Okay. So this wasn't bad, but I'm highly insulted they didn't have Tugger sing it. Once again, however, Robbie Fairchild absolutely KILLED it; he's amazing.
Also id like to just acknowledge Cassandra's facial expressions in this one cause they are PRICELESS.
Ahem. Moving on. Enjoy, my lovely jellicles!
I could see a flash of light through my eyelids. Blinking groggily, I sat up. My head kind of hurt.
"Where's Old Deuteronomy?" I heard Munkustrap demand.
I looked around. As far as I could see, Old Deuteronomy was nowhere to be found.
There was a scurry of feet. I turned to see Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, guilty hiding canisters of catnip behind their backs.
"Where is she?" Munkustrap snarled.
The twins remained in guilty silence for a moment.
"We don't know." Mungojerrie finally said.
A striped tabby I didn't know the name of hissed, knocking the calico tom to the floor.
"Where is she?!" he snapped, holding threatening claws above him. Mungojerrie cowered.
"Look, it was only a bit of fun!" Rumpleteazer defended her brother.
"We didn't know they were going to take Old Deut!" Mungojerrie added fearfully.
Munkustrap made a half motion to scratch him, but stopped, stepping back with a resigned look.
A gold striped queen with a red collar stepped forward. "There must be something we can do."
"We can't just magic him back!" Cassandra said disdainfully.
"Yes, we can!" the words flew out of my mouth as an idea blossomed In my head. Everyone turned to look at me.
I faltered a little under the attention. "Yes, we can." I repeated, a little quieter. Munkustrap leaned forward, head tilted. He was clearly intrigued by this proposition.
I turned to look at Mistoffelees, crouched on a fallen wood plank. "You're a magician." I pointed out with a smile.
Mistoffelees shrank into his own skin as everyone shifted their attention to him. "What?"
Munkustrap raised his eyebrows. "It's not a bad idea," he conceded, looking at the tuxedo tom hopefully. "It's worth a try."
"Really, I can't." Mistoffelees said, a little sharper.
"You could try." I encouraged.
Mistoffelees looked frightened. Nevertheless, he took his hat from one of the brown tabby twins, who had been toying with it. Taking a deep breath, he climbed into the stage, putting his hat on carefully.
"Crossed paws." I heard him mutter
Munkustrap rushed on with him. "Can we have a spotlight?"
"Please don't, just let me do this-"
"And a drumroll, please!"
Both were provided. I sat down on the edge of the stage to watch.
Munkustrap put his paw on the nervous tom's shoulder, pushing him forward. He began to sing,
"The greatest magicians
Have something to learn
From Mr. Mistoffelees
Conjuring turn!"
The striped queen that had spoken earlier drummer on one of the lights. Mistoffelees tried to make a run for it, but Munkustrap grabbed him before he could get far. He continued,
"And we all say
Oh, well, I never
Was there ever
A cat so clever
As magical Mr. Mistoffelees."
Mistoffelees faced the crowd. His eyes flicked briefly to me before he began to sing timidly, hat held anxiously in his paws.
"I am quiet, I'm small, I'm black
From my ears to the tip of my tail
I can creep through the tiniest crack
I can walk on the narrowest rail
I can pick any card from the pack-"
He pulled some cards out of his hat.
"Im equally cunning with dice-"
He pulled a large red die out of his hat once again.
"I'm always deceiving you into believing you're only hunting for mice…" he trailed off, realizing he'd probably gotten that wrong, and tossed the dice away. Out of the corner of my eye I could spot Munkustrap giving him a concerned look.
"I can play any trick with a cork-"
He tossed one behind his back.
"Or a spoon and a bit of fish paste-"
He pulled both out of his hat and passed it to the striped queen, who had been crouched beside him.
"When you look for a knife or a fork
And you think that it's merely been misplaced
You've seen it one moment
But then it is gone
You'll find it next week
Laying out on the lawn!"
He did a clever trick of pulling the fork out of his sleeve and placing it in his hat, then pulling it out of his coat. I smiled. The striped queen looked thrilled, but Munkustrap looked like he was getting impatient. Mistoffelees crept over to a large basket in the corner, where Old Deuteronomy had sat during Gus' performance, and held his wand over it. He continued to sing.
"Oh, well, I never
Was there ever
A cat so clever
As magical Mr Mistoffelees…"
I crept up to the basket on all fours.
Mistoffelees appeared to concentrate, closed his eyes, and jabbed at the basket-!
Everyone looked inside eagerly.
It was empty.
I glanced around. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Cassandra was not impressed.
"You can do this." Munkustrap whispered to a mortified Mistoffelees. I backed up, giving him more space to do his trick. Mistoffelees continued his song, considerably quieter.
"My manner is vague and aloof
You would think there was nobody shyer
But my voice has been heard from the roof
While I was curled up by the fire
And I've sometimes been heard by the fire
While I was about on the roof
At least they all heard that somebody purred
Which is incontestable proof!"
He sounded more confident now.
"Of my singular magical powers
And I've known the family to call
Me in from the garden for hours!
While I was asleep in the hall!
And not long ago, this phenomenal cat
Produced seven kittens right out of a hat!"
He lifted his hat, face twisted in concentration. Instead of kittens, however, three mice perched on his head.
Everyone, even usually apathetic Cassandra, looked shocked at this.
The mice began to whisper
"Mr Mistoffelees?"
"My hero!"
Mistoffelees turned his head to look at a mouse who had climbed onto his shoulder, and the other two fell. Mistoffelees shrugged with a sheepish smile and began to sing again,
"And we all say
Oh, well, I never
Was there ever-"
Everyone began to join in.
"A cat so clever
As magical Mr Mistoffelees!"
Mistoffelees approached the basket with renewed confidence. He screwed up his face in concentration and jabbed at the basket again, more viciously this time.
Nothing.
I frowned a little, worried.
Mistoffelees turned around, repeating his verse again, with the rest of us joining in,
"Oh, well, I never
Was there ever
A cat so clever
As magical Mr Mistoffelees…"
I sat beside him. Mistoffelees closed his eyes. "Please." he whispered to himself, tail curling, and jabbed once more with his wand, keeping his eyes closed.
When he opened them, he gave a small, hopeless noise and slumped. I saw Tugger wince.
I looked at Mistoffelees. There was no way he was incapable of doing this. I softly sang,
"Oh, well, I never
Was there ever
A cat so clever
As magical Mr Mistoffelees…"
Mistoffelees looked up, his expression bordering on hope.
"And we all say…" Munkustrap added
Everyone slowly joined in the chorus again.
Mistoffelees slowly approached the basket again, everyone encouraging him. I sat down next to him, my fur brushing his.
He ran his paw over the shiny fabric in the basket, staring at his wand as if begging it to work. Holding it over the basket, he leaned back, and gave a final jab at the basket.
Once again, there was nothing.
Mistoffelees' ears fell. I felt mine do the same.
Until we heard a familiar voice behind us.
"Oh, well, I never
Was there ever-"
Everyone whipped around to see Old Deuteronomy, a calm smile on her wrinkled face.
"A cat so clever
As magical Mr Mistoffelees…"
Everyone stared at Mistoffelees, who was starting to grin, in a moment of shocked silence.
Then they began to sing as we all rushed up to the old leader's side, nuzzling her fur.
"Oh, well, I never
Was there ever
A cat so clever
As magical Mr Mistoffelees!"
As everyone sang, I faced Mistoffelees with a bright smile. We were very close; almost nose to nose.
"You did it." I whispered.
"I did." he whispered back, hat in paws.
I rubbed my cheek against his. He returned the affectionate gesture, a smile growing on his face once again. Then, he stepped away from me and lifted from the stage, cards shooting from his hat. I watched, delighted, as he landed on the other side of the stage, and joined the others in their joyful dance as he did all sorts of magic tricks; conjuring roses from thin air, creating instruments from nothing… It was quite a show.
Mistoffelees hurried over to me and put his paws on my shoulder, guiding my gaze to the ceiling as he conjured more roses. I knew by his warm gaze that these were for me.
He joined me in a small dance; taking my paw and gracefully spinning me around. We sang together,
"Oh, well I never
Was there ever
A cat so clever-"
"As you!" I added cheekily. Mistoffelees grinned. "As me!" he went along with it and gracefully picked me up, eliciting a giggle of delight.
We hurried to the large doors of the theater together, standing on the steps. I leaned towards him, and he did the same, taking off his hat. He was so close… I closed my eyes as his lips touched mine for a split, too short second. He smiled shyly, and so did I.
Munkustrap gracefully leapt over, causing both of us to look at him.
"I give you! The magical!
The marvelous!
Mr Mistoffelees!" he cried.
Mistoffelees grinned, took my paw, and twirled me. When I looked again, he was gone.
I turned around in confusion before looking at the stage, a huge smile on my face.
Mistoffelees reappeared in a plume of smoke in front of Old Deuteronomy, and bowed, twirling his hat. He lightly touched noses with her, and everyone yowled their approval.
I suddenly sensed that someone else was there. Turning around, I could see through the half open doors that Grizabella was watching the festivities with a curious and longing expression.
No one noticed as I slipped through the doors to follow her.
Boy, I had fun writing this one. I hope you don't mind how long it is / there were a lot of details I had to pack in.
Anyway, r and r!!