the following is a fan-based parody, Dragon Ball Z Abridged is own by team four star, please support the official release
"characters talking"
-show talking-
The following is a fan-based parody. Dragonball, Dragonball Z, and Dragonball GT are all owned by FUNimation, Toei Animation, Fuji TV, and Akira Toriyama. Please support the official release.
(scene opens up with Gohan trying to wake up Piccolo, who is unconscious from Nappa's attack last episode)
-Mr. Piccolo, wake up! You have to stop him!- said Gohan while Piccolo just let out some incoherent mumbling
"now they lost Piccolo," said Sunset
-Don't worry, Gohan! Goku's never let us down! I'm sure he'll be here any second!- said Krillin
"yeah Goku is going to be there in no time," said Rainbow Dash
(scene cuts to Goku eating food at Princess Snake's castle at Other World)
-Thanks for the food again, Princess Snake!- said Goku with his mouth full
they all stared blankly at the screen before screaming in unsound "are you serious Goku?"
-Well, it's the least I could do for trying to eat you like that. But I thought there was... something else you had to do? Something about Saiyans...and the Earth?- said Princess Snake
(Goku gulps down his food and takes a long pause)
(scene cuts to Goku running on Snake Way)
-Crap! Crap! Crap! Crap!- said Goku
"he really forgot I can't believe this" said Pinkie in complete disbelief
"I'm starting to think Goku isn' the hero," said Applejack
[OPENING SEQUENCE]
(scene shifts to Gohan still trying to wake up an unconscious Piccolo)
-Mr. Piccolo, get up! Please, get up! Seriously, he's gonna kill us!- said Gohan
-Well, the green guy's out. Too bad. Guess I'll have to find someoneelseto play with!- said Nappa
-Please not me! Please not me! Please not me! Please not me!PLEASE NOT ME!!!- thought Krillin
"you want him to punch the kid?" asked Fluttershy angry
-Eenie-meenie-minie-(to Gohan)you.- said Nappa
-Wh-What?! AUGH!- said Gohan being kicked by Nappa
(Gohan gets sent flying into a boulder and lands on the ground)
Fluttershy screeched in fear of Gohan being dead
-WHOOO! Not me!- said Krillin-Gohan?- said Krillin noticing that Gohan isn't getting up-Uh-oh! Thought that would have lasted longer!- said Krillin as Nappa turned to him
"KRILLIN," said Fluttershy raising her voice
-Midget's next!RHAAAA!!!- said Nappa charging towards Krillin
-Wait! My turn! My turn! My turn!- desperately said Krillin
-Oh!- said Nappa stopping dead on his tracks
"it actually worked?" asked Twilight
"I just don't even try to make this have any sense," said Rarity
-What-- Nappa, what are you doing?- asked Vegeta
-It's his turn, Vegeta. I have to wait for him.- said Nappa making Vegeta stammer in complete confusion while his nose started to bleed
-You okay, Vegeta?- asked Nappa
-Yes just...just an aneurysm out of sheer stupidity...- said Vegeta
"Nappa is just that annoying I don't blame him," said Sunset, and the rest of the girls agreed with her
-Wow, didn't think you were that stupid, Vegeta.- said Nappa making Vegeta scream in frustration
-Nine minutes, eighteen seconds... Nine minutes, eighteen seconds...- said Vegeta struggling to retain his temper
"I think Vegeta is going to lose it," said Pinkie getting a little scared of Vegeta
-What's that, Vegeta?- asked Nappa
-Happiest...moment...of...my life.- said Vegeta
-Hey! STOP TREATING ME LIKE A JOKE, DAMMIT! I've got a new technique-- said Krillin charging his new technique-Which I probably could have used earlier and maybe saved all of our friends' lives... But, that's besides the point! Get ready for my DESTRUCTO DISC!-
"yeah why didn' ya use it?" asked Applejack
"plot," said Twilight
"at least he is doing something, come on Krillin," said Rainbow Dash
-Laaame...- said Piccolo barely alive
-Now, take THIS!- said Krillin throwing the detract disc at Nappa
-Ooo! A frisbee, Vegeta!- said Nappa
-Nappa, no! It's a trick!- said Vegeta
-But Vegeta, Trix are for kids.- said Nappa
"I hate him so much," thought Rarity
-...You know what, Nappa? On second thought, catch it. Catch it with your teeth.- said Vegeta
"even Vegeta is tired of him," said Sunset
-Yay, like a doggy! Bow-- Ow!- said Nappa getting cut in the cheek
-Riiiicolaaaa...- said the mountain climber before the disc cut the top of the plate off-OH, GODDAMN IT!!!-
-Oh no! My face! My precious modeling career!- said Nappa
(Remembers having his photo taken for a Vogue magazine)
"he was a model?" asked Rarity in disbelief and almost fainting
"he actually had an image," said Applejack surprised by this
-You know, I was trying to be a team player.Trying to be a nice guy!- said Nappa charging a blast
-You killed half our friends!- said Krillin
-I said, "trying!"- said Nappa throwing the blast at Krillin
"well you are not very good at it," said Fluttershy
"yeah we could teach you some lessons," said Sunset
-Well you're failing-- Oh, God!- said Krillin before getting hit by Nappa's blast
Krillin Owned Count: 8
-And so are you!- said Nappa
-I'm back!- said Piccolo shooting Nappa in the back
"yes Piccolo is back in the action," said Rainbow Dash
-AAAAAUGH... Iseewhatyoudidthere.- said Nappa
-Now, it's you and me, big guy! And I'm gonna kick your a-- said Piccolo
(Gohan, also regaining conscious, kicks Nappa into a pile boulder)
-Take that, you insufferable f*king simpleton!- said Gohan
"Gohan language," said Fluttershy
"yes Gohan's hidden power is coming to play," said Twilight
-WHOA, Gohan! What the hell?!- said Piccolo
-Oh? Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Piccolo, I didn't mean to snap like that!- said Gohan
-No, stay snapped! STAY SNAPPED--Augggh, goddamn it...- said Piccolo while Nappa recovers from the attack
-You-a-making-me-so-mad!- said Nappa charging up a powerful blast while Gohan is paralyzed in fear
-Vegeta, look, "Imma firing my--"BLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!- said Nappa
(Gohan still does not try and dodge the blast and stands still, paralyzed with fear)
"GOHAN DODGE" screamed Fluttershy before turning away from the screen
"I can't watch," said Rarity closing her eyes
Alright, it's time to redeem myself-- through one final act of redemption.- thought Piccolo running towards Gohan and staying in front of him
"Piccolo is saving Gohan," said Sunset
"Please save him," said Fluttershy turning to the tv a little bit
"don't die," said Rarity opening her eyes
-I'll save Gohan and-- Wait a second, why didn't I just grab him? I can probably still do that now, actually! Yeah, that's it, I'll grab him and throw him out of the way-- said Piccolo before getting hit by Nappa's blast -GAAAAAAAAAAH!!-
they were all in shock by Piccolo's action and couldn't even blink
"Piccolo!!!" screamed Applejack
(a giant explosion occurs, which causes a giant shockwave)
-WAAHAA!!- screamed Krillin
(smoke clears, revealing that Piccolo is still alive, but mortally wounded)
-Yeah, that's right, I cann take anything you can dish o-- said Piccolo-oh, God, there go my organs.- thought Piccolo falling to the ground
-Mr. Piccolo!- said Gohan
"Piccolo..." said Twilight trying to hold herself
-Unh... Gohan...come closer... There's...something...I have to tell you...- said Piccolo weakly
-Is it that you always pictured me as a son, because you can never make your own-- considering you lack the reproductive organs to produce your own legitimate offspring?- said Gohan
"maybe he did..." said Fluttershy with tears forming in her eyes
-Neeeeerrrrrrd.- said Piccolo
-Wh-what?- said Gohan
-Just...shut up and...listen.- said Piccolo
-What is it, Mr. Piccolo?- asked Gohan
-Why...didn't...you...- said Piccolo weakly-DOOOOOOOODGE?!Bleh.- screamed Piccolo at the top of his lungs before dying
-NOOOOOO!!- screamed Gohan with his scream echoing to the lookout
all of their hearts were in severe pain and after Gohan's scream they couldn't hold it in any longer and started crying
"dammit" was the only thing Sunset could say in the middle of her tears
Pinkie paused the video to give everyone a little bit of time to regain their composure and enough time for Twilight to cross off Piccolo's name and then she started the video again
-Ugh! Well Mr. Popo, it seems my time has come. But don't worry, my friend, you can go to Namek and wish myself and the others back with their Dragon Balls. It will be a long and arduous journey, but I'm sure you can-- said Kami
-Bitch, I ain't going nowhere.- said Mr. Popo
-But Mr. Popo, the fate of the entire universe is-- said Kami
-Pecking order!- said Mr. Popo
-But... I... Well then... goodbye, my friend.- said Kami fading away following the death of Piccolo
"wait why did Kami die?" asked Twilight
"maybe he and Piccolo are connected," said Pinkie
-Byyyye.- said Mr. Popo zooming into his eyes
(scene shifts back to the battlefield, with Krillin helplessly watching Gohan mourn over Piccolo's death)
-Vegeta, did you see me kill the green guy?- asked Nappa
-Yes, Nappa, that was a very good kick.- said Vegeta reading a magazine
"and he doesn't even care," said Sunset very angry
-Daww, Vegeta! You weren't watching! Can you at least watch me kill the toddler?- said Nappa
-Ugh, fine!- said Vegeta throwing the magazine at the ground
-GRAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!I'm gonna eviscerate you and use your gastrointestinal tract as a condom while I fornicate with your skull!- screamed Gohan in complete anger
Twilight was thrown aback by Gohan's words while the rest of the girls only wondered what that meant
-What?- said Nappa after a short pause
-I'M GONNA SKULLF*CK YOU! MASENKOOO-HAAAAA!- screamed Gohan firing a masenko at Nappa
"ooooh," said Pinkie
"let's go Gohan show his who's boss," said Rainbow Dash
-AAAAAH!- screamed Nappa
(Nappa deflects Gohan's blast into a plateau)
-Arrrrrgh. Bitch Please!- said Nappa holding his hand
"godammit," said Rainbow Dash frustrated
-I'm sorry, Mr. Piccolo. I-I failed you...- said Gohan
"no, you didn't Piccolo you did your best," said Fluttershy
-You sure did! I uh... I mean...sorry for your loss.- said Krillin
"Krillin," they all said
-Well, it's been fun, kid--I mean, for me, not for you. As for you, everyone important to you is dead.- said Nappa
-Hey, I'm still alive-- said Krillin
-Everyone important!- said Nappa
-Dammit.- said Krillin sadly
-Now, Nappa Smash!- said Nappa raising his foot
"oh no," said Fluttershy
(Gohan and Krillin both close their eyes, preparing for the worst, but Gohan is suddenly moved out of the way before Nappa can crush him with his foot)
-Oo-wa-waa? Hey! Where'd he go! Did he disappear, or was he never there to begin with?- said Nappa while dramatic music played
(Gohan is shown to be on top of Flying Nimbus)
-Oh wait, there he is.- said Nappa
-Huh?- said Gohan confused
"wait that cloud," said Twilight
"that means," said Sunset
(Goku lands, finally arriving at scene of the battle)
"Goku is here," said Rainbow and Pinkie with their eyes sparkling
-Hey, guys! What'd I miss? I-- said Goku noticing the corpses -Oh, are they all... Tenshinhan... Piccolo...? Yamcha? Oh wow, especially Yamcha...- said Goku noticing the Chiaotzu's body is nowhere to be found-Wait, where's Chiaotzu?-
they all lowered their heads in sadness after seeing the bodies of the fallen warriors
-Oh, he's here...and there...and there...and-- said Krillin
-Krillin!- said Gohan
-What?- asked Krillin
-Too soon!- said Gohan
-I'm sorry I'm late, you guys. But I brought some Senzu Beans for you!- said Goku giving them some senzu beans
-Woohoo! Thank you, Ex Machina.- said Krillin
-Hey! Which one of you did all this?- asked Goku
-That was me, totally calling it.- said Nappa making Goku shake in anger-I killed every single one of them-- except for Chiaotzu. He blew himself up!-
"now he is going to get what he deserves," said Rainbow Dash
(Goku continues to shake in anger and begins to power up)
-HHHHAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!- screamed Goku
-Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level?- asked Nappa
-It's...one thousand and six.- said Vegeta taking off his scouter
"Wait that doesn't sound right," said Twilight
-Wha-- really?- asked Nappa
-Yeah, kick his ass, Nappa!- said Vegeta turning off his scouter
-YAY!- said Nappa charging into Goku
(Nappa gets beaten to pulp while Vegeta, Gohan, and Krillin watch, completely shocked at Goku's beatdown)
-OOOWWW! Ow ow ow ow! Dah! Doh! Dah! Doh! Doh! Doh! Doh!- screamed Nappa while getting pummeled by Goku
"yeah get that," said Rainbow Dash
-Hm, that doesn't seem right...- said Vegeta
-My arm doesn't bend that way! My arm doesn't bend that way!- said Nappa before a loud crunching sound is heard-Oh, now it does!-
"This is a lot more enjoyable than it should be," said Rarity
-Wait, wait, wait, wait... Nappa!- said Vegeta
(Nappa gets knocked over next to Vegeta)
-WHAAAAAT?!- said Nappa in pain
-I had the Scouter upside down.- said Vegeta taking off his scouter once again -It's over nine thousand.- said Vegeta calmly crushing the scouter-Rah.-
"WHAT? over nine thousand, you gotta be kidding me?" said Pinkie surprised
"why do I feel like that is a reference to something?" said Applejack
-Why do you sound so bored?!- asked Nappa
-Because, it's still not a threat.- said Vegeta
-But-- said Nappa
-To me. Besides, once we get the Dragon Balls, we'll just wish for immortality! Then no one will be able to stop us.- said Vegeta
"This guy is going to be one tough challenge," said Sunset
-Wait, what? But you killed Piccolo.- said Goku
"aaaand?" said Twilight
-And your point is...?- asked Vegeta
-Well, if he's dead, the Dragon Balls don't work.- said Goku
-Wh... what?- said Vegeta
"oh because of Kami I assume," said Twilight writing that on her notepad
-Oh, and I totally killed that guy. Oh well, at least we still had fun getting here, right, Vegeta?- said Nappa making Vegeta growl in anger-Vegeta? Remember the bug planet?- said Nappa receiving more growling from Vegeta-Vegeta? Vegeta? Vegeta? Vegeta? Vegeta? Vegeta? Vege--
"yeah he is dying," said Sunset
"Vegeta just lost it," said Pinkie
(scene cuts to Nappa getting killed by Vegeta)
-AAAAAAAAAGH!!!- screamed Nappa before getting obliterated in an explosion making Vegeta stare at the sky with an evil smirk
"I don't any pity for him at all," said Rarity
"me too," said the rest of the girls
[ENDING SEQUENCE]
"There isn't even a post-credit scene like in the others this is getting serious," said Pinkie
"put the next episode Pinkie is time to see the end," said Twilight
Pinkie nodded and pressed play