A/N: just a short chapter this time. sorry folks. the final one will be longer.

"Nothing in this world compares to the comfort and security of having someone just hold your hand."
― Richelle E. Goodrich, Smile Anyway: Quotes, Verse, and Grumblings for Every Day of the Year

Past

Unable to take sitting still and stewing in her thoughts any longer, Magna got up and started rifling through the drawers, hoping to find something that would make slicing her hand open worth the trip.

A voice stopped her in her tracks.

"Hey, you're supposed to be resting."

She neglected to turn around to face the source of the scolding, tossing out a folder from one of the drawers. Useless paperweight. "I rested."

The voice drew closer, along with the sound of footsteps. "I've barely been gone ten minutes."

Magna shrugged. "Really? Felt like hours."

Miko huffed and although Magna didn't turn around, kept to what she was doing, she could hear the edge of reluctant amusement in it, even if she couldn't see the proof. "I know you don't like staying still for more than a hot second but you did just lose a hell of a lot of blood. I mean, it's kind of all over the floor and everything." Her voice faded away in distaste.

Magna had a feeling that more than half of that blood belonged to someone else.

"I'm fine. I ate something. I'm good." If she sat still any longer she was going to lose her mind. She'd had too much of that already back in prison. Sitting still and thinking about things that shouldn't be thought about was a way of life then.

She refused to return to that.

"And drank some water?"

"Yep," she popped the word, giving up on the last drawer and slamming it shut. Two fucking scalpels? Seriously? That was all? Yumiko had said that the family that owned this practice tended to outsource most operations to a sister clinic in the city but she'd still been hoping for a little more than this.

Fucking waste of time.

She huffed, finally turning around. "We're going to a fucking Walmart next, I don't care what you say."

Miko raised a brow. "I'm pretty sure you were the one who said we weren't going to Walmart or any other likely overpopulated store under any circumstances."

"Yeah, well," she muttered, slamming the last drawer shut. "I want some damn knives."

The lawyer's gaze traveled to her loot on the bench. "Scalpels not enough for you?"

"Need something bigger. With more heft to it. But, no, the scalpels are fine I just. . ." She didn't know how to explain, didn't even know what it was that she was trying to explain. But she was feeling edgier by the day; like there were ants creeping under her skin, and eyes on her every move; like she was back in prison, surrounded by guards and inmates and walls she couldn't pass through; or worse, shadowing the halls of her childhood home, trying not to be seen, noticed.

"Feel unprotected."

Magna's head jerked up at the words.

Miko was looking at her with a small smile, eyes solemn with understanding. "I know. Me, too."

The younger woman sighed, leaning back against the counter, anger leaving her in a rush as she deflated, suddenly feeling very tired. "That was too fucking close earlier."

Miko grimaced. "I know. I'm sorry about your hand."

"Screw my hand," she spat. "You nearly got bit. If I'd been even a few seconds behind, if I hadn't found something to use to stab that sick fuck with, you could. . ." She swallowed, tried to catch hold of the air that was suddenly eluding her. "You could have. . ." Her chest heaved, lungs deprived of precious oxygen and she choked, trying to force her body to obey, to let her continue.

Yumiko's brow creased and in an instant she was moving forward. "Hey." A warm hand found the skin of her face - she flinched, unused to that kind of contact, from anyone - and another came to rest on her arm, grip gentle yet strong. "But I didn't. I'm fine."

"But you could have." The hand against her cheek felt too hot, too much, but something in her rebelled at the thought of drawing away, losing its touch.

"But I didn't."

Magna stared at her injured hand, away from the other woman's imploring gaze, refusing to be reassured.

Miko sighed, fingers stroking her cheek gently. "You're right. It was a close call. I think we're going to be having a lot of those from now on. We're just gonna have to be more careful. And prepared." She took a breath. "So maybe you should start teaching me how to fight."

Magna's brow furrowed. "You hate fighting."

"Yeah, I do. But it looks like we're going to be doing a lot of it from here on out, so I better start learning now."

She wasn't wrong about that but. "You know I don't actually know how to fight, right? Like no-one's ever taught me or anything. I just picked shit up because-"

"You had to. I know." She nodded. "But that's still more than me. You know how to survive. That's a start. So teach me."

Magna bit her lip, hesitating. How the fuck was she supposed to teach someone how to survive? It wasn't like she'd ever been taught herself. Life had just sort of. . . beaten it into her. She'd needed to survive, so she had. And fuck if she was going to let Miko experience any of the shit that had brought that skill out in her. "I don't know if I can."

But the older woman wasn't to be deterred. She had her game face on, the one she'd use in their meetings, back when she'd still been a prisoner and Yumiko her lawyer, planning a battle strategy. For some reason, it calmed her slightly and she realized that, at some point in the conversation, her breathing had returned almost to normal. She still felt shaky, but that could also just be the blood loss.

Her pride decided it was the blood loss.

"Can you teach me how to get out of someone's hold? Get them off me?" Miko paused, a little grin lightening her face. "Got a feeling that might have come in handy earlier."

Magna wet her lips, thinking it over. "Yeah." She nodded, hesitantly. "Yeah, I can do that." She frowned, considering just what that might entail. "Might have to workshop some stuff. I don't think these freaks feel pain. Or much of anything."

Miko smiled, though, and it didn't escape her notice that she hadn't taken her hands away yet. "There. We have a place to start." As if to curse her earlier thought, the touch on her cheek fell away and Magna's stomach dropped, feeling suddenly lost without that contact to hold her steady.

Instinctively, she reached out, latching onto Miko's hand with hers, fingers tangling. Alarmed at this involuntary action, she moved to pull away but a firm squeeze held her in place. Magna ducked her head, staring at their hands dangling between them, latched together, struggling to comprehend that it was her own action that had brought them there.

She exhaled shakily, flinching as she felt something settle once more against her cheek. When she looked up, Miko was smiling at her still, a shadow of concern in her gaze but expression impossibly easy, calm - like this contact between them hadn't just turned her world on its head and shaken it off its equilibrium in the way it had Magna's.

She swallowed, tried to work her mouth into something that qualified as speech, to say anything, but her head felt empty, her emotions taking up all the space words usually would.

Thankfully, Miko beat her to it. "You know, I'm feeling kind of tired. You mind if we just stay here a bit before we search the rest of the place?" She smiled at her, hand leaving her face as she turned, stepping back into the counter so she could lean against it for support, pose deceptively casual.

The hand in hers didn't budge, though.

Frowning, Magna nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, sure." By some miracle the words made their way out and didn't sound nearly as rattled as she felt inside and, after a moment, she forced her body to follow Miko's example, leaning back against the counter and exhaling.

It had been a long day.

Miko smiled sideways at her. "We're going to be okay, Magna."

She snorted. "You know that, huh?"

The smile didn't falter. "Mm, just a feeling. We're both too stubborn to let this world beat us."

"Not sure that's how it works." But despite herself, she felt a small smile of her own tugging traitorously at her lips. She closed her eyes, allowing the warmth of Miko's touch to wash over her and fight the residual terror away.

"Well, we're okay now, aren't we?" The shoulder against hers lifted in a shrug. "It's a start. We've made it this far, we'll make it farther. Can't imagine it gets much worse."

Magna breathed out.

She was right.

They were okay. For now, they were okay.

But she also knew that things could get worse.

Things could always get worse.

"Sometimes, reaching out and taking someone's hand is the beginning of a journey.

At other times, it is allowing another to take yours."

― Vera Nazarian, The Perpetual Calendar of Inspiration