts food to his mouth and it's obvious to anyone that knows him, he's somewhere far away from this table. Is it surprising? No, not really. I was around the same age when my father gave me the scar on my face and banished me. I was filled with anger and hurt. I can only imagine how he's feeling. Or maybe not, maybe I don't have the right to say that, considering I was the one to push him to not only kill a man, but to kill my father.

I hope you guys enjoyed this one!Next chapter shouldn't take nearly as long, but I suppose time will tell. Hehe. As always, I'm so thankful for all your kind reviews and please, feel free to leave some more! Next chapter, our lovely gaang's timeout is over and we must get back to business!

Quote of the Chapter

Time stops for no one as she cares not for money, fame, or mercy.

-Pyrenees

Ps. I forgot to mention. For Zuko's dream, I actually got inspiration from the comics. Or rather, I guess I kind of twisted info from the comic. That being said, don't get attached to anything from the comics because while I may use stuff from there, I'm not overly attached to them or Korra. Thank you :)