[DISCLAIMER: These are completely fictional and no real Hololive characters were harmed in writing this chapter.
Thank you for the recent reviews – the two new ones made me add to the story since I see you all are reading, and I'm happy this story makes you smile. I hope you a fantastic 2021!
Okay, so Princess Luna is not appearing yet, but we have Lt. Oozora Subaru and a brief dance number.]
Chapter 11 – Wanted Dead or Alive, but mostly Dead
The ship was surrounded by a brigade of Lu-Knights, all with spears and swords out, as they walked onto the main deck.
"Murasaki Shion, you are under arrest for crimes against the country Candy Land and you made our beautiful and stunning, one-of-a-kind, most lovely creature to ever grace the world, Princess Luna, very upset. She wants you to be apprehended and brought back to her dead or alive to apologize."
"What type of an announcement is that?" Shion screeched. She held out her staff ready to make them all leave the ship. "I'll take you all down."
Aqua held to her hand. "Hold up now."
"What are you doing?" Shion was steaming. "I'm going to blast them all."
"Did they say you just need to give the Princess an apology?"
"Yes, but I will never apologize to that brat."
"Whoa," Aqua held her hand up, talking to the one who spoke on the brigade. "Please, did the Princess only want an apology?"
"Yes," the leader of the brigade stepped forward, "she wants it dead or alive."
"Excuse me…" Aqua patted at her forehead, "I'm new to this whole human thing, but how do you apologize when you're dead?"
"We are not sure."
The brigade spoke amongst themselves. "Could it be a mistake in the writing?" "I don't know, who wrote the thing?" "I'm sure it was written by the Princess." "Well, then it can't be questioned."
The leader cleared his throat. "It would seem she needs to apologize whether alive or dead."
"Well, then that makes it obvious." Aqua stepped forward, grabbing Shion's staff from her hand. "We'd like to apologize alive."
"Oh well, that would be better."
Shion screeched again, "Are you a total idiot?! Give me back my staff!"
She started leaping and trying to grab the staff back, but as she did so she was pinged on the noggin by none other than a young Lieutenant, Lt. Oozora Subaru, and her slingshot.
"Shuba, shuba, shuba."
Shion fell to the deck, out cold.
"Let's go guys." Lt. Subaru wore a smart little cap and had a very different outfit that exposed her midriff and tight shorts. Princess Luna preferred it that way, as did the Chief Magistrate of the Land, Yuzuki Choco.
"You promise not to hurt her?" Aqua asked, "I mean other than the shot to the head."
"Oh, she'll be fine once she apologizes. Do you want to come along?" Subaru asked, seeming genuinely kind.
"Yes please."
"Alright then, because you have impeccable manners you can come along."
"Do manners go a long way here?"
"Oh, shuba, shuba, shuba, you bet they do." Subaru leaned into the small Neko, "and between you and me, the Princess has a bad temper and so it's best to always have good manners."
"I can see now why Shion has to apologize. She's not very good with manners."
"Yeah, she's pretty cheeky and unlikable, as I recall."
Aqua didn't think she was all that unlikable, but she could see how others might think such a thing. She just had to drop off the staff inside the bed chambers, and then she ran back out to catch a ride with the Lt. Subaru.
The soldiers carried the unconscious witch, threw her on the back of the wagon like a slab of beef, and Subaru sat in front with Aqua chatting away as they drove to the castle.
"It's quite nice here, isn't it?" Aqua commented.
The landscape was covered in greenery and rolling hills. In the distance you could see the most beautiful and graceful white stone castle with a tall spire with a pink candy cane swirl leading to the top.
"Yeah, Princess Luna has a new Magistrate in charge and she's been making some changes." The Lieutenant squirted her lips around, "really… weird changes."
"Really?"
"Yeah, sometimes… well, I don't like to question how things are run in a kingdom, ya know, but they are quite different."
"Hmm…" Aqua considered what was being said, and then she asked. "Shion is going to wake up, right?"
"Oh yeah, I only used a low-grade poison on her. Choco-sensei makes them for all the Lu-Knights. She said it works better than torture, which is time-consuming – takes out the middle man."
"Excuse me, poison?"
"It doesn't kill."
"Oh good."
"Not immediately… any way."
"What?!"
Aqua turned quickly, to look at her best friend lying at the back of the wagon. What did she mean it wouldn't be instant? That meant it would eventually be.
"The antidote is ready for when she apologizes. It's a new rule from the Magistrate."
"This Magistrate seems a little extreme."
"Hmm… I suppose…." Lt. Subaru considered the new friend's words, rubbing her chin.
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The Fire Elf Pub became lively, as the piano player started up, with a raucous Chuck Berry song, "You Never Can Tell," and Okayu and Korone started singing.
Rushia loved this song, dancing toward Marine, taking her hand, and then they started boogieing.
Marine and Rushia danced a strange dance, where they faced each other and made like a scissor motion across their brow, like they were swimming and twisting. It was an old-fashioned dance called The Twist, with a mix of the Swim thrown in (check it out, it was in Pulp Fiction). Towa and Ayame liked it and followed along, and then Noel and Flare did the same.
Soon the whole joint was jiving and swinging to the song.
"C'est la vie said the old folks, you never can tell…" sang Korone and Okayu in unison.
The party was the most lively the pub had ever seen.
Drinks were aplenty, rounds being bought by the Ojou, and each took their turn singing at the piano.
Danchou Noel finally looked down at her texts, which is how most of the Lu-Knights corresponded, and then she saw one from her right-hand, Lt. Subaru, stating they captured the wanted criminal, Murasaki Shion and there would be a trial in the morning deciding if she would apologize alive or dead. Probably dead.
"What?" Danchou looked more closely. "Does that make sense?" She shook her head side-to-side, possibly she read it wrong because she was very drunk.
"Need to go," she told Flare, "it seems they finally caught that criminal, Shion. She'll probably die in the morning. They always do."
"Wait – what?!" Marine sobered quickly, as the others all heard and joined, walking up to the Captain. "Where's my daughter?"
"What daughter?" Flare's eyes widened, "You're a MILF?!"
"Well," Marine blushed, "I suppose I am."
All were talking amongst themselves, sure Shion could be bothersome, but none of them wanted her dead. Mostly they wanted her alive.
"We need to head back to the ship and then head to the castle," Marine made a directive for her crew, "Nobody dies from my crew whether we like them or not."
"Aye Senchou!" All cheered in unison, as they headed back to the ship with Ayame and Towa following along. Flare headed back with Noel because this sounded like something worth having a front seat to watch.
Soon, by word of the mouth, the entire town was talking over the trial in the morning of the most wanted criminal in Candy Land.
Tickets were going on sale. Bets were going fast on whether she'd apologize dead or alive.
[END NOTE: Thank you for reading this short chapter. Next up is Magistrate Choco and Princess Luna with the trial of the century.]