Sirius' mind was flashing through things from the moment he exited the floo. Regulus, his brother had been more relaxed and his magics more relaxed than Sirius could remember. The witch didn't turn to him when he entered and he could feel the tension that he knew he didn't understand as the four of them were in the room together.
It all disappeared now as he stared at the picture and the witch. It was her and it was Prongs, James with his flower's bright green eyes and different glasses.
Harry James Potter, she had said it as if it were a promise. Her best friend and his godson. She had known his godson, James' son. He had died and she had known him because of this boy.
He was grown. Her age, this couldn't have been taken that long ago, she looked so similar to the picture. Except the emotions in her eyes were different. It was moving and he made his eyes focus on it and watch the sequence. His mind wasn't really working, thoughts were just flicking by and not really connecting.
Sirius watched them nearly grin at each other, they loved each other and it was there to see. Then they looked at the camera and it shifted, as if they had seen everything. As if all they had was each other. He could see the heartache in those eyes. Just as he had seen it in James' but they were the most vibrant emerald green. Then he watched the witch carefully and could see different things, heartbreak but also a smouldering kind of determination. With that barely coherent thought, he looked back to the witch and her eyes were blazing at him now.
As he met her eyes, he could feel her magic and it nearly pulled his to meet it. As if she were demanding him, all of him, expected it. This wasn't happening. Prongs and Lily wanted a baby and he wasn't surprised they had one but he could tell this wasn't a happy thing. Her eyes seemed nearly endless, the nearly glowing brown getting smaller as her pupils grew.
"Tell me." He barked the words at her and knew it was rude, you didn't make demands of the Called. She seemed to expect it or it distracted her from her thoughts and her focus came back to him. As if she came back to right now and he desperately wanted to know, even as her eyes told him it was terrible. So much showed in her eyes and her magic.
This witch had been Called and she said she was the boy's best friend. He wasn't really a boy either, not much younger than him, maybe between him and Regulus. There was a slight shadow on his jaw, James had it after about two in the afternoon and Lily teased him about it.
Sirius was still looking at the picture, looking at it again and he realised she wasn't speaking. When he looked up she was more contained and seemed patient. As if she were waiting for him to get it together and be able to listen. Alphard had said this too and so he put the picture on the low table between them, carefully.
The witch, Hermione she had said, nodded at his gentle handling of the image and met his eyes. He didn't know what to say or how to ask any of the hundreds of questions that he had.
"First, I want to know your opinion on what I tell you. Harry wanted me to tell you everything. He knew I was coming, only for two days, but he had opinions and this was important to him. More than anything." He could only nod and wait, feeling as if his life was changing and he didn't know it. Harry, James' son knew she was coming back and wanted her to tell him everything. Sirius felt as if he were waiting for the sword to fall and also as if he were going to have a godson and that was a very strange mix of emotions. He'd had some crazy combinations before but this was a whole other level and the witch had so much of his attention.
Her hair and her face, the lines of her cheekbones and the way she sat in the chair as if she were a queen but not as if she were exactly comfortable. Muggleborn she had said and so maybe it was the robes. This was a fleeting thought as he watched her lips purse and let her look at him, trying to keep still and understand what she was looking for.
This was insane. That played on repeat in the back of his mind. Truth though, his magic knew it and that was as unbelievable as anything else. The witch was Called and belonged to him, to the Blacks, another thing to ignore as her shoulders slumped slightly.
"I don't know if you will believe me. I want to tell you. It happened Sirius, it happened and everyone paid. Everyone. It hasn't happened yet though and when you know more, if you want to know more after, then you will understand it won't happen at all now. I know you will want to know. I don't want you to hate me for it. It doesn't have to happen and you don't ever have to know." He thought she was trying to explain something real to him, and dread pooled in his gut at the emotion in her voice. She didn't like it, didn't want to do this but she knew it would hurt him. He could see that, feel it maybe and her brown eyes showed nearly endless emotions. Eventually as he watched, she settled into a hardness he hadn't seen from her.
"Is this about Prongs?" Sirius knew he was going to ask. He knew it and he thought she did too but he just let this first question come out of his mouth and tried to brace himself.
"Yes." She sounded nearly desperate and he felt as if he couldn't take his eyes off of hers. As if his whole world was bound up in what she had to tell him.
"Can you guarantee this won't happen?" Maybe this question surprised her and she opened her mouth immediately and then stopped. He watched her, fascinated, as she bit her lip and looked away from him for the first time. She was thinking, it was clear and plain to see.
"I can guarantee it won't happen this way. Your knowing will eliminate that. Hell, I will make sure it doesn't happen that way. However I have to do it." Sirius Black watched a witch speak words that were flimsy but her tone and eyes said she would take out the threat if he did not.
"It is the consequences of knowing. I'm sorry." Hermione spoke again before he could.
"This is for Prongs too?" This was the big ticket question and she seemed to know it. Her face softened and she met his eyes again.
"Yes for James. For my Harry too. I want him to grow up with parents and a godfather, with the family he never got to have. I will try to save your House. I will. I will take out Voldemort too, or make sure he is taken out permanently. This is a lot of information, but this part, this part is for James and Lily, for my Harry, for you and Remus too. We can do it. I know we can I just. I'm sorry Sirius." Then she was crying, not sobbing but crying and he wandlessly summoned a handkerchief and watched it leave his uncle's pocket and float toward them.
The man's eyes caught his and Sirius nodded once, they were alright, she was crying but they weren't hurting each other. He wasn't hurting her, she was going to hurt him and she was sorry. He really thought she was and wondered if part of the Calling magic was trust. He knew she spoke the truth, his magic knew and his occlumency shields were good. He had felt nothing from any of the three here the whole day.
End Voldemort, that was crazy and what did she mean, Regulus had been here and she trusted him. What did that mean, she also knew he wouldn't want people around when they talked about this. James, her Harry as she called him. This part was personal and between them, he felt that was what she meant. She accepted the soft piece of fabric and she took a few breaths and then made herself a cup of whiskey with enough tea to keep it hot and ate a small sandwich.
"I've been drinking since I got here. I feel like it's a bit much but the food is good and that's helping. It's been ages since the magics let me taste anything properly." All he could do was nod and try not to ask his hundred questions. He had no issue with her drinking and the teacup was somewhat amusing. Or it would have been if she didn't look as if she were fortifying herself, that was obviously what she was doing and maybe using the small talk to compose herself.
"Do you want me to tell you the story of Harry James Potter first or tell you what happened that put it in motion?" Her careful words and clear thought was enough to have him actually consider it.
"What do you think?" He asked intently and not sarcastically at all. He wanted to know and didn't know the best way to find out. She wasn't sure, her bitten lip and the crease in her forehead said so, and he decided to simplify this. He couldn't think about so much, so much time. That brought up a question though.
"When did you come from?" He had her focus then.
"January 1999." Alright so twenty years from now, they were older teenagers.
"When was he born?" She knew who he meant.
"July 31 1980." Was the answer and she picked up her teacup and curled her legs into the seat. He noticed her shoes on the floor and they were flat, comfortable looking ones but not traditional.
1980. Next year, nine months to grow a baby, hell that was soon. His mind was filling up with questions and he remembered his decision to simplify.
"What happened to James? To Lily? You said he didn't have parents, or even me." This just penetrated his mind, really sank in. He could barely breathe and made himself keep a tighter rein on his magics. Sirius kept his eyes on her face and when she began speaking, it was easier. He could listen but it wasn't anything he had ever imagined or would have.
"Voldemort was hunting the Potters, James, Lily, and Harry. The Order knew from a spy and so they went into hiding. Eventually they went under the fidelius charm and stayed there. You were the obvious choice in secret keeper, everyone would know, so after some time you planned a bluff and changed the plan. Peter would be the secret keeper and be safely hidden, you would take the heat of the hunt. Sirius Black and James Potter would do anything for each other, it was the plan and you did it. It wasn't long, I don't actually know how long it was. You went to check on Peter, he was gone." Her words were mostly even, mostly. As if she were trying to keep from screaming or even moving. Her teacup had gone down at the name of the charm and she was getting steadily angrier. Her hands were shaking in her lap and she still had her knees tucked up on the chair.
Words flashed through his mind. Hunted. Spy. Secret keeper. Bluff. Peter. Gone. He could only be still and wait. No. His mind was screaming at him, no. No no. No. Where was Peter. No. His friends. His Prongs. James and Lily and a baby. No.
"Say it." He growled the words and she didn't flinch but got angrier, he could see it and feel it. His mind was inserting her words about being sorry. He would know.
"So you went. To Godric's Hollow, to the cottage no one should be able to see. It was there and you found James dead and then heard the cry upstairs." She broke off then and Sirius realised he was on his feet.
"No." He roared it at her and she took it. She sat there, tears streaming down her face and she had the handkerchief in her hands. He felt as if he would explode. No. James. His family.
"I'll stop. I'll stop. I'm so sorry Sirius. I am. It happened though." She was nearly pleading and he could see it in her eyes. He didn't want to though, he didn't want to see it.
"He would never." It came out of his mouth and her demeanour changed. It was as if she came to full blown rage in a second. He watched her climb out of the chair and her magic was instantly battering his.
"Don't you tell me he wouldn't. Maybe not right now but he did. He did, and my Harry grew up without parents. He grew up alone and unloved because of him. Because of what he did, because of your rage when he did it. You went to Azkaban and Harry went to Lily's sister. My best friend was unloved and he was hurt. Don't you tell me he didn't do it Sirius Black. I heard him confess, he confessed to Remus and you in the Shrieking Shack our third year. I knew this would happen. I knew you would be so angry you wouldn't hear me." Her wand was in one hand and the handkerchief in the other. He towered over her and let her magics rage against his, felt the pull and the power of it even as she yelled at him.
He knew she spoke the truth. He knew it. He couldn't believe it. Peter. James and Lily dead. Remus. The Shrieking Shack. Third year. Unloved. Her Harry had been unloved and her absolute anger and sadness. It matched his own and he didn't know what to do.
"No." He finally said out loud, all of his words having been in his head. He was crying. He realised it when the tear slid down his cheek and he watched her as she pulled herself back from him and stared at him.
Her chest was heaving and her eyes were nearly haunted. He could see that this was important to her, maybe as important as it was to him and he didn't know what to do. He felt trapped in his mind and his feelings. All he could do was stare at her crying face and the knowing there, the anger and the knowing.