Chapter 8: Hitsugaya trades his soul for a soul
He figured the line not to be crossed was already somewhere behind him. One more step couldn't hurt.
"And you just…let her leave? You really did that? You even gave her permission to go? Without saying anything?"
"You're overreacting," Hitsugaya sighed, bemused by the way his lieutenant was gaping at him from where she sat on the sofa.
"You've never confessed to anyone have you?"
"Not that it's any of your business, but no."
"None of my—" Matsumoto looked offended. "Oh, we'll get back to that," she promised. She shook herself in clear disbelief. "I failed," she said to herself. "I didn't teach you nearly enough."
"Now you're just not making any sense," her captain said. He was sitting behind his desk, the morning correspondences untouched before him, including one from the Twelfth Division that had been marked urgent. He had come into the office like normal, made himself some tea from his now overflowing collection, and then immediately became lost in thought. It was well past noon when Matsumoto came in, dishevelled, clearly hungover, but still attentive enough to notice his absentmindedness.
As she had prepared to lay herself down on the sofa to nap off the rest of her hangover, she had jokingly commented on his dazedness.
Without really thinking about it, Hitsugaya had told her what had happened the night before. His lieutenant had shot right up, as alert as could be.
"I can't believe you didn't say anything," Matsumoto bemoaned. "Poor Rukia."
Hitsugaya frowned. Rukia had looked…well, at first she had looked nervous and uncertain. But she had been exceptionally straightforward and open in her admittance, and Hitsugaya had attributed this to her being drunk. A few moments had passed and it was like a veil had fallen over her face. She had seemed distant then, retreated, and eager to get away from him. She hadn't seemed hurt, exactly—Hitsugaya just assumed she was coming to her senses and seemed to have finally realized what she had just told him. He wasn't sure it necessitated a Poor Rukia.
"I was thinking about it," he defended himself.
"This is not something you need to think long and hard about," his lieutenant was lecturing him—a rather novel reverse of their roles. "It's a matter of how you feel. It's not that complicated. Either you like her back or you don't."
"What are we, children?" Hitsugaya rolled his eyes.
Matsumoto wagged a finger at him. "Don't avoid the point," she said. "Do you like her back or not?"
The captain fell silent. Matsumoto let him be for a while, patient for once in her life, but the longer he kept quiet, the wider her smile stretched. When she was outright grinning, she confidently said, "You like her back."
Hitsugaya sighed.
There had only been a few hours between standing on that rooftop last night and when he came to the office. He hadn't slept. He'd sat in his quarters and filled his mind with that little Shinigami called Kuchiki Rukia.
The more he had thought about what she had said—I think I like you, I'm pretty sure—the more he couldn't get her out of his mind, not even enough to sleep. Though he wasn't experienced at these things, he was at least self-aware enough to know that he was expected to give an answer. He realized this was probably what Rukia had been waiting for last night. But Hitsugaya's mind had been busy thinking about how her confession had made him feel.
He had come to several conclusions in the following hours. It was like a cloud of smoke had suddenly dissipated.
He missed Rukia. He missed having her around, missed talking to her, missed being able to answer her questions. More concernedly, he missed having access to her. The month he hadn't gone to see her had been by his own decision. But now that he knew he wasn't on the hook for that, his immediate plan had been to find a way to start seeing her again. Now that she was back at her division, as a lieutenant, no less, he knew that this would be almost impossible. As much as he liked and admired Ukitake, he was somewhat envious of how close the man was to her. He had thought about her well-known friendship with Abarai and found that he now kind of despised the man. Hirako also seemed to have an interest in her. Worst of all was the very clearly intimate relationship she had with Kurosaki. Rukia had given up her powers, had been willing to give up her life, for the boy and he had literally invaded Soul Society for her. It went without saying that there was something between them.
Hitsugaya found that he did not like this at all.
He found himself thinking that Rukia had been his during those weeks they had been locked up together. All of her time, all of her conversations, all of her smiles and those bubbly laughs she would make, those tiny frowns she made when her calligraphy smudged, all those little bites of her lip while she knitted—they had been because of him, for him, or only for him to see.
And now he no longer had access to them, to her.
But the real nail in his coffin, so to speak, had been the thought of kissing her, a thought that had materialized in his mind from seemingly out of nowhere. He found he wanted to kiss her, when she had looked at him with those wide eyes of hers last night, when she had looked up at him from her eyelashes, when she had smiled down at him from the snowy hilltop in his inner world, when she had stood at her door in her pretty yukata after he had dropped her off, when she had fallen asleep on her calligraphy. There were too many. How had he never realized it before?
The fact that Rukia liked him also did things to him he couldn't fully describe, much less explain. It felt like he had won something, that he had been chosen. Not Abarai, not Kurosaki, not Hirako. He felt fears he hadn't even known he had put to rest. He felt relieved. He felt like he wanted to listen to her say it over, and over, and over again.
The thought of rejecting her never even crossed his mind—and he figured out what mistake he had made last night.
He didn't bother to pretend to not know what all this meant and when he had finally figured this out, Hyorinmaru had given a soft growl and curled in satisfaction.
"You like her. You really like her. It's all over your face." Matsumoto's grin was filled with glee and triumph.
"You are not allowed to say anything—"
"I knew it!"
"—not to anyone—"
"Finally, it took you long enough."
"—especially to Rukia—"
"I can't wait to talk to Rukia."
Hitsugaya gave Matsumoto a glare and she held up her palms in surrender.
"What's your plan, Captain?" she asked him. "You do have a plan, right?"
Hitsugaya did not. He hadn't quite gotten there yet.
Matsumoto heaved a great sigh. "We have so much work to do."
"…the budget presentations are due next week. I need you to look over the spending reports before I sign off on it. I'll need you to prepare the projector, too, and Rukia—Rukia? Lieutenant Kuchiki? Kuchiki-fukutaicho? Ru—u—kia—"
"Huh? What?"
Rukia snapped her eyes back to her captain. She hadn't noticed but his voice had taken on a sing-song, teasing tone, and he smiled when he finally had her attention.
"You were spacing out again," he told her kindly.
"My apologies, Captain Ukitake," she hastily apologized.
He waved his hand magnanimously. "I understand, you must still be in a daze from yesterday."
"That's—yes, I suppose," Rukia sighed.
She was in a daze from yesterday, but it wasn't for the reason her captain probably thought.
"Lieutenant inaugurations are next week as well," her captain reminded her. "You'll need to prepare."
"Mentally," she said, cracking a smile.
"Well, yes, but also, the other captains and lieutenants will be there," Ukitake said thoughtfully. "If I can recall from when Kaien was inaugurated, the lieutenants have their own special inauguration rituals. It will probably involve sake and some kind of hazing event."
"Oh." Rukia's mind had paused at other captains. This was an event where all captains were required to be present. Rukia was doing her best not to picture a certain white-haired, green-eyed, Tenth Division captain. She had been trying and failing this particular task all morning, and this time was no exception.
"Rukia?"
"Sorry! Sorry! I just—"
Ukitake smiled at her. "You seem to have something on your mind," he said, with concern and not a little curiosity.
Rukia held her stiffened posture for a moment longer before her shoulders slouched and she buried her face in her hands.
"I did something stupid," she bemoaned, her voice muffled.
Incredibly, Ukitake didn't look alarmed at his dismayed lieutenant. Instead, his smile became amused.
"Does it have anything to do with Captain Hitsugaya?"
Rukia's little body froze. Slowly, she parted two of her fingers, looking at her captain with one round eye.
"How did you know?" she asked, her voice an incredulous whisper.
Captain Ukitake looked a little sheepish. "You're brother has been airing some concerns whenever he comes here recently—on your birthday and when you were poisoned in particular. Also, he left last night to follow after you."
The girl groaned. "First Renji and now you. I never knew nii-sama was such a gossip."
"When it comes to you, I suppose he is," the captain said, thoughtful.
Rukia sighed, ran her hands through her hair, and sat up straight. "I did something stupid," she said again.
"Involving Captain Hitsugaya?"
"Yes."
"Something serious?"
"You could say that."
"Is it bad?"
"You could say that, too."
"Fixable?"
"Not unless you can go back in time."
"Redeemable?"
"Probably not."
"Forgivable?"
"Unlikely."
"Now, I think you're being dramatic. What exactly did you do to Captain Hitsugaya?"
"I told him I think I like him."
There was a pause.
"You told him…that you think you like him?"
"Actually, I said I was pretty sure."
Rukia was looking off into the distance unseeingly. She resisted the urge to bury her face in her hands again.
Ukitake chuckled, startling her.
"Did you mean it?" he asked.
She hesitated, but then nodded, feeling her cheeks warm.
"Ah," her captain said. "And why is this bad, unfixable, irredeemable and unforgiveable?"
"Because—because—he doesn't like me back! And I've just ruined our perfectly fine platonic relationship by making things awkward!"
This outburst left her a little breathless and she had to take a moment to catch her breath back.
Ukitake seemed unmoved. "How do you know he doesn't like you back? He said so?"
"Well, no…"
"Hmm, I guess that means that you're still awaiting a response?" he asked her, smiling.
"I guess," Rukia agreed hesitantly.
"And all these fears are unnecessary?"
Rukia remained quiet.
"The way I see it, either Captain Hitsugaya reciprocates your feelings or he doesn't. Would that be so bad?" he asked her gently.
Rukia felt her face contort at the thought. Just the mention of it stung. Even though she fully expected to be rejected, her heart was still mostly filled with hope.
Ukitake's eyes were very kind. There was sympathy in there but also the kind of experience and perspective that came with age.
"I know it may seem like the worse thing in the world right now," he said, "But even if he rejects you, the faster a wound is opened, the quicker it can heal."
Rukia nodded in a way that clearly told him she didn't really believe it but was agreeing with him for the sake of it.
Ukitake sighed. "For what it's worth, Tōshirō isn't the kind of person to abandon a friendship because of something like this. You won't lose him as a friend, no matter what happens."
More nodding.
To be fair, Rukia was listening. But like her mind had been doing all day, it super focused on the word Tōshirō. She almost said it out loud, wondering how it would feel in her mouth. Captain Hitsugaya was a person well-known for despising when people referred to him by his first name. To be able to do so must be some kind of special privilege.
"I think you should talk to Captain Hitsugaya," Ukitake suggested. "Since this seems to be bothering you so much."
Rukia winced, prepared to protest—only to immediately freeze. She and Captain Ukitake stared at each other: Rukia's eyes held disbelief, Ukitake's a horrific kind of amusement.
There was a knock on the office door. From the other side, Sentaro's voice called: "Captain, Lieutenant, Captain Hitsugaya is here to see you—"
"I told you I was going to announce the captain!" Kiyone's voice interrupted.
"No, I said I was!"
As the two third seats bickered behind the door, Ukitake gave his lieutenant a questioning gaze. Rukia took a moment to collect herself and then nodded to him.
"Let him in."
Captain Hitsugaya came in. Despite trying not to, Rukia still caught his eyes but quickly looked away.
"Your third seats are as argumentative as always," he commented dryly to Ukitake.
The older captain gave a laugh that was a touch nervous. "One day they'll grow out of it. Maybe. How can I help you Captain Hitsugaya?"
Hitsugaya brazenly pointed a finger at Rukia's dark head.
"I came to burrow your lieutenant," he said like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Rukia's head jerked up, eyes wide with surprise, face flushing ever so slightly. Even Ukitake looked shocked by this. The corner of Hitsugaya's mouth twitched.
"Kurotsuchi wants to see us," he explained. "He wants to make sure our reiatsu composition isn't affected by what happened. I came to collect Rukia and her zanpakuto. Can you spare her for the rest of the day?"
"It will take that long?" Ukitake asked dubiously.
"Who knows?" Hitsugaya replied with a shrug. "But I can assure you she'll be gone for the rest of the day."
Once again, Ukitake exchanged a look with Rukia. Over the years, the two had learned to communicate through facial expression alone.
"I can spare her," Ukitake said and Rukia got to her feet. Her captain followed her back with a complex look as they left.
The Thirteenth and Twelfth Divisions were neighbours. After Kurotsuchi had, for want of a better word, experimented on her after the whole Hogyoku business, Rukia had been rather resentful of his proximity. Now, she couldn't have been more grateful.
Few words were said between her and Hitsugaya as they walked the short distance, except for him to tell her that Kurotsuchi was expecting them immediately.
At the Twelfth, Nemu brought them over to Kurotsuchi's primary lab. Rukia took one step inside and froze. Hitsugaya had walked a few paces in before he realized she had stopped and turned to look at her.
The girl's face had been a pretty pink all the way to the Twelfth but now, it was as white as his haori. Her round eyes were flickering around the room, which was very much like a traditional laboratory, with strange-looking equipment, steel examination tables, cupboards with jars filled with all manner of things.
Hitsugaya watched her visibly swallow, take a deep breath, and then step further into the room.
"You okay?" he asked her quietly when she was next to him again. For the first time since he'd first step into Ukitake's office, Rukia met his eyes.
"Fine," she said shortly, and looked away.
"Please wait here," Nemu pointed to two chairs side by side. "I will go call Captain Kurotsuchi."
The room was very quiet after she left. Somewhere among Kurotsuchi's many experiments, there was the sound of water dripping. Hitsugaya looked over at Rukia.
The girl was sitting stiffly in her chair, head bowed, jaw tense. Her hands were laid across the chair's armrests and he could see that her small hands were clenched into fists so tight that her knuckles had gone white.
He remembered, suddenly, in one of their many mornings together, that she had mentioned something about having to see Kurotsuchi in his lab after she had been cleared of her treason charges. She hadn't said much other than that she wasn't very fond of the Twelfth Division captain—which hadn't surprised Hitsugaya at the time because this feeling was almost universal among Shinigami. But now, going by her reaction to being in this room, he realized the experience must have been particularly unpleasant for her.
Wordlessly, Hitsugaya draped his hand over the fist that was closest to him. His hand blanketed hers, the tan of his skin noticeably contrasting to hers. Her fist felt very cool under his palm, and the raised bumps of her bones were very pronounced and sharp. This hand, in all its delicateness and smallness, could wield a deadly zanpakuto.
Rukia jumped at the touch but didn't immediately pull away. Startled eyes looked at him. He met this look with a slightly arched eyebrow and saw her mouth drop open in a small o before the door opened and Kurotsuchi walked in.
"Oh good," Kurotsuchi said in that animated, high pitched voice of his. "You've already gotten started."
Rukia stiffened even more and Hitsugaya squeezed her hand reassuringly. He frowned at Kurotsuchi who was pulling on a pair of gloves over his blue hands.
"What exactly are you going to do?" he asked, a touch suspicious.
"An experiment," the other captain replied primly, punctuating with a snap of the glove against his wrist. His eyes moved between Rukia and Hitsugaya.
"Please relax yourself, Captain Hitsugaya, this won't be terribly invasive. Probably. I see you've brought your zanpakuto's along. Good."
With this kind of tepid assurance, Kurotsuchi wheeled a tall metal table over to them. On the table was what looked like a computer monitor and a pair of white gloves with a skeletal frame of black beads connected by silver lines. Kurotsuchi turned the monitor to face himself and picked up the gloves.
"Which is the hand you used most with your zanpakuto?" he asked. Hitsugaya raised his right hand. Unfortunately, Rukia had to drag hers out from under his to indicate her right hand as well.
"Put this on," he handed them each a glove. There were beads and lines on both sides of the gloves so they could fit on the left or right hand. The gloves appeared to be connected to the monitor by several wires.
Rukia waited until Hitsugaya slipped his on, making sure it was safe. He gave her a small nod and then she put hers on. It was a loose fit and was itchy but didn't seem like it would electrocute her. Yet.
Kurotsuchi was peering at the monitor. He looked for a moment before bringing his gaze to Rukia. "You're suppressing your reiatsu," he said flatly.
Rukia flushed. "Sorry," she mumbled. "Habit." She gave up restraining her reiatsu but his eyes lingered on her for a moment more before he returned to the screen.
From within his haori, Kurotsuchi pulled out a clipboard and a pen. He wrote something down and then spoke again: "Focus around two percent of your reiatsu into the glove."
Two percent wasn't a lot but Kurotsuchi wrote something down again.
"Twenty-five percent," he instructed.
The difference between Hitsugaya's and Rukia's reiatsu was noticeable here, a layer of frost emanating from Hitsugaya's gloved hand and down the leg of his chair. The Captain was clearly rigorously controlling it but the chill around him still made Rukia shiver.
"Hmm, interesting," Kurotsuchi murmured to himself, but didn't seem inclined to share his thoughts with the other two Shinigami. "Fifty percent."
There was a sharp drop in temperature in the laboratory. Some delicate glass instrument across the room broke by the sudden change. One of Kurotsuchi's eyes, independent of the other, fixed on it. His toothed mouth became downturned.
"I think that's as high as we can go," he said, dismayed. "Go back to your resting level."
The room warmed and Kurotsuchi jotted some more things down.
"Now," he announced, eyeing them with open interest. "Do what you were doing before," he pointed a finger at Rukia's glove and said to Hitsugaya, "Hold her hand."
Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow but reached for Rukia's hand. Rukia, however, pulled away. Both captains looked at her.
Kurotsuchi's tongue clicked inside his mouth. "Now, now, Kuchiki," he said, voice disapproving. "This procedure is mostly harmless. It would not be in my best interest to needlessly torture a captain and lieutenant of the Gotei Thirteen, even if the results are bound to be…interesting."
"Reassuring," Rukia deadpanned.
"I do not understand this reluctance," the Twelfth Division captain went on, clicking his tongue some more. "You have survived far more distressful experiments of mine before."
The room, which had been slowly rising back up in temperature, was suddenly plunged into iciness again. Kurotsuchi turned his attention to Hitsugaya, who was staring at him with something that could only be called a death glare.
"I said resting level, Captain Hitsugaya," Kurotsuchi scolded. "And I said to relax yourself." He pointed a finger at Rukia. "No harm will come to that girl in this laboratory. I have been lectured enough by Captains Ukitake and Kuchiki, thank you very much. Captain Kuchiki even went so far to threaten my funding. My funding. No Shinigami is worth my funding, you can have my word on that much."
Hitsugaya didn't look like he believed him, if the scowl on his face was anything to go by, but he reigned in his reiatsu.
The young captain looked over at Rukia, who was cradling her gloved hand to her chest, like he would bite her if she got too close.
"How long do we have to do this?" he asked Kurotsuchi.
"Until I have my data."
At Hitsugaya's unimpressed look, the other captain added: "Should be only a few minutes. I believe I told you beforehand that this would not take up more than a half hour of your afternoon."
Hitsugaya held his hand out to Rukia. The girl was frowning at him and he tried to make his expression as reassuring as he could. Hesitantly, like she had so long ago in Yamamoto's office, Rukia laid her hand in his.
The change was almost immediate.
The lab around him, Kurotsuchi and even Rukia, seemed to melt away. There was a feeling of falling but before he could react to this, he found himself standing in a forest. All around him were trees with heads of pure white flowers. Beneath his feet was an even, soft layer of snow. His feet sank in an inch or two but didn't feel cold to him. The flowers were slowly drifting onto the ground in serene arcs. Hitsugaya held his hand out to catch one and it immediately fell apart into snow in his palm.
He looked around him. The forest wasn't dense but there seemed to be some uniformity to the trees and the distance between them. It reminded him suddenly of the stalactites of ice Rukia had hovering over her that first time he had come upon her in his training grounds.
No sooner had this thought crossed his mind than he caught sight of something among the trees. It was a woman. Even from a distance and only being able to see the side of her face, Hitsugaya could tell that she was very beautiful. She would have blended into the white background if not for her pale lavender hair, several shades lighter than Rukia's eyes. She was wearing a kimono of the purest white Hitsugaya had ever seen (even his haori didn't come close), tied at the waist with a green obi, a purple bow with large, wide loops, resembling a butterfly's wings. She was holding out one elegant hand to a falling flower, which rested gently in her palm and remained whole, long sleeves almost sweeping the snowy floor.
Hitsugaya slowly approached her.
"Sode no Shirayuki," he said quietly when he was close enough.
The woman didn't even turn her head to look at him. "Captain Hitsugaya," she said, and her voice felt very much like those shards of ice that reflected prettily in the sunlight but that would slice your hand open if you tried to hold it.
Hitsugaya sighed. "I don't mean to intrude," he said truthfully.
"I suppose I should graciously welcome you here, given how my Lady Rukia has already traipsed through your soul."
The woman turned to face him. She had blue eyes, Hitsugaya realized, somewhat startled to see that they mostly resembled the eyes of the other Hitsugaya he had had to defeat to unlock his new power. Rukia had an icy gaze, but it was only a surface layer of frost. Beneath it was warmth and a sweet childishness. It was nothing like the coldness with which her zanpakuto spirit was looking at him right then.
"You don't have to," he said calmly. "None of that was Rukia's fault. And it's not like it bothered me."
"Then," Shirayuki drew the zanpakuto from her obi that he hadn't noticed before and pointed it at the hollow of his throat, "Should I kill you instead?"
Hitsugaya's gaze didn't waver but his hand instinctively reached for his own sword, which he had been specifically told to keep on him. Hyorinmaru wasn't there of course and he saw something that could have been amusement but was probably more likely ridicule flicker through Shirayuki's eyes.
"Ah yes, the legendary Hyorinmaru," she said lightly. "I probably shouldn't touch you, since my Lady is in his care right now." She lowered the sword.
"I don't think it's Hyorinmaru you would have to worry about if you killed me," Hitsugaya said, voice even but confident.
For a moment, Shirayuki's face showed undisguised surprise. Then she cracked a smile. There was no dimple in Shirayuki's smile but something about the way her eyes curved reminded him of Rukia.
The zanpakuto spirit put the sword away and began to walk around him, looking him up and down. Hitsugaya remained very still, knowing if she changed her mind and decided to run him through with her sword anyway there was nothing he could do about it.
"Hmm," she said from somewhere behind him. He thought he felt a slight movement of his hair from the back. "Not bad. My Lady has good taste after all. For a moment, I was worried. I'm not sure orange and rain would complement this forest. Could you imagine? All the flowers would melt."
She came to stand before him again. "I suppose I will let you leave here in one piece. But—" the tip of the sword was suddenly against his neck again. The woman leaned in, her smile deceptively pleasant but her eyes giving the impression that she could see what the inside of his bones looked like. Very quietly, she continued: "I will not hesitate to carve those pretty eyes out of your skull, Captain Hitsugaya, if you give me reason to. One for me and one for my lady."
Hitsugaya wasn't a person who scared easily. His fears couldn't be found in the hands of the people who could kill him—rather, they were found in the hands of the people who could kill those he cared about. But Sode no Shirayuki still managed to send a chill through him.
"I won't," he said calmly, and he meant it.
She considered him for a moment longer before she blinked the threat away from her face and stood back.
"I will hold you that, Captain," she said, voice friendly for the first time. "Return to my lady." She held out her hand to him. In her palm was a pristine white flower. Able to see it clearly for the first time, he realized that the flower was a perfect fractal made from ice, like a large petalled snowflake.
Hitsugaya took it from her.
As quickly as he had come here, he felt himself leaving. It was different from when he left his own inner world—it was more violent, like he was being forcibly pulled out. He blinked and he was back in the chair in Kurotsuchi's laboratory.
The first thing he became aware of was Rukia's hand in his. He was gripping hers a little tightly and he relaxed his hold but didn't let go.
Beside him, Rukia was blinking her eyes open. She let out a breath of air like a sigh but it was accompanied by a small smile.
"Really?" Kurotsuchi was saying, his eyes glued to the monitor. "That was all it took?" He looked over to the two Shinigami. "I assume you are back from each other's inner world?"
They both nodded but remained quiet, so the captain prodded: "Would you like to share what happened there?"
"Are the details important?" Hitsugaya asked him.
"All details are important. But I suppose I have collected enough data…"
Hitsugaya exchanged a look with Rukia. He turned back to the other captain. "We decline."
Kurotsuchi pursed his lips. "Very well. But if you do change your mind, my laboratory is always open to willing, and occasionally unwilling, test subjects."
"Is that all?" Rukia asked, and finally pulled her hand away.
"Yes, yes, yes," Kurotsuchi waved like they were now overstaying their welcome. "I have enough data to analyse for now. I will compile a report and send it off to the Head Captain. Please de-glove and see yourselves out."
Outside the Twelfth Division laboratories, Rukia turned to Hitsugaya.
"What did you see?" she asked straightforwardly.
Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow. "All this time you could barely look at me, now you expect me to just tell you?" he replied, half seriously.
Rukia frowned and his eyes immediately snapped to that soft v that formed between her eyes.
"She refuses to tell me," she mumbled to herself. Her sharpened eyes snapped to his. "If you tell me, I won't tell Captain Ukitake you lied about how long I would be away from the office for."
"I'm not sure you want to be blackmailing a captain, Lieutenant," Hitsugaya said, enjoying the way she bristled at this. "And I didn't lie. If I recall correctly, I merely said that you won't be available for the rest of the day. This is true."
Rukia's pretty face clouded with confusion.
Hitsugaya checked the time. "Since Ukitake isn't expecting you back today, your time now belongs to me. Give me your hand."
Rukia stepped away from him, eyeing him dubiously. "Why?"
"Because I can't risk you running away again," he said plainly, savouring the way the tips of her ears glowed red at this. Still looking like she thought he wanted to sink his teeth into her—which, while not at the top of his list, wasn't exactly completely off of it either—Rukia allowed him to take her hand. Without the gloves he could feel the mix of callouses, smooth skin and creases of her palm. Hitsugaya flexed his fingers securely around hers. This hand was his, at least for now.
"This is a little weird," Rukia complained, so quietly he wasn't sure he was meant to hear.
"On the contrary, I'm quite used to it already," he said and, before she could react to this statement, he pulled her into a shunpo, away from the Twelfth Division and eventually out of Seireitei itself.
"This place is?" Rukia asked quietly from beside him.
"Junrinan," he answered.
They were walking on clean stone streets in what was clearly a residential area. The houses were neat little structures with sturdy rooves and glass windows. The people about in the street were dressed well, clean, with slippers on their feet. Rukia looked around without saying anything else.
Hitsugaya didn't give her much by way of an explanation. All he'd said was that there was someone here he came to see.
He led her down a side street to a single-standing house. It was a very traditional wooden-frame house with shoji doors and a wide wrap-around porch. There were other smaller buildings around, a front garden, and surroundings filled with green trees and shrubs.
A small old woman was sitting on the front steps, dressed in simple cotton clothes. She had a small woven basket beside her and a canvas sack with what looked like green peas, which she was shelling slowly with her aged hands.
The entire scene gave off a feeling of serenity.
"Granny," Hitsugaya called to her when they were close enough, startling Rukia.
The old woman looked up and—oh! She had eyes exactly like Hitsugaya's, though shadowed with age. The woman's kindly wrinkled face smiled.
"Tōshirō," she said, in that way only grandparents could. It reminded Rukia of how Granpa Ginrei would call her when he found her loitering outside Byakuya's door sometimes, softly, and with endless patience. Slowly, the woman got to her feet, her movements jerky and stiff. Hitsugaya rushed forward to help her up and, clinging to his arm, she seemed to freeze, eyeing her grandson up and down like she was seeing him clearly for the first time.
"Tōshirō," she said, her voice surprised, "Did you grow?"
By Rukia's estimate, Hitsugaya's previous height had been around his grandmother's. Now, he was a good head taller than her.
Hitsugaya mumbled something to her that Rukia couldn't hear. Then, the woman's green eyes found Rukia. Rukia felt her spine straighten.
"Who's this pretty girl?" his grandmother asked. Her eyes seemed to take in her shihakusho. "A Shinigami?"
Rukia gave her a bow. "Kuchiki Rukia, ma'am," she said, exactly like she had been taught at the Kuchiki compound. When she lifted her head, Hitsugaya and his grandmother were looking at her with almost identical twinkling eyes. Rukia flushed.
"You didn't tell me you were coming," Granny scolded, gathering up her skirts. "And with a guest, too. I would have prepared something for you children to eat. Come, come. Come inside, let me make some tea. Bring those things, Tōshirō."
Hitsugaya obediently hefted the canvas sack of unshelled peas. Wanting to be useful, Rukia quickly reached for the basket of round peas, all but batting Hitsugaya's hand out of the way. He gave her a very amused look and she hissed, "You could have warned me!"
"Why?" he asked evenly. "My grandmother doesn't bite."
Rukia jerked her head away from him and followed the woman into the house.
Around a pot of orange peel tea, Rukia derived that Hitsugaya visited his grandmother often, at least once every two months. It went without saying that he hadn't been able to recently, but Granny seemed accustomed to this, as it was bound to have happened a few times in Hitsugaya's career as a captain.
Hitsugaya had brought her several gifts from Seireitei (including one or two of the teas she had left in his cupboard, she was beyond gratified to see) and a small paper envelope Rukia politely ignored. By the way Granny was piling this and that onto the table by Hitsugaya's elbow, it was clear that they would be taking back a few gifts with them as well.
"This is for Momo-chan," Granny said, sliding over a small, doily-looking piece of cloth Rukia realized was what the girl usually had tied over her bun.
Hitsugaya nudged it back. "You can give it to her yourself," he said. "She has a few days off coming up, she'll come visit you."
"What about Rangiku-san? Neighbour Jiro recently gave me some moonshine, I saved a bottle for her."
"She really doesn't need it," Hitsugaya said exasperatedly.
"She won't forgive you if you leave it," Rukia whispered to him while Granny retrieved it from the other room.
"What she doesn't know can't hurt her."
"I'd tell her."
Hitsugaya frowned at her and Rukia looked back at him innocently. "If you had to choose between me and Matsumoto who would you choose?" he asked her suddenly. His tone was teasing but his eyes were oddly serious.
Rukia blinked at him for a moment. Then she gave him a dimpled smile. "Rangiku-san," she answered sweetly.
Granny came back into the room and put the bottle on the table. Reluctantly, Hitsugaya accepted it.
Hitsugaya's grandmother didn't have enough spiritual energy to require food, but she kept a hearty stock of it around for when Hitsugaya, or Momo, or Rangiku visited her. She made them dinner and seemed content to listen to Hitsugaya and Rukia talk about their lives in Seireitei. Rukia told her about her lieutenant's exam, and her brother, and her friends in the Human World. The woman seemed happy to listen to the young people talk. Rukia felt a pang at the thought that she now lived in this house alone. At some point, when the sun began to set, Rukia excused herself to sit outside on the porch, which Hitsugaya knew was to give him a few moments alone with his grandmother before they left.
"You must tell me what Rukia-chan likes to eat," his grandmother said casually. "So I can be prepared for when she next comes to visit."
"Rice dumplings," he said, "Cucumber, and eggs."
His grandmother nodded.
Sometime later, Hitsugaya slid the door open and found Rukia sitting outside. He closed the door, behind which his grandmother had insisted on cleaning up by herself, and joined her, leaving only a small amount of space between them.
The dusk was painting the sky pretty warm colours that bled onto Rukia's pale skin, giving her eyes an opaque, almost jewel-like shine. It was hard to read the expression in them but she was looking at him firmly.
"Why did you bring me here?"
"Because I wanted to."
Matsumoto had suggested a romantic dinner in a restaurant somewhere, or a moonlit walk along the canal, or something like that. But in Hitsugaya's mind, he and Rukia had already done all of that. He wanted to do something that was more special, more personal. As much as Matsumoto liked his grandmother, she had felt taking Rukia along on his routine visit would come across as an afterthought. But Hitsugaya knew that Rukia couldn't be impressed with fancy dinners and stereotypical romanticisms, and even if she enjoyed that kind of thing, there would be time for it later. He had wanted to bring her closer into his life. His family wasn't much but he had wanted her to know that he trusted her with it. This was the most sincere thing he could do.
He said all of this to her and she listened quietly. When he was done, she said with a smile, "Did you have to basically kidnap me, though?"
"You weren't complaining before."
"I didn't want your grandmother to know how many lines you crossed, dragging me here without even telling me. She obviously thinks very highly of you."
"Why wouldn't she?" he deadpanned.
"Does she…know?" Rukia asked hesitantly.
"I've never brought anyone to see her before," he told her simply, "Much less a girl. She probably already figured it out."
"Oh," Rukia blushed. "Hyorinmaru said you had something to tell me," she said. "Earlier, that's what he told me. You haven't actually said it yet, though."
Hitsugaya turned his head to look at her. Even when sitting, his head was above hers. She was looking up at him expectantly, and her eyes told him plainly he wouldn't be let out of this easily.
He had rehearsed, with Matsumoto's help, what to say. The woman wasn't good at paperwork but she was good at these things, but everything she had said flew out of his mind when his eyes found the corner of her lip that Rukia was pulling on with her teeth in apparent nervousness.
He had misled Rukia and Captain Ukitake to bring her here, hadn't told anyone where he was taking her (except for Matsumoto, who had been sworn to secrecy) and had pretty much kept her in the dark about the whole thing, all for the sake of this one moment to tell her how he felt.
He figured the line not to be crossed was already somewhere behind him. One more step couldn't hurt.
Hitsugaya's hand found hers where it rested on the step between them. Rukia's eyes flickered down there instinctively, only to snap back up when his head swept down. He caught sight of how they widened and how her mouth, very helpfully, dropped open ever so slightly.
It was somewhat amusing how she gave a small gasp right before his lips touched hers, and her fingers curled tightly in his hand. Hitsugaya wasn't extensively experienced at kissing, despite Matsumoto's somewhat desperate but short-lived attempts to lecture him on it, but he clearly had more experience than Rukia. She froze initially, but then relaxed, tilting her head willingly when his hand came up to hold her chin.
This angle of sitting side by side on the steps wasn't comfortable and Hitsugaya ended up leaning forward until Rukia's back was pressed against the wooden railing. One of her hands had to come up to hold onto the lapels of his shihakusho to leverage herself, the backs of her cool fingers brushing against his skin. There was some movement against his back, which he realized was her wrapping her other arm around him, probably to steady herself, but which sent a jolt up the length of his spine.
He reciprocated, putting his arm between her and the railing, splaying his fingers up against her sharp shoulder blade. His thumb brushed gently against the edge of her lower lip and then he pulled back, putting some distance between their faces.
"Will that do?" he asked.
Rukia's expression was obviously shocked, but, accurately reading the teasing in his question, her brow furrowed, mouth downturning into a pout. The fingers of her hand laying against his spine pinched him brutally and he chuckled, pulling her back up into a sitting position before letting go of her.
The sun had well set by now and there were only stars in the sky.
"What do we do now?" Rukia asked him quietly when she could find her voice again.
"Date, according to Matsumoto," he replied naturally, "But we can do whatever you want or don't want to do."
She seemed to think about it.
"Tōshirō," she said.
He raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"
"No," Rukia shook her head. "I want to call you Tōshirō. At least in private."
Hitsugaya smiled.
"And I want to come with you when you visit Granny again."
"I'm sure she'd like that."
"And I get to come see you at your office whenever I like."
"You have a lot of demands."
"And you have to break the news to Nii-sama."
"That's—" Hitsugaya gave her a flat look, "—something we should both do."
"I'll give him a heads up," she said cheekily. "But after that, you're on your own."
"Your brother might not approve of me," he pointed out.
"He will," she said confidently. "He complained to Renji and Captain Ukitake, but if he doesn't tell me directly, it means he doesn't really mind."
"I'll have to take your word for it," he mumbled, having already considered he would have to face off with Captain Kuchiki at some point. "Anything else?"
Rukia thought about it. "I still want you to say it," she said at last, not very serious.
"Alright."
Hitsugaya kissed her again but it was very short-lived this time because Rukia bubbled up with laughter.
When they were leaving, he handed her a small bag of dried orange peels. "My grandmother makes this from her own oranges," he said. "When I was young, I used to help her. This is for what you left in my cupboard. When did you do that, by the way?"
Rukia took the bag of orange peel and held it carefully.
"The day before the exam," she replied. "Lieutenant Matsumoto let me in when you were out. Didn't she tell you? I suppose she could have forgotten."
"Unlikely," Hitsugaya said wryly, unable to believe Matsumoto could forget such a thing. It was more likely that she had wanted him to find it himself. He thought back to how she had frowned at him before she left to join the other lieutenants at the exam and figured it was because of this. He eyed the girl before him, who was looking into the bag with interest.
"There was no cherry blossom this time," he stated, curious.
Rukia blinked up at him. "Oh? Oh, right. You didn't seem to like it, so I told Orihime not to include it."
Hitsugaya realized that she was referring to the letter she had written for Hirako to take to the Human World. That sack of Christmas gifts must have included the boxes of tea now sitting in his cupboard.
"It was a little sweet," he said, still somewhat disappointed. "But that doesn't mean that I didn't like it."
The girl looked amused. "Duly noted, I'll remember that next time."
And yet still, Hitsugaya was even more displeased with this statement.
Granny bid them a safe return, sweetly promising Rukia that she would make her rice dumplings the next time she saw her. Hitsugaya secured his hold on Rukia's hand and pulled her out into the cool night. "Still weird?" he asked, referring to their joined hands.
"I'll get used to it," Rukia mumbled, but gave his hand a squeeze.
Hitsugaya took her all the way back to the Thirteenth Division barracks. At her door he was reluctant to let go of her hand. Rukia tried to, exasperatedly, pull away, but the more she tugged, the more he resisted, until she pulled so hard that she bounced back against him.
Hitsugaya chuckled and took the opportunity to wrap his arms around her. "Come to my office tomorrow to receive Kurotsuchi's report," he said to her.
"Are you worried?" she asked, voice muffled by his chest.
"No," he said simply.
"Me neither." Rukia peeled away from him. "Shirayuki seems not to mind."
Which was reassuring for Hitsugaya, since the zanpakuto spirit had threatened to carve his eyes out for her mistress, which he could tell Sode no Shirayuki had failed to mention to Rukia. He supposed it would put him in Shirayuki's good graces if he said nothing about it as well.
"Kurotsuchi would have told us if there was something to be worried about," he said.
"I suppose." Rukia gave him a smile that was somewhat like a grimace. "Captain Ukitake is going to tell me I told you so tomorrow."
"Would you like me to be there?" Hitsugaya asked, half serious, half playful.
She scoffed and pushed away from him. "I can handle a little teasing," she said, reaching for her door.
"Good, because you'll also have to deal with Matsumoto tomorrow too," he replied, a little wry. "It might be the first time in history she gets to the office before me."
"No, thank you," Rukia said cheerfully. "Rangiku is all yours." She blew him a kiss and slipped inside. The door shut with a quiet but firm click.
Hitsugaya was a little taken aback at first. He was rather looking forward to a farewell kiss. But the thought that he would be seeing her tomorrow kept the smile on his face.
"Goodnight Rukia," he said quietly to her closed door before he turned and shunpo'd away.