Warning. I Do Not Own Golden Girls, Marvel, Stephanie Plum Series or It's Character. The plot is mine, and in an alternate universe so is Hugh Jackman. Please review if you are reading. Tell me if you love it or if you hate it.
Warning. I Do Not Own Golden Girls, Marvel, Stephanie Plum Series or It's Character. The plot is mine, and in an alternate universe so is Hugh Jackman. Please review if you are reading. Tell me if you love it or if you hate it.
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. It was time to start getting ready for the funeral. Sophia and Edna had just gotten off the phone with Eric, and Edna was none too pleased that she was unable to speak to Eric. The last words spoken to Eric were the both of them asking if he was able to make it to the funeral. They also wanted to see him afterwards. "So my dear," he asked Sophia "will I see you after the funeral." Edna giggle like a highschool girl while Sophia cleared her throat. "Well Eric I suppose so. I just need to clear it with my warden." Eric scoffed."Why the Sophia I remember was a wildcat who took what she wanted. The Sophia I remember answered to no one. Where is that spunk? Maybe you're not the woman I remember, the only human I have ever admired perhaps no longer exists." He said in a dismissive manner.
"Look here, Lehnsherr, I have more spunk than you would know what to do. Just you wait and see." Sophia stood and practically yelled into the phone."I will see you at the funeral, from there we can hit Wolfie's for an egg cream." He chuckled seductively. "See you there, my dear." With that Sophia hung up. She looked at Edna, and took a seat. "I will show him!" She said. Edna nodded in agreement. Sophia opened her purse, taking out a bottle of Nightquil with two straws. She opened the bottle and inserted the straws. Sophia took a swig, and passed it on to Edna. "Cherry flavor. Good stuff." Edna said. "So, how are we going to escape?" She asked. "Easy. We use Rose as a distraction." Edna nodded, as Sophia went over the plans. "Are you going to ever tell Dorothy. She is going to ask alot of questions." Sophia sighed. "I'm not telling Dorothy anything, and neither are you Mazur. Remember, you blab I blab." She took the bottle from Edna's hand, and drank the rest. A bottle and a half later, they were both asleep.
A few hours later, the girls were getting ready for the funeral. "Rose, I am putting you in charge of Ma. I would ask Blanche, but you know funerals..." Rose nodded and dad hey both said "...funerals get her hot." Dorothy nodded. I don't expect her to act up, but Edna has been known to cause a stir at them." Rose nodded. "You can count on me Dorothy." Rose went and grabbed her purse, soon they were waiting on Lula and Stephanie. It was almost time to go when there was a knock on the door. The girls all went to the door when they received a shock to rival all. "Stephanie?! What happened?!" Edna said. "Long story, but you might have to leave without me. We will have to meet you at the funeral." Blanche walked up the them and swiped a finger along Stephanie's arm. "Honey, edible glitter, and a hint of lime." She said. " Why you girls are a mess. Look, last summer we tried making an extra guest room, but all we got was a shower fully made. I use that especially after a night with Mel Bushman...what?? Why are you looking at me like that? It was his birthday. Well anyway, I have a special shampoo/conditioner mix just for this type of problem. Pink bottle on the bottom shelf. We will drop your clothes off. Go round back to the garage." Everyone looked at Blanche in shock as Stephanie and Lula waddled to the garage. All they heard was Lula saying something about how she could have made a fortune off of Blanche on Stark St. Edna just shrugged her shoulders and walked to the car with Sophia.
The women arrived somber to the funeral. The wreath at the door had a picture of Gladys, smiling with a bouquet of flowers. People were already lining up to offer their condolences to the family. Sophia and Edna walked to the casket, stopping by each family member and giving them a hug. They finally reached where Gladys pay, and just stood there with tears trickling down their face. "She is a better place now." Edna said, patting Sophia's arm. The funeral room was filled with many people that Gladys had touched. Sophia looked around and the room, being many familiar faces. Some were from the cloud society, other from Shady Pines, ad on from a past that neither Gladys nor she wanted to speak of. She felt in her bones that he was there, Erick was around hiding somewhere. The funeral ended with Gladys son giving the farewell eulogy. "My mother touched the lives of many of you here, and instead of asking you to come up and say a few words I will just say a few. If everyone came up and spoke we would be here all night. She was a very strong supporter of education and equal rights. She taught for many years at a prestigious academy in Westchester, New York. She will be really missed. If you would like , please get in line and give your final farewell. Also, we are serving snacks and refreshments in the back. Please join us and share your memories in honor of my mother. Thank you." Everyone stood, waiting their turn to give a final farewell.
In the backroom the family had fruit trays and caterng almost buffetstyle. The servers were in green vests with black shirts, Gladys favorite colors. The girls all went up to Gladys son, and offered their condolences. "Harold, why don't you tell Dorothy about your mother when she taught at Xavier's? My Dorothy is a substitute teacher, and taught there for a whole semester when we lived in Brooklyn." Harold looked at Dorothy in shock and the two began to tell different stories. Everyone else slowly began socializing. "Dorothy, Gladys and I are going to get a plate." Soohinsaid, nudging Edna. "Oh. Yes. AI am famished." Dorothy was very deep in conversation with Harold, as the two walked quickly to the fruit table. "We are being watched."Edna said pretending to look at the food on the table. "I know. Rose was ordered to keep an eye on me. As if." Edna pickedplates up for her and Sophia, both taking a little while to chose which fruit to add. " Do you see him?_ Edna asked again. "Twelve O'Clock. Talking to the guy in the wheelchair. He looks upset. I wonder who one eye is. He is acting like wheels' body guard." Edna nodded. "Looks like wheels is sending one eye to get some food." Edna said. Just then the man in question came up to where Sophia and Edna we're standing. "Ladies." He said giving a nod as he grabbed a plate. Neither woman acknowledged him as he just stood there. Sophia and dna kept their eyes on the man behind one eye, but he was blocking their view. "Hey. Sonny." Sophia said. "Can you do an old lady a favor?" He leaned in closer not saying a word. " Can you move the hell out of the way. You are blocking my view! I am trying to get my boyfriend's attention!" The man began to sputter."Yeah! One eye! You're cramping our style." Edna chimed in. A man with wild hair walked up to one eye. "Hey. Scooter! Old girlfriend? I always knew you had a thing for old ladies." He began to laugh." Mind your own business Jimmy!" Sophia yelled, pointing her finger at him. Jimmy? Hey! Lady! The name is Logan." Edna scoffed. "He is actually going by that name. Huh. Looser!". Sophia kept pointing her finger at him, but kept her voice down. "I work alone." Scooter, as Jimmy had called him chuckled, putting an arm around Jimmy's shoulder. "More like your old girlfriend." Sophia grabbed a few grapes, as did Edna and slowly began walking to wheels and a greyhaired gentleman. "He wishes one eye. Oh. And Jimmy, just so you know I faked it. Oh! Baby! Oh! Baby! Oh please!! Vicky was better." With that the two ladies walked away, only hearing a sound of pain and a grunt by the men behind them.