p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px; text-align: center;" data-p-id="bc3ad2db71283ec9fa5a11f4c8221acb"span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-weight: bold;"Akuma Lancaster /span/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="b3ad9844167419fc01587aee4998d5d7"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"Everything felt like a blur./em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="d0bc9e5dcfc5efa7e45be3bc393a76e7"Here I am sitting next to my father, the man who had done so many bad things and had abused me, murdered my close friend, and he tells me that he had been lying to me all my life. He then tells me that I was going to see my mother who he had told me before was dead. Now, to top it all off, he said that he was em style="box-sizing: border-box;"sorry. /emI don't know how to feel about any of this. It was all happening to fast and it was making me feel sick to my stomach. I wanted to jump off of this bullet train and fall to my death. What in the world was I supposed to do? Supposed to think? Was he expecting me to tell him that I forgive him? No, that wasn't ever going to happen. After what he had done to me and what he continues to do, I cannot trust him. He moved me to another country and made me think that my em style="box-sizing: border-box;"mother /emwas dead for seventeen years. She isn't alive, this is just some sick joke from him. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="053f7adbb5d095cfa72a3092449a4424"When we arrived to the station, I quickly got off the train and rushed out to the crisp air. I took in a deep breath and closed my eyes, putting in my other headphone and blaring my music, hoping to drown out the slamming thoughts that purged my pulsing head. I wanted to escape from my bittersweet reality but I couldn't help but feel just a bit exited to see my mother. If this was true and not some sick joke, then my dream of seeing my mom was coming true. But, there was also that thought that she wasn't the woman that I had dreamed of for so long. There was a chance that she was just as cold as my father and if she was, then this isn't the life that I want to live anymore. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="f1ebe07e40de18dbb61ffa321626d35a""This way, Akuma." /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="1d33c337316efe85a9fd254e9761f752"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"I hate my stupid name. /em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="6881569dd7178a1764996ca7877a3a6b"I felt my father's hand on the middle of my back as he gently guided me forward. Before, the man would have shoved me. It's as if this man was possessed and had become a new person all together. What made him want to change so desperately? I frowned, walking forward with my father to God knows where. Then, my father had stopped. I looked up from my feet and my eyes connected with hers. The only woman that was standing there with the brightest smile on her face. She gasped, putting her hands in front of her mouth as her eyes welled up with tears. I jerked my earphones out of my ears, letting the sounds of the station blur away as my father took a step beside me. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="616d00913430cb4d51b3588e003aeda8""Lilith?" My father whispers. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="7e1f9d7d84a080e7b914a49c1964ecd8"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"That is my mother?/em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="105963c1fcd843ee18a9b3275c669c15""Is that...?" She asked, her eyes darting between my father and I. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="821d6875cf592ab2cc7e2d85a55f8eeb""Our daughter." He said./p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="6a3878e743e51fdf2ffaee16f7ae0890"My heart had stopped. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="d1ee070580241d6e22558e9851ceb9c0"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"Daughter?/em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="b53d6497afe69bb3baec4c6cfdd62a37"I looked up to my father and saw em style="box-sizing: border-box;"tears /emfalling down his face. He didn't stop them either. I stood there looking at my father and watched him break. He could no longer hold back his cries. The man suddenly fell to his knees and broke down sobbing. Lilith, the strange woman that could very well be my mother, came to my father and knelt down. She put her hand on his back as he wept. I didn't know what to do. All of this, the sudden change of my father, the sudden realization that my mother was alive, and the shock of being in another country was taking a tole on my emotions and my body. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="b6a1dce2738e8deae975dde5a175a8a5""I am sorry. Akuma, forgive me. I was selfish, I had done so much wrong with you. You are my daughter." He choked, "You were never my son. You are my beautiful daughter. I can't... I can't tell you how sorry I am." He sobbed./p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="5b0872013f5abbf6ec1d6105c1e83f24"The man suddenly turned his body to me, bowing at my feet in deepest regrets. He sobbed saying he was sorry over and over again. Lilith rubbed his back and sat there next to him. He just went on talking about his family, the life that had swallowed him in darkness. How had done nothing but please his father to no end. He never realized the pain he had put his family through until now, after years of Lilith talking to him. Praying for him, hoping that the love of her life would come back to her. I took a step back, hearing all of this seemed to be too good to be true. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="0e088c7c48df63dad960767b4679dfc7"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"This can't be happening, can't it?/em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="a6ab829e5029d06d2cd63ed0dec09dc8"My dreams, they were coming true. My mom was here, my father was breaking down admitting his wrongs. I didn't know if I wanted to cry or scream in frustration. What could I do? The man had treated me like trash for em style="box-sizing: border-box;"years /emand suddenly he was sorry? I didn't know what else to do besides run. So that is what I did, I turned around and ran into the distance. I heard him shouting my name, my mother was trying to as well but I ignored them. I turned my arms into cannons and blew myself further and further away until I was in the middle of the woods. I fell to my knees and tried my hardest to catch my breath. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="c50aab1d72ed8a4aec0fc96b89a6e086"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"Great, just what I need, an anxiety attack./em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="2098cbe10233619a0640a252709bba60"I couldn't breath, sobs were chocking out of my throat. I tried to breath but instead when I cried I held in my breath, trying to make it stop. Eventually, with my hands clawing at the dirt of the forest, I took in a few calming breaths and let myself cry. All the pain that I had built up in the past seventeen years was finally unleashing. I slammed my fists into the ground over and over again until I was able to just sit there and breathe. I was surrounded by the nature of Japan and I let nature calm me down and admired the beauty of nature. Trying to collect my thoughts and sort them out so that I could be human again./p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="b3ad9844167419fc01587aee4998d5d7"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"Everything felt like a blur./em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="d0bc9e5dcfc5efa7e45be3bc393a76e7"Here I am sitting next to my father, the man who had done so many bad things and had abused me, murdered my close friend, and he tells me that he had been lying to me all my life. He then tells me that I was going to see my mother who he had told me before was dead. Now, to top it all off, he said that he was em style="box-sizing: border-box;"sorry. /emI don't know how to feel about any of this. It was all happening to fast and it was making me feel sick to my stomach. I wanted to jump off of this bullet train and fall to my death. What in the world was I supposed to do? Supposed to think? Was he expecting me to tell him that I forgive him? No, that wasn't ever going to happen. After what he had done to me and what he continues to do, I cannot trust him. He moved me to another country and made me think that my em style="box-sizing: border-box;"mother /emwas dead for seventeen years. She isn't alive, this is just some sick joke from him. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="053f7adbb5d095cfa72a3092449a4424"When we arrived to the station, I quickly got off the train and rushed out to the crisp air. I took in a deep breath and closed my eyes, putting in my other headphone and blaring my music, hoping to drown out the slamming thoughts that purged my pulsing head. I wanted to escape from my bittersweet reality but I couldn't help but feel just a bit exited to see my mother. If this was true and not some sick joke, then my dream of seeing my mom was coming true. But, there was also that thought that she wasn't the woman that I had dreamed of for so long. There was a chance that she was just as cold as my father and if she was, then this isn't the life that I want to live anymore. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="f1ebe07e40de18dbb61ffa321626d35a""This way, Akuma." /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="1d33c337316efe85a9fd254e9761f752"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"I hate my stupid name. /em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="6881569dd7178a1764996ca7877a3a6b"I felt my father's hand on the middle of my back as he gently guided me forward. Before, the man would have shoved me. It's as if this man was possessed and had become a new person all together. What made him want to change so desperately? I frowned, walking forward with my father to God knows where. Then, my father had stopped. I looked up from my feet and my eyes connected with hers. The only woman that was standing there with the brightest smile on her face. She gasped, putting her hands in front of her mouth as her eyes welled up with tears. I jerked my earphones out of my ears, letting the sounds of the station blur away as my father took a step beside me. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="616d00913430cb4d51b3588e003aeda8""Lilith?" My father whispers. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="7e1f9d7d84a080e7b914a49c1964ecd8"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"That is my mother?/em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="105963c1fcd843ee18a9b3275c669c15""Is that...?" She asked, her eyes darting between my father and I. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="821d6875cf592ab2cc7e2d85a55f8eeb""Our daughter." He said./p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="6a3878e743e51fdf2ffaee16f7ae0890"My heart had stopped. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="d1ee070580241d6e22558e9851ceb9c0"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"Daughter?/em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="b53d6497afe69bb3baec4c6cfdd62a37"I looked up to my father and saw em style="box-sizing: border-box;"tears /emfalling down his face. He didn't stop them either. I stood there looking at my father and watched him break. He could no longer hold back his cries. The man suddenly fell to his knees and broke down sobbing. Lilith, the strange woman that could very well be my mother, came to my father and knelt down. She put her hand on his back as he wept. I didn't know what to do. All of this, the sudden change of my father, the sudden realization that my mother was alive, and the shock of being in another country was taking a tole on my emotions and my body. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="b6a1dce2738e8deae975dde5a175a8a5""I am sorry. Akuma, forgive me. I was selfish, I had done so much wrong with you. You are my daughter." He choked, "You were never my son. You are my beautiful daughter. I can't... I can't tell you how sorry I am." He sobbed./p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="5b0872013f5abbf6ec1d6105c1e83f24"The man suddenly turned his body to me, bowing at my feet in deepest regrets. He sobbed saying he was sorry over and over again. Lilith rubbed his back and sat there next to him. He just went on talking about his family, the life that had swallowed him in darkness. How had done nothing but please his father to no end. He never realized the pain he had put his family through until now, after years of Lilith talking to him. Praying for him, hoping that the love of her life would come back to her. I took a step back, hearing all of this seemed to be too good to be true. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="0e088c7c48df63dad960767b4679dfc7"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"This can't be happening, can't it?/em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="a6ab829e5029d06d2cd63ed0dec09dc8"My dreams, they were coming true. My mom was here, my father was breaking down admitting his wrongs. I didn't know if I wanted to cry or scream in frustration. What could I do? The man had treated me like trash for em style="box-sizing: border-box;"years /emand suddenly he was sorry? I didn't know what else to do besides run. So that is what I did, I turned around and ran into the distance. I heard him shouting my name, my mother was trying to as well but I ignored them. I turned my arms into cannons and blew myself further and further away until I was in the middle of the woods. I fell to my knees and tried my hardest to catch my breath. /p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="c50aab1d72ed8a4aec0fc96b89a6e086"em style="box-sizing: border-box;"Great, just what I need, an anxiety attack./em/p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" data-p-id="2098cbe10233619a0640a252709bba60"I couldn't breath, sobs were chocking out of my throat. I tried to breath but instead when I cried I held in my breath, trying to make it stop. Eventually, with my hands clawing at the dirt of the forest, I took in a few calming breaths and let myself cry. All the pain that I had built up in the past seventeen years was finally unleashing. I slammed my fists into the ground over and over again until I was able to just sit there and breathe. I was surrounded by the nature of Japan and I let nature calm me down and admired the beauty of nature. Trying to collect my thoughts and sort them out so that I could be human again./p
p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin: 0px 0px 24px; font-size: 18px; font-family: 'Source Sans Pro', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px; padding: 0px;" /p