Chapter 8 Connection
Bastila sat, knees pulled tightly to her chest, mind whirling. Revan was no longer cut off from the force, the mental block had failed. She came to the realization that she must have broken it when she touched the Force to flush the drug from her system. But she shouldn't have been able to do that. Not only was it supposed to be impossible to pull the Force through another being, but it also shouldn't have been possible for anyone other than a group of Jedi masters to remove that block. She couldn't understand how she had managed it. What's more she had heard his voice in her mind, and he had heard her in return. True telepathic communication meant their bond was stronger than any she had ever heard of. Even now she could distinctly feel his emotions as though they were her own, even catching stray thoughts from him now and then despite her trying to block the contact. What did it all mean? Was there some grander purpose for them destined by the Force? Anything was possible she had heard of Jedi who had been so alive with the power of destiny, seemingly impossible things happened around them. But if that was the case how had he turned to the Dark side in the first place? She very much doubted that it was the will of the Force for Revan to become the most powerful and dangerous Sith in hundreds of years, nearly conquering the Republic and throwing the Jedi into chaos.
Guilt and fear beat at her, she had enabled Revan to feel the Force again, anything he did from that point onward was her responsibility. She didn't know what to do, she didn't know if she could even do anything. If he remembered his old life he would be more than able to crush her like a bug and go right back to the Sith. She began rocking back and forth on the cot; mind racing with fear.
She was so intent on the problem- that when sudden sharp pain flashed from Revan's mind, it nearly knocked her off the cot. She sat stunned for a long moment trying to separate herself from his pain, blindly staring at the opposite wall. When she finally pulled herself free, she immediately steeled herself putting up mental barriers to protect herself, then dove back into his mind. She followed the shining bond back to its source and gently probed his consciousness, searching for the cause of the sudden agony gripping him.
Her mind slid deeper allowing her to get flashes of his surroundings, cold duracrete floors and steel fixtures. A pretty young Twi'lek girl looking up at him with obvious concern on her face. She felt it then the stabbing pain in his side, just below his ribs. She followed that pain down into his body, leaving his awareness behind. She could almost see the knife blade piercing through his side just below his ribs. Whoever attacked him knew what they were doing, they had angled the blade up driving it deep. Just over an inch of the blade had lodged into the bottom of his left lung. Panic shot threw her, if he was even twenty minutes from emergency services he could very well drown in his own blood when the knife was removed. Despite her fear of him and who he could become once again, the idea of letting him die never even occurred to her. In that moment concern for him blocked everything else, focusing her mind to a sharp purpose, keeping him alive.
Taking a deep breath and centering herself she purposefully reached for him, and his vast connection to the force, the bright star of power at the center of his being that only another skilled Force wielder could sense. Instantly power flooded her the likes of which she could never have hoped to draw on her own. This must be what a member of the counsel feels when they draw the force. She thought, feeling as though she might burst into flames at any moment. She released most of the power only holding onto what she knew she could handle safely. Even in her drugged state she had the presence of mind to quickly check his thoughts for surprise or fear at the sudden power. She felt a sense of renewed vigor and energy from him, though he seemed to chock it up to adrenaline.
Breathing a sigh of relief she focused on the wound, using his own immense power to stop the trickle of blood entering his lung. Taking hold of the wound in the Force just in time for the blade to be drawn out, she let out an involuntary sigh of relief. She had cut that too close for comfort, fortunately she had quite the capacity with healing. Relaxing into the Force she focused her mind on the wound pulling the abused tissue together gently and encouraging Revan's body to begin the healing process.
Minutes passed with the healing, Revan's immense power allowing her to make quick progress. So focused on her task was she that she didn't notice her cell door opening…
...
Mission watched as Rorick stepped down out of their stolen speeder trying to make sense of her whirling emotions. He was a very attractive man, maybe not in a classical sense, his nose was a little bit too long with a slight curl. His face was a bit too narrow, his eyes a bit too slanted, and while she found the scar over his left eye attractive, most wouldn't.
Yet to her he looked dangerous, lithe with almost feline grace as he moved, a Nexu ready to strike at a moment's notice. He excited her, she was drawn to him on a deep level, yet she had met others like him and never felt anything like it before. She couldn't figure out what was so different about him, yet there was definitely something. He smiled- his deep green eyes sparkling at her, satisfaction at their success clear on his face.
Carth stepped up and clapped him on the shoulder and grinned at them both. He opened his mouth to speak but stopped as Rorick fell to his knees face paling. She was at his side before she even registered what happened.
"What is it? Talk to me Rorick!" she said looking him over quickly, only then noticing the blood weeping out of the wound in his side.
"Bastila," he gritted out before clutching his side and falling to his back. "She's…" his words faded, he coughed violently blood spurting out of his mouth. His eyes rolled back then fluttered closed.
"Medic!" Carth shouted at the top of his lungs, the force of it shaking her out of her stupor.
"Stab wound to the side, I think his lung is punctured, someone get Carrin down to the med bay." she shouted out to the people milling around the speeder bay. The room burst into motion but she didn't bother making sure someone was following her instructions. The Beks were well trained in situations like this and she was too concerned with staunching the bleeding to focus on anything else. Then Z was there, he hauled Rorick up into his massive arms clamping one meaty fist over the wound and sprinted out of the speeder bay. Mission jumped up to chase after them, but she knew she had no chance of staying with them. Z handled Rorick like a small child, massive running leaps carrying him nearly six meters with every step. He quickly disappeared through a door at the back of the bay, taking Rorick deeper into the base.
Mission was hot on his heels with Carth right behind her. She flew down the brightly lit corridors dodging around Hidden Beks as they stared confused after the running Wookiee. Moments later Mission charged into the open doors of the med bay and slammed into Big Z's back, budging him about as much as a brick wall she bounced off and landed heavily on her butt in the hall. Too afraid for Rorick to be embarrassed she got to her feet and moved around Z, rubbing her abused tailbone. She saw Rorick on an operating table with their Chief medic Dr. Carrin, and an operating droid examining his wound. His breast plate was on the floor next to Z and one of Dr. Carrin's assistants was working his boots off. The wound in his side was an angry puckered thing, seeping bright red bubbling blood, though part of her realized that there should have been much more of it.
"Is he going to make it Doctor?" Carth said from beside her, she hadn't even noticed him approaching.
"I can't say for sure," she said pushing a hypo into the wound and injecting him with something, "But I think he'll be alright. He's lost a lot of blood, but not nearly as much as he should have, the sealing foam saved him from the worst of it I think."
"Take good care of him Doc, he pulled off something incredible today." Carth said, looking Rorick over with concern. "He shouldn't go out like this, so close to his goal."
"He'll be okay." Mission said, feeling the certainty of it from somewhere deep within.
"I agree," a commanding voice said from behind them. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw Gadon standing there looking poised and relaxed, examining Rorick with his dispassionate robotic eyes. "I believe he still has quite the journey in front of him." Mission nodded in agreement looking back to the man, now naked on the operating table. Despite herself she felt her cheeks flush a slight purple at the sight of his muscular, well endowed body.
Turning to Gadon in the vain hope of distracting herself she quickly spoke. "We got it Gadon, not only that we crippled them."
"Yes we got word of a quite sizable explosion just before you arrived." he gave her a satisfied smile and rested a hand on her shoulder. "You did very well Mission thank you."
"We never would have made it without Rorick." she replied. Gadon glanced at Big Z and raised an eyebrow in question.
Zaalbar nodded intently, "He rescued me from slavers," he growled, "He saved my life and I have pledged myself to him."
"As much as I hate to admit it, he took command and led us through the mission with skill and composure. He was vital." Carth added with a rueful smile.
"Interesting," he gave Mission's shoulder a squeeze, stepping back and focusing on Z. "I would appreciate a report, come with me if you would."
"I'm staying, Z and Carth can fill you in." Mission said, stepping off to the side to let Zaalbar past.
"You two stay," Carth said before anyone else could speak. "I'll handle it."
Z nodded in thanks and turned back to wait in patient silence. Mission took his big furry paw in her much smaller hand, drawing strength from her oldest and closest friend. She didn't pay any attention to Carth and Gadon's low voices, their footsteps fading down the corridor.
"He's going to be alright," Mission meant the words to come out as a statement, but they ended up sounding more like a question.
Z squeezed her hand in reassurance, "Yes," he said simply, complete confidence plain in his low rumbling growl. They waited together in silence watching and hoping while Dr. Carrin and the droid cauterized and sealed the wound. When they were finished the droid and Dr. Carrin's young Bothan assistant carefully lifted Rorick and carried him to a small Kolto tank in the corner of the room. They lowered him into the liquid and affixed a breath mask to his face before sealing him inside to recover.
Zaalbar gave her hand another squeeze, "Go rest Mission, there is nothing more we can do. I will wait with him." She looked up into his face intent on arguing, but she was so tired she merely nodded. Hugging him around his waist, she buried her face into the soft warm fur of his chest.
"Thanks Z," she mumbled, he wrapped an arm around her back giving her a comforting squeeze in return. "You are welcome little one, go now he will be well." he said, chest vibrating against her. She held on for another moment before releasing him and leaving the med bay, making her tired way to her small room in the base to rest.
...
My mind swam in muddled dreams for what seemed like forever, every once in a while I would rouse enough to feel warm fluid surrounding me completely, before falling back into the tortured darkness of my dreams. Visions of death, pain, betrayal, sorrow and above all- a looming sense of oppressive responsibility bordering on despair. I couldn't tell exactly what was hanging over my head, but there was something I had to do. Something so important that it was worth any sacrifice. Falling in and out of lucidity I wrestled with the feeling trying to remember what was behind the feeling, but every time I came close I would fall back into the dreams.
What felt like an eternity later I felt myself being jostled, then cool air and distant voices at the edge of my consciousness. The emotions around me felt calm and focused, reassuring in their business-like practicality. Guess I'm probably going to make it then. I thought before drifting back into dreams.
When I next stirred to consciousness I felt warm and comfortable. Soft, pleasant emotion drifted to me from across the room. Slowly and carefully I opened one eye and smiled unsurprised to see Mission sprawled at a small table in the corner of the room. Her head lay on her crossed arms, breathing deep and even, sound asleep. A tender emotion I couldn't remember feeling since childhood welled up inside me. I cared for her, I realized. Cared more deeply than should have been possible in only a couple of days- Really only one day that I had been conscious for. I felt connected to her; her emotions came clearly to me much more so than they had before I had collapsed. Yet, instead of being disturbed by the feeling it comforted me. Here was proof that no matter who I was, and despite all the horrible violent things I had done in the past, that I could still care for people. That those things hadn't broken me, I was still a person, not just a warrior or a killer.
Thinking of her brought my thoughts around the other woman in my life, and the horrible pain and fear I felt from her before I lost consciousness. Something else too, when the flash of pain came to me from Bastila, for I was quite sure now that somehow it was Bastila I kept sensing. I felt something snap free from her and flow back into me, I wasn't sure what it was, I wasn't sure of much of anything anymore. But she had definitely been drawing something from me when she was hurt. Then my own pain had slammed into me like a hammer blow, along with a bone deep weariness that had dropped me to my knees just as surely as the pain had. What had she been doing? The only explanation I could think of was that she was somehow pulling the force through me. Though I didn't even know if that was possible. Maybe it was some other arcane ability of the Jedi I had never heard of before. I didn't know anything about the force or how it worked. All I really did know, was that one underestimated a Jedi at their own peril.
Knowing that I wouldn't get any answers until I found her I reached deep within myself searching for her presence. I found it at once, her bundle of emotions clear like a beacon in the back of my mind. The connection felt much stronger than it had been when last I'd checked on her. She felt dull and muddled, almost like she was asleep, but not quite. Inspecting the emotions more closely I realized that she must have been drugged. It made sense, a normal person couldn't hope to keep a force user prisoner without denying them the Force. Drugs that could muddle a Jedi's mind badly enough to render them helpless while still leaving them conscious were rare and hard to get, but they did exist. Looking deeper I caught hints of fear and pain, but by far the strongest emotion was of frustration. I tried to push deeper, to connect with her, but she was too far gone to notice my attempts.
Sighing, I let that problem go for the time being, in favor of an over full bladder. I attempted to sit up, to which my side objected with extreme vigor. Grunting, I collapsed back in the bed and lifted the thin blanket to examine my traitorous flesh. A puckered red scar met my glare, utterly indifferent to my indignation. More than once in my life had I awoken in a hospital bed with a new scar, relying on nursing staff for the basic needs of life. I didn't enjoy it now, any more than I had then. Reluctantly, I let my pride go and decided that help would be needed.
"Mission," I croaked, barely more than a harsh whisper before clearing my throat and swallowed a couple times before I tried again. "Hey Mission." Her eyes opened, scanning the room in a daze before coming to rest on me. Waving, I gave her a small smile. "Hey there, guess I made it."
A huge grin split her face relief and joy blossomed inside her making my smile widen. She practically flew across the room and- before I could react- she was kissing me, gentle fingers cupping my face. Surprised and overwhelmed by the vehemence of the kiss and the emotion pouring off her, I kissed her back, returning her affection with an enthusiasm that surprised me more than the kiss. Her hands moved their way down over my bare chest and lower. She brushed her fingers gently over my new scar with a feathery soft touch before breaking the kiss to examine my nearly healed wound.
"Does it still hurt?" she asked, meeting my eyes, concern tinged with something much hotter burned in the air around us. I nodded, trying to shake the sudden lust that sprang up between us. "A bit, I'll probably need some help to the refresher."
"Of course, if you will promise me something." she said.
"What would that be." I asked, curious.
"You will promise to never scare me like that again." she said, emotions flashing from relief to remembered fear.
"Never again, if I can help it." I said with a half smile.
"Good enough." she said and kissed me again. It was probably meant to be quick and sweet, but despite ourselves it turned hot and needy. I pulled her close, ignoring the pain and my bladder, breathing in her scent and basking in her warm affection.
I finally broke the kiss when my bladder threatened embarrassing rebellion. "I really do need to use the refresher." I said gently grinning up at her.
She shook herself visibly, "Oh yeah, I got distracted...oops," She said, giving me a sheepish smile and stepping back, holding out her hands. "Come on I'll help you, give me your hands."
I reached out and took her hands bracing myself for the pain. She pulled me to a sitting position as carefully as possible. My side objected to the new state of affairs, nearly dropping me back onto the pillows. Gritting my teeth I stayed upright by a feat of will alone. I felt Mission's sympathy as though it were my own, a small part of my mind noting how much clearer her emotions were to my perception. The majority of my willpower was dedicated to climbing mount 'Stand without embarrassing myself', a treacherous peak indeed. Taking a deep breath, I braced myself on Mission's shoulders and managed to stand with her half supporting me. Taking a shaky breath, I stepped forward carefully leaning heavily on Mission. Working together taking one painful step after another we managed to make our way across the room. Sparing myself no indignity, I leaned on her gratefully while I relieved myself. When I finished after what felt like loosing all the rivers of Naboo in one sitting, she helped me back to bed. She situated me under the blanket with a practiced hand, like someone who had nursed the ill or injured more than once.
"You've done this before?" I asked, once she had me propped up as best she could with only two pillows.
"My brother got beaten half to death more than once," she said with a sad smile sitting on the edge of the bed. "You aren't that bad off, you made it to the refresher on your feet, and you didn't complain once. Model patient compared to Griff."
"Griff is your brother's name?" I asked, wiggling to try to get comfortable.
"Yeah," her expression grew distant for a moment, emotions roiling in sudden turmoil. Love, exasperation, worry, and anger flashed by in quick succession. "We came here when I was really young, young enough that I don't remember our parents at all. For as long as I can remember it's been me and Griff against the world."
"So you two were really close then?" I asked.
"Well we were, about a year ago Griff took off with some girl. Same line as always, 'I'll make it big sis, as soon as this 'opportunity' comes through I'll come back for you and we will finally be free of this planet." she said with massive air quotes and a heavy sense of disappointment. "It was just another scheme, how he kept deluding himself into believing they would ever work is beyond me."
"Some people want so desperately for things to change that they can't let go of the hope, no matter how miniscule that chance might be." I said, with sympathy.
"Yeah or they're just greedy as hell."
"Or that," I agreed wryly before continuing "I didn't know your brother but if it were mine, I would give him the benefit of the doubt." I said giving her hand a squeeze. She smiled sadly looking me over and returned the squeeze.
"Thanks," she paused looking for words, "I love him, he took care of me my whole life. He was more like a goofy dad than a brother to me. It just hurts that he left me here and ran off with that slut."
"Feeling abandoned is something I can sympathize with," I looked down at our hands, trying to decide if I wanted to continue.
"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." she said gently, squeezing my hand again. I did want to tell her and more surprisingly, I trusted her. So I met her eyes, took a deep breath and pushed forward.
"My dad died, when I was really young. I only have a handful of memories of him. My mother did her best, but we eventually ended up on the street for a while. I know it wasn't my dad's fault, but it damn sure felt like it at the time. Like he left us to suffer alone."
"Yeah, then you feel guilty afterwards which just makes everything worse." she said with a rueful grin.
"Only a little." I said. "But I moved past it, mom and I did okay, despite the rough start."
"Is your mom still alive?" she asked, scooting closer.
"Alive and well, on Naboo with a successful design business. Making computer generated images for advertising and such." I said, allowing a bit of pride into my voice. "Mom really turned our lives around with nothing more than determination and force of will."
"I'm impressed, going from homeless to a business owner, that must be quite the story." she said.
"It is. One that I wouldn't mind telling when I'm not so exhausted." I said stifling a yawn.
"Oh, of course," she said getting to her feet. "But you should eat something before you go back to sleep. I'll go get you something, be right back."
I watched her leave the room, paying special attention to her form fitting black pants. She was possibly the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. She had obviously been through alot, and was extremely dangerous; But she was also loyal and kind, I could do much worse. We both had lived hard, violent lives, filled with pain, but that just made us understand each other in a way not many could. I closed my eyes, imagining Mission naked, and sweating in my arms, entertaining the fantasy until sleep claimed me once more.
The next time I woke, Mission was gone and Carth was sitting at the small table reading intently from a datapad in his hand. A covered plate sat on the table in front of him. Feeling a pang of disappointment that it wasn't Mission, I tried to sit up and just barely managed it with a groan.
"Oh good you're alive," Carth said, grinning and setting down the pad. "It wasn't a sure thing there for a while, glad you made it." For Carth it was practically a weeping admission of fear for my life.
"It didn't feel very good at the time, I can tell you that." I chuckled wryly.
"I bet," he said, uncovering the tray. "Well I might not be a hot young girl, but I did bring you food."
"I love you." I said, straight faced. Hunger gnawed at me from within so intense it made me feel ill.
"I know, I am the best," he said coming over to the bed with the plate. "You won't be the last to fall before my charms."
I laughed despite myself, and only let out a small moan when my side protested mildly. He pulled over a hospital serving tray and set the food down grinning.
"Not quite a hundred percent yet, huh?" he asked.
"No, but the pain isn't as bad." I said digging into the food.
"The Doc thinks that the med foam held just long enough for you to get back, before the internal bleeding washed it out. Though in my experience, med foam lasts a lot longer than thirty minutes. Hell, I once saw a man march on a wounded leg for three days before we had to reapply the stuff…" he said letting the words trail off, fishing for an explanation.
"I'm not entirely sure, but my theory would be the Force had something to do with it." I wasn't ready to share my connection with Bastila, not while I didn't know all the details myself yet. I needed to talk to her in person so I could finally get to the bottom of whatever was happening to me. Carth gave me a suspicious look, but decided not to push the matter.
"Well I'll leave you to eat then, just wanted to see how you were doing." he said, standing.
"Thanks Carth, the food is 'muth apeetheeated" I garbled out around a mouthful of potato.
"Come on, that's disgusting." he said, making a face.
"Starving." I said, swallowing.
"Obviously, I'll let Mission know you're alive. She was not overly pleased that you passed out before she could feed you." he said, with a wink and walked out.
"Wow is it that obvious?" I said, softly munching away. I had just finished the meal and flopped back when Mission entered. She stopped in the doorway watching me rub my over full stomach. She raised a brow in question.
"Oh so you'll stay awake to eat when Carth feeds you?" she asked, I couldn't tell if she was joking or not. I opened my mouth, about to say something I would probably regret when I thought better of it. I shrugged instead.
"I was hungry." Fortunately she grinned and flopped down on the bed next to me.
"I'm joking."
I let out a nervous chuckle, "Of course, I knew that."
"Despite how I may appear, I'm not unreasonable." her grin was wide and happy. The emotion flowing off of her was full of relief and joy.
"I take it from your emotions that I look better?" I asked, grinning back.
"Yes, much better. How do you feel?"
"Pretty good actually, my side is still sore. But it's not that bad, I'll be back to normal in a few days I think."
"Feel good enough to take a walk?" she asked, her smile, bright and happy. Just being around her made all my fear melt away. With her there I could think about something other than going crazy, or the far worse possibility.
"Yeah I think that would be good for me." I said tossing back the blanket, completely unconcerned by my nakedness. I stood, going slow to make sure my body could handle it. I was a bit shaky but good enough for a walk, if I went slow. I turned to see Mission staring appreciatively. "Well I suppose I could go like this if you really wanted." I said with a satisfied grin.
"Ha! Let's not and say we didn't, I don't want you to get mobbed." she said, and came around the bed to run a finger down my chest. "Not while you aren't in a fit state to defend yourself." her smile was suggestive and playful, challenging me.
I bent to kiss her, not bothering to think. Her soft lips opened to me at once, her arms going around my neck. I pulled her against my chest, running my hands up her back. Exploring her mouth, learning every inch, feeling her burning desire beating against my mind- it was intoxicating. Her taste, her soft, sweet scent, her soft gasp when I ran my hand up her side brushing her breast.
"You sure about this? We could just go for a walk." I asked, without breaking the kiss.
"What, don't think you have the stamina?" she said, smiling against my lips.
"Not sure, but I'll do my damnedest." I said, lifting her and laying her back on the bed. Fortunately, my body seemed to be on board with the plan and I managed it with little effort. The endurance of a man about to have sex was a thing of legend. No matter how sick or exhausted, junior was always up to giving it a shot.
Her soft, elastic leggings slid down easily, leaving her soft blue flesh bare to my gaze. She pulled her shirt over her head and tossed it carelessly off the bed. A soft growl escaped me before I could stifle it and she arched up; her fingers stroking up her inner thigh with a predatory smile.
"You going to do something about it, or just stand there?" she asked, breathing harshly as she dipped her fingers into her slick core. I knelt between her legs and nudged her hand out of my way. Without pausing, I leaned in and tasted her, savoring her surprising sweetness. I let out a surprised 'huh' and went back in again. Mission at once giggled, then gasped.
"Never been with a Twi'lek before?" she asked, through her harsh breaths.
"No, you're the first." I said, bending in again. Her visceral sound of pleasure was immensely satisfying. "You taste incredible." I said coming up for air.
"Pheromones, the better the taste, the higher the compatibility for reproduction. A quirk of our biology." she said, sounding immensely satisfied. I froze mid lick, looking up I caught her eyes and raised a brow in question. She grinned down at me, "We can't have children without some light gene therapy, no need to panic."
"Don't take it the wrong way," I said, feeling slightly foolish.
"Not at all," she said, cutting me off, "I'm not ready for kids, I understand." Feeling only amusement and arousal in her emotions, I smiled and leaned in once more.
I took my time drawing out every motion of my lips and tongue, until tortured cries filled the room. Mission's high, clear voice begging me to stop teasing her. I complied, finding her clit and lavishing it with attention. Faster and faster before pulling back just before she came. Able as I was to feel her emotions almost as clearly as my own, I brought her to the edge with ease, again and again. When she was nothing more than a moaning puddle I finally pushed her over the edge, cherishing the cry from the pleasure exploding inside her. The feeling of her climax washing over me nearly brought me to my own. Overwhelmed with the sensation, I collapsed between her thighs breathing heavily and blinking like a dazed animal.
"That was incredible," she said, still breathing hard.
"It really was."
"Really?" she asked, sounding a bit confused.
"I could feel your pleasure," I said, trying to make sense of the experience. "It was incredible, and a bit overwhelming."
"Wow, that's amazing!" she propped herself up on an elbow to look down at me. "Did you cum?" she asked, sounding more than a bit amused.
"No, but it felt kind of like cumming." It's all I could come up with.
"Okay, all men should have the force," she said and stroked her fingers through my hair. "That was the best first time ever."
"First time?"
"First time with a new person is never as good as the second." she explained, grinning.
"Well glad you enjoyed yourself," I said, grinning up at her. "My turn." Her eyes widened as I leapt up onto the bed. I pinned her arms above her head and kissed her. Letting out a deep moan, she wrapped her legs around my hips and pulled me closer. Positioning myself carefully, I pressed inside her. The feel of her was so incredible it made me break the kiss with a moan. She gasped and thrust up to meet me.
The experience was indescribable, her emotions and pleasure intertwining with mine. I was so overwhelmed that before I knew it, I was pounding into her with abandon. She cried my name, arching up to give me a better angle to go even deeper. Faster and faster; hot, sweating bodies wrapped around one another- racing each other to the finish. When it came, we both let out shuddering cries; riding the wave until we crashed together in a boneless heap on the bed. We laid there entwined in each other's arms for a long time, letting our breathing calm and the shaking stop.
"Wow." I said, dumbly.
"Yeah." she said, giggling and leaning in to kiss me sweetly with a huge smile. "You could say that."
"I suppose I should have asked earlier, but why me? We barely know each other." I asked. She rested her head on my chest tracing her fingers over my numerous scars.
"I know enough. You're intelligent, driven, brave, passionate," she paused to kiss my stomach and grin up at me before continuing. "But more than anything you're loyal, and you value the people around you. It doesn't hurt that you're pretty either."
"Hah," I said chuckling. "Never been called pretty before."
"Really?" she asked, a little satisfaction flashing through her emotions. "You're a very attractive man, someone must have said something."
"I've been in the military since the day I was old enough to join up. Never really had the time or inclination to have a long term relationship. When you can be shipped off half way across the Galaxy, or killed at any time… Well, I never felt comfortable with the idea of asking for more than a single night." I explained, stroking my hand up and down her soft, warm back, drinking in the feel of her.
Her violet eyes looked up at me; flashing with determination. "Don't let that fear eat at you, I'll be very irritated if you bug out on me now." she said, trying to hide uncertainty behind bluster. But I could feel her fear, fear of being abandoned by another person she cared about. Our fears mirrored each other, I was afraid of being taken from anyone who cared for me, and she feared being left behind. Wanting to comfort her, I leaned in and kissed her softly, savoring the contact for a long moment, just enjoying the connection to another person.
"I won't leave unless you ask me too." I said, breaking the kiss.
"Good." she said, smiling before laying her head back down. "Do you know how you survived?" she asked, so softly I barely heard the words.
"The stab wound?"
"Yes."
"Not buying that the foam bought me time, huh?"
"Dr. Carrin didn't find any sealant foam in your lung. If it had sealed your lung there would have been foam around the inside of the wound." she said, tracing circles on my chest with her finger tips. She didn't look at me and I could feel trepidation leaking out of her. "Can you use the Force? I mean you feel emotions so you have to be Force sensitive, but according to Carrin you should have bled out. So can you use it consciously? Are you a Jedi?" she said, picking up speed until the last few words were nearly a squeak.
I sighed deeply, I didn't know exactly what was going on, but I was sure that Mission cared about me. And that keeping my strange connection to Bastila would come back to bite me eventually. Making a decision, and hoping for the best, I spoke. I told her about my dreams; About the man in black on the bridge of the dreadnought and his fight with the Jedi. About the scar on my back that matched the Dark Lord's injury, and time slowing down in the Undercity tunnels. Last, I told her about my connection to Bastila, about hearing her voice in my head, and feeling her pain before my wound reopened in the speeder bay.
"Is that even possible, how would that work? I mean how could they change someone's personality?" She asked propping herself up on one arm to look me in the eye.
"That's assuming I'm not simply crazy."
"Yes, assuming you aren't crazy, assuming you were a Jedi or whatever, how would they do it?" she asked, looking intent like someone with a new and intricate puzzle.
"I don't really care how, I just care if it's real." I said, looking up at the ceiling, unable to hold her gaze. "If it's real then everything I know, all my memories are fake. If it's real, I'm a monster." I uttered the last at barely above a whisper.
"No, don't give me that." she said vehemently, pressing a hand to my cheek and forcing me to meet her eyes. "You aren't a monster, you rescued me from Rakghouls without thought for yourself. Then instead of trying to force me to help you, you went out of your way and put yourself in danger again to save Z. Taking on half the Undercity in the process. You are not a monster, whatever you were before, that's not what you are now." complete confidence emanated off of her in waves. I would believe her or there would be consequences. Seeing her there, all five foot four her, naked half on top of me, and staring me down. It made me smile, just as much from gratitude as amusement.
I hugged her to me, "Thank you, I didn't realize how much I needed to hear that." I said, kissing the top of her head. She hugged me back and nodded into my chest. "Do you really believe me?"
She pulled back, "Yes, I believe you. It's the least I owe you, and Z trusts you. He said you, 'Smell honorable', which for him is extremely high praise. And in all the time I have known him he's never been wrong about a person." she said, grinning. "It does sound a little far fetched though, I won't lie to you."
"I know it does, if I wasn't able to feel emotions, slow down time, and have magic scars that match my dreams I would have completely dismissed the whole thing." I said.
"If it's all real I want to know how they did it."
"I think Bastila might know." I said, "I felt fear from her, directed at me. If I was just a soldier, she would have no reason to fear me. I'm sure she knows something, the sooner I rescue her, the sooner I get some answers."
"The sooner 'we' get answers," she corrected, kissing a scar on my chest. "Like it or not, you aren't alone anymore. Zaalbar will never abandon you, and as for me well, the sex is way too good to give up." she said, with a huge grin.
Letting out a bark of laughter I shook my head. "Well then, I could never get between a woman and an orgasm."
"That's more like it," she said with a laugh of her own. "Glad I don't have to twist your arm about it."
"Though the responsibility is a heavy one, I'm willing to make the sacrifice." I said, with all the faux gravitas I could muster.
"Ass!" she said, laughing and smacking my chest.
"I do have one of those yes, and so do you." I said, giving that ass a playful smack. The smack turned into a squeeze, which became stroking. Her eyes lit, a suggestive smile taking over her face, and that was the end of talking for a while.
When we fell to the bed once more, panting and completely spent, I felt more satisfied than I could ever remember being. She turned and snuggled back into me, I slid and arm around her and cupped her breast relaxing into her. Letting out a happy sigh, she radiated contentment.
"What do we do next?" she asked, into the peaceful silence.
"I'm not sure," I said, pausing to think. "Gadon thinks that Brejik will put Bastila up as the prize for the season opener. So winning that race is the only thing I can think of right now. We don't have the manpower to search for her. We have to hope that Gadon is right and Brejik will bring her to us."
"What do we do if he doesn't?" she asked softly.
"I have no idea, I suppose I could go directly to the Jedi, or the Sith for answers. But I don't think either of those options are very good ones." I said with a sigh. "Not to mention the effects it would have on the moral of the Republic. Bastila is the poster child for the war effort. Apparently she can influence the outcome of entire battles with one of her abilities. As this war heats up I think she could be vital." I paused to look her in the eyes. "Until I'm told otherwise, I have to operate under the assumption that I'm still a member of the Republic military. My mission was to protect and advise Bastila and the Jedi with her. I have to rescue her if I can. We just have to go through with this and hope for the best. I'll think of something if it doesn't work."
She sighed deeply, snuggling closer. "Yeah that's about what I thought. Oh well can't blame a girl for trying."
"You don't have to help me," I kissed the back of her neck before continuing. "I'm grateful for your help, but if you would rather stay out of it I completely understand."
"No," she said, squeezing my arm. "I appreciate the offer, but I'm in. I meant it when I said you were stuck with me. I'm not going to fold now, just when things are really getting interesting."
"Thank you." I said softly, not really sure what to say.
"You're welcome," she said warmly, then paused and cocked her head thinking. "Can you feel her right now?"
I searched within and found Bastila's mind instantly, every time I looked for her it grew easier. She was sleeping, calm and tranquil, no obvious pain, or fear. "Yes." I responded.
"How is she, can you tell?" she asked, intrigued.
"I think she is sleeping, probably heavily drugged."
"Makes sense," she was about to say more when her comlink beeped from the side of the bed. "Nooooo." she groaned. It beeped again, and she buried her face in the pillow. "Come on!" she cried, the sound muffled by the pillow. It beeped again. "Fine! But it had better be important." she mumbled, rolling to the side of the bed and reaching down, her lekku twitched irritably "I swear by all that's good, if it's just Carrin asking if he's awake…" the silent words cut off abruptly as she looked at the screen. "Shit." she said aloud, shock plain on her face.
"What is it?" I asked, rolling over to look over her shoulder.
"Kirin, our swoop pilot was just found dead." she said, looking over her shoulder at me as I quickly scanned the message.
"They cut off his head?" I asked, rereading the text, just to be sure.
"This is bad." Mission said, staring off into space. "We don't have anyone else that was familiar with the prototype accelerator."
"No one else knows how to get it working?" I asked in disbelief. I couldn't believe Gadon wouldn't have a back up plan.
"No getting it installed isn't a problem, it's actually flying the thing. It's more like piloting a fighter than a speeder. No one else was trained." she explained.
"You're kidding?" I asked, feeling a pit in my stomach.
"No, we just built the prototype, we only had it for a couple weeks before it was stolen. We didn't have enough time to train more than one person to fly it. Not to mention most people don't have fast enough reaction speed to pilot it anyway." she said, sadness and resignation filling her emotions.
"How much time do we have before the season opener?" I asked.
"Two days." she said, and looked down at her comlink.
I mulled the problem over, considering our options. But I couldn't think of any possible way to find Bastila in such a short time. So there was only one thing to do.
"Call Carth and tell him to meet us at Gadon's office, I have an idea." I said, getting out of bed.
…..
Carth and Zaalbar were waiting for us as we approached Gadon's office. "You heard about the pilot?" he asked.
"Yes," I said grimly. "We need to know what Gadon plans to do. I thought about it, but I can't see another way to get to Bastila in time."
"Yeah not in two days." he said, knocking on Gadon's door.
Zaalbar leaned in and sniffed the air around Mission, giving her a disapproving frown. "Mission, you said you would wait until he was fully recovered." the big Wookiee chided. Mission's face turned a lovely shade of purple, blushing fiercely.
"I told you." Carth said with a smirk.
"Did you get a translator?" I asked, ignoring the byplay.
"Sure did." Carth replied, pointing to his left ear. "Mission does good work when she's not…"
He trailed off when we heard Gadon's voice from inside the office. "Come."
"Don't be too hard on her Z, she was gentle." I said, grinning at Mission as I opened the door, cutting off any reply she might have had. She just glared at me, I could feel amusement and irritation radiating from her as I stepped into the office.
"Good you're here." Gadon said, looking up to watch us file in. "How are you feeling?" he asked.
"Much better thank you." I said. Gadon nodded in reply while I took a seat in front of his desk. I nearly fell out of it when Mission plopped down in my lap like she owned it. She got comfortable and patted my knee without looking back at me. "Get used to it." She said, with her Lekku, practically oozing smug satisfaction. I resisted the urge to pinch her butt, there would be time for revenge.
Gadon's brows rose in surprise watching Mission, but just gave us a small amused smile. "As I'm sure you have heard by now, I won't be able to fulfill my promise of assistance." he said, his smile fading. "With Kirin's death I don't have anyone else that would be safe to operate the prototype, better yet actually win."
"I'm sorry about your man." I said, somberly.
"Thank you, he was a difficult man, but he didn't deserve what they did to him." Gadon said.
"Was it retaliation for our raid?" Mission asked.
"I believe so, he was killed about 12 hours after your attack. Brejik took a gamble that we wouldn't be able to run the prototype without Kirin, and he was right, damn him." Gadon eyes blazed with anger, murder clear in his cold machine orbs.
"I'll take his place." I said.
"No!" everyone in the room said in near unison. I just sat staring at Mission, who had turned to glare daggers at me. "You aren't fully recovered, it would be foolish for you to do it. Even if you were at your best, humans don't have reaction times fast enough to deal with the speed." she said in a very reasonable tone, despite the glare.
"She's right son, Kirin had several thousand credits worth of wetware implants to decrease his reaction times. And a neural interface to connect directly to the Swoop. You aren't capable I'm afraid." Gadon said, sounding regretful. I was about to object when Carth spoke up.
"He can't do it, but I can." he said grimly. "I'm a fighter pilot, rated to fly everything in the republic navy. And no matter how fast those things are they aren't as fast as an Aurek Strikefighter."
"It's not just the speed, Swoop racing is a high speed obstacle course. Blind turns, traps, metal struts jutting up out of the track. It's deadly, there's a good reason why you don't see many human pilots." Mission said, desperately.
"No worse than being chased through the interior of a shredded Dreadnought." Carth said calmly. "I have the same kind of implants that swoop pilots use, mine are probably better than most. And frankly right now, I'm our only option. So who wants to waste time arguing, and who wants to help me get this done?" he said, staring us down. I couldn't argue with him, I could probably do it if I could figure out how I slowed down time. But since I had no idea how I had done it, or if it was possible to do it again. I couldn't even be sure I would survive the race, better yet win.
"You sure?" I asked.
"Yes."
"Then let's get to work." I said, and got shakely to my feet. Only a few minutes out of bed and I was already getting tired.
"They will get to work, you will go back to bed." Mission said standing and taking my arm. "Even if I have to drag you there."
"Yes that is what I meant, of course." I said, my sarcasm was undercut by how much I needed Mission's support.
"Good, Nice to see a man who actually recognizes when he is injured." she finished in Ryl, her Lekku twitching with sharp, quick motions.
"It comes with the job," I explained as we made our way slowly back to my room. "When you get injured as often as I do, you quickly come to terms with what your body can handle. Pushing yourself past that only worsens the injury."
"Do you think Carth can do it?" she asked, changing the subject. Trepidation permeated the air around her.
"Why do you think he can't?"
"I never said that!" she snapped defensively.
"I feel emotion, remember?"
She sighed, keeping her silence for a moment as we walked. "I have seen hundreds of races, you know how many humans I have seen make it across the finish line alive?" she said breaking her silence.
"Not many."
"One." she said looking up at me. "Damon Thull, a man with so much wet wiring he was disqualified from the last season opener for having too many implants. He is the only human I have ever seen survive a swoop race."
"Carth will make it." I said, with a bone deep confidence.
"You really believe that." she said surprised.
"I have no doubt. He is going to win."
We walked the rest of the way in silence contemplating our own thoughts. When we got to my room, Mission helped me out of my clothes then without a word she stripped completely, crawled into the bed and snuggled into my side. I wrapped my arm around her and let out a deep contented sigh.
"So it's like this now, huh?" I asked with a smirk.
"Are you complaining?"
"Nope, just curious."
"Good, because I'm exhausted and you're comfy." she snuggled closer and kissed my cheek. "I haven't been sleeping well."
"It means a lot that you worried about me. Been a long time since anyone has."
"On Ryloth we call this Soressi Ythuura." she said, sounding sleepy.
I thought about the phrase for a moment, "Perfect attraction?" I asked, sure I sounded confused.
"That's the literal translation, but it's deeper than that." she thought about it for a second before continuing. "It's when you find someone that you connect with immediately."
"Love at first sight?" I asked, still sounding confused. Our connection was deep considering the amount of time we had known each other, but I wouldn't have called it love at first sight.
"No, we don't believe in love at first sight, but in a way, it's deeper than that. It can be romantic or just a friendship, but the connection is always strong. Sometimes people meet and they just fit together, that connection is Soressi Ythuura." she explained.
"Yes." I said, understanding. "I would never have admitted it on my own, but it feels right."
"Why not?" she perked up, interested.
"You're a bit young for me, and we have only known each other for a few days." I said, embarrassed.
She chuckled with amusement. "Humans get caught up on age and convention more than we do. For us, when we feel a connection we go for it, you will never know unless you try."
"Yeah I suppose you're right, doesn't hurt that you're absurdly attractive." I said, with a grin.
"Good to know I haven't lost my touch." she said with a giggle.
I kissed the top of her head and closed my eyes relishing the feeling of her against me. It had been a long time and it felt wonderful to hold her. Feeling completely relaxed and content for the first time in as long as I could remember, I drifted off.
...
That night the dreams came, dreams that felt too real. Past, present, future tumbling through my consciousness. Bastila writhing in pain in a cramped, dark room. Massive space battles, hooded figures dueling in a sandblasted valley of red stone.
Warm pleasure pulled me from the dreams, I woke slowly to find Mission taking me deep into her mouth. I groaned deep in my throat and thrust up to meet her.
She pulled back and met my eyes. "Oh good you're awake." she said with a huge grin as she straddled my hips.
Nearly an hour later we fell apart, panting for breath and completely satisfied. Feeling much better than I had the day before, I climbed from the bed and stretched carefully. Nothing but minor stiffness greeted me. I was definitely healing faster than I used to. We showered, dressed, then headed out.
The day passed swiftly, I spent it helping where I could, getting things ready for the race. Then when I was gently told to get out of the way by the lead engineer, I did some mild exercises to test my body, and surfed the planetary net for updates on the Sith or the Vulkars. Other than reports on the explosion, the whole net seemed to be revolving around the coming swoop race. Taris took the sport very seriously it seemed. Every major news outlet and most of the minor ones were completely focused on it. The story of Kirin's death was everywhere. The Bek's pilot was very popular, and though no one out right said it most of the stories implied that the Vulkars were behind it. Public sentiment seemed completely against them, which could only be a good thing for us. Still my confidence in Carth from the day before was shaken slightly by the numerous reels of crash footage being shared around. It didn't help that so many of the crashes had been human pilots, 215-350 millisecond average reaction time just wasn't fast enough. Sure some humans could get that down to the 150s but even that didn't seem fast enough.
I didn't see much of my team that day, Carth was on a simulator getting familiar with the swoop, Mission was helping with the swoops electronics and Z was stress testing the prototype accelerator. Everyone but me had a job to do, I had a very particular set of skills, and none of them were particularly useful in advanced engineering.
I wandered the base, mindlessly exploring, when I came across the training room I did a light workout with weights to test my body. About halfway through, I felt myself start to drag and I instinctively reached for the light at the center of my being. I felt a burst of energy suffuse my body the moment I touched it, exhausted limbs stopped shaking, my breathing calmed, I even stopped sweating. Feeling intrigued more than frightened I pushed myself harder, but no matter what I did, as long as I was holding onto the light in my mind, I felt no more strain than taking a walk. I had heard stories of Jedi being able to fight for days on end with no sleep. Feeling the power fill my body as I worked, I could believe it.
When I finished I headed back to my room, took a quick shower and on and curiosity got the best of me. I sat cross legged on the floor. I got comfortable and closed my eyes letting my mind wander as I reached for the light. It flooded me easily, filling me to bursting. With conscious effort I dialed it back to a manageable level, and focused on my breathing. The meditation felt so familiar, like I had done it a thousand times before.
Breathing slowly I focused on Mission and let the power flow through me and out. I felt a shift in my perception like being carried in a swift river. Then I could feel her right next to me, as though I were standing right behind her. I could feel her emotions vividly, frustration and excitement as she worked on the code for the swoop. I reached out, Imagined laying a hand on her shoulder. I felt her start, surprise flared around her, a foggy image of her jerking upright and looking around materialized in my mind.
'Rorick?' She said, as though through water, and inside my mind at the same time.
My eyes snapped open and I was once again sitting on the floor in my room, something near panic gripped my throat. I let go of the light, thrusting the power away from me. "What is happening to me?" I said, over a choked sob.
I sat there leaning against the bed, head in my hands crying like a child. I didn't even notice the door open a few minutes later. Soft comforting arms went around me, feeling Mission's presence I didn't bother to look up or even try to stop the tears.
"I felt you." she said, softly into my hair. "I can't explain it but I knew something was wrong." she sounded so kind and caring, it made me cry harder. "I'm here," she said, kissing the top of my head and pulling me closer. "No matter what's wrong, I'm here, you aren't alone."
"I don't, know- what's hap-happening to me." My words came out choppy past the sobs.
"You're Force sensitive, it's the Force manifesting inside you." she said, stroking my hair.
"If that's all it was, I wouldn't be having a breakdown." I said, managing to calm myself some.
"You can't let the other stuff get to you like this," she said stroking my hair. "No matter what happened to you, or who you were, what matters is here and now. You can't do anything about the visions right now."
"Knowing that I might be a monster is tearing me up inside, it goes against everything I have ever believed in." I said, managing to speak clearly, though the tears still fell.
"When I was younger, Revan came to Taris, did you know that?" she asked.
"I'm not sure, it sounds familiar."
"He came here with a number of Jedi, trying to tell people how important it was to stand against the Mandalorians. Asking for volunteers for his relief corp." she smiled sadly thinking back. "No one listened, the Mando's were only a few planets away causing chaos, but no one cared. You know what he did?" she asked.
"What?" I was entranced by the story.
"Instead of leaving us to our fate like we deserved, he broke up the slave ring here on Taris. Saved thousands of people from slavery, and killed dozens of aweful men who profited off the suffering of others." she tilted my head up to meet her eyes. "Even if you are Revan, there is just as much good in his past as bad. If somehow it's true and you're Revan we'll deal with it. You are good, deep inside, don't let fear of the unknown rip you apart."
She kissed me with care, and compassion, completely unconcerned about my past one way or another. There was no hint of judgement or fear in her emotions, she didn't care who I was before we met, only who was right then. The acceptance brought my world into focus. She was right. I couldn't change anything about the past, there was no point in driving myself crazy about it. If I was Revan all I could do was work towards the future and attempt to atone for what I had done.
I pulled back and gave her a grateful smile, "Thank you."
Her smile was bright, "You're welcome." she said and kissed me again.
We ended up in bed holding each other. We were both completely relaxed and comfortable together. She told me about her brother, her life on the streets. Finding Zaalbar and their adventures together. Meeting the group of Jedi that came with Revan to Taris, after he gave a speech to the people of the Lower City. The loss she felt when her Force sensitive friend left with the Jedi to fight the Mandolorians. I told her about my early life with my mother on the streets, how she pulled us up from nothing, and eventually started her business. Military training, the planets I visited, battles I fought. We talked for hours, just laying there holding each other, talking about everything, letting one topic move to the next late into the evening.
When the door chimed it brought us back to the present. "Come." I said, sitting up.
Carth entered looking tired but excited. He looked us over for a moment and smiled. "Sorry to interrupt, but Gaddon wants us for a briefing."
I looked back at Mission and held out my hand, "Thank you, this really helped." I said.
She gave me a bright smile and took my hand letting me pull her to her feet. "You're welcome, I'm glad you feel better." she said, and stood on tiptoe to kiss me sweetly. "Now let's go, it's time to make a plan." she said, pulling back.
The three of us walked together in companionable silence, Mission leading the way to the large briefing room. Gadon, Zaerdra, Zaalbar, and a grease stained engineer were already sitting at the large conference table.
"Good, thank you for coming," Gadon said motioning for us to sit. "We need to go over the plan for tomorrow." We took empty seats and waited for him to continue.
"Because of the importance of his prisoner, I doubt Brejik will let her go if you win." he said motioning to Carth. "He will likely claim you cheated, or that she isn't his to give away. Whatever he claims we need to be ready to take her by force."
"What if he doesn't bring her tomorrow?" I asked.
"He has too," Gadon replied, "He announced her as part of their entrance fee, a few hours ago. If he doesn't bring her now he won't be allowed to enter the race. She will be held in a stasis cage in their pit area. The rules dictate that pit crews can be a maximum of five members. So your opposition shouldn't be too intense." He paused motioning to the engineer. She was short, blond and cute under the grease, with a stocky build. The same one that had kicked me out of the shop earlier that day.
"I need to be there in case anything goes wrong with the swoop." the blond engineer said. "Zaalbar and Mission can assist me, but I'm the only one that knows the technology well enough to fix the swoop if something goes wrong."
"Well that lined up perfectly, a maximum of five members and you make five." Carth said with a grin.
"What about weapons?" I asked.
"None allowed," Gadon said, "Two armed guards to keep the peace, and cameras, no other security in the pit. Everything is scanned on the way in, if anything bigger than a pocket knife is found it's confiscated and destroyed."
"What about broken down hold out blasters?" Carth asked, "They are designed to get past those scans."
"Yes we have two packed into our equipment, and I'm sure the Vulkars will have them as well." the short engineer interjected.
"That will have to be good enough." Carth said, not looking particularly happy about it.
"The race will consist of two heats in the morning to decide rankings then the race itself in the afternoon. Win or lose you need to be prepared to take the Jedi by force. If you win, I would suggest waiting until Brejik reneges to take action. That will put public sentiment firmly behind us. Davik might even do your job for you. Swoop racing is a major income stream for the exchange and they take it very seriously." Gadon explained.
"And if we don't win?" I asked.
"If you don't win, when you take Bastila, you make an enemy of the Exchange, the Sith, the Vulkars, and us," Gadon said gravely, "I will denounce your actions and our people will do everything in our power to hunt you down. If we don't, the exchange will destroy us utterly."
"Better not lose then." Carth said, leaning back in his chair.
"Indeed," Gadon replied.
We went over the final details and broke up for the night. We said good night to Z and Carth then Mission and I went back to my room. We showered, made love and fell asleep in each other's arms. For the first time in what felt like forever, I had deep, dreamless sleep.