As soon as the cooler guard had checked up on him the next morning, Hogan jumped off his cot and pushed aside the stone covering the tunnel entrance. He met Carter and Newkirk in the tunnels and together they marched towards the radio room. They found Kinch snoozing in his chair. The cot, however, was empty.

"Kinch!"

Kinch startled awake and snorted. "Wha- what?!" Within seconds he was on full alert. "Colonel what-" He looked over at the cot. "Holy cats, where did he go?"

"I don't know! Did you hear him leave?"

Kinch shook his head. "No. I'm sorry, Colonel. I fell asleep. He was asleep after I finished developing the film and I figured…"

"It's okay Kinch. We couldn't expect you to stay up the whole night."

"Yeah, but I should have gotten one of you or-"

"Never mind that now," Newkirk interrupted. "We have to find him."

"Find who?"

All eyes turned to find LeBeau standing in the hall.

"LeBeau!" Hogan cried.

"Louis, mate, are you all right?"

"I am fine," LeBeau replied. "But Colonel…"

There was something in his tone and the look on his face that made Hogan's heart drop into his stomach. Something big was coming. "LeBeau?" Hogan said after a moment of silence.

LeBeau looked down and dug his toe into the dirt. "Colonel, I did something bad."

"We know," Newkirk said. "You kissed that bird. But it's all right. We got the information and-"

"No!" LeBeau interrupted. "After that. After we got back."

Hogan furrowed his brow in confusion. "What did you do LeBeau?" he asked tentatively, unsure of whether he actually wanted the answer.

"Colonel… I had to. He's my son."

"Your… son? Who?"

"Henri," LeBeau answered. "It was easy. No one saw me."

Hogan was confused- LeBeau wasn't making any sense. Who was Henri? And since when did LeBeau have a son?

"Olsen's car was still on the road. I parked it out of sight and it was so dark that no one saw me. And the kitchen door was unlocked. I had a little trouble finding his room, but-"

"LeBeau!" Hogan interrupted, frustrated and feeling panic rising within his chest. "LeBeau, what did you do?!"

LeBeau turned and started walking down the hall. Hogan exchanged an alarmed look with the others before hurrying after him. LeBeau stopped outside a heavy wood door- it was one of the tunnel's holding cells. He unlocked the door and pulled it open.

Dreading what he would find, Hogan poked his head inside. Sleeping soundly on the lone cot was a small little boy. He was covered in a blanket, with only his face and a mess of black hair peeking out. Hogan drew back and looked at LeBeau, waiting for something that would explain all this.

"Is that the Vahlen boy?" Newkirk asked after he too took a look.

"Non," LeBeau said quietly. "That is the LeBeau boy."

Hogan looked at him in shock and then forcefully closed the door. He grabbed LeBeau by his collar and hauled him away from the room. He practically threw him into Kinch's chair. "LeBeau, tell me what the hell is going on and tell me now," he demanded.

LeBeau took a deep breath. "That woman? Madame Vahlen? Her name is Hélène. She is… my ex-wife."

"Blimey," Newkirk breathed. "No wonder you couldn't get over her."

LeBeau turned a dangerous eye to him. "What does that mean?"

"Ignore him," Hogan snapped. "Keep going, LeBeau. So Frau Vahlen is your ex-wife?"

"Oui. She… left me. Ten years ago. But she must have been pregnant because… because that boy… Henri…"

"He's your son," Hogan concluded.

LeBeau nodded. "When I saw him, I think I knew. But then Hélène came into the kitchen and she all but confirmed it. There can be no doubt."

Well that explained why LeBeau had been so shocked and why Frau Vahlen had wanted them out of the house. But it didn't explain why the boy was here. There was only one explanation for that.

"So you, what? Went back to Vahlen's house and- and kidnapped him?!" Hogan cried.

LeBeau jumped up from the cot and threw his hands in the air, but Hogan threw him back down.

"It is not kidnapping," LeBeau insisted. "He is my son!"

"You went to his home in the dead of night. Drugged him- I'm assuming you drugged him?" LeBeau nodded miserably at the accusation. "You drugged him, took him from his bed, away from his mother and family, and locked him in a cell. I don't give a damn who he is, you kidnapped him!" Hogan was seething. Of all the stupid things to do. Of all the selfish things to do. LeBeau was sitting in front of him, and yet Hogan didn't recognize him.

"I am sorry, mon colonel," LeBeau said pleadingly. "I thought that on the drive out there I would change my mind. That I would come to my senses. But I just got angrier and angrier and I couldn't stop myself. I couldn't stand the thought of my son growing up to be a Nazi and that I might never have a chance to see him again and..." LeBeau trailed off.

Hogan slammed his hand against his forehead.

"Maybe we can take him back," Kinch suggested quickly. "Before anyone notices he's gone. And before he wakes up."

LeBeau perked up hopefully.

"Too late for that now," Carter said, cocking his head to the side.

"What do you mean?" Hogan asked.

"Well he's awake," Carter explained. "Don't you hear him crying?"

Hogan didn't, but he went back to the cell anyway. Sure enough, as he got closer, he heard the boy crying.

"What are you, a dog?" Kinch asked Carter.

"I just-"

"Quiet," Hogan ordered. "Everyone stay back." Growling in frustration, Hogan grabbed the sliding lock on the door. Then, after taking a deep breath, he opened the door and walked in.

The boy, Henri, started in surprise and pushed himself into the corner, trying to make himself look as small as possible. Tears and snot were running down his face and he looked absolutely terrified. Hogan's heart broke at the pathetic sight.

"Hey. Hey, it's all right," Hogan said softly. He crouched down and held his hand out as if he were trying to coax out a stray dog. The truth was, he was no good with children, but he was determined to do his best.

Henri sniffled. "Who are you? Where am I? Where's my mother?"

All very sensible questions, but Hogan wasn't sure how to answer them. "It's all right. You're safe."

The boy looked around at the dirt wall and then turned his distrustful eyes to Hogan. "Are you… the Gestapo?"

Hogan shook his head. "No. No, I'm not the Gestapo. I promise."

"You're trying to trick me," Henri said.

"I promise you, I'm not," Hogan insisted, trying to keep his voice even and gentle.

"Then where is my mother?!" Henri demanded.

"Henri, shhh, it is okay."

Hogan dropped his head and made a fist. LeBeau. He was going to kill him. And Kinch. And Newkirk. And Carter. They should have stopped him.

"Monsieur Fontaine?"

"My name is LeBeau. Louis LeBeau," LeBeau said as he crept closer. He looked hopeful, as if the name would spark something in Henri.

But the reaction was the opposite of what he had expected. Henri's eyes suddenly hardened. "You are the Gestapo."

"No, we're-" Hogan started.

"Am I here because of the people upstairs?" Henri asked.

"The people upstairs?" Hogan asked.

Henri's hands flew up to his mouth. Then jumped to his feet. "HELP! HELP! HELP! SOMEONE HELP ME!" he shouted as loudly.

"No, Henri. Henri please," LeBeau pleaded, but Henri ignored him, continuing to yell at the top of his lungs.

"Colonel!"

It was Kinch. Hogan looked over his shoulder at him. "We're kind of busy right now, Kinch."

Henri suddenly stopped yelling and looked at Kinch with a mixture of fear and curiosity. Hogan sighed in relief. Maybe that would convince the kid they weren't the Gestapo.

"Colonel, Fuller called down. The Gestapo just pulled into camp.."

At the mention of the Gestapo, Henri looked more confused.

"Great. Kinch, stay with the kid. Try to explain things to him. But… don't mention LeBeau."

"Colonel!" LeBeau protested.

"Can it!" Hogan barked. Without waiting for a reply, Hogan hooked the corporal by his collar and once again dragged him away. "Come on," he ordered. They all clambered up the ladder into their barracks. "Fuller, watch the door," he barked as he marched to his office. Newkirk snuck past him and quickly set up the coffee machine.

"Colonel, we're supposed to be in the cooler," Carter reminded him.

"If we need to, we can sprint back to the cooler before Schultz can waddle there," Hogan said.

"That's true," LeBeau said. Hogan just glared at him. LeBeau wilted.

"Ah! Major Hochstetter!" Klink's voice said over the bug. "What brings you to Stalag 13 today?"

"I am here to tell you to be on the lookout for some fugitives," Hochstetter explained. Hogan winced. They were the fugitives. Vahlen must have discovered his son was missing and ratted them out.

"Oh my, she is very beautiful," Klink said. "But who is she? What did she do?"

"She?" Carter said, giving voice to Hogan's thoughts. So they weren't the fugitives? But then, who?

"Hélène Vahlen," Hochstetter said.

"Vahlen, Vahlen," Klink said, snapping his fingers. "Why does that name sound familiar?"

"Herr Vahlen was a prominent businessman," Hochstetter explained.

"Oh yes. I remember meeting him at a party in Dusseldorf. But... 'was'? I did not know he retired. Or…"

"Herr Vahlen was shot this morning while trying to escape Gestapo custody."

Hogan shared an alarmed look. Vahlen had told on them, sealing his own fate in the process.

"Oh my, but that is terrible. But what did he do, if you don't mind my asking?"

"This morning, the Vahlens' son was missing," Hochstetter explained. Hogan pegged LeBeau with a hard look. "They searched for him everywhere, but when he did not turn up, Colonel Kisling called the Gestapo."

"And did you find him?"

"Unfortunately not, but we did find an infestation.."

"An infestation?" Klink repeated. "Rats? Mice? Bugs?"

"Jews."

Hogan's breath escaped him and he let out a curse. He found himself regretting every bad thought he had had about Vahlen.

"Mon Dieu," LeBeau whispered.

"J-Jews?" Klink repeated.

"Yes. At least twenty of them. And right under Kisling's nose too. Or, rather, above it," Hochstetter said with a little laugh that sent a shiver up Hogan's spy. "He of course was shot for gross incompetence."

Hogan felt sick.

"But Frau Vahlen?" Klink said.

"Her husband sent her into town to look for the boy herself before we could conduct our own search. She and her maid- a uh…. Mimi Renault*. Unfortunately I do not have a picture of her, but you can be sure they will be together. Most likely they will be heading for France."

"Major Hochstetter, you can be sure that if any of my patrols find Frau Vahlen, I will turn her over to the proper authorities," Klink vowed.

"Excellent…" Hochstetter paused. "Where is Hogan?"

"Oh. Uh," Klink floundered. "He and his men are currently serving a week in the cooler. They stole my private property."

Hochstetter grunted. "I doubt a week in the cooler will do much. Perhaps you would prefer if I took him into my custody?"

Great. That's just what he needed, Hogan thought sourly.

"Major Hochstetter, Colonel Hogan is my prisoner. I will deal with him as I see fit."

"Fine." Hochstetter didn't sound happy, but he had bigger fish to fry.

They heard the door slam shut, followed by several moments of silence. Just before Newkirk pulled the plug they heard a quiet "Mein Gott."

Sorry, I couldn't resist.

For those of you who don't know, Mimi Renault was the name given to me in the original Mary Sue Experiment.