"The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself."

― Mark Twain

Chapter 8

It was way past my bedtime but I couldn't sleep.

I crawled into Shika's bed, something I haven't done in months. He was nodding off but wasn't too upset when he felt an extra body next to him. I pressed myself to his back and felt him retreat.

"You're like ice." He groaned, pulling his toes away from mine.

Shika was warm, I cuddled closer to steal his body heat.

"Grrr... " I growled behind his neck, "I'm a zombie."

"Sure feels like you were buried 6 feet under." He shivered.

I sighed. "Hey Shika," I asked, tone no longer playful, "Do you think … I'm actually a zombie?" I really meant it.

"Hm like cold as the undead? What are you even talking about right now?"

His presence was comforting, I miss being so close to him.

"Why are you a zombie?"

So I told him about today. Not everything, but just the important parts. I honestly didn't want to but I just don't have the heart to lie to him. It felt like ripping off a bandage.

I scrunched his shirt between my grip, "I...I'm a skeleton in a flesh suit."

Shika didn't respond right away. The silence forced an unnerving tension to build in my chest.

"So... a human?"

I snorted, exasperated. "Very funny, Shika. I'm being serious."

"So am I. Aren't we all skeletons in human flesh?"

My cheek was pressed firmly to his back, "You're not wrong."

"Hm, when am I ever wrong."

I chuckled, "Whatever you say smarty-pants."

"You're the one with higher grades."

Silence followed again. This time, more comforting.

"...Hey Shika."

"Yea?"

"How do you do it?"

"What do you mean?"

"Sometimes...it all feels so surreal." I admitted, "the kidnapping, ninjutsu, and…"

I took in a deep breath.

"Me."

I raised my eyes and even in the darkness Shika's eyes were clear like stars. He turned his body to face mine and I can only decipher the expression of confusion on his face.

"How so?"

I held up my hand, gazing at my unscared skin. With a sharp jolt of chakra, a rod of bone ripped open my palm. Just like how I practiced with Itachi.

"Is it not strange? Out of all the genetic mutations, mine literally force bones from my body. It's not exactly inconspicuous." I released the pressure and the bone shrunk back. It was clean, no blood.

I felt Shika's eyes linger at the middle of my palm. This wasn't new to him, he already saw me when I first transformed. His eyes were curious, not bewildered, but genuinely inquisitive. He wasn't afraid of me.

I sucked in a breath, "If only I had magnet release, ice release or... just ….none at all." I sunk deep into the blankets, "I hear people talk Shika." I averted my gaze, his eyes were clear and it was reading my soul. "People talk about me. No one is supposed to know but it's like they all do."

I tried not to let it bother me but I noticed, kids whisper about me in the academy, behind my back or when they think I'm not looking. The villagers look at me with curious eyes when I introduce myself with my surname. And ninjas― especially ninjas― seem to have some sort of expectations towards me.

"How does Naruto deal with this?" How does he live with this every day?

"So you know..." Shika stopped, "You know."

"And you do too. It doesn't take a genius to figure it out." His eyes met mine and I felt the affirmation of unspoken truths.

We both paused.

"I wonder how he deals with it." I repeated, feeling small, "All the talk and harassment. I barely can deal with a couple of murmurs."

He grasped my cold fingers and I decided that Shika was my favorite human heat pack. "You haven't faced any harassment … have you?"

"Thankfully no. I'm usually covered by you or Ino."

I held his hand tight, "I sound like a huge baby right now, don't I? Afraid and anxiety-ridden just by some pesky villagers."

Shika shifted closer, "It's normal to be afraid, Tsu. No one wants people talking behind their backs. The villagers talk about the Nara Clan's laziness so much, it's basically considered truth. "

"Does it not bother you?"

"Well, I like being lazy. I like people not having expectations for me. It gives me more time to go cloud watching. Imagine if the Nara Clan is prestigious as the Uchiha? Mum would have a field day with morning training."

I giggled. "Mum would make morning training on the weekends mandatory."

"Don't get her started." He shuddered.

I pulled him close, "Thanks Shika."

"You're my sister, I'll love you, human or zombie."

"Promise?"

He latched his small finger to mine.

"Promise."

"Even if I was a demon?"

"I would like to avoid a deal with the devil."

"Hey"

"Joking." He pulled me close with one arm, "Now go to sleep."

Shika was cuddly, warm, and soft like any electric pillow. "Tell me about your day."

Shika sighed, "Close your eyes."

"Anything interesting happened?"

"Shh." He hushed, "Choza-san told me an interesting story today."

"Hmm."

"It's the story of the White Fang of Konoha. It's the tale of the tragic hero."

I scrunched my nostrils as I walked closer, even in the dead of winter the smell perfumed around the premise. Not an unpleasant smell, but very much floral.

My gloved hands reached out to the buzzer, but my arm paused and I searched. After a few moments, I found the sweet fragrant signature I was looking for, I proceeded.

"Ah Tsuno-chan, are you here for Ino perhaps?"

"Hello, Noriko-san! Yes, is Ino available?"

"She is, dear. A little woozy but I'm sure she'll be glad to see a friend! Come right in."

I bowed a quick thanks and immediately turned the corner to her room. I knew Ino's house like the back of my palm, it probably was second to my own compound.

"Tsuno-dear? Would you mind sharing your academy notes with Ino?"

"Mamaa there is no need!" A voice whined.

I laughed. Thank goodness, Ino had me a little worried but she sounds lively as ever, "Of course, Noriko-san!"

Ino had been absent for the last two weeks. Iruka-sensei says it's the flu but I knew better than that.

"Hello hello, your favorite delivery girl is here!" I chimed.

"Goodness, please tell me you're delivering chocolate and not homework."

I found Ino sitting on her bed with papers stacked on an adjustable wooden table. Her hair was down and I was taken aback by how long it had gotten. Her face was a little flushed, but besides that, she looked well.

"I thought Sakura got homework handled, I'm here to give you something better."

"Good, I don't need another lecture on the social-political position of the daimyo. Gosh, forehead girl literally dropped an avalanche of paper on my bed."

"Weren't you and Sakura fighting?" I was slightly curious, but meddling in personal affairs was never really my style. I dropped my knapsack and began unpacking it.

"Exactly! How do you think I felt when my mother just invites her in!" She complained. "Rubbing it in my face that her grades are higher than mine! I already got humiliated by her in our class rankings!"

I took out a couple of bottles containing a brown liquid, "Ehh, I think Sakura doesn't have real ill feelings towards you. Looks like she was really here to help." I pointed at the color-coded notes. "If it were me, you'll be getting one-page chicken scratches."

Ino rolled her eyes, "Yea sure, number-three."

"Former number three." I corrected it. "It's number thirteen now, Sakura has me beat too." I grabbed my cork popper, "Also, you know that's not true! I literally spend all of recess in the library."

"Please our year-end reports are com―" Her gaze suddenly focused on the bottles between fingers, "Oh my gosh, don't tell me thats―"

"Yep," I smirked.

"Ewww nooo! Get that disgusting concoction away from me!"

"Uh-uh, I have strict orders from my dad and your father to make you drink this."

"Noo you said you'd have something better! This is the worst!"

With a little prying and bribing of sweets from Noriko-san, Ino took a bottle. Not without taking breaks and complaining the entire time of course.

"Eww." She choked, "I hate you."

"One bottle every day, preferably after dinner." I told Noriko-san, "Dad has everything written in the prescription."

"Thank you Tsuno, I'll leave you girls alone."

I waved Ino's mother off and turned to see my friend pouting.

"Traitor."

I chuckled at her expense, I wouldn't want to drink herbal medicine either but it works. "How's the mind transfer jutsu coming along?

Ino scratched her head, "It's hard, that's for sure. I can barely meditate without being distracted."

"How did you get stuck in bed? Your dad mentioned an accident."

"Ugh I don't even know how to describe it. I attempted the jutsu and then suddenly everything was just hazy. It was like I was sinking in darkness. There was just nothing." She massaged her temples, "Gosh, I'm getting a huge headache just thinking about it. When I woke up a week had already passed. Mama was freaking out and Dad said I lost the mental connection because I wasn't focused."

"So you fell into black."

"Yea yea, I heard you Naras call it something like that." She pinched the bridge of her nose, "Point is, I woke up with this massive headache. I thought you attached one of your explosives to my head."

"Geez, that's a boost in confidence."

"Of course, Daddy raved about your performance in the Hokage's office. He said he hadn't laughed that hard in a long time. I heard instead of writing kanji, you drew a picture of a clock."

I flushed. Maybe if I knew it was going to explode, I would have been more careful. My lips turned to a frown.

"Ino."

"Yes?"

"You think I can access the Yamanaka clan's archives."

She wrinkled her nose. "Maybe? Why?"

"So I can find a jutsu to erase your stupid memories."

Winter came and the ground was covered in snow. My birthday quickly passed without too much fuss and I was just glad for the peacefulness for the last few months.

The usual cast of people attended my little celebration with the expectation of Naruto. Daen-oji explained birthdays as clan affairs, but Shika and I think it's downright bullshit. No doubt it was some social-political bomb that no one wanted to touch. Naruto wasn't mad, but definitely disappointed. His huge baby blues welled up and for a moment I expected waterworks. But he didn't cry, instead, Naruto gave me his best heartbreaking smiles and shoved a badly written card into my hands.

'Hapy birtday Tsuno! You are a great frend!'

My heart instantly weighed a hundred tons.

The Hyuga Clan did not personally attend but sent a runner to deliver a beautiful white kimono. Sasuke and Itachi also dropped by for a little bit. Sasuke presented me with a dagger. My name was beautifully etched and my breath was taken away the moment I saw it.

"We're here to apologize since Shisui couldn't make it," Itachi explained. "I happen to notice you really admired his sword, so I asked my mother to make one of your own."

"Thank you, it's beautiful…" I couldn't wait to wield it. Besides the length, it was almost identical to Shisui's short blade. I absolutely loved it.

It did bum me out when Shisui didn't turn up. Nor did he show up for the next few weeks. This was the longest I've gone without seeing him. Though I knew he was officially on a mission, it didn't make the elapsed time any less worrying. I tried to visit the Uchiha compound on a medicine run, but as soon as I stepped on the compound I felt a wave of unwanted eyes. Luckily, I bumped into Sasuke who saved me from much of the attention.

"Sasuke" I inquired, "What's going on?"

Sasuke, a little disgruntled to be my escort, "Not sure, father says the village has been unhappy with the police force recently."

"Is it the about the fi―"

Sasuke shushed me and dragged me to a secluded alley. He looked around to check if there were any onlookers. "You can't say that around here."

There was a fire at Konoha's orphanage a couple of weeks ago. The official report says it was due to rusty wires, but that didn't exclude the fact that two children died. Infants actually. The negligent workers ran out before grabbing the newborns from their cribs.

The Uchiha's police got a lot of flack for not being able to control the fire sooner. But the fire largely exposed the overcrowdedness and the inadequate care by the orphanage staff. Naruto was actually moved out of the orphanage. Dad suspects it to be because of the rumors saying the fire was targeted at him.

Either way, public opinion of the Uchiha Clan fell even lower than historic rates. You don't see many Uchiha shopping in the main district anymore.

But that reason didn't sit right with me, there was definitely much more behind the tension. I was about to ask why when my nerves picked up fleeting chakra signatures around us. Not amateurs signatures. Professionals.

I immediately shut up, asking Sasuke questions would do us both harm.

Sasuke, who didn't seem to notice, was satisfied by my acceptance. "Be careful what you say around here, it doesn't exactly help that you look like a Hyuga."

"Don't kill the messenger," I mumbled, "I'm just here to deliver medicine."

"Watch the elders spin that into the village stealing Uchiha business." Sasuke huffed, "Father says I have to be very careful of how to interact with the rest of Konoha."

"The Nara's are a pretty neutral clan. We don't exactly persecute people based on gossip."

"Maybe. But how would I know? Isn't your Dad the Jonin Commander?"

Touché.

I led into the main compound. Extravagant isn't exactly the correct word I would use to describe Saskue's home. The Uchiha district was more of a village inside a village, with communities and roles for everyone. Sasuke's house was typical, maybe a little larger than the average home, but the design was almost identical to all the compounds in its surroundings.

"Anki! You should be in bed!" Sasuke immediately ran to Itachi who was standing in their home training field. Itachi was covered in dirt and sweat, kunai in hand. He was clearly in loungewear, soft pants, and a pullover, not exactly activewear.

"Sasuke you're back. I see you brought Tsuno too."

"Hi Itachi, I assume you're feeling better?" I lifted my parcel, "I still need you to sign for this."

"Give Nara-sama, my than―" Itachi choked into a coughing fit.

"Aniki!"

Sasuke managed to drag Itachi's long limbs into the home without too much resistance. Itachi was almost two heads taller than Sasuke but it was cute seeing him giving in so easily to his younger brother's demands. Itachi was ushered to clean up and I began unpacking the parcel to get prescriptions ready. It was strange, the house was too empty.

"Where's Fugaku-sama and Mikoto-sama?" I asked curiously.

"Father is working in the police station, Mother is probably meeting the clan's business owners."

Sasuke was entertaining himself with one of those build your own village sets. Shika has one too, though he wasn't too keen on playing with it. The board was basically an animal skin map with the locations of the five villages. Game pieces that symbolize the village, troops, and other miscellaneous items. A dice was supplied to determine the success of the player's decisions.

I rather liked it, give it to retired ninjas to create a game that combines map reading and economics.

"Can I play?" I pointed, "You have a fun set up." Sasuke's village was located in the Land of Rivers, squarely between the Konoha, Suna, and Ame. Great location for trade and protection between three major villages.

"Hn"

Sasuke tossed me a flag piece which I almost embarrassingly dropped. I set my own village on the peninsula between the Land of Earth and Lightning.

"Okay call me Mount Lady!" I smiled.

Sasuke snorted.

I stuck out my tongue, "Got a better name?" Mount Lady, literally defines the terrain's reputation, a mountainous graveyard. Notice the keyword here? Mountain.

Sasuke took some time to think, "You should be the Mukurokage."

Lord Skeleton? I raised a brow, how is that original? Whatever.

"Brilliant choice Kawakage-sama, Shall we go to war or declare peace."

Sasuke scruched his nose, clearly, he had a distaste for the name, and tossed the die.

"War."

"Stop cheating, fake-Hyuga."

"Clearly you're blind. I'm not cheating!"

"You are too."

"Am not―"

"Is there a problem?"

Itachi was by the door, looking a little amused at the fiasco he walked into. He was dressed in a fresh set of loungewear and smelling a lot like…

"Eucalyptus. Eucalyptus and cedarwood."

"Huh?" Sasuke was thrown out of the loop by my comment.

"Itachi's shampoo or body wash. It's scented." It wasn't like shinobi were not allowed to use scented hygiene products but it was ill-advised to do so.

"Ah, eucalyptus helps clear up the smoke smell." Itachi explained, "Mother is adamant the house is kept well scented since we work with fire so often."

It makes sense. Just by walking into the Uchiha district, there was an undertone of smoke.

"So what do we have here?"

"Nii-san, Tsuno cheated." Sasuke pointed to the map, a wide frown etched across his face. "She literally isolated her village and there is no way to advance my forces. I can't even attack her!"

"Pbttt." I stuck out my tongue, "That's the point of the location. Why do you think I chose land almost completely surrounded by water? You only have one way in!"

I advanced my platoons who were at the tip of invading the Land of Rivers and rolled the die. Double fives. "Go ahead my soldiers, let them fear the Skeleton Lord, Mount Lady"

"Mukurokage" Sasuke growled.

Close enough.

"I counter with my own platoon. Go forth my River shinobi!" Sasuke threw his die, a six and three.

"Muahwaha! So close but it seems like you are no match for the great Mount Lady!"

Sasuke didn't bother to correct me this time. "How?!" He demanded, "The die is broken!"

Itachi let out a breathy chuckle, "Luck is part of the game, Sasu."

"She's going to have no such luck when we spar."

I rolled my eyes, I almost forgot about our scheduled spar until Sasuke bought it up. I kind of hope Sasuke forgot, but there was no way it was slipping from Shisui's mind.

"Itachi, let me give you your prescription." I grabbed my pouch, "Dad said you have been suffering from shortness of breath, but you don't have a history of asthma―"

"Of course." Sasuke proclaimed, "Nii-san is a top shinobi! There's no way he is suffering from asthma."

"Hmm… but the Uchiha's heavy fire style isn't helping his condition either. I can't imagine how much smoke you guys inhale." I took out a bottle filled with pills. "Dad recommends you take it easy from missions and training for the next two weeks. If necessary, take two pills every time you engage in heavy physical activity."

Itachi took the bottle.

"Since you are also coming out of a cold, I also have cordyceps and schisandra berries for you. Boil into a tea and have it before bed."

Itachi nodded and I handed him the instructions Dad wrote. "I'll do my best but I can't promise Nara-sama that I can completely refrain from missions."

"Speaking of missions, how's Shisui? Any news."

Itachi shook his head and gave a slightly awkward smile, "The estimated mission time was three months, he shouldn't be back for the next couple of weeks."

I frowned, I didn't like that. Something in my stomach just stirred my worries.

"Hmph." Sasuke crossed his arms, "As soon as Shisui's back, we're going to spar and I'm going to kick your ass!"

Final assessments are around the corner. Everyone is studying. Even Shika, though it's done more forcefully by Mum.

Mum kind of leaves me to study on my own, I think she has more faith in my grades but also she's just more worried about Shika. Even since Shika came in last place for taijutsu, Mum made his life hell. Even Naruto who failed every subject had higher marks than him taijutsu.

Shika's worst nightmare came true: Morning training on weekends.

This didn't mean I had any extra time on my hands. Heck, I probably took more of a loss than I imagined with my last bargain. This was the third day I was spending on calligraphy. Shika seriously hasn't touched the workbook since day one.

I slumped over, trying to shake off the incoming cramp. But I couldn't have given Shisui his gift without Shika. While I worked with Dad in the pharma, Mum was teaching Shika the ropes to Nara R&D. Out of the two of us, only Shika has been given access to R&D materials.

I scrunched my fingers, hearing my bones crack. Shisui…

I haven't forgotten, but time is running out. The ball has been rolling but I have no clue how fast. There was no way for me to know but I want to find out. My hands painted another stroke, but my fingers trembled under my grip.

I'm scared. I don't know what to do.

No matter how tightly I held the brush, my hand continues to quiver.

Just how? How do I help? How can I even stop this?

Just the thought of my vision made my stomach twist in knots. The blood. The fear and … the deaths.

A wet splat hit the paper. I don't want Shisui to die, I don't want them to die. The pills … were the only way I thought I could deter him from his death by even 1%.

I sniffed, now I can't have snot dripping out. I'm already crying.

I'm very aware of how weak I am. How little power I actually have. How sometimes I feel absolutely insane for trusting my dreams.

Oh gosh, I have to redo this page. My tears made the ink run everywhere and it's completely illegible. Practice for sealing. This is practice for sealing. I repeated.

It was by mid-afternoon when my inkstone fell completely empty. I had the last ten or so pages left in Shika's workbook and I was eager to get it done. My hands were really sore from the continuous writing and I can see the beginning of a writer's bump on my fingers.

"Mum! Where do we keep the extra ink pots?" My voice was strained, and I hope Mum didn't ask any questions. How do I even explain why I was crying, while doing homework that's not actually my homework?

"Check the storage upstairs!"

The upstairs storage was basically the attic where Dad kept old documents and furniture. A wave of dust hit my nostrils and as soon as I opened the sliding doors, I couldn't help but automatically start sneezing and covering my face. None of the boxes were labeled so I wasn't even sure where to start looking.

I did an inventory of the closet and I noticed a particular box shelved high up without much dusting. Maybe that's the box? It would make sense wouldn't it, considering Dad probably needs to refill his supplies more than I do.

The boxes were piled so high, I had to stand on the stack to reach the top. The boxes were shaking under my weight and I barely managed to grab that specific box before the entire tower toppled over.

"Tsuno? Honey? What was that?"

"Nothing!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yep!" My voice cracked.

I definitely had to put everything away before Mum came upstairs. Or else, I better be ready for an earful.

But these were not inkpots. Not even close. It was a box of old scrolls. I recognize the scroll sitting on top of the pile, it was the one I gave to Dad, the one from the old doctor, Kusushi-san. I was ready to continue my search before a notebook shoved tightly in the crevasse caught my attention. Maybe it was the color of the beaten wine-colored leather, but I pulled it out. The pages flapped open and a handful of pressed flowers fell.

Daisies, cardinals, and a bunch of wildflowers I didn't recognize. My fingers felt the cool leather and beneath all the dust, tracing a gold engraving.

'Nara Shikaden'

The first page had a dedication.

'To Kaku-nii. The laziest bastard I know. Wake up and smell the roses.'

The book was packed with dried flowers, and to my surprise, the string stuck deep in the middle of the pages happened to be a necklace. It fell loose like the many flowers when I began flipping.

The pendant was obviously wood, dark, and with the rings of the tree were deeply visible. The Nara crest was hand-carved and strung on a worn leather string with dark sweat patterns. It felt good, no bigger than my thumb and it fell nicely into my hand. I couldn't help but wonder if the necklace I gave Shika would someday look like this.

"Nara Tsuno."

I immediately dropped what was in my hands. The book dropped on the ground with a heavy thud and I immediately turned around to see the owner of the imperative voice.

"H-Hi Dad."

He did not look happy. Not in the slightest. I didn't even notice him sneaking up on me. I was sure I was going to get a scolding. Dad usually never cares about the mess, but when it came to his work he was not one to be messed with.

"I-I'll clean up righ―"

"What is in your hand."

I felt my stomach sink and slowly opened my palm to reveal the necklace I found. Dad can be so scary when he is angry. I saw Dad's eyes widen and take in the mess before him. Gosh, I was in so much trouble. Dad was always secretive about his younger brother and here I am going through his possessions.

I prepared myself for a loud scolding, instead, he squatted down and picked up the leather-bound notebook.

"It's been a while, Den." He breathed, eyes old and weary.

It seemed like his irritation disappeared in an instant but I wasn't about to take chances.

"Umm. It really looks like Shikaden-ojisan likes flowers?"

Dad nodded. "The little hooligan has loved flowers since he was a kid. You would think he was a Yamanaka" The lines on his face were soft, casually flipping through the journal before stopping at the first page.

"Uh. Dad." I mumbled, "Here's the necklace that fell out."

Dad stared at my outstretched hand for a moment.

"No, you should keep it Tsuno."

"H-huh?"

He took the necklace from my palm and secured it around my neck. "Keep it safe for me, will you?"

"U-um sure Dad."

"And make sure to clean this place up." His voice again, serious and commanding, "I want everything back to its original place by dinner."

"Y-yes!"

Dad headed downstairs. I sat there a little confused, surprised that I got off so easy.

"Class, when I call your name, please come down for your year-end reports. Aburame Shino ."

"Gah! Ma is going to kill me!" Kiba moaned. He had his face against the table, Akamaru nudging his arm sensing his partner's distress.

"Huh, you want to bet which of our mother's kills us first?" Shika voiced, head slumped over his arm. "If I even improve my taijutsu score by one, I'll be happy."

"Wasn't your sister in the top five for overall scores in the first semester?"

"Down to thirteen last quarter." I sighed. I didn't have high expectations. Considering I was literally out of school for weeks and barely studied for the finals, I was lucky if I was even in the top ten. "Hey, Choji! How did you do?"

"I improved!" He yelled happily, smiled so wide his cheeks held back by his grin, "Sixteen! Overall, rank sixteen!"

"Wow! That's awesome, Choji!"

One by one we went down and grabbed our reports. "Naruto!" Iruka -sensei yelled, "You can't throw your report away!"

"I don't need it! I can still become Hokage!"

My guess is that Naruto did poorly on his assessments again.

"Dunce."

And there Sasuke really couldn't keep his opinions to himself. I couldn't understand why his arrogance inflates so much in class. He's a pretty okay guy outside of school.

"Bast―"

"Enough!" Iruka-sensei interjected, "Naruto go back to your seat!" He collected the papers on his desk into a neat pile "I'll be back in a few minutes, please put your reports away. We will review your written exams after I get back."

Naruto shuffled to his desk and shoved his report into his bag before putting his head down in a small fit. We were supposed to have our reports signed by our guardians, but Naruto didn't even have that simple luxury. It was no wonder the report didn't matter to him whatsoever.

"Everyone knows he's dead last." Sasuke sneered, "Why hide it?"

I had enough. Before I could stop myself, I was already standing. "Can you stop antagonizing Naruto? Some people really don't care about your opinions."

I heard a choked reaction from Shika. This was definitely out of character for me. Sasuke turned to me, eyes meeting mine, expression hardened. "Why should I listen to you?"

I frowned, I really wanted to wipe that shit-eating grin off his face, but my brain went blank as the entire class focused on me. "J-Just you wait," I mumbled quietly under my breath.

Shika looked at me, brows raised. It was a reckless statement and I knew it. As far as I know, Sasuke had everything going for him.

Apparently, Shika was not the only one that heard it because Akamaru snatched my file.

"My-my would you look at that." Kiba whistled, dramatically holding my report like he was presenting it to the class "I knew Tsu-chan was good but wow. Sasuke, Tsu-chan might have a decent chance of kicking your ass."

"Arf!"

"Kiba!" I wanted to warn Sasuke, but not like this. Not a declaration to the whole class!

"Hmm… let's see … Overall written scores" He read, picking through my files, "… History 90... Math 88… Calligraphy 95.." My face grew hotter every passing second, each score he read aloud made my insides twist in another knot.

"Ah, here we go." Kiba grinned, scratching his nail on the lower half of the report, "Taijutsu Ranked 8th. You have 40 wins, 6 losses, 15 surrenders. Hmm... no wonder Mizuki-sensei hasn't been pairing you up with Hinata lately, your records are flooded with absences..." He stopped. "But for Ninjutsu…" He whistles coyly, finally looking up from my report, his eyes sparkling as if he uncovered a hidden secret.

"... Hardy har har, I was wondering why Sasuke wasn't bragging today."

Sasuke's eyes narrowed but nothing could keep Kiba's mouth shut.

"...Hellooo Miss Number One. Didn't think you had such a talent for ninjutsu Tsuno-chan."

I felt my body tense, breaths uneven. I didn't want anyone to know. That was my report! I practiced molding my chakra for so damn long. Meditating and just sharpening my control even since I had access. I should be proud of my hard work … but then why am I so scared?!

"Wow, Tsuno." Naruto looked up at me with admiration, "I didn't know you were this cool!"

"Kiba, stop that." Shika voiced, eyes dark and threatening. His tone was tight, no longer lackadaisical or playful.

"Woah, didn't know you have teeth Shikamaru," Kiba smirked, baring his canine. "How about it? Tsuno v. Sasuke. You v. Me. We're finally dragging the whole Nara Clan into the spotlight!"

"K-kiba, I really think you should stop," Hinata murmured. "This is not a good idea. You know what they say about angering a Na―"

"What? Shikamaru is like overall rank 14? 15? He was with Naruto a couple of months ago! I can take him!"

"I'll pummel you, Dog Breath!"

"Naruto! Get down from the table!"

"Kiba!" Ino shouted, "You're taking it too far!"

Shika was seething. Though I was shaking, I reached out to grab his hand in an attempt to calm him down. "Shika" I whispered, rubbing my thumb across his palm.

Then I felt it. Shika interlinking his shadow with mine, pooling it together like waves. Our chakra was entangled and I felt his sporadic temperament begin to soothe.

Iruka-sensei had entered the room, he turned the attention of the class away from us and for once I was happy for class to begin.

Shika and my shadow stayed interconnected. It was nice. I like feeling Shika's shadow entwined with my own, it was like his heartbeat. Our chakra felt so natural next to each other as if it became one.

"Hey, you know I wasn't kidding Shikamaru. Fight me."

Shika and I were eating our bento in the schoolyard. Ino and Choji were with us, we were going to invite Naruto, but he was serving detention for his last prank.

"Screw off, Kiba." Ino making jabbing motions with her chopsticks, "You're being a real asshole today. Go away."

The sun was so high up, shadows almost royal blue in contrast to the snow. Shika and I were telepathic.

"Am I? I think Shikamaru is just being a chicken. I don't know why Tsuno is so angry, I did her a favo―"

A shadow snapped forward, freezing his every nerve.

Akamaru starts frantically barking but Kiba hasn't realized the predicament he's in.

"Leave."

"Wha―"

"Did I stutter?" My voice, flat. The weight of my words sank as the tension grew between us.

My eyes were pale and reflective in the light. Time was still. I can feel everything, the frozen breaths, heart rates, the fluctuating chakras...everything. I can see Kiba shake but he did his best to keep up his tough-guy act. Akamaru lowered his tail backing away, unsure what to do.

I will kill you.

Kiba's body jolted, knees buckling and the shadow released itself. He fell to the ground and I raised my hand.

"... Sensei! I think Kiba passed out. He looks really pale."

The show was over as an instructor ran over with the school medic.

"His vitals are okay, it seems like the boy just fainted."

"Good. Take him to the medical center, I'll inform his parents."

It was quiet again. Shika and I resumed our lunch. Our bento gets cold quicker since we're outside.

Choji spoke first, "S-Shika. T-tsu... w-what was that?"

Shika shrugged his shoulders, "I don't know what you're talking about."

Ino still flabbergasted. "Wha― What do you mean? That was obviously the shadow possession jutsu!"

Shika continued eating his onigiri, "I'm not confirming or denying anything."

"H-How did you knock him out," Choji said in awe. "It suddenly felt really scary and―"

"Ask Tsu, that's all her."

Ino whipped her head around, "Spill."

I shoved down a spoonful of rice. "Hmm... I have no clue what you're saying brother-dear."

"Hn, I think so too." Shika nodded, "I think Kiba is just feeling light-headed today."

"Agree."

"I guess that's the story we're going with..." Choji sighed relieved that there was no actual fighting.

Ino's expression was still firm. She's not taking any of our bullshit.

"What?! Stop bamboozling me! Spill!"

It buzzed. I feel it underneath me. The parts flowed together with a mix and swirl. They don't dance together but fight in tango for control.

Speak to me.

It was a twist, twirl, attack, and defend. No longer a dance but war.

My innards tangled and squeezed. Sweat was building up on my forehead but I wasn't about to give up.

J-Just a sign. Please.

It erupted. All the pressure escaped, slamming me backward.

"Damn, every time I come in here, I'm always impressed by the chaos."

"Good afternoon to you too Shika." I groaned, "A little help would be nice."

Shika reached down and grabbed my hand, pulling my lopsided self out of a mountain of crumpled paper. The weekend was finally here and so was winter break. Shika and I had an entire month to ourselves before the new school year begins.

"What was it this time?" He eyed the pieces of loose scraps in my hair, "Storage seals?"

"No-no, just the shadow possession jutsu." I sighed, raking my hand through my hair, "I feel so stuck. My chakra is not cooperating for shadow possession. I can't figure out the rules behind a storage seal. It's all so frustrating."

You think I would be happy now that I'm not bombarded with school, but it just reminds me of how stuck I am with my own techniques. Shika has gotten the shadow possession jutsu down, he's been working on expanding his reach and capturing larger targets. It feels a little disheartening when I've been stuck trying to even slightly control my shadow for the past months.

Shika helped dust my hair, " You're doing well. Want to come cloud watching on Hokage Rock with Choji and I? Choji is there already."

My brows knitted together, a little confused, picking through my hair like a comb. "Are you sure?"

"Huh? Yea, I was just there. Came home to grab my bento."

"Eh, did Choji go to grab his lunch too?" It made sense, it was after all past one in the afternoon, but I thought...

"No, he had it with him. Remember? Choji was so upset his mother put him on a diet " Shika said, bemused, "Everything okay? It's not like you to forget."

I scratch my cheek, it felt like tattling. "Uhh... I think Choji is in the shopping district right now."

"Huh?"

"Um wait, give me a second." I closed my eyes and massaged my temples. Now, where is that familiar full-bodied aura? "I… think he's in the gyudon place, or maybe in the convenience store next door? Somewhere in that area."

"Hey Tsu..."

"Don't worry, I'm not going to rat Choji out. But I don't think he's anywhere near Hokage Rock―" I stopped.

Shika had this gaping perplexed expression. Something was off.

"What? Did I say something wrong?"

"What is that?" He gestured.

I reached up to where he was pointing, patting my hair. I probably lodge a poor eraser in my rat's nest. But something unfamiliar blocked the path.

Ah― I see the problem now.

Numbs. Small bumps no bigger than my fingernail protruded from my skull.

The morning breeze was cold. My breath was white and I drug my face into the shoulder carrying me for any bit of extra warmth.

"I hate you."

"Is that any way to greet your sensei?"

"No, you just got dethroned. As of now, you rank below my grandpa on the favorability scale."

"You don't have a grandpa."

"Exactly, I prefer dead over you."

Shisui puffed his cheek. "How rude! This is the first time I'd seen you in three months! I was so excited to see my cute student!"

"Yea, I miss you too Shisu-nii." I moaned, pressing my face into his chest, "Just not at 4:30 in the morning."

"Early bird gets the worm!"

"I'm more of a nighT OWL!"

Shisui jumped off a cliff and we were free-falling, tumbling through the sky, perpendicular to the earth.

"Hang on!"

We flashed across the plains until we arrived in a remote grassy area. Shisui suddenly reached over and I was dropped on the ground. All the tumbles made me want to puke.

"W-Wha...Why are we here?"

"Hm. I think we're early."

"Huh?" I groaned, my butt was flatly planted against the ground and I wasn't getting up anytime soon. The terrain was flat, grassy, and covered with bits of unmelted snow.

"What do you think? Open plains, little bits of tree, and shrubbery. Perfect place for a spar."

"N-Now? The sun doesn't rise till seven!"

"Itachi should be arriving with Sasu right about…"

"Now."

Two figures flash before us. Itachi piggybacking Sasuke who looked every bit not awake.

"Good morning Shisui, Tsuno." Itachi also belongs to the 'early bird' category. He looked so put together not a hair was out of place. Less can be said about his younger brother.

"Aniki, why are we here?" Sasuke rubbed his eyes, still gripped on Itachi's back like a baby koala.

"Shisui wants you and Tsuno to spar."

"Now?" He squinted his eyes, "it's still night time."

Sasuke and I haven't spoken a word to each other since the incident in the academy. Then again, he wasn't exactly someone I wanted to see over our supposed vacation time.

"Yep! If you win, I buy all of us breakfast. If Tsuno wins, Ita-chan will."

Sasuke grumbled, and glared at my sleep-deprived form, "You might as well shunshin to go back to your home and prepare us breakfast because this won't take long."

I was too damn tired to be scared of Sasuke's threats. I scowled back, "Oh, I'm sure Itachi cooks great omelets. No tomatoes please." Sasuke's eyes narrowed and I shot an equally indifferent frown.

"Children!" Shisui beamed, a little too wide for this hour. "I'm glad you both are so excited! But I'm sure none of you wants to eat my horrid cooking so I'd leave it to Itachi-chan."

Itachi rolled his eyes, "Don't worry, I'm sure the food vendors will be open by the time we finish."

"Aww too bad, I was looking forward to Ita-chan's cooking." Shisui clapped, "Spar starts in ten minutes. No fatal injuries. Everything else is okay. "

Sasuke gave one last glare in Shisui's direction and rolled off Itachi's back. Shisui approached me as I stretched my limbs.

"You should already know, but none of that," Shisui whispered, roughing up my hair. It didn't really need help considering I rolled out of bed.

I smoothed out my hair to two twin braids. I nodded. He was speaking about my kekkei genkai. It was supposed to be a secret.

Sasuke and I stood across from each other, with the morning drowsiness finally replaced with the strings of adrenaline. Itachi raised his hand and we were off.

I immediately crouched over as Sasuke launched a full-frontal shuriken attack. I had my kunai in hand, blocking all the incoming stars. He was predictable like that, I've watched enough of his spars to know Sasuke attacks first when he considered his opponent 'worthy'. My ninjutsu ranking must've really ticked him off.

The shurikens exploded behind me and I flung my kunai at him before dropping an axe kick. Sasuke easily blocked me with his forearms. Sasuke still seems to view me as an easy target, he is confident he can win.

In an instant, Sasuke was behind me and I felt something enter my back shoulder.

Shisui let out a low whistle from the sideline. "Itachi, you never mention you taught Sasu-chan to shunshin."

"I wouldn't say it's shunshin, just speed. It is his specialty after all."

I had the chance to look over my shoulder to see the triumph smirk on Sasuke's face. His smile was so wide and self-assured until I poofed into smoke before him.

"Kawarimi huh? Good execution."

Sasuke whipped his head around, now on guard, his hands flew through some hand signs and my eyes widened. I forced my legs to go as the entire scenery was engulfed in flames. I threw myself in the pond, the shock of the cold compelled my body to freeze to the bone. Fire or ice, I have to pick one.

The surface was so bright as I came up for air. Sasuke was standing there, back against the sunrise. A dark contour engulfed his face, eyes intimidating as ever.

"Give up."

My clothes and hair were drenched, it felt even colder than I was beneath the water. My skin was turning blue and a tingle ran down my spine. My lips flatlined. I've waited long enough. I felt my voice shake as I spoke.

"N-not a chance."

His shadow exploded and I can hear Shisui laugh crackle in the background. I pulled myself out of the pond and sprinted towards Sasuke, chakra strings ready.

Blood is a good conductor of chakra, isn't it?

Best I could manage, the string looped around his torso. It wouldn't hold him and I knew it. Sasuke was reigning his senses as I bit into my thumb to draw blood. Body memory overtook me and with a couple of practiced strokes, I slammed my palm into Sasuke pushing him into the water.

I got the look of sheer surprise from Sasuke as I saw the inklings of my seal activate. I immediately retreated as an explosion enveloped the pond. The heat scorched the water, vaporizing it into a thick cloud of mist.

"You're not going to save your lil' brother?"

"No, There isn't enough chakra to do any heavy damages."

And that was the problem. Itachi just confirmed it for me. I'm not good enough to compress large quantities of chakra in split moments.

I felt a splurge of chakra to my right and palmed a heavy kick to my face. My arms shook on the impact as my bloodied thumb splattered us in red drops. I let out a grunt, I don't think I can shoulder any more of these hits even if I can block it.

The mist was shielding my vision and Sasuke was taking full advantage. A hook to my right and palm millimeters from my chin. I did not want to be in close combat with him.

Sasuke was forcing me back and I was taking more punches than I was throwing. I can see scorch marks on his clothing and I knew he took at least some damage. Oh, he was angry. There was so much ferocity and intent to kill behind each attack.

"You want to play with fire?"

A kunai whipped across my cheek and a line of blood was drawn. Ninja wire. He's using ninja wire!

I felt my leg seize from his trap. A couple more ninja tools flew past me, looping my arms and legs until I was fully anchored to the ground. The sides of my arm were tied, I wasn't stupid enough to believe I can break ninja wire with brute strength.

Sasuke stood in front, eyes inflamed and completely drenched. For the first time, I clearly saw the damage I've done. There was a charred hole in the middle of his shirt. The skin on his abdomen was red and blistering. The mist cleared as his fingers ran through the same hand signs.

Fear pooled in my stomach. My fingers sharpen with chakra, I can get out of this. I can get out of this.

"Sasuke stop!"

"Fire Release! Great Fireball Jutsu!"

My vision was wrapped with white. A wave of heat hit my skin in an instant. I was so close, so-so close. All I saw was the center of the fire. My hand trembled to move.

"TSUNO!"

I was gone.

A/N: Happy New Year! I hope everyone is doing well. I do have a small surprise for you all. I'm a very visual person so I actually like to draw out my story and my characters. Would love to share my art if anyone is interested! Thank you for all your support! Always, please leave a review for any comments or feedback you have! Congratulations to all of us surviving 2020! I hope my story brought a little smile to you while getting through this year. New chapter will hopefully be up in a week but no promises!