"Would you just let me in?" Draco yelled at the infuriating portrait. "Look, she left her mail at the table," he shouted louder, waving the letters around so she could see them. "I can just drop it off and go, you stupid bint."

"Go away snake," the fat lady sang from her seat, her nose turned up at him. He thanked Circe that the dungeons weren't guarded by a daft portrait. "Leave my little lioness alone."

"Do you really think I won't rip your canvas from your frame?" Draco hissed, causing the fat lady to let out a yelp. Just as he started towards the portrait with his most threatening glare, the door was opening and he was staring into the chestnuts eyes of the witch he was looking for.

"Dra- Malfoy?" Hermione cocked her head to the side, clearly surprised to see him. She tightened her grasp on a small package she was holding.

"Granger," Draco nodded at her. "I was hoping to talk with you," he said, feeling unsure of himself. "Privately," he added with urgency as he glared up at the portrait, who glared back down at him.

"Oh. Come in," Hermione waved him in, turning her body to the side. The smell of vanilla hit him when he walked by her, drying his mouth instantly. As Draco walked through the portrait, he was visually assaulted by an explosion of red and gold. "Tacky, but not surprising," he thought as he surveyed the Gryffindor common room. He stopped in front of the fireplace and turned back towards her, unsure if he should take a seat.

"I was actually on my way to see you," Hermione said brightly, as though she hadn't just hexed him in the Great Hall. She stayed standing, though Draco noted disappointedly that she was just a few steps out of reach. "Not that that matters," he reminded himself, irritated at his subconscious for even noticing.

"Oh really?" He asked dryly, through his heart did a flip at the warmth in her tone.

"As much as you don't want to talk about last night, I'd really like to get to the bottom of it. I got you something. As a peace offering," she extended the small package towards him.

"What is this?" Draco asked, eyeing it suspiciously and shifting his weight uncomfortably. It looked like something from the Weasleys' shop, which he'd only had negative interactions with.

"Open it." Hermione shoved the package towards him again. He took it hesitantly.

"A bag of...coal?" He asked, reading the bag and looking back at her in confusion.

"It is a muggle candy. A joke really," she explained. "I thought you deserved some coal after...well the last six years I guess," Hermione shrugged as he turned the candy over in his hands.

"I deserve coal?" Draco knew he must be looking at her like she had three heads. She gave him a small confused smile in response.

"Surely you know? Santa gives you presents if you are good and lumps of coal if you are bad," Hermione trailed off, waiting for his recognition. He looked down towards the flickering fire for a moment, trying to remember any mention of this, before giving her an incredulous stare.

"And what, pray tell, is Santa?"

"Oh, erm," Hermione paused thoughtfully, looking back at the coal in his hands. "On Christmas, Santa visits the children of the world. He gives gifts for children who have been nice, and coal to those who have been naughty. Have you really not even heard of this? Ron knows who Santa is, so I just thought it was something magical children were also taught. Might be his father's influence then. We never covered it in Muggle Studies and I hadn't thought to do further research into the disparity in holiday traditions because so many overlap. I'll have to do that this week." Draco felt the corners of his mouth turn up as he watched her work through her thoughts. He fought and pushed them back down when she glanced back at him. He wouldn't let Theo be right.

"And you gave me...coal?" he asked, confused. "Because I've been...naughty?" Draco smirked as he drew out the last word, taking care to make his tone cheeky as he raked his eyes mischievously up and down her form. Hermione's cheeks turned the same pink they had last night, which set the hair on the back of Draco's neck straight up.

"No. No, I gave you candy coal as a sign of good faith. Because I know you have a sweet tooth. A joke to clear the air, that's all!" Hermione protested, growing pinker as she spoke.

"Right. Thank you ever so," Draco drawled, putting the candy into his robe pocket. He wondered how Hermione knew about his sweet tooth. The silence hung around the two as they stood awkwardly, looking at each other, unsure.

"Could we talk about last night?" Hermione gestured to the couch next to them. "I'd like to figure out what happened. It really doesn't make much sense."

"Well, I came up here to give you the letters that came for you just as you left" Draco said as he handed her the letters he'd grabbed from the Great Hall. "But I could stay and talk," Draco shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant as he took a seat on the couch. In reality, Hermione's interest in last night's events put him on edge. Theo's explanation, currently burning a hole in his robe pocket, was not something he wanted to share with Hermione, or anyone, ever. Even he was actively trying to block it from his mind.

"Thank you," Hermione said primly as she took the letters and shrunk them to put them in her pocket. "I was thinki-"

"You may want to read them now," Draco interrupted, pointing to the letters she shrunk. "Your boyfriend wrote you," he added, ignoring how hard it was for him to call Potter her boyfriend. But he'd seen them in the Great Hall hugging goodbye as break started and her immediate letter to him the next day. He'd seen her get letters from the blasted owl at nearly every meal.

"My...what?" Her voice squeaked and her brow furrowed.

"Potter," Draco said, looking into the fire across from them and working to keep up his mask of indifference.

"We aren't," Hermione started, "We don't. No. Not my boyfriend." She shook her head and gave a small chuckle. "For the record," she added, flashing him a smile.

"Noted," Draco returned the smile as he said it before he could stop himself. "That is a stunning endorsement of Scarhead, I'll have to share it with him next time we chat."

"Do you have any idea what happened last night?" Hermione asked, ignoring his dig at Potter. "I have a few theories, but I thought you could share your thoughts."

"I drank some firewhiskey and then the next thing I remember was waking up on the floor at five this morning with a terrible headache. Nothing to figure out."

"You don't remember anything else from last night?" Draco noted the concern in her voice with interest. Her dark brows pinched together as she studied him.

"No," he lied, hoping she would pretend that the kiss never happened.

"Oh, we have to get you to the Hospital Wing right now," she said, rising quickly. "Memory loss is serious, you'll need medical attention immediately." The petite girl held out her hand to him. He stared at it, ink-stained and nails chewed down, wondering if talking to her would be worse than rehashing the embarrassing experience with a faculty member.

"Bloody Gryffindor," he muttered, pushing her hand away gently. "Fine, fine, I remember," he said as he gestured for her to sit back down. "It is just fuzzy. But I do remember you being kind, so thank you." Hermione looked like she didn't know what to say, so Draco filled the silence, knowing he should apologize for the kiss. "I know this is exactly how everyone wants to spend their holidays, of course. Brewing up antidotes for creeps and interviewing them afterwards." That was the closest he knew he could get to an apology.

"Creep? I never called you that!" her voice jumped an octave. He flinched at her response.

"Well you definitely called me that last week on the bridge, when you accused me of following you," he spat out the last two words, surprised at how embarrassed he still was about how that encounter kicked off. "Last night I bloody assaulted you and you're still talking to me for scientific integrity."

"You? You think you assaulted me?" Hermione dragged out the last word, staring intently at him. Draco wanted to be anywhere but here. He wished for that quick death now or to melt into the floor. He'd never been a creep, not like this anyway. He'd never really had to pursue a woman. Girls tended to come to him, interested in his name or his fortune. He'd never been in a situation where any attention he gave wasn't at minimum reciprocated. Pansy has been especially aggressive in her affection for him, that he'd barely had to lift a finger.

"Obviously," he sniffed. "I-"

"I'm the one who took advantage of a drugged up prat," she interrupted him, her voice shrill and scratchy, like she was about to cry. " I'm the creep who kissed someone who couldn't consent."

This was not the response he was expecting. "But you -," he started, shaking his head in confusion. They stared at each other in thick silence before Hermione's shoulders began to move. Draco started panicking, completely unprepared to deal with a crying witch, one he was responsible for making cry. His mother would be beside herself at this. But when no tears came, he realized she had begun to giggle. Her giggles quickly grew to loud laughs and she began to wipe her eyes where moisture had just started to gather.

"What about this is so amusing, witch?" Draco practically growled, kicking himself for getting back out of his bed. He could have stayed there for the rest of the break and never had this tedious interaction, never read Theo's message.

"I just was thinking about last night. You were so - you were," Hermione broke off into giggles again. Draco flushed in embarrassment. "You were different. Nice," Hermione said and smiled at him. He didn't know how to react, but his confused face must have reminded her who she was talking to. "But it was the potion, some form of amorteria. So I know it wasn't you."

"Right, it would be ridiculous for me to be nice," Draco fixed a grin on his face as she looked down. "It sounds like we both feel bad about last night. But I did mean it - thank you for helping me. I don't know what would have happened if I had run into anyone else professing my love for them too."

"Thank you for understanding. I'm sorry too." They sat in silence before Hermione spoke again. "I spent most of my night trying to figure out who would do that to you and why, plus where I would fit in there. Let's start by making a list of everyone we think might benefit from dosing you. I will share my list too."

"Okay," Draco nodded, wondering if he should just lie to her, telling her it was Theo's prank gone wrong, that he had no idea why he reacted that way to her. It was plausible enough, but there was the potential this know-it-all would dig into it anyway. Before he could make himself speak, she looked back up and smiled.

"Then maybe you could teach me more parlor games? That part of last night was surprisingly fun."

"Deal," he agreed readily. "Fuck," he added internally as his stomach flipped when she smiled. "No kill, marry, snog tonight though."

"Deal," she said. "How will I ever live without knowing which teacher you'd kill?" Hermione said with a dramatic sigh before flashed him a conspiratorial grin. Draco masked his pounding anxiety with a tight smile in return, the accidental reminder of his mission engulfing him in the stress and fear he'd been able to push off since before he drank Theo's gift.

"We can't all snog Snape," Draco replied coldly, arching an eyebrow and making Hermione clap her hands over her flushed face. At that sight, he let out a bark of laughter, his worries fading quickly as he watched her. They laughed together as the fire in front of them roared.