Donnie took a breath of relief. It was his first day back, training alongside his brothers. Splinter finally approved him and Mikey to train again.

The purple banded turtle looked at the scars along his wrists and the new ones left by Shredder. A permanent reminder of what happened, of his depression, his sacrifice for his brother's life, Mikey's screams. When he closed his eyes he could still hear it. Mikey begging Donnie to be okay, Raph screaming in horror as he realized what his brother did for him, nothing from Leo. He imagined the eldest couldn't process what happened, or maybe he was trying to be strong for the others. He never asked and didn't plan to. No one needed any more reminders than what they were given.

6:55 a.m.

Donnie left his bedroom, knowing better than to be late for his first day back in the dojo that didn't involve strict meditating. Splinter was already there, as was Leo, who was perfecting the katanas. He was never able to figure out what went on in the leader's head, no one could. Leo was a mystery on purpose. He always wanted to be strong for his brothers.

"Good morning, Donatello. How are you feeling?" Splinter asked, drawing the attention to the brainiac.

"I'm well, Sensei. Glad to be back," Donnie answered with a smile. Moments later, Raph and Mikey came in. Mikey was practically shaking with excitement and unused energy.

"Good morning, my sons. Since it is the first day back, I think we will just have a sparring session. Who would like to go first?"

The training session lasted a couple of hours, ending with all of the brothers defeated by their father. Donnie noticed Splinter pulling his punches more than usual. After the incident with the Rat King ages before, he knew Splinter had been going easy on the brothers, but even more so today. Maybe it was because Mikey and Donnie were just recently healed.

After training, they all had breakfast together.

"April is picking me up some canvases and paint later today. Does anyone need anything?"

"No, are we going Topside tonight?" Mikey asked after Leo. For a moment, no one spoke.

"I do miss Topside. It would be nice to get some fresh air," Donnie said.

Raph and Leo had gone on patrol a couple of times since the incident, but nothing like before. Crime was starting to go up in the city without the vigilantes' help.

"We can," Leo said. "It may be good for all of us. Getting back to normal."

"Just don't do anything stupid while we go up," Raph said.

"I think this will be good for all of you," Splinter says.

"Again, as long as no one does anything stupid," Raph repeated.

"Why are you looking at me?" Mikey asked.

"Really want me to answer that question?"

Mikey looked over at his brother, almost offended with a pout and Donnie laughed. Leo shook his head while he took his plate over to the sink and began doing the dishes. The tension that had suffocated the family for weeks was finally fading. Raph hadn't had an outburst, Donnie and Mikey were healing fine and seeing his brothers' conditions improve did more for Leo than anything else.

Splinter studied his sons, their laughter filling the room once more. Raphael had his arm wrapped around Michelangelo, Donatello was beside them with a laugh and Leonardo was finishing up the dishes. When he was done, he joined his brothers and sat beside Donatello, still guarding over the three, almost as if he were afraid this was some sort of dream, a reality that would break if he didn't protect it.

While his brothers viewed him as mystery, Splinter could see clearly through his son, his fears, his desires. If only Donatello had been so easy to read, maybe he could have done something sooner.

But there is no changing the past, Splinter reminded himself. There is no changing what has happened, and all the family could do was move on and heal.

"Come on, guys! It's almost time for patrol!" Mikey's voice echoed through the lair a few hours later. In his bedroom, Raph puts down his weights. He glances over at a picture of his brothers in the room. He had to get a new one since Slash had clawed out each brother's face in his previous one. Thinking about it still gave the red banded turtle a slight panic attack. He would still get the nightmares of watching his brothers get hurt by something he loved and cared for.

Maybe Donnie isn't the only one who still needs healing.

Raph shook the thought away and carried himself to the living room, where his younger brothers eagerly awaited his arrival. Truth be told, he didn't want them going to the surface yet. They just healed physically. With the surface came danger. But if he worried about the danger his brothers would be in, he would never sleep.

"Ready to go?" Leo asked the group. Each nodding, they went to the surface.

"I'm so excited!" Mikey exclaimed from the rooftops.

"It's nice to get some air," Donnie agreed. Raph watched each of his brothers cautiously and their surroundings, more so than usual. He kept his hands close to his weapons, ready at any moment to jump in, not to let anything ever hurt them again even though he knew he could never protect them completely. Not with the lives they lived.

"Hey, D, since you're going to be in the lab anymore, is it possible to make us invisible?"

"I'm a scientist, not a magician," Donnie responded to his younger brother fondly. A smile grew on the purple banded turtle's lips and Raph wondered what exactly was going through his mind.

"Don't go confusing real life with your videogames again, Mikey," Leo responded.

"You guys have no faith in me!"

"We know you," Raph responded with a laugh.

"Can we get a pizza after this?"

"Is there ever a time you're not thinking about food?"

"I'll let you know," Mikey responded. Ahead of them, Leo stopped, pulling out his katanas and signaling them to wait.

"Do you guys hear that?" he asked, in a hushed voice. Raph stepped toward his younger brothers and listened closely. There was a ticking. Now able to fully hear the sound, Leo spun around. "Everyone, move!"

But it was too late. An explosion came right beneath them, causing each of them to fall into the abandoned factory building with a thud. Raph felt his head spinning and glanced over to see Leo standing up, ready to fight. He tried to do the same, but when he stood his vision blurred and he fell back down. Where were Mikey and Donnie? Where did Leo go?

"Well, well, haven't seen you guys in quite some time," Tiger Claw's voice breaks in the air. Finally clear headed, Raph turned around and saw the enemy there, with the usual smirk he carried. Donnie was the first to attack, seemingly unaffected by the fall. Leo came in close behind, then Raph and Mikey. Tiger Claw grabbed Donnie's bo staff, lifting the turtle with it and tossing him into Raph, who in return caught him to the best of his ability and then they both went back to the fight.

"What do you want?" Leo demanded.

"Shredder has put out orders against you and your brothers, young turtle. We haven't seen you since you rescued Donatello," Tiger Claw answered. Each brother surrounded him. "Tell me, are you fully healed, Donatello and Michelangelo? Shredder mentioned how damaged your leg was, Michelangelo."

"Enough!" Leo snapped.

The eldest attacked, hitting Tiger Claw with his katanas, but before he could do much damage, Tiger Claw grabbed Leo's torso and threw him across the way, then grabbed Mikey and threw him into Donnie. None of his brothers stood up, so Raph attacked with everything he could. He managed to get Tiger Claw unbalanced and then he swept under his leg and got him on the ground. Aiming his sias at his enemy, Raph glanced behind him to see if his brothers were okay, but only Leo stood. He was beside the youngest members of the team.

"Raph, we need to go. Now," Leo ordered. Without the normal argument, Raph grabbed a smoke bomb and threw it on the ground. He grabbed Mikey while Leo grabbed Donnie and the brothers disappeared to another rooftop, hiding within the shadows.

"Are you two okay? We weren't ready for a fight, this was a bad idea," Leo said. Mikey sat up and saw the looks of concern from the two eldest and sighed.

"I'm good. D?"

"I'm alright, guys. Just caught off guard."

"Yeah, my leg wouldn't work after he threw me into Donnie. I couldn't get up," Mikey said. Leo stood guard as the wind swirled around them. "Look, we're sorry. We know you guys are stressed and we're not trying to make it worse."

"No, no, it's not your fault. We're just getting back to normal and there are going to be adjustments."

"Can we call it a night?" Raph asked. Leo looked over at him and then nodded.

"Probably for the best."

Donnie Entry 9

Things are slowly going back to normal, but not without a few bumps in the road. We're training again and we were even allowed to go on patrol, but we ran into Tiger Claw and Mikey and I aren't as strong as we used to be. I know we have a long way to go, but it is nice to have some of our normal back.

Raph and Leo are still being overprotective, more so than usual. Raph especially seemed on edge today after he locked himself in his room. I don't know how to read either of them, but I'm sure everything will be fine. We have grown closer as a family. They're not going to do anything that could get us back on a dark path. We are going to figure this out together.

Mikey Entry 9

Today was the first day there wasn't any tension, until we got home after Donnie and I got hurt going Topside. Given the circumstances, I would say Leo and Raph took it pretty well. Raph seemed ready to kill Tiger Claw and Leo looked freaked out when I woke up from the impact, but we all got out of there in one piece, which is all that matters.

Donnie did seem shaken up to see me get hurt, but he's gotten better about trusting that I can handle my own. I'm just hoping my brothers are okay, all of them. I hate seeing them like this.

Raph Entry 9

It's alright. They're okay.

I dreamt about Slash again last night. The way he hurt Donnie and Mikey. Only I couldn't save them this time. They were killed because of me and how badly I used to talk about them to Spike. I woke up and I swore I could still hear both of them screaming to save them.

It's not the first time they've been in danger because of me and my mistakes. It won't be the last either. Not with the enemies we have, not with this temper I have, nothing could make it possible to completely protect them.

Sometimes I wonder if the way I talked to him contributed to Donnie's depression. I get angry and I can't control what I say sometimes, and even though regret can eat me alive I never apologize. Even though I've apologized a lot over the last couple of weeks, I'm still worried that there was damage I caused that can never go back.

Leo Entry 9

I shouldn't have allowed them to go Topside so soon, but they have been cooped up in the lair for a while. I don't think there was anything I could have done to improve the situation besides give in. I should have heard the bomb sooner at the very least. It's too dangerous with Mikey and Donnie not being at their full strength right now. They can't defend themselves like they normally can. When is the last time Mikey had to worry about not being able to move his leg?

I was terrified when I went over and saw them both unconscious. Donnie took longer to wake up and by that point, I just wanted to get them out of there.

No, Leo. There's nothing you can do about it now. The past can't be rewritten. You just have to move forward.