A/N: I was hoping to get this done before Christmas, it is NOT going to happen. I think it's going to be 12 chapters (11 are written). Welcome to what my beta reader called, "The most uncomfortable thing I have ever read". What did you do David? WHAT DID YOU DO?

Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck

Sarah came out of the bathroom, to find Chuck sitting on the bed, staring at his hands. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked.

He shook his head, never lifting his eyes to her. "Nope. Never. In fact, if we could forget this ever happened, it would be great."

}o{

Earlier

Ellie pulled Sarah into a huge hug, as she walked in the door. "I'm so happy," she said, squeezing Sarah.

"Me too," Sarah replied. Ellie moved on to Chuck, giving him a hug, as Sarah gave herself another internal talk about appearing happy. She was scared to death, if she was being honest. It was one thing to pretend to be interested in and dating Chuck… that part… that was so close to the truth, it was actually no problem. Living with Chuck wasn't a problem, but this new relationship…

Chuck had muttered about her not messing up the cover the other day, but he had no idea how much she was worried about exactly that. She smiled, made small talk, and did her best to look the part. But she needed Ellie to believe everything, and for whatever reason, she was failing.

She knew why. Deep down, Sarah Walker knew Chuck Bartowski deserved better than her. Deep down, Sarah needed the approval of the woman that was one-part Chuck's sister, one-part Chuck's mother, and one-part Sarah Walker's best friend. Because she was; Ellie had become Sarah's best friend. It had been a long time since Sarah had wanted anyone's approval in life, and since she got to Burbank, she had found two people: Ellie and Chuck Bartowski.

"Everything going okay with you two?" Ellie asked Chuck quietly. Chuck gave her a look. "Casey told me about Sarah's worry of getting close to someone and them… well… it being fatal." Chuck's eyes widened. "It's okay, I haven't said anything to Sarah."

"Well, please don't," Chuck pleaded. "We are dealing with… us."

"What do you mean, dealing?" Ellie asked.

"Listen, it's just that Sarah is a private person, and we deal with any issues privately, because that's what makes us comfortable," Chuck explained.

Ellie was silent for a moment. "Chuck, are you two not…."

"Ellie, we are living together, and I respect our privacy, and I would ask you to do the same. I don't want to know about you and Devon. I learned way too much on that subject while living here, okay?"

"Sorry, sorry, I just…" she trailed off, and gave a nod. "Message received. I need to go check on something in the kitchen."

With that, she turned and headed into the kitchen, but not before glancing back at him one more time. "Everything okay, Chuck?" Sarah asked.

"No," Chuck replied softly. "No, it is not, and we may need to leave, right now."

"Chuck, it's Ellie… how bad can it be?" Sarah asked.

"She's implying we do not have an active sex life," he told Sarah as she went to take a drink of her wine.

As she attempted not to perform a Three Stooges-worthy spit-take, he continued "I'll admit that was wrong of me, but to be fair, you did the about the same to me, when you told me we needed to make love."

"Do you think if we escaped out the Morgan door, she's notice?" Sarah asked, giving him a bit of a glare over making her choke.

"Yes, she's probably had it bolted shut," Chuck told her. "My worry isn't now, it's when she has a few glasses of wine." Sarah turned to him slowly. "You know how she gets."

"Jesus," Sarah muttered.

}o{

"How many glasses is that?" Chuck asked a little later.

"I think three," Sarah replied.

"Devon, sweetie," Ellie began. "You're a cardiologist."

"Uh-oh," Chuck muttered.

"What?" Sarah replied.

"I am indeed, babe," Devon answered.

"Is there any truth that sex can kill you?" Ellie asked.

"Oh," Sarah muttered.

"I mean if you have a bad ticker it could, but I've checked everyone out here, save Sarah, so we're all okay," Devon began. Sarah chuckled nervously.

"Huh," Ellie said. "And there are positives as well, right?"

"Besides, just being fun?" Devon replied. "Sure!"

"I think we're okay," Sarah said softly to Chuck.

"That's what he wants you to think. It's Awesome, the man who talked about my sex life right in front of you," Chuck reminded her.

"I mean in women alone, sex can lower blood pressure, give you a better immune system, help with heart health, possibly lower the risk for heart disease, and improve self-esteem. It can also decrease depression and anxiety." He grinned. "And, ironically enough, it can increase libido." Devon chuckled. "It also is an immediate, natural pain reliever, and of course you always sleep better afterwards."

"I see," Ellie said, grinning into her glass as she took a drink.

"And, don't forget how it increases intimacy, and closeness to a sexual partner," Devon continued.

"I'm in hell," Sarah muttered.

"And of course, there's overall stress reduction, both physiological and emotional," he finished.

"Of course," Chuck said.

"It's our bodies, Chuckster, nothing to be ashamed of, right?"

"I don't know if anyone's ashamed, Devon. It's just some people are more private about… that," Chuck explained. "Some people were raised differently, and maybe aren't as sex-positive as you are. And while that's great, some people take a minute to get there."

"Are you saying I'm not sex-positive?" Sarah asked. Chuck's eyes went wide, as he slowly turned to Sarah. "Well?"

"I-I… I was not saying that at all, I was saying… some people," Chuck stammered, trying to figure out what he'd said that was wrong, "are… not?"

"What he says is true, sometimes just having sex can help release pressure," Sarah continued.

"Yes, it does," Devon added.

"And he should know, he's a heart doctor," Sarah continued.

"Have I done something?" Chuck asked.

"No, you haven't done anything, it's just…" Sarah trailed off.

"Sarah," Chuck said gently.

"Things with you are just so intense," Sarah said. "And that's not necessarily a bad thing, it's just… it's a lot, sometimes. It can be overwhelming."

Devon was looking confused. "Too many orgasms?"

Chuck's eyebrows nearly flew off his head. And Sarah nearly choked on her own spit.

"No!" Sarah said. "No, too many emotions."

"Oh," Devon said, nodding. "Is Chuck not using the book I gave him?" Sarah turned to Chuck, as he turned beet red.

}o{

Devon had managed to navigate Chuck off to his old room. What they were talking about in there, that Devon thought should be private… she shuddered at the thought. "Step outside with me," Ellie said quietly. The two went out back, both with a glass of wine. Sarah wasn't sure what to expect.

"Sarah, do have both feet in?" Ellie asked. Sarah gave her a look. "In this relationship with Chuck, do you have both feet in? Or one in and one out, for safety. And-and, I'm not blaming you or anything like that. Please know that, it's just… I don't want to see Chuck hurt, because you're not all in."

"I am," Sarah said.

"Okay," Ellie told her.

"Sarah!" Chuck called.

"I'm sorry if we made things awkward," Ellie told her.

"It's fine, he just has to open tomorrow," Sarah told her.

"You will be here Christmas Eve, right?" Ellie asked.

"Absolutely," Sarah told her, hugging her. The two went back inside, and Sarah gave Awesome a hug.

"You're welcome," he said softly… for Awesome. When she pulled away, she noticed Chuck was red again, and seemed to be holding something under his jacket. Everyone said their goodbyes, and a few minutes later Chuck and Sarah were heading back to their apartment.

"Chuck, what are you holding?" Sarah asked. She didn't think it was possible, but he went even redder.

"A book that Devon gave me," Chuck choked out.

"Oh," Sarah replied, and then it hit her. "Oh!"

}o{

Now

"Chuck, did you read the book?" Sarah asked. Chuck's head popped up, and he looked at her, shock on his face. She began to laugh, and he couldn't help it… he joined in, as she sat beside him on the bed. She laid her head on his shoulder, not really caring right now about all the damn rules and regulations. "Well, the good news is, I don't think anything we do can ever be as awkward as that."

"Sex on a hammock?" Chuck asked. Sarah lifted her head, and shook it. Chuck raised an eyebrow, making her smile. "Oh, a wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am?" he asked, grinning. She shoulder-bumped him.

"I have not. But if we ever figure this mess out, we're gonna find a damn hammock," she muttered. Chuck looked at her, and she held his gaze. "I'm in this."

"I know," Chuck replied. "And that's all that should matter."

"Yeah," Sarah replied, nodding. She looked down at the bed, as his hand took hers. She looked at him.

"But, we both know it's not that easy. So, I'm willing to do whatever we need to do, to make this right for you."

"Whatever?" Sarah asked.

Chuck gulped. "I'm going to regret this but… whatever."

}o{

Ellie walked up to the front door, after hearing the knock. She opened it, and her eyes widened with surprise. "Chuck, Sarah?"

"May we come in?" Sarah asked.

"Absolutely," Ellie told her. "Listen, about earlier-"

"No, stop… you were right, kind of," Sarah said, as Chuck shut the door. "I have all sorts of relationship issues, and I question all the time whether I deserve someone like your brother. I hold back on words, because I feel like they can be used against me, and they have been in the past. So yes, things aren't perfect between us, but we're there, together, trying our best to make things work. We have four feet in."

"She's right," Chuck said softly. Sarah turned to him, and he cleared his throat. "Ellie, we're together, and we're working for more, and I need you to know, we want this." He looked at Sarah. "Right?"

"Right," she said, nodding. She turned to Ellie. "I need your approval, and that's hard for me to admit, but… you have to know."

"You don't need… Oh!" Ellie began, as Sarah spun, cupped Chuck's cheeks, and pulled him in for a kiss. For a second, Chuck's eyes got wide, in embarrassment of kissing Sarah in front of his sister, but that lasted for only a split second, as he got lost in Sarah. His arms snaked around her, hers wrapped around his neck. "Well," Ellie said, a hand to her chest. "Okay."

They ignored her and continued. "Uh," Ellie said, and then she looked away, but turned back. "I think you made your point." Sarah finally pulled away, and held Chuck's gaze. "I get it."

"Ellie, he means everything to me, and yeah, it's complicated. But at the same time, it's not," Sarah said softly.

"Sarah," Ellie said. "I shouldn't have said what I said earlier."

Sarah turned to her. "I get why you did, and I'm not upset with you, but we're doing all we can. And you need to know how much we care about each other."

"Even if we can't always say it, because…" Chuck shrugged.

"I understand… well, I don't, but that's the point, isn't it?" Ellie said. "I don't have to, because you two are together, and you're working for more."

"We are," Sarah said. She turned to Chuck. "Right?"

Chuck nodded. "Right."

}o{

"Shit," Casey, Morgan, and Anna groaned at the same time.

"That didn't even get them to say I love you," Morgan groused. "I had such high hopes, Ellie."

"Time for the big guns," Casey said. Anna nodded. "Time for Operation Ghost."

A/N: ….Next time on Vs The Nerd Herd

"No, you do not see," Beckman said. Sarah didn't speak and Beckman sighed. "Agent Walker….Sarah….you are on the road to becoming who I am. An amazing and distinguished career, the top of your field, and very alone."

"But you've accomplished so much," Sarah argued.

"And who the hell do I have it to share with?" Beckman asked. Sarah pursed her lips, thinking that one over. "Who do I to talk to when I doubt myself, or just want someone to listen, and maybe not understand, but just listen?"

Huh…Operation Ghost…talking about the past….This is reminding me of something…I just can't put my finger on it…