I wasn't going to split this chapter but it kept getting longer and longer and my school schedule doesn't allow me to work on this as often as I would like. There's May pt.2 and June still to be finished.

May 3rd 2010

As the last few rays of sunlight colored the hospital room Lilly watched the rise and fall of her sister's chest on the bed while trying to process the past few hours. There was a baby in a borrowed car seat right next to her, the man they'd knocked out hours earlier had been arrested after they had called in some favors and her partner was just entering the room again, having left a couple hours prior to shower and to stop by the office.

"How is she?"

"Woke up from surgery about an hour ago, they managed to stop all the minor bleedings and fix the broken rib but she's exhausted."

Scotty walked over to her chair and leaned against the wall next to her. "That's good."

"She wants to go straight from here to rehab. Wants to get her life together…"

"That is great."

"I have a niece Scotty." She stated, almost dumbfounded at the little girl clutching her finger with the world's cutest little death grip.

"Is everything ok with her too?"

"She was mostly just hungry and with a diaper rash, they showed me how to give her a bottle correctly, she must have been starving. The nurses handed me her discharge papers a few minutes before you came in." Lilly told him almost robotically.

"Are you ok Lil?"

"She wants me to take her."

"The baby?"

"She won't leave this place for a week or so and rehab will take more than a month, the baby has nobody else but me." She rambled off in slight panic.

"When are you taking her home?" Scotty asked her, not even pausing to consider that Lilly Rush might have some reservations about suddenly becoming a temporary single mom.

"I don't know if I can do this Scotty…" Her voice cracked.

"But you want to, right?"

She turned to him, tears threatening to fall from her eyes "More than anything." Scotty could only envelop her in a hug that she promptly returned with her free arm.

"You already love her don't you?" He asked, peering over her shoulder to best inspect the littlest Rush in the room.

"She's so perfect! She squirmed a little half an hour ago and I tried to calm her. She hasn't let go of my finger since. I'd have to pry it off her Scotty!"

"She takes after her Auntie." He kindly told her, adding a pat on the shoulder for additional affection.

"I can't let her have our childhood, look how innocent she looks. How am I going to do this? I don't know the first thing about taking care of an infant!" Masie's eyes fluttered open and she let out a tiny cry. Lilly instinctively took the baby from the car seat and cradled her to her chest, promptly ending the baby's fussing.

"You seem to know just enough. And she likes you already." Scotty replied, if a bit taken aback by how right seeing Lilly with her niece seemed. Sure they'd had to handle the occasional child at work and Lilly was usually the textbook definition of perfect with them, but non-verbal, fussy children required a different set of skills that he had never seen her exercise.

"I don't have any stuff for her or know how to bathe her and what if she runs a fever-"

"Calm down Lil, I can help you with all this stuff." The overthinking he knew how to handle. Because while he knew from his family that the logistics of raising a child can always be solved in some way, Lilly didn't fully know that the most crucial part she already had down: the unconditional commitment to the child. The rest he could help her figure out as she went. "My nephew just turned one in March, my brother probably has some clothes and things that don't fit him anymore. I can go pick up some diapers and formula for you and if she's with you long enough I'm pretty good at assembling baby furniture unlike Mike. You are not alone ok?"

"You are the best partner I could have ever asked for." She told him, gratitude bleeding from her voice.

"What is her name Lil? I believe we haven't been properly introduced." He joked.

"Masie. Masie Elena Rush. Her birthday is October 29th and she is almost seven months old."

Scotty kneeled down in front of Lilly to be nearer to the baby's eye level and began to try to fish something out of his jacket's pocket. "Well there Miss Masie, I am officially declaring myself your Uncle Scotty. I will help out your Auntie Lil take care of you and when you are older I'll take you to baseball games with my nephews and I'll teach you to throw a mean curveball and I will spoil you rotten. In fact, I have already started…" He pulled a small plush kitten from his jacket and watched the little girl hugging it tightly as soon as he placed it near to her tiny arms. "Figured you might be a cat lady like your Auntie here. I was right. His name is Símon but you can change it if you want." To the introduction of Símon Masie gave a giggle followed by some unintelligible babble. Her eyes opened the widest they'd seen since finding her and Scotty marveled at the shade he could clearly recognize.

"You got blue eyes like Auntie Lil don't you? Sky blue? Azul como el cielo? Heh cielito?"

"That's what you are calling her?"

"For now at least." Scotty shrugged off before continuing to coo at the baby. "We are going to have so much fun, yes we are cielito!" Masie giggled again at the use of her new nickname. "See? She loves it!" He lightly gloated.

"Thank you." She said, slight relief coloring her voice.

"I'm going to call my brother and run down to the store. Call when visiting hours end and you want me to come pick you two up, I'll drive you home and give you all the baby tutorials you'll ever need ok?"

"I will."

"See yo-"

"Scotty?" She called after him just as he was turning to leave them.

"Yeah?"

"I don't need to tell you I turned down the Feds, do I?" She smiled awkwardly. Scotty would have guessed it the moment she said she was taking a baby home with her.

"I'm a detective too, I figured it out." He grinned cockily before disappearing out of the door for a quick grocery run.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

May 14th 2023

"Moooooooom we are going to be late!" Masie stomped her way down the stairs with a cap and gown trailing behind her. She'd been wearing the specially picked dark blue dress with colorful florals and a new pair of red converse for over an hour, fidgeting and threatening to change outfits despite having her heart set on the current choice. The cats had been steering clear from her, sensing her nerves, and her flashcards with several versions of her speech were mushy from hand sweat.

"We don't have to leave for another hour." Christina reminded her, despite having a small, personal motivation to arrive earlier.

"But what if there's traffic? Or a bridge falls? MOOOOM!" Masie whined.

"You are just nervous, everything will be fine."

"I gotta practice my speech!" She argued.

"Can't you practice for us?" Christina asked.

"NO!" Masie yelled. Lilly had braced her ears from the second the question left her sister's lips.

"Why?"

"She wants it to be a surprise." Lilly explained.

"Hurgh I'll go rehearse in my room again!" Masie stomped her way back up the stairs already pulling her speech cards from her dress pocket.

"She's valedictorian." Christina stated as she plopped down on the couch.

"It's only middle school Chris, she'll top this eventually." Lilly sat herself next to her sister, bracing herself for another talk about how much Christina had missed, namely how she'd gone from having an infant daughter to having a young teenager.

"Still…"

"I know."

"Her father would have been so giddy about this, I just know it…" Christina confessed.

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine… I've accepted that passing a long time ago… I guess I sometimes wish he could have gotten a second chance like I did…" She said through a sudden knot in the pit of her stomach.

"I wonder what it would have been like if mom had straightened out like you did… like how would she be around a grandchild? How would Ellen Rush be as a grandmother? I try to picture it, but I can't, I can barely see her as a mom anymore, not after all I've gone through with Mase…" Lilly said.

"I get what you mean, I'm not even comfortable calling myself her mother without adding a "biological" ahead of it and I've probably done more for her in these few months than mom did for the both of us our whole lives!"

"Mase doesn't need her, she has enough moms to make up for her, biological, adoptive, it doesn't matter, it's enough to go around." Lilly stated to lift the depressing tone of the conversation.

"Enough of every family member to go around!" Christina chuckled. "Has she ever been missing anyone? Seems like you found her a stand-in for all possible roles!" At the "has she ever been missing anyone" question Lilly's mind flashed to a day several years prior and her mind could no longer compute outside stimuli.

"Lil?" Christina asked a few times, not getting an answer for at least a solid minute.

March 10th, 2017

Carpooling. They had taken it up for some time even then. On Tuesdays Masie had figure skating practice until late in the afternoon, late enough for them to pick her up after work. The two of them were sitting in the car parked right outside the skating rink waiting for Masie and, knowing what her daughter's topic of conversation would most likely be and having gone over that same topic in her head several times for the past few days, Lilly had finally summoned the strength to bring it up.

"She has a father-daughter dance coming up." She stated, not needing to clarify who "she" was.

"Ok." Scotty replied before quickly realizing the glaring issue with that statement. "Oh."

"Yeah."

"How is that-"

"She asked at school if she really needed a dad and they said she needs a parent to take her." Lilly replied rubbing her forehead in frustration.

"Are you taking her?"

"I considered it, but she already has so much trouble fitting in I don't want her to feel even more the odd one out being the only one with a mom there."

"But you don't want her to feel left out by not going." Scotty stated as his mind filled in the blanks of what was not so subtly being asked of him.

"I know it's a silly little thing but I don't want to deny her that."

"So can I take your daughter out or what?" Scotty asked her, not bothering to even think about it before agreeing.

"You'd be ok with that?"

"Who else is she gonna take? Vera? Pffft I'm a much better dancer!" He joked as they spotted Masie through the window of the building and began to leave the car to walk the 10 steps to the door.

"You sure?" Lilly asked one last time.

Scotty smiled in earnest and gave her shoulder a pat. "She deserves it, I'm happy to do this Lil."

The two opened the door and Masie launched herself into Lilly's arms. "I landed that axel I told you about Mom! I did it!" Masie proclaimed loudly with her arms hanging around her mother's neck.

"Good job Mase, I knew you could!" Lilly rubbed her back and gave her a kiss on the cheek before letting go so she could greet her favorite Uncle.

"Uncle Scotty!" Masie gave him a quick hug and he tussled her hair just a little, enough to accidentally pull her beanie off her head.

"Watch that pretty little head of yours cielito, we wouldn't want you to catch a cold, now would we?"

"It was you who took it off!" Masie protested as Scotty placed the beanie back on her head and playfully pulled it down enough to cover her eyes as he knelt to be eye-level with her.

"I know this won't be as exciting as your jump today, but I may have a little proposal for you kid."

"What?" Masie asked, her now wool-freed eyes wide in anticipation.

"Well a little birdy told me you have a father daughter dance coming up soon…"

"Yeah…" Masie looked at the ground in mild embarrassment, that specific kind only children seem to feel when too much attention is placed on them.

"And you really want to go…"

"Yes…"

"And we've already told you family is who you love and not necessarily just who is related to you." Scotty said while briefly making eye-contact with Lilly, as he had, unsurprisingly, been present for several discussions of the meaning of family in years prior.

"Huh huh…" She nodded.

"And that families come in all shapes and sizes and some little girls have a mommy and a daddy, some two mommies, some two daddies and some just one daddy or one mommy-"

"Like mine!"

Scotty chuckled. "Yes like yours." He briefly looked at Lilly to spot the subtle joy she always showed whenever Masie stated their family situation with such pride and happiness. "So, if you'd like, could I go to the dance with you?"

Masie squealed in delight at the idea but still felt the need to make sure it was okay with her parent. "Can he mommy?" She asked almost guilty at how much she liked the idea of taking Uncle Scotty instead of her mother.

"Of course." Lilly nodded, adding a wink to reassure her child even further.

"Yes, Uncle Scotty you can be my date!" Masie hugged him with more strength than he ever thought a seven-year-old could possess.

"I'll pick her up Saturday, that ok with you ma'am?" Scotty asked Lilly playfully before seeing her mouth a silent "Thank you".

"Lil!" Christina asked once more.

"What?" Lilly replied startled.

"Are you okay? You went into the zone or something?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, just thinking about something…Let's load the car, it won't kill us to be there a little early." She conceded before calling Masie downstairs and retrieving everyone's jackets.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Can't you go any faster?" Masie groaned from the backseat of the car.

"There's just a bit of traffic but we got time sweetie." Lilly told her, glancing at her watch to make sure there was still almost a full hour until the ceremony was to begin.

"You said you were going to use the sirens if needed!"

"When?" Lilly asked, feeling extremely confused.

"A couple years ago…" Masie mumbled. "… but today requires it way more!"

"Mase we'll get there ahead of time anyway, why the rush?" Christina tried to reason with her.

"I still need to show Gabe the finished speech to see what he thinks!"

"And you'll have time!"

"But what if I need to change something?" Masie cried.

"You won't." Lilly tried to reassure.

"I still think you should consider the sirens…" Masie mumbled as she crossed her arms in defeat.

December 16th 2019

"I'm here what do you need?" Lilly burst in the office on a Saturday afternoon with a ten-year-old Masie trailing behind her in one of her nicer figure skating outfits.

"Hey there Tonya Harding!" Vera joked as he lightly tugged at one of Masie's pigtails.

"You're still not funny Uncle Nick!" She replied as her hands flew to her hair to try to fix any newly inflicted damage.

"Back off her for today Nicky our girl has a competition to win." Scotty came to greet them, giving Masie a pat on the back followed by a high-five.

"Mrs. Leone was finally tracked down this morning and we have her in custody. We can't keep her much longer and she refuses to talk to anyone but you, she remembers you from when you handled her boy's case back in 2000? Anthony, 20-something murdered in Fishtown?" Stillman asked Lilly as he led her closer to the interview room. They were smack in the middle of a case and Mrs. Leone was a key witness they'd been trying to track down for several days.

"Yes, I remember her."

"We have to interview her now Lil."

Lilly felt her heart drop to her stomach. Of course she was going to have to interview a witness at the worst possible time. Masie had been talking about the damn competition for days and she'd already missed part of her child's piano recital a few months prior; there was no way she could go do an interview with a child so dependent on her without feeling like the worst mother in the world. "But I have to-" She began to speak before Scotty who had clearly been paying attention to the conversation while simultaneously listening to Masie explain the intricacies of her skating routine.

"Hey Mase! How about I drive you to your competition while your Ma handles something real quick? You left one of your Best of Billy Joel CDs in my car, you could take it back." Scotty offered, looking at Lilly from the corner of his eye to make sure she'd be okay with the proposition. He knew her turn to skate wouldn't be for a couple more hours, seeing as he had been invited to go see it.

"But you don't know how to do show makeup!" Masie protested. Lilly didn't really know either, she usually just copied what the other moms were doing. Scotty could charm his way into getting some help, right?

"You are right… so if you wanted to wear the hot pink glitter this time, I wouldn't know you aren't supposed to use that one because it doesn't match any of your outfits…" He knew she had no outfits that matched with hot pink, he'd listened to his favorite niece complain about Lilly getting her mostly blue and purple outfits instead of a hot pink one that she refused to accept was only sold in teen sizes for a solid week, of course Scotty would know the value of a stupid tin of face glitter in negotiation with a 10 year-old girl.

"Will you go there as soon as you are done Mommy?" Masie asked, mostly on board with the change of plans but still needing some reassurance.

"I'll use the sirens if I have to sweetheart. I promise." Lilly hugged her goodbye and Stillman opened the interview door open for her. She didn't end up using the sirens to make it on time but she made some calls to get out of a parking ticket she received from rushing inside the building and completely forgetting to put some change in the meter first.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Christina and definitely had a thing for each other. Since their arrival Lilly had been sitting alone in the spot Masie had told her to sit in, after studying the acoustics of the first 8 rows and concluding the best vision/sound ratio was in the fourth row. had coincidentally had some trouble with the camera and had asked Christina if she didn't happen to have some experience with recording equipment (which she did due to some stuff she'd done at work and had told him about at the dance) and off they'd gone, to coyly flirt over the video camera designated for filming the ceremony. Masie seemed okay with her birth mother's sudden change in placement, seeing as the camera spot was fairly good for sound and obviously included a clear view of the stage as well. So that left Lilly on her own, the single mom she'd gotten used to being, sitting among other sets of expectant parents and with a clear view of the Valens clan on the first row of the other side of the aisle. They'd waved at her and Allie had even come by to say hello to her and chat some. She scanned her friend's face for any clue of her knowing what had recently transpired between her and Scotty, but she didn't find any. The Valens family didn't know she'd slept with her partner and best friend before shattering his heart for reasons she didn't want to admit even to herself. A relationship with Scotty would be to risky, right? I can't gamble on something so important, he's practically Masie's adoptive father!... Crap! He is already like her father and I'm her mother… that doesn't mean anything, it's not like parents have to be romantically involved. After what I did to him we may as well be more like a divorced couple. He's been civil at work but keeping a distance… a distance I don't know if it's for my sake or his own… and now I'm going to watch my daughter do her speech alone… Why did I do such a dumb thing? What came over me? Why did I run him off when all he wanted-

"Excuse me is this seat taken?" A voice asked her. She knew that voice too damn well.

Dammit!

"I don't think it is, no." She replied against every fiber of her being.

"Why didn't I lie?" She thought as a suit clad Scotty Valens plopped himself down in the seat right next to hers with only five minutes left to the beginning of Masie's speech.

Up next: Masie's long-awaited speech, more flashbacks and Lilly's inner turmoil.