It had come.
He'd woken up, groaning and rubbing at his face after a mere two hours of sleep, a night spent of tossing and turning erratically. His brain was foggy, still clouded by sleep and a deep desire for more. He laid there, not moving when a startling realization came to mind.
It was today.
Today was a day that he'd simultaneously yearned for and dreaded ever since that fateful day in class where he and Shelby were assigned as partners. It was finally there, their project due date. Today, he and Shelby were going to have to present their reenactment of the scene they'd chosen from Romeo and Juliet, as well as hand in the essays that they'd written.
He was sort of bewildered; somehow, he'd forgotten the date, which never happened because he was fairly good at remembering everything. However, in the midst of everything else that was going on, it had simply slipped away from him, as rare of an occurrence that it was. The day that he'd wanted nothing more than to flash-forward to, to avoid dreadful days of meeting up with Shelby was there and he was feeling a bit dazed that he'd forgotten all about.
But he had.
And now, he had very little time before it came time to stand in front of the class to showcase what they'd learned from the assignment. The worst imaginable outcomes were spewing from his mind, driving him further on edge.
He couldn't take it. Feeling as though he was about to be led to his doom in mere hours. It was a vast overreaction, one that he'd be wholly ashamed of if anyone found out. It was irrational, it was ridiculous, it was unnecessary.
But there was no stopping it. There was no way for him to simply turn off that part of him, to tackle the task with a calm and stable mind, much like most of the other students did.
It just didn't make sense. People like him were cool and collected. They didn't overreact to the smallest things or fret for days until said thing occurred. It wasn't right. It only served to prove how abnormal he was in comparison to the rest of society; how much of an outside he truly was, no matter how he'd tried shove that realization aside for so long.
And now you have to face it
Now you understand why everyone thought you were so weird
Because you are weird
And pathetic
And that's not gonna ever change
The nausea was severe, crippling. What little he had contained in his stomach made its way to the back of his throat, only the thickest of swallowing kept it at bay. Taking deep breaths wasn't doing much, because they were so shallow, it felt like the air in the room was becoming constricted.
Get a grip, his mind was screaming.
What is the matter with you?
Luke wouldn't do this
He wouldn't care
Why can't you be more like Luke?
You aren't Luke and that's why you're such a disappointment
But I do not want to be a disappointment...
Jessie's voice, from outside his room, was distant. She was calling to them, warning them that they better be getting up this instant or else. He vaguely heard it, the sound became jumbled into the mess that was his brain.
It was seconds later, when his mouth tasted something coppery-somehow, he'd bitten down on his lip and drew blood. His eyebrows knit together in confusion and he brought two of his fingers to his lip.
Idiot
He was a puddle of nerves during breakfast, only able to ingest a few measly bites of cereal that he spent more time watching as the bits of cereal floated around in the bowl and two gulps of juice that sent dribbles rolling down his chin.
He was going to regret that, not eating. He should have really packed something else-a granola bar, even-so his stomach wouldn't do a terribly accurate impression of a dying whale when the class grew quiet and so all eyes would turn back to peer at him.
However, he didn't do that.
Because you're an idiot
He was wringing his hands as he and his siblings made the morning commute to school, keeping a distance behind them. He hadn't said much to them or Jessie since finding out that they'd left to go to dinner to celebrate Zuri's achievement without him. It would have been a tedious task, as dinner seemed to be more and more lately. He'd began to dislike going out in public, feeling as though everyone was staring at him. Judging him. Knowing that something was right with him. He would have spent majority of the time huddled in the corner of the booth, sitting there quietly and not speaking unless it was tell the waiter what he wanted or that, yes, he would like a refill.
But that wasn't the point.
None of that should have mattered. Jessie should have known that he wasn't there and checked to see when he was going to be home instead of rushing out like a careless teenager abandoning her household duties in order to hangout with her friends.
Someone's bitter
I have a right to be bitter
Do you?
Absolutely! Jessie would never have done that to Luke or Zuri or Emma
You don't know that
I most certainly do!
He was within visual distance of the school when he caught sight of Shelby standing nearby the front entrance, to the side where she wouldn't be a hindrance that prevent other students from going in. Her focus was elsewhere, besides noticing Ravi as he grew closer. She must have been daydreaming, thinking about what she'd left behind in her move or whatever else that ran through her head.
Frankly, he didn't want to know.
Ravi was cautious to make as little as possible. Perhaps he could slide past her and she wouldn't notice-not yet until they were in first hour. He might get some peace and quiet-
"Hi, Ravi!" she beamed.
Or, perhaps not.
"Hello," he said tiredly.
He went inside with Shelby skipping behind him, chattering as per usual.
"Wasn't it so pretty outside? My mom says she can't wait until fall comes. Do you like fall? I don't mind, I suppose. I like summer better, though. I like swimming. Do you like swimming? Have you done it before? We used to go swimming in a lake and it was so fun! Have you ever been in a lake? Well, maybe not around here but did they have lakes in India? They must have, right? I think so, but I suck at geography and stuff so I don't know."
She giggled.
"Are you not tired?" he felt another yawn coming through, he stifled it with his hands, his muttering sounding muffled.
"Nope!" She was shaking her head and the two braids she wore swooshed around. "I'm fine! But thanks for asking! You're always so nice, you know that? My other friends are nice, too. Although, Emily was kinda grumpy when she didn't get enough sleep, which was all the time because she likes to stay up late. Once she made pizza at three in the morning. Her parents were so mad, but the pizza was so good; she brought some for us to try. Do you like pineapple on pizza? That's what it was and I wasn't sure if it was gonna be any good or not but it was!"
"I don't know," Ravi said, shrugging. "I've never had it."
Shelby gasped-no one turned to look. It was far too early for such nonsense and their fellow classmates had grown used to her over dramatic tendencies. "Ravi! You have to try it! It's the best! Oooh! I know! We'll go get some this weekend! Won't that be fun?"
No
"I cannot." He didn't want to go anywhere with her. "I'm still grounded."
"Oh, well! We'll wait until you're ungrounded, then we'll go!" Shelby seemed to think that was a fine idea. "I love pizza, don't you? It's so good. What kind do you like? I love thin crust. Regular crust is too chewy and I hate cheese stuffed crust. It's gross," her nose scrunched up a bit, her eyes toward Ravi critically-it was an odd sort of look for her to have. "Do you like cheese crust?"
He raised his eyebrows. "It's alright. I have no particular opinion of it."
Isn't that an opinion, though?
"Interesting," she said, mysteriously.
I hardly think so
"All this talk about pizza is making me hungry," Shelby said, sighing. "Dad isn't able to go to the store until after work and all I had was a cinnamon roll-oh, diddly darn dang it!"
"Diddly-what?" Ravi stared at her, bewildered.
She slapped her forehead. "I should've brought you one, too!"
"That wouldn't have been necess-"
"I wasn't thinking," she spoke right over him, shaking her head. She, then, giggled. "Sometimes I think if my head wasn't screwed on, it would fall right off!"
Yes, I'm sure that's a daily concern
"I'll bring you one tomorrow," she told him, still adamant on the subject. Ravi saw there was no use in declining-anymore than he'd tried. She wouldn't take his answer; somehow thinking he was in dire need of that pastry.
And, as it just so happened, his stomach chose the perfect moment to grumble.
His cheeks flushed.
Shelby peered down at his abdomen, then back up to his face. "Did you not eat breakfast? You really should, you know. It is the most important meal of the day. My mom's always saying that. Do you want something? I think I have something extra in my lunch you can have. Do you want it now? I-" she reached a hand back to unzip part of her backpack.
"No-" Before he could properly think, he took ahold of the top of her hand, effectively stopping her.
His breath hitched.
Her hand was really soft.
And her hand was only a little bit smaller than his, fitting perfectly.
As if he'd been electrocuted, Ravi let go. Shelby didn't seem to have felt what he had and she tilted her head in curiosity. He cleared his throat. "Erm, there is no need. I'll be fine until lunch."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Are you really sure?"
"Yes."
"You're really stubborn," she noted, wryly. "Maybe more than Emily."
It wasn't clear whether that was intended to be a compliment or an insult.
"Yes, well," he didn't have a clever comeback or a proper response at all, but he didn't want to just stand there like an idiot.
He picked up his pace.
And so did she.
"Are you nervous?" She was attempting to whisper and it came out so horribly un-whisper-like that he rolled his eyes.
"For what?" Better to plead ignorance.
"The project. It's due today."
"Right," he muttered.
"You don't have to be nervous," she said, most unhelpfully. "It'll be okay."
No, it will not!
I will most definitely make a fool of myself
"We could go first if you want to," Shelby suggested. "That way, we'll be done and we can enjoy everyone else's!"
"No," as embarrassing as it was, his voice came out a tad high pitch at the idea. "No, I will not do it!"
"Last, then?" He stiffened when she brushed a few pieces of his hair to the side. "Oooh, your hair is so soft, did you know? I like it! Have you ever thought about growing it out? On second thought, you look nicer with it cut short. Unless you want to grow it out, I'd support you either way."
"I'm fine with the way it is," he said curtly.
"Okay!"
He yawned into his hand. It would take a great deal of strength not to indulge in the ever growing temptation to rest his eyes during class.
"Are you tired?" She asked with genuine curiosity, as if the sight of a yawn was something new and exciting to be seen. "Did you get enough sleep last night? You look like that a lot, like you haven't. You really should try, though. My mom says sleep is important. Are your siblings keeping you awake? Is that why? Elliot does that, sometimes. He says he needs a glass of water but my dad knows better."
"I'm fine," he lied.
"No, you're not," she said, seeing through his thinly veiled façade. "You always say that."
"I do not," he argued, becoming fed up with her eerie ability to tell if he was lying or not. Most would just take his word without questioning it-if they bothered with him at all. "And even if I did, I don't believe it's any of your business!"
He straightened up to his full height, it was hardly anywhere close to intimidating as they were nearly the same height. Ravi was just the tiniest bit taller.
She simply smiled but said no more. It was one of those infuriating smiles, one that made him want to throttle her.
Someone's violent
It is not my fault!
Suuure
I cannot help it, she brings out the worst in me
You can't keep blaming your faults on others
Ravi sat down in his assigned seat, gazing at the clock. Only five minutes until he would be dragged to his doom. Overdramatic, much? With his luck, they would get picked first; that, or Shelby would volunteer them because it'd be fun. He threw a sharp glance over to where she was sitting beside him, oblivious to his thoughts. She was doodling on one of her extra notebooks she carried. She'd better not, he swore. Better not even think of doing such a thing. He'd already made his opinion of the matter known, but that wouldn't stop her if she was bent on doing it.
"Why are you watching me?"
"I wasn't!" Ravi denied, cursing himself for being so careless. He hadn't meant to stare like that, getting lost in his thoughts so when she looked up, he was still looking at her. He didn't want her jumping to any unnecessary conclusions.
Which was what she was obviously doing now. She tapped her pen against her cheek, a grin spreading across her face. "Stop it," he said, warningly. She only giggled. "I mean it!"
Honestly, it wasn't that funny, but with a hand covering her mouth, she just laughed and laughed. She was hunched over, body trembling the slightest bit. A few of the students that were already there had glanced back, exchanging a look between themselves, but otherwise turned back to the front.
Ravi slid back into his desk, putting a hand to shield half of his face. If there was ever a time that he'd wanted to disappear, this was it. He felt extraordinarily bad for the man that was going to end up with her.
That's interesting
What?
You thinking about her future husband
So?
It's just funny, you spend an awful lot of time thinking about a person that you supposedly cannot stand
"Are you done?" he hissed.
Shelby sat straighter, taking a deep breath, a few stray giggles coming out. "Yes," her face had gone a light shade of pink from all that, but she was as lively as ever. "Sorry. That was just so funny! You should have seen your face!"
"Yes, I'm sure it was amusing," he muttered, crossly.
She nudged him. "Are you mad? Did I upset you? Because if I did, I didn't mean to. Just messing around. Thought you could use it. You look a bit tense, you know?"
Oh, you have no idea
Because you won't talk to her! How's she supposed to know if you keep it all to yourself?
It's none of her business!
Yet, you expect her to know
I expect her to have basic manners. That, I believe, isn't asking much
It is if you're asking Luke
"I did upset you, didn't I?" Shelby noted, looking thoughtful. She reached over to pat him on the shoulder. "Well, if it makes you feel any better, I'm sorry."
Ravi didn't say anything. It wasn't the most horrendous thing she'd done since coming there, but he wished she would have more respect for herself (and him) and act her age when she was out.
She did look like she'd genuinely meant it. There was nothing but the utmost sincerity in her eyes and she really had no business looking like a puppy dog like that.
And it'd been quite a while since someone apologized to him without being prompted or said so dismissively.
"You're forgiven," he groaned and she cheered. He didn't even make any noise when she threw an arm around his neck, pulling him in for a brief hug, their cheeks touching.
"You're the best! Oh, I just know we'll be besties forever! Won't that be fun!?"
As much as a root canal.
Instead, he said, "Sure."
She grinned.
The rest of the class came piling in, with Miss Zenon following a moment later. As it turned out, no one was really looking forward to what was to come. Well, except, maybe, for Shelby. She was one of the very few that was looking revoltingly chipper.
Ravi wondered, if not for the first time, if she something had happened to her during infancy.
"Good morning, class," Miss Zenon addressed them.
They mumbled-besides, Shelby.
"Let me try again...good morning, class."
"Good morning, Miss Zenon," everyone chorised.
"That's better," Miss Zenon chuckled. She did what she usually did at the start of the class, she sat on the edge of her desk, swinging her legs. One time, another teacher that Ravi vaguely recognized but never personally had, came in to ask if Mis Zenon had any luck with the printer in the teacher's lounge and she eyed their teacher distastefully, as if seeing how their teacher was sitting had ruined her whole day. "Now, it's the day everyone's been waiting for-"
Some students groaned.
"That's the spirit," she said, humorously. Shelby giggled. "Don't fret, guys. I know you've all worked really hard on your projects," she settled her eyes on a few of the more notorious slackers that were there, "or, you should have. But tell you what, I'll bring in a treat for the class next week if we can get through this painlessly. Deal?"
That perked some of them up.
"Like what?" one of them asked. "Can it be chocolate?"
"I'm allergic to chocolate," someone else frowned.
"Then don't take any!"
"I like chocolate," Shelby said, happily. The first student who spoke up nodded, gesturing to her.
"See? Everyone likes chocolate."
"Well, I don't," the second student said, sourly.
"Okay, okay," Miss Zenon cut through them. "That's enough. There's no need to argue. There will be something for everyone to enjoy, got it?" She didn't want for any responses to come back. "Now, let's move on, shall we? When I call you up, I want you to bring your glossary and essays you write and I want you to staple them altogether: your and your partners. Then you will do your reenactment. We'll try to get through as many as we can, today. Are there any questions?"
Yes
Can I opt out?
You wish
I do, I really do
Thankfully, he and Shelby were not called first. Shelby was probably disappointed but that didn't matter. That's harsh. Ravi kept tapping his foot nervously; at one point, someone finally had enough, turned around and gave him a dirty look.
"Will you stop that?" the girl snapped, keeping her voice to a minimum. "It's very distracting!"
"Sorry," he murmured.
The girl huffed and turned back around.
Shelby gestured for him to come closer. Sighing lowly, he did so. "She must not have gotten enough sleep," she appeared to be very concerned about it. "Sleep is important. I should tell her after class."
Ravi didn't know what came over him, but he had to suppress a snort.
Shelby noticed and seemed delighted.
"You laughed," she sad in a whisper, excitedly. "You've never done that with me before!"
"You've never been funny, before," he shrugged.
You sound flirty
I wouldn't do such a thing
Well, that's what you sound like
Don't be ridiculous
"I wasn't trying to be," she said. "But I'm glad it helped!"
Ravi shushed her. Miss Zenon had glanced over her shoulder, raising her eyebrows. He'd hurriedly diverted his eyes to the students that were presenting. "Shh, you are going to get us in trouble," he said as much as he could without moving his lips-trying not to come off as acting suspicious.
"Ravi, Shelby, why don't you go next?" Miss Zenon said whilst writing some notes on the rubric attached to the clipboard.
She'd known, that they had been talking when they should have been paying attention, so now it was their turn.
Oh, no
I'm going to vomit
The air suddenly felt suffocating, hot. Ravi ducked his head, clumsily gathering all of his necessary papers, handing them to Shelby and made his way to the front of the room. His legs felt were shaky, loose like jelly.
I think I am going to pass out
It's hot
They're all staring
I can't do this
I can't do this
I can't do this
"What's your reenactment going to be on?" Miss Zenon got out a fresh rubric to grade them, her pen hovering just above the paper.
"Romeo and Juliet," Shelby told her when he did not speak up. "We're doing the friar scene."
Miss Zenon hummed, nodding.
After Ravi had left her house the day he'd come over to study (which was nowhere near a date), Shelby wrote all of their lines on index cards for them to read off of, so they didn't have to deal with the book or having to pass it back and forth.
"Alright, just one moment, please," Miss Zenon told them.
Shelby took the opportunity to lean closer to him, whispering, "You'll do fine."
"Alright, begin."
They stood facing each other. She was smiling encouragingly, giving him a thumbs up.
" Holy Francisian! Brother, ho!" He managed to get out, his voice steadier than he imagined it would be.
" This should be the voice of Friar John! Welcome from Mantua: what says Romeo? Or, if his mind is written, give me his letter," Shelby's was much more cheerful.
He went slower with this next line, as it had given him much trouble. " Going to find a bare-foot brother out one of our order, to associate me, here in this city visiting the sick and finding him, the searchers of the town, suspecting that we both were in a house where the infectious pestilence did reign, seal'd up the doors, and would not us forth; so that my speed to Mantua there was stay'd."
"Unhappy fortune!" She raised her fist in the air-a substitute, he figured, for shouting. " By my brotherhood, the letter was not nice but full of charge, of dear import, and the neglecting it. May do much danger. Friar John, go hence; get me an iron crow, and bring it straight. Unto my cell."
" Brother, I'll go and bring it to thee," Ravi read.
That was his cue to 'exit' so he took a step backwards, his arms going behind him.
" Now must I to the monument alone; within three hours will fair Juliet wake: she will beshrew me much that Romeo hath had no choice of these accidents; but I will write again on Mantua, and keep her at my cell till Romeo come; poor living corse, closed in a dead man's tomb," Shelby said with finality.
Miss Zenon clapped and the class followed. "Well done," she complimented them.
Shelby beamed. "Thanks!"
Ravi was beyond relieved that it was over and not as painful as he thought it would be. "Yes, thank you."
They made their way back to their seats. "Good job," Shelby lightly punched his shoulder. She sat down. "I knew you could do it. You just needed to know you could do it."
Ravi was quiet. "Yes, well," he shifted, "I suppose. And, erm, thank you."
"You don't need to thank me," she said, simply.
She stared ahead at the rest of the presentations, not bothering Ravi again.
Unbeknownst to her, the tiniest of smiles came onto his face.