The sudden pain of landing was what hit Cat first. The way it jostled her, the way it felt like the impact was vibrating through her bones - that was what she registered first.

Second, were the goblins.

The goblins should have probably been the first thing, in all honesty, that Cat noticed, but she was too busy hoping that she hadn't broken anything in the fall. She along with the Company were jostled to their feet, and Cat saw a shimmering blue out the corner of her eye - too small to be Sting. The ring, she realised with a start, that her brother had given Kili. So it did work like an elven weapon, glowing to alert them to the presence of orcs and goblins.

It would have been worthy to have known that before the capture, but better late than never, she supposed.

They put up a fight, almost instinctively, against the goblins as they tried to herd them deeper into the caves, and Cat soon found out that, yes, kicking them between the legs did hurt them. Her best weapon was secure - the ability to fight dirty and not give a shit about dignity or honour. Maybe later she'd care, but right now she didn't want their grubby little hands touching her. It seemed the dwarves felt the same, once realising that fighting wasn't going to work for now at least, and grouped themselves so she was bracketed by Dwalin, their best fighter, and Nori, who seemed to always end up by her side if Bilbo wasn't there.

Speaking of which, she glanced behind her, catching sight of wide, green eyes and golden curls peeking above a barricade at the group. She managed to flash a wink, before yelping when one of the goblins shoved her, nearly knocking her to the ground. That earned an outraged cry from Dwalin, who resumed his struggling fight with vigour. Cat never knew he cared, and despite the dire situation they were in, felt a little warm at it.

"Stay close to us." Nori's words were a breath, and his fingers brushed against hers in a quiet reassurance. "We won't let them lay their hands on you."

"I can look after myself." She breathed back. "Keep an eye on your brother and Kili...and thanks." Nori didn't question her, but merely nodded, wincing when Dwalin was herded back to the group and sporting a black eye.

"Nice shiner."

"Shut it." Dwalin's voice was a growl, and he cast a look at Cat who merely nodded her thanks. They kept moving, side by side, Cat's eyes focused ahead and on her brother, who was walking alongside Kili. She could barely see the blue glow of his ring amongst the horde of goblins, but knew it would be there. She suspected that Caleb and Kili's fingers would be locked together, both in comfort and so that they would not be parted as they were jostled over bridges and along pathways.

Cat tried not to think about the open air between her feet and the bottom of the cavern - she knew what lurked down there, and she wouldn't be able to face Gollum at the risk of changing things drastically and risking her brave little hobbit in the process. If she survived the fall, that is, and she wasn't willing to risk her life in such a foolish move. Rather stay up here, with her dwarves and her brother, and stall until Gandalf showed up, late as usual.

Or, as Gandalf would say, precisely when he meant to arrive. Cat should use that whenever she was running late, but somehow thought no one would buy that excuse.

It also hadn't escaped Cat's notice that she began referring to the company as hers. Her dwarves and her hobbit and her brother. They were hers, and Cat didn't like it when people hurt those she considered at the very least friends. It was a startling revelation, to realise that she would gladly go toe to toe with any being that so much as looked at her company funny. Maybe not Thranduil - purely because she would like to avoid a stint in prison - but anyone else was fair game in her opinion.

The thing about Goblin Town was that they were singing, and it was horribly off key. Not to mention the lyrics were horrible, even if the tune itself was surprisingly jaunty. She knew very well she would end up humming it at a later point, and immediately hated that realisation. There were so many other songs to choose from, if not from Arda then from home, and the stupid Goblin Town song would definitely end up being the one she'd hum while travelling.

God, she hated goblins.

Even though she knew exactly what to expect when it came to the goblin king, she still felt the instinctive desire to retch at the sight of him, of the smell. None of the goblins were nice to look at, but the king was the biggest and most repulsive - probably why he was chosen as their leader. Not the smartest, goblins, but it was the only reason Cat could fathom as to why this...thing would be a leader, considering the fact he definitely did not feel bad about killing his 'subjects'. Cat knew what made a good leader - as much as she clashed with Thorin, she knew he wouldn't dream of truly hurting any of the company, and he commanded respect in a way that Cat couldn't help but find amazing. Now there was a leader, and one she was gladly following...though not literally. As good as he was, Thorin's sense of direction was abysmal.

Looking at the goblin king, though she really, really didn't want to, Cat had to force down the thought of 'scrotum beard' before she started laughing because it did look like that - of course, one heavily infected with something, judging from the warts that covered it. Covering the entirety of his body, infact, from his head to his feet that somehow held up his mass. There was no nice way to say it - the goblin king was horribly fat, and judging from how skinny (if horribly disgusting) the other goblins were, Cat wouldn't be surprised if sometimes he resorted to eating his followers. It made her shudder, even more so when she looked at the grisly replicas of a crown and sceptre that he wore.

He was no king, she thought, and Thorin was more regal than any king regardless of a crown upon his ebony hair or not.

Cat had managed to drown out most of the song, the king's comments, and managed to get through the mandatory searching of their persons without giving into the urge to break a goblins finger, even as they tossed her beautiful weapons into the pile with the others, even when Dwalin snarled threateningly at one when she let out a hiss as it yanked on her hair.

She did, however, spare Nori an exasperated look when his 'keepsakes' from Rivendell were discovered, and Nori merely shrugged, completely unrepentant.

"Now, what are you doing in these parts?" Cat started at the king's voice, so different from the other kings and leaders she had met - calm and wise, or regal and stern. No, he was angry, completely out of control when it came to holding himself. She knew even Thranduil, with his crafty words and haughty nature wouldn't debase himself as such. Even if he was a bit of a bastard, he was still every inch a king. This was a creature playing at being a ruler.

She could work with this, she realised with a start. If worse came to worse, which she suspected it would, she could figure out pressure points and how to incapacitate them if need be. But for now? Now, she could stall, play into the role this king wanted to be, and wait until Gandalf came in.

"If you want information, it may be best if I do the talking." Her voice didn't shake, but it wasn't imposing and firm as it could have been. Thorin glanced in her direction, and nodded only slightly. The goblin king, in contrast to how he had reacted in other times to Oin and Bofur doing the talking, looked interested in a way that made Cat's skin crawl. It took all her power to remind herself that he couldn't actually do anything worse than what was depicted on screen. She would stop him before that, if her dwarves didn't jump to her defence first.

"Very well - talk."

"My brother and I are to discuss trade deals with both Greenwood and Laketown between both the city of Bree and Rivendell. We are representatives for the elves - the Lord Elrond could not spare any of his staff. Unlike you, I'm sure if an ally of yours wished to discuss things of such importance you would respond immediately, but I'm sure you know how elves are." She sent a mental apology to the entire elven race as she rolled her eyes.

"Indeed." The king preened a little, and Nori nudged her slightly, giving a quick thumbs up when she glanced at him. The dwarves remained silent, probably remembering how she and Bilbo had stalled the trolls until Gandalf appeared, and realised that she was pulling the exact same trick, though with one who may be marginally more intelligent - though that was no difficult task. "I have, in fact, received such a missive from an ally once believed dead. A search for a dwarven king - I have sent scouts out, obviously. There is a pretty penny to be had if I bring his head - no body required."

"Yes, I see you are clearly more concerned with allies than the elves." Cat managed, reaching out a hand to steady Thorin, who had gone deathly pale. "And one once believed dead, as well? Indeed, he must be a powerful presence."

"A pale orc." The king agreed, and Thorin inhaled sharply. It was audible, and the king narrowed his eyes. "You may be representatives, but that does not explain the dwarves."

"Hired guard." Cat replied smoothly. "I do carry weapons on my person, but I am no fighter, and the road is dangerous for a woman not accustomed to fighting. My brother is not a fighter, also. We should not have hired as many as we did, of course, but it is much better to be safe than sorry."

"I suppose…" The goblin king trailed off, eyes still scanning the company. "You may be true in your tale, but your...guards may have information on a certain dwarven king."

"Not all dwarves know each other." Cat said, her heart beat suddenly kicking up a few notches. A tiny voice in her head was telling her to take them, she could kill the goblins and get out with her company in tow, but she squashed it down. "Just as I do not know all humans. I am certain if they knew a dwarven king, they would not be traipsing through the Misty Mountains with two representatives, never mind the fact said representatives are not dwarves themse -" Cat was cut off by a shriek from one of the goblins, who she hadn't noticed rummaging through their weapons. It had seemed to have chosen Orcrist as it's weapon of choice, and unsheathing the sword had bathed them all in the blue glow. The goblin king let out a sound of fear.

"I know that sword!" He said, and Cat cursed under her breath viciously. "It is the goblin cleaver! Kill them! Kill them all!"

Good, said the voice in Cat's head. Now we can kill them. It sounded distinctly not like Cat's voice, it sounded otherworldly, like sunlight and war and victory all at once. Also, masculine.

Right now, the priority was making sure Thorin did not get his head cut off by a goblin, and Cat wasn't sure how she managed it, elbowing and kicking and digging her nails into the arm of a goblin who had made to hold her back hard enough to draw blood. It reeled back with a shriek, and Cat moved to tackle the goblin above Thorin to buy more time.

It didn't happen, exactly, like that.

If asked how Cat had managed what she had done, later, Cat knew she wouldn't be able to explain the sudden adrenaline that overtook her. Instead of merely tackling the goblin to the ground, her fingers curled into her palm, and instead of hitting with a fist as was customary, the heel of her palm hit the underside of the creatures cheekbone, or where she assumed the cheekbone would be, with a dull, satisfying thud. As expected when hit by another opponent, the goblin turned to her, lashing out with the knife in hand. It felt like something else was guiding Cat as she ducked the blade, almost able to hear it whistle past her ear, and then her elbow lashed out, hitting the goblin in the stomach that sent it lurching back. Her hand flashed out, catching it's wrist and twisting it sharply, hearing the squeal of pain, as the grip on the knife slackened and Cat wrenched it from the goblin's grasp.

In mere seconds, it fell to the ground with a gurgle, the grisly weapon embedded in its neck. Cat was panting heavily when she turned to Thorin, who's blue eyes had gone very wide indeed. Nothing was said about what the fuck she had managed to do, which was a relief, because Cat wasn't too sure what had overcome her in that moment. Instead, a brilliant white light appeared, along with enough force to send the goblins surrounding them to the floor or over the side of the place they were standing.

Gandalf, it seemed, had decided to arrive.

XoooX

Navigating goblin town should not have been as difficult as it was, but of course things were never as simple as they were in movies or story books. Along with the twisting, turning tunnels and paths along the cliff face, there were also flimsy pathways and platforms crafted from planks of wood. Where the goblins had gotten the wood, Cat didn't know, and as far as she knew the nearest woodland was Mirkwood. Even so, that was still far away.

She reminded herself that just outside the mountains, there were trees, but they all seemed rather untouched from what she could remember from the movie, and there was still the question of how the hell they'd managed to craft such an elaborate system of pulleys and platforms and walkways.

Cat should not be wondering about that right now, she thought, twisting with her sword to behead a goblin in the middle of it's strike, raising her shield just in time to block an incoming arrow that would have pierced her eye and put an end to her quickly and almost humiliatingly. Thank God for the shield - she was not dying in a goblin cave, thank you very much. She was worth the ruins of Dale, at the very least.

A shriek and a gurgle alerted Cat to the death of a goblin to the right of her, and she jerked her head in that direction to watch one of Nori's tiny, silver knives disappear back up his sleeve.

"You had him going for a while, there." He said in way of greeting, and another knife appeared in his hand and he hurled it in her direction. There was a whistle of air past her ear, and she turned to watch it embed itself in the forehead of the goblin behind her. "Thought we'd gotten away with it."

"Stupid goblins, too curious for their own good." Cat agreed, and soon they were being swept up by the rest of the company, running along walkways. "Speaking of which, how the fuck did you manage to smuggle a candlestick out of Rivendell?"

"I'm a thief, aren't I?" Nori flashed a grin in her direction, letting out a whoop when a spectacular uppercut from Dwalin sent a goblin careening over the edge of their wooden platform and into the darkness below. "Fuckin' spectacular, that was!" Dwalin merely grunted in reply, but he looked pretty pleased with himself, if Cat did say so herself.

"You think that was spectacular - Cat sweet talking the fucking goblin king was spectacular!" Fili's voice was a comfort, and the slight awe in it was great for Cat's ego. "The fact it was working - what the fuck, Cat?"

"I'm just very charismatic." She said in response, ducking a sweep from a rusty sword and kicking the offending goblin into the abyss beneath their feet. Fili snorted.

"Or you couldn't push him off the platform."

"That, too."

"Less talking, more moving!" Thorin barked from up ahead. "We're going to have to make for the exit, and hope the light will ward them off!"

It was an excellent plan, and the group kept moving, following the grey wizard as they slaughtered all who stood against them on their path to freedom. Cat found it surprisingly easy to work with the fighting styles of the dwarves she was grouped with. Dwalin was definitely more of a heavy hitter, his battleaxes terrifying but beautiful in a strange, savage way, and Fili was definitely more slashy, though Cat didn't know how he managed to have so many swords and knives and daggers on his being. Cat was the only one with a shield, and focused more so on keeping projectile weapons - usually in the form of crudely made arrows - from ending them early, while Nori dived into the gaps in the fray, picking off any stragglers that had managed to dodge the devastating blows from the main fighters.

She could hear the sure and steady thwip of arrows, accompanied by shrieking goblins, alerting her to the fact both Caleb and Kili were picking off the goblins who were attacking them from a distance, the clanging of metal meeting metal. The realisation that they were all a singular unit hit Cat with a startling intensity, and the sudden absence of their hobbit was like a sore thumb - painful and all too obvious. She couldn't help but feel grateful that he was dealing with something smaller and hopefully would be having an easier time of it, as she watched Fili drive his sword into the midsection of a goblin, while pushing another off the edge of the walkway with a booted foot.

Things were going splendidly, up until they were so close to the end and the goblin king appeared from what felt like nowhere - though technically it was from below them, as he destroyed the walkway that led to their freedom. Cat cursed, and the tiny voice in her head that was most certainly not her was telling her that fighting the goblin king was an excellent idea, which it most certainly was not.

She had a suspicion this voice was a Valar, harkening back to Galadriel's theory in Rivendell. If it was, then they were akin to Ares - itching for a fight constantly, and being increasingly stupid about it.

"You thought you could escape me?" The king boasted, slashing his sceptre forward and forcing Gandalf and the company back, though not much further, the path blocked by more goblins. God, why were there so many goblins? "Outsmart me? What are you going to do now, wi -" Cat spotted the dart of silver flying through the air, before she noticed it embed itself in the eye socket of the once arrogant goblin king, deep enough to hit his brain - one hit kill, clean and sharp. Her head whipped around, and her brother was still in the position he was when he let the throwing knife fly, his blue eyes cool and steely. A single strand of hair had fallen onto his face, blood trickling from where his nose had been hit - not broken, fortunately, but he had a lovely bruise blossoming on his cheekbone. She briefly wondered if she looked just as terrible as he did.

Then the corpse of the goblin king fell, and the already unstable platform gave way beneath them and they were falling, yelling and screaming. Cat was vaguely aware of Dwalin wrapping an arm around her middle, one of his hands gripping tight to one of the supporting beams. Her other side was taken by Nori, who let out a slightly delirious whoop of what Cat classified as terrified delight - similar to how, on rollercoasters, she would start laughing to avoid screaming - and his arms were wrapped around her arm, his footing steady and sure despite the fast pace they were approaching the ground at.

They hit the ground inelegantly, and Cat's nose was assaulted by something that smelt vile, like the stink bombs boys used to deploy in classrooms back when she was little, and she gagged. This was accompanied by the sudden extra weight of the corpse of the goblin king falling on top of them, and Cat was honestly surprised she hadn't broken anything.

It didn't take too long to free themselves of the rubble, thankfully, as Kili's sharp yell of Gandalf's name alerted them to the sudden influx of goblins swarming towards them, supposedly intent on avenging their fallen leader.

"There is only one thing that can save us now - the sun!" Gandalf cried, and the company started to run.

Except from Caleb, who paused at the exit tunnel, drawing an arrow. Cat groaned loudly, alerting Kili to the fact that Caleb was not running for his life.

"Caleb, what the hell?!" Cat yelled.

"I love the idea of killing the goblins, but that won't happen!" Kili added, but Caleb ignored the both of them, eyes narrowing slightly.

"I have a theory." Caleb murmured, alighting the tip of an arrow with the flame from one of the torches affixed to the cave wall. He notched it, aimed, and Cat watched as it flew through the air and hit the corpse of the goblin king.

The entire thing, king and debris, was lit alight with a whoosh of flame, fire billowing up, and then they were running, listening to the screeching of goblins being burned alive by the thing that her brother had apparently just blown up.

"What the actual fuck?" Cat managed.

"What she said." Kili agreed.

"It stunk. I guessed sulfur - natural gas deposits under the ground, I bet." Caleb was grinning, eyes bright and slightly manic. "Add fire? Boom."

"Indeed." Kili cast a glance over his shoulder to the burning pile of debris. Cat watched as a smile twitched to life. "Seems those book smarts do come in handy."

"Yep." Caleb agreed. "Still, I'm just about done with mountains."

"And, for once, the entirety of a dwarven company would agree with you." Cat said, clapping a hand on his shoulder. "Let's go!"

And with that, the three of them were running again, eager to be underneath open sky and with the rest of their friends.

XoOoX

Goblin town: *fighting scene*

Me: Ah shit, here we go again

Fighting scenes are...not my forte. I was writing this downstairs and miming Cat hitting a goblins cheekbone and elbowing it in the stomach to try and figure out how to write it, and probably made everyone concerned. But you know, it's whatever.

I may hear technicalities about how arrows can't be lit on fire without a, b and c but, honestly, if Legolas can climb a fucking elephant and defy the laws of physics, I am allowed to write an explosion. Let me have this guys. Please.

Nearly done with the first third, and I am looking forward to writing the second third because I am always a SLUT for elves and the Mirkwood elves in particular and not because I have a couple more elf OCs slotted in there for narrative changes (they're both especially gay - my specialities).

Read, review, and enjoy as always! - Jazz xx