Chapter 9: Lie Or Lament

Even after we had returned, Viserys refused to release my hand.

Otto had been urging him to execute Daemon, and Rhaenyra had come to express her joy of seeing my innocence proved (although technically it wasn't proven), but nothing was as comforting as his embrace.

He... he called me 'my love'.

I felt my cheeks heating up again just thinking about it.

He had only called me 'Alicent' before, didn't he?

It's stupid, stupid, stupid. He's talking about the original Alicent, not me. I knew that, but at the same time, I recalled what Daemon had said.

"You want someone to tell you that, someone to praise you and proclaim his love for you."

He... wasn't wrong. Now that the right person had told me that...

No, I shook my head, I couldn't do this. I couldn't—

"Alicent?" Viserys looked at me worriedly, "Why did you suddenly shake your head?"

"Ahh, nothing, just..." I didn't know what excuse to give him and just smiled in the end.

He too smiled, "You must be exhausted. Do you want to return to your chambers?"

"Yeah..." He's looking at me with so much love in his eyes that I couldn't bear to face him. We walked, hand in hand, like a pair of true lovers.

When we had arrived, he gallantly kissed my hand, "Good night, Alicent."

Then he released me. He was going to leave, but I called behind him, "Viserys!"

He turned, a gentle smile on his face, "Yes, my love?"

He's making me blush again. "What's with you today... you usually aren't so... sweet."

"With... Daemon," There's hidden resentment when it came to his name, "I realized that I wasn't providing you with enough safety. I should tell you more about what I feel."

I lowered my head, "Viserys, I... I'm glad that you trust me. But I don't... I don't love you yet." At least, I didn't believe what I had for him was... that. Not yet.

He stared at me— then forced out a smile, "I should know that," His tone was stiff.

"But!" I quickly added, "I'll try my best... to remember, or to... love you." This was the best I could do.

If I could never return home... then one day I would have to accept being his wife. And he... was someone I could love.

I never thought I would say that. A lifetime ago, I despised him for causing the Dance...

And now he's here, looking at me with those moisty eyes. "I, too, will do my best to make you love me." He said softly.

"Thank you..."

Then, almost naturally, he pulled me close and kissed me again, this time on my lips.

It's a short, chaste kiss, and he released me right after. "See you tomorrow," He said and left.

"See... ya..."

Once he was far gone, I started mumbling, "Ehh, aha..."

This was my first proper kiss...

"Ehhahhhha!" I screamed and hid my head in the pillow.

What's with me now... this was so stupid, so dumb...

Hitting my bed, I couldn't stop mumbling.

Thanks to this, I didn't fall asleep until midnight.

—

"What?!" I cried out, "Daemon escaped?!"

"It seems that Grand Maester had released him from his confinement, believing him to be innocent," Viserys told me, clearly suppressing a headache, "He claimed to have damning evidence against you but refused to tell unless we meet him together."

"There's no 'damning evidence' because all I have said is true," I sighed, "But fine, let's hear what he has to say."

The old man was in chains as he was dragged in front of us, surprisingly calm despite facing certain death.

"We're both here now, speak maester," Viserys demanded.

"Alone," The maester said, his eyes surveying the rest of the room, "This is a great secret, your grace. A great scandal."

Viserys hesitated, but eventually said, "Fine. Guards, leave us."

Once the room was clear, the maester whispered, "Your Grace, the woman sitting beside you isn't the Queen. She's a witch sent to destroy you."

...I didn't like where this was going.

"You're mad," Viserys said, his hand gripping on the pommel of blackfyre.

"She's only maintaining her look with glamour! Since I discovered her secret, I've been watching her closely... she's attempting to pit you against Prince Daemon!"

"Enough!" Viserys shouted.

The old maester ignored him and continued, "Check her right hand! It shows the hole of her glamour. Her pinky is crooked—"

His sentence was cut off after a flash, his head fell on the ground, blood rushing out his neck.

"You... you don't have to... kill him..." I stuttered, feeling ill. The dead man's eyes seemed to follow me as his head rolled on the ground.

My pinky... I was indeed born with crooked pinkies on both hands, but as Alicent, I had seen my new hands; all fingers were straight. If he knew how I was originally, then—

Viserys caught my right hand in his, "This is nonsense, he has gone mad, your finger is—" He paused as he touched my pinky; it looked straight under the gloves, "Your finger..."

Oh, so that's why the old man had been so interested in examining my hands... and why I always felt comfortable with my body despite being self-inserted.

My body was my original one, it's just my appearance that looks like Alicent Hightower. That day when I found myself on the Targaryen's breakfast table... she was replaced by me completely, both body and soul.

"Ehh... I..." I never knew... and this secret had to come out right now, at the worst moment...

As if electrocuted, Viserys released my hand suddenly and stared at me desperately, "This isn't true... tell me this is all a lie," He all but begged, "This is something he... Daemon and he had made up..."

"..." Unconsciously, I touched my pinky too. How come I never noticed it before? It's the same arc I had always known.

"Look at me!" He grabbed my chin and forced me to face him, "Tell me! Are you lying all along? You can't be, you... you're Alicent, no matter how I look at it!"

"No, I... eh..." That wasn't a question I could easily answer. Continue to lie... or to tell him the truth?

With my stammering and sniffing, his expression changed: from desperation to rage, then to sorrow. "You don't know anything about this, do you?" He whispered, "He must have done something to you... to erase your memories and affect your body. Right?"

I should have nodded, should have agreed with his delusions. Instead, I stood there, only staring at him with frightened eyes.

"Just say it, tell me you know nothing," He urged, "I'll find Daemon out and get rid of him. No one will know about this and we can live happily together, with Rhaenyra and our children—"

I couldn't... lie to him forever.

"I'm not born as Alicent Hightower," I blurted out, "I remember another life in another world."

"Huh? What... are you saying..." He stared at me, his face twitching.

I should have lied, but now that I had said it, I couldn't hide anymore. I couldn't... I couldn't continue to lie to him. "I spent twenty-two years living on... living on earth before I came here. That day Syrax ate my arm, I found myself in—"

He grabbed my shoulders and shouted into my ears, "Stop! You're... you're Alicent... you aren't some... imposter..."

"I..." I wanted to tell him I was whom he loved, to accept this lie, and go back to normal. I didn't want to hurt him more than I already did, but... "I..."

"Believe in yourself! And as long as you can, don't stop believing!"

I needed to... be myself.

"I'm not Alicent. I'm not the woman you married." I said clearly, "I'm sorry."

This was my end. No doubt, I would soon be executed, one way or another. Otto and Viserys would do their best to find the real Alicent. I just wished Rhaenyra and my... Alicent's children would continue to get along well...

I looked at Viserys, waiting for him to deliver judgment. Killing me, or putting me into the black cells...

Yet he only stepped back, trembling, his eyes locked at mine. "He must have done something to you." He said with certainty.

"No...?" He... he needed to face the truth... "At least, I think he's innocent..."

"He lied during the trial. He must be working with Daemon." He said, his face flushed red, pacing animatedly, "Yes, it's Daemon! Runciter poisoned you under his order, then he came back here to take advantage of you! It all makes sense now!"

How much was he deluding himself, and how much did he truly believe? "I..." It's harsh, it's cruel, but seeing him like this hurt more than him ordering my execution, "I'm not your wife. You... you've seen my pinky. I'm sure other parts of my body won't match my look if you touch it... face the truth, please."

But he wouldn't hear me, "I won't believe it. Last night, I saw... no, even now, I can see that you love me. It's all written in your eyes... and that's because you're Alicent."

He thought that... I loved him?

...Maybe I did, after all. Maybe this was how it's.

But that only meant that I had to open his eyes.

"I wish I can lie to you and tell you I'm her. But you deserve to know the truth." I shoved my right hand in front of him, "Go on, touch it. My hand... not just my pinky is crooked, my middle finger is also shorter than normal because it lacks the middle part." I knew the defects of my body by heart.

He eyed my hand but refused to pick it up, "No," His voice broke, "You're... you're sick. I'll have to put you to rest until you recover," He pushed me away and called, "Guards!"

"Huh? No, wait! Viserys, listen to me!" I cried, but he ignored me no matter how I begged him. Soon, I was taken back into my room, the door locked behind me.

I stared at the door. What would Viserys do?

He... he wouldn't let me to not be Alicent, I could see that now. He wouldn't accept that he had spent a whole year loving the wrong woman and abandoning his wife.

He wouldn't let anyone ruin his fantasy. He would keep me here until I told him what he wanted to hear...

"Ahaha..." I started to shiver. I hadn't realized he had such potential before... it's kind of ironic, wasn't it?

I used to write about women being imprisoned in my stories, and now I was one of them.

To think that I was so happy to see Daemon dragged off after the trial, and just one day later it's my turn. I was such an idiot.

"..." Otto would soon demand to see me, and he would only be the first out of many. How did Viserys plan to deal with that? I had no idea.

...Should I tell him he's right when he comes back later?

"If I fall back so easily, what's the point of telling him the truth in the place..." I murmured to myself.

Besides, I swore that I'd be myself.

I needed to stay determined.

—

However, he wasn't alone when he came back.

"Lord Strong? And you're..." Coming in with Viserys were his Hand and a woman I had never seen before. She's around my age, with long black hair and an amused expression on her face.

Viserys stared at me, his face paled like a ghost. "Lyonel brought his daughter to me... she has some interesting insights."

"Lyonel's... daughter..." I should have seen all of his children at court before even if I couldn't recall their names, but she, I didn't recognize. But that would mean... she's—

"Yes, it's just as you thought. I'm Alys Rivers," She said, her voice as smooth as silk, "I've been longing to meet you... Amy Chow."

She knew my real name.

"I know everything about you, Interloper." She smiled.

—

Disclaimer: No, that's not the author's real name.