Thank you so much for reading my story. I'm sorry if i'm making you wait for so long before publishing a chapter. Because of the online lectures I don't have much time and the quarantine is dragging my mood down. It's kind of difficult for me, and maybe for others too. But i try my best to stay entertained and focused! Also have a nice day and night everyone, i gotta tootleyyy...
Chapter 8 - Not a monster
« But that's not it, is it? If yes, then why would we tie Finn up?…He was in the plan too huh? » Kol Has so many emotions going through him right now, starting with disbelief, pain, sadness, betrayal but mostly anger and it's really hard to contain himself.
Slowly approaching him, Anastasia puts her hand on his shoulder, trying to soothe him. « Kol…y-yes, he was in the plan too but- »
« So that's how it is? Momma's boy always doing what she says? You never cared about us! Only you! », he yells, cutting her off.
« Never cared? NEVER CARED? DON'T YOU SEE WHAT KIND OF MONSTER WE ARE? We shouldn't have existed. WE'RE abominations! You and our siblings have killed thousands of people, if not millions. You are not controlling your thirst, Elijah the hypocrite noble man, hiding behind his word to justify everything. Rebekah, a capricious little girl. Above all Niklaus, a hybrid that shouldn't have been. We're monsters Kol, WE ARE! » Kol is suddenly in front of him, gripping his throat, squeezing it. He's looking at him with such a murderer look, that Finn knows right there and then, he wants to kill him.
Anastasia walks fast to Kol, pleading him to let Finn. « Kol, stop! KOL! STOP »
« Stop? Didn't you hear what he told us, what he said about us? »
« I know I heard, but stop! » Turning so she's facing him, she grabs his face with her tiny hands, moving his head so he looks at her. « Hey…hey look at me…re-remember what I told you in the car right. Kol! You have to remember. I made you a promise, and I will keep that promise you hear me. »
Both Jeremy and Finn are looking at the scene with surprise for different reasons. Jeremy is for how he sees that his sister cares about people even though she doesn't personally know them. Where as Finn, is for how Kol's eyes softened while looking at Anastasia meaning she has an impact on him.
Although he's still angry, Kol found his anger diminished by Anastasia, by her face, by her voice, her eyes and her promise. You know, in my world I would have never done something like this because I hate promises. But, to you Kol Mikaelson : I promise, I give you my word that one day, you and your siblings will know happiness again. Even if I die. You will live and feel it. You deserve it because even if you're a monster, to every monster is a beauty. And come on, "What would an ocean be without a monster lurking in the dark? It would be like sleep without dreams."
And so he remembers, they were just 2 miles away from Denver when she said that out of the blue, and in response he mocked her, but she held her ground. So he decided to let go of Finn and just look at her a moment, then get out of the room. Not going far away, just to the kitchen to occupy his mind. Leaving Anastasia to sigh, she turns to Jere, checking to see if he was okay, then goes back to Finn.
« Finn Mikaelson, second born of the Mikaelson family, older brother of Elijah, Klaus, Kol, Rebekah, you are here today so you can redeem yourself. » ' Oh my god, I sound like a priest.'
« You see as an older and little sister, it is completely unbelievable that I, a mere human as you vampires call us, find myself scolding one of the originals, who has failed his family, failed his duty to protect his own blood, his little brothers and sister from the hurt that, not only their father BUT mother also did to them, failed at being a figure which the others look up to. You have failed Finn. »
« Who are you to judge me, to speak to me in such a manner. Vampires are bad, monsters and mother and I-»
« But that is where you wrong Finn… », she pauses. Then goes on again.
« Finn you're NOT bad, you may be a vampire but you're NOT a monster. Whatever your mother told you is a lie Finn Mikaelson. You are not an abomination of nature Finn. Why? Because if you were, you and your siblings would have been dead the moment you became vampires. It is true your vampirism comes from magic but what your excuse of a mother did not point, was the fact that nature balances itself, it always finds a way to keep the balance. Finn, your mother went against the dead witches' choices for you to be safe, but when you came to life again did you not find out the sun was your enemy, as well as the white oak tree, by allowing you to live Finn, nature deprived you of enjoying the sun, but also a way to die as any other being's life is in the world. You are still human, vampirism did not make you a monster, an abomination, you live, you eat, you love, you cry, make mistakes, nothing changed Finn. »
Finn finds himself tearing up, as he listens to her. Thinking about every moment he spent with his family, his sister and brothers. The things his mom would tell him.
« Finn, I know how it feels, not having a choice to become something you never wanted, but you don't have to act upon it. You becoming a vampire does not mean that you are no more Finn Mikaelson, an older brother and a little one at the same time. You can decide who you are and how you are Finn. Don't let your mother's lies stop you from living, from loving yourself because you are not a monster, you do not need to be a vampire to be a monster. Vampires are no different from men, it's not because an eclipse is rare that it is not common. »
At this point, Mikaelson is full of crying, regretting what he has done and what he was about to do.
« W-what have I done. I-I couldn't - I couldn't protect them back then, Niklaus, Elijah, Rebekah, Kol…Henrik. What did i-i do? », he says, feeling a deep pain inside.
Anastasia moves to free him, as she recognised the look in his eyes : regret, guilt, sadness and deep pain. With the dagger she cuts the rope and then moves back, watching as he slides down to the ground, putting his head in his hands.
« Hey…it's okay Finn, you didn't know, you couldn't help it. You can't change the past, what has been done is done. But you can act in the present to change the future. There's always hope Finn and I'm sure your siblings can find in them the strength to forgive you. » Finn looks up at Anastasia, understanding her words, thinking about what he will do.
Kol has been in the stairs, frozen, listening to her speaking to his brother. He was shocked at everything she said. She believes they're not abominations, and weirdly enough he finds himself believing her. His mind grasping her words like he was drowning in a river desperately grasping a branch as his only hope. But he was more shocked at hearing his brother cry, he doesn't remember the last time he cried. Snapping out of his thoughts, he goes back to Jeremy's room.
Finn turns his head from Anastasia and looks at the door, seeing Kol enter. He immediately stands up, his body stiff watching with hope and wariness.
« Kol, I-I know that I've been a horrible brother to you…and-and I want to say t-that I'm sorry for everything. For ignoring you, for looking down at you for…for attempting to kill you. I-I didn't- I couldn't-I failed in my duty of protecting you. »
Finn then approaches him, his eyes pleading at him to understand and to possibly forgive him. He puts his hand on his brother's shoulder and adds, « can you forgive me brother for what I have done? »
Kol looks at him too, with tears in his eyes, he knows that he can't forgive him right away. How can he, he's been betrayed so many times and here is Finn, the one whose betrayal would have doomed them all. When he goes to take a step back, he feels another hand on his other shoulder. He can smell Anastasia's scent, chocolate and strawberries with a bit of roses and rosemaries.
« Kol, forgiving is not forgetting, your brother has realised his mistakes and the sooner the better. ''It's not an easy journey, to get to a place where you forgive people. But it is such a powerful place, because it frees you''. »
Sighing, Kol speaks next « I decide to forgive you, brother, because I know I have hurt you too. And I'm still angry for what you and mother had planned, but as a Mikaelson I know that we have all gone against each other's back. But do not think that I'll forget what you've done. Brother. »
« Thank you, and I know that you won't forget but it gives me hope knowing that you really consider forgiving me. », and with that, the brothers hug while both Gilberts are looking with a smile.
As always, Anastasia is here to break the moment . «Aw look at those Originals cuties having a moment… » 'Wait where's my phone I need to capture this'. And as quick as she can, she takes a picture. When Kol hears the snap of a picture, he quickly lets go of Finn, turning and glaring at her. « Way to ruin their moment sister. »
« You know this picture is going to be my wallpaper…And maybe I'll print them out and stick them everywhere! »
« NO! ». he screams, while the others are laughing.
They were all in the Gilberts room at a hotel, discussing the plan, it was already 10pm. Why this late, they couldn't agree on what to order, pizzas, McDonald's, KFC or just snacks. It's the pizza which won.
« So you're all okay with that? », I ask the group after telling everyone their parts, while eating her pizza. Me and Jeremy are sharing one, while Kol and Finn have their own, they wanted different pizzas.
« Yeah…but is it really my part to just stay hidden? », asks her coma-bro.
« Yes because, Elena won't know you are back and if the others see you, they'll tell her. It's also better so I won't worry for you, that OMB can be a real piss off. », I say.
« OMB? », asks the Mikaelsons. « Original motherfucking bitch. », answers Jeremy with a laugh, Anastasia joins him.
« Seriously we are not even in New York and there's that much of a traffic? What is this huh?. », I say being so tired of the honking and such.
« Maze we have just been here for 5 minutes. Relax. », says Kol. Really? « Just? JUST? It is already too much, this car in front of us hasn't been moving for hours… And look at the car, it's a disgustingly ugly yellow car. At least if you want to make people late by pulling a dramatic move, your car needs to have some class. » I say with disbelief. I mean come on it looks like it hasn't been washed for years. I turn to look at the others and see them trying not to laugh, 'Why'.
« What is so funny? This is serious, stall with class and sass too but yeah.. »
« So..sorry sis it's just…you…you're saying dramatic when…you're the dramatic one here. », says my coma-bro, finally laughing his ass off,Kol and Finn as well. I scoff and turn to look at the car in front with a pout 'I'm not dramatic'.
« OKAY THIS IS TOO MUCH, we've now been here for 2 hours, 2 DAMN HOURS! », I burst out, staring at that yellow ugly car, the others jumping at my sudden outburst. « Hey Remy, cover your ears. »
I don't let him the time to question me that I pull the window down, put my head out and yell « Hey!¡Pendejo! ¡Si no mueves tu maldito coche, vendré por ti y lo moveré con tus dientes! Te voy a matar, move your yellow nasty car. Inténtalo y no tendrás más auto. »
I sit back pleased with myself as I hear a honk and see the car move. Not caring about people looking at me, probably seeing me as a crazy road girl. Seeing as we're still not moving, I look at my road trip companions, « Why aren't you moving? HE MOVED, NOW MOVE! ». And Kol abruptly starts driving again.
« I-I don't even…I don't want to know what you said. » says Jeremy. « Man, Latinas are scary. » he adds quietly. I glance at the Sons brothers seeing them nod, agreeing to what my coma-bro said. 'Tch brats'.
We're in a town before our destination, when I see one of the best shops ever: an art shop. Turning to look at Panda with excitement running through me I say, okay more like yell: « STOP! » Which he does…not.
« Kol! Stop, I saw it, I saw it! The best thing ever, did you see it? »
« Darling, we're almost at Mystic Falls. What is it that you're talking about? »
« THE SHOP! The art shop. Come on Kol please. Can we stop here please, Panda…please, please… », I plead, then send a pleading look to Remy. I know he likes art too.
« Yeah, come on man, we'll be quick…Plus it's better for your ears. », adds Jeremy, patting Panda's shoulder. To be fair, they're starting to like each other, genuinely, I heard them talking at 1AM, about what, I don't know, I was still in my dream, swimming in chocolate and feeding my dragons. 'Ahh, what a good time aye'.
Sighing, Kol finally agrees, yay!
« Why do you need these, I told you we have them already and I will give you some. », says Kol with an exasperated look on his face.
« I know already but those are yours, at yours and your family's house. I want mine, not someone's. I want this colour, these designs, I don't want to feel like I owe you, or have to greatly take care of them or you'll have my head. Having my own will make me feel free when using them. Can you respect that? », I explain. You're confused aye, right now we're in a weapon shop or armory and I'm getting myself a crossbow and some red and blue throwing knives. Jere is also getting a crossbow.
We're now in mystic falls on the way to the Gilberts home. Having thought about something, I turn to look at Remy, « You know Remy, when I saw you taking all those pills, I wanted to castrate you. Then put you in a bathtub filled with cocaine, where you would eat it, drink it, then drown in it, eventually if you don't overdose first. But I would bring you back and then repeat again. »
There's a big awkward pregnant pause in the car. Then he says unsure, « Um…would you r-really have done that? »
« Um…well I guess we'll never know, since you don't do drugs anymore huh? », I say chuckling, although I'm serious about it. I hate drugs, medicines, it doesn't matter if I'm sick or not. Drugs are worse than cancer, they destroy you, make you believe in no pain which we all know is bullshit since pain is, will and has always been there from the beginning. And plus, what better way to live and experience at the fullest if not consciously?
« Uh…yeah, I'm not into that anymore. It-it was just a phase. », Jere says chuckling nervously, snapping me out of my thoughts. 'Good then, though I wonder what would've happened if he had a bath of cocaine. Would the substance pass through his pores? Would he overdose then? Uhh, I guess I'll never know now.'
Here for translation
'Hey!¡Pendejo! ¡Si no mueves tu maldito coche, vendré por ti y lo moveré con tus dientes! Te voy a matar, move your yellow nasty car. Inténtalo y no tendrás más auto.'
= Hey asshole! If you don't move your car, i'll come get you and move it with your teeth! I'm going to kill you, move your yellow nasty car. Try it and you won't have a car anymore.'
Thank you , next time for a new chapter, i gotta zaynnnn...!