"Oh hey. You want a cup of coffee?", Ezreal asked as he was already picking up a mug for her from the cupboard.
"..Yes please", her voice was nearly silent.
She just felt so embarassed. He'd seen her. Had he? She'd seen.. him. Had she though? She didn't remember anything even if she did. Most parts of last night were nothing but a blur in her mind.
Something like this.. It shouldn't be that forgettable right?
"Well?" Ezreal asked.
"Well what?", she blinked a few times. "Sorry I wasn't listening", she explained once she realized he had been talking to her this whole time.
"How much sugar?", he said holding onto a little spoon.
"I'll take it black".
Ezreal raised both eyebrows surprised. His hair was a curly mess but he hadn't bothered trying to fix it in the slightest. She had to admit she kind of liked it that way even if Ezreal himself despised his natural hair.
"That's not the usual", he commented on her choice of beverage as she took a seat on the kitchen table. "Here ya go anyway", he handed over the mug with the dark liquid, sitting down on a chair on the opposite side of her.
For a brief second their fingers grazed eachother. Luxanna felt goosebumps at his touch but only managed to say a small "thank you" at his gesture. No matter how much she tried, she couldn't face him or even attempt to look him in the eye. So she just kept her head down. Everything just felt too awkward. She was simply staring at his hands, trying to memorize every little mark and vain on them, thinking that if she did, maybe she could remember these hands travelling all over her body last night.. She shuddered at the thought.
"Please don't be like this..", Ezreal mustered up the courage to say, evidently breaking the long ass silence that lingered between them. His eyes looked tired.
"How can I NOT be like this?", she had practically shouted surprising even herself. She lifted her fingers and started to gently massage her temples. Her head still hurt way too much. "Aren't you angry?", she asked him.
"Why would I be?", the confusion on his face seemed honest. Ezreal was fine with whatever had happened between them last night. Maybe because that was all he was after anyway. The thought made her blood boil as her frustration was reaching its peak.
"You're not huh?", she scoffed with a raised eyebrow. She had finally succeeded in looking at him in the eye. "Right.. Why would you be.. I guess you got what you wanted in the end", her words were dripping with poison.
"Tell me you're joking right now". Ezreal looked at her with what she could only interpret as disdain. "Is this your honest opinion of me? Wow", he slammed the table and walked towards the window. "You really think that I would ever and I mean EVER use you in such a way?", he looked at her across the room. His gaze was piercing through her. She had never seen such a serious expression on his face before. "You may not know me that well but contrary to what you might think, I only sleep with girls that actually want me to".
Lux's eyes were fixated on the mug placed out in front of her. It was a yellow one, with an intricate logo on it. She tried to decipher the meaning of it. It looked very much like some sort of advertisement merchandise.
"You look at me when I'm talking to you!", Ezreal demanded raising his voice slightly.
Lux gulped hard surprised at the sudden change in her roommate's behavior but she looked at him like he'd asked for. She was the one who had started this whole confrontation after all.
"I don't remember everyhing that happened either but we'll figure it out just give me a minute to collect my thoughts", he rubbed his forehead and then his eyelids. His voice sounded more gentle now. Worried even. "Just don't make everything out to be my fault", he exhaled loudly.
"What's that supposed to mean?", Lux stood up and walked over towards the window as well.
"You were drunk as well, weren't you? And the only thing that I remember is you kissing me", he said in a low voice leaning down if only slightly to be in the same height level as her.
Luxanna felt like she was being accused of a crime that she hadn't committed. There was no way that she would ever do that. She saw Ezreal as a friend and that was it. And she just wasn't the type of person who would walk around giving meaningless kisses to just anybody.
"On.. on the lips..?", she mumbled under her breath and took a peek at his lower lip. No. That couldn't have been her.
"Duh", he confirmed her speculation as she was trying to avoid his judging look every way that she could. She just didn't want the colour of her cheeks to betray her.
"There's no way I would ever do that", she spoke up with an out of the blue confidence. She sounded borderline disgusted to Ezreal's ears and a smug expression that read "I'm too good for you" was plastered upon her face.
The blonde boy took a step back as his ego was taking a nearly fatal hit. Was he really the kind of guy that she was making him out to be?
"Wh- Wh- You're acting like kissing me would mean the end of the world", he said in a sarcastic tone. Playing it cool was the only way he knew how to do things. And she wouldn't let him do that. Was she really insinuating that he was that big of a jerk? Was she that disgusted at the thought of them being intimate? "Besides who cares if we fucked? It's not like-"
A blow to the side of his face was ultimately the only thing that stopped him from rumbling uncontrollably.
Lux hadn't realized that she was holding her breath during the entire time he was talking. She had hit him so hard that she could still feel the stinging on her palm. But now.. He didn't say anything anymore. He simply covered his cheek with his hand at the point of impact, wide eyed. His mouth slightly open.
"I care!", she yelled back at him. "I care 'if we fucked'", she used his own words against him praying that her voice wouldn't crack in the meantime.
At the same time the doorbell was ringing loudly.
"I gotta go", she said solemnly then turned on her heels and put on her sneakers as fast as she could. Ezreal was still standing there at a loss, not fully understanding what had just happened.
"Good m-", he heard Caitlyn saying as she was standing at their front door but she had no time to say anything else. Lux picked up her coat and guided the girl out of the appartment as fast as she could.
"What the hell just happened?", he asked himself then sighed as he stared out the window once again. He rubbed his cheek trying to soothe the pain when he noticed Luxanna's phone on the kitchen table.
Since it was the weekend they didn't have time to go out and buy a new one, so Lux was stuck with one of Ezreal's old mobile devices. There were a few cracks on the screen yet despite all that it still worked just fine.
He felt mad. Ezreal wasn't one to get upset over things easily. But for the first time in ages, he felt angry. Yeah sure.. His phrasing might not have justified what he actually said but his head hurt so bad and his ego hurt even worse. The fact that his roommate was so appalled at the thought of them together had pushed him slightly over his limits.
And seeing her phone lying on the table irked him even more.
The sole reason for it was that she was supposed to keep it with her at all times for her safety and she hadn't even followed these simple instructions for 24 hours. He grunted in frustration.
And now all of a sudden Cait was here. Did she call her? He rubbed his jaw. The pain was nearly all gone. Great. So after I hear it from Lux I also gotta hear it from Cait. For things I don't even remember happening!
But damn.. That was a mean hit.. And she was supposed to take the goddamn phone with her!
"Ugh", he slammed his hand on the glass window with his closed fist then sat back on the kitchen table to take another sip of his coffee. He much needed it as a memory flashed in his mind.
Without giving it any more thought he picked up the old cellphone drawing the motif on the screen. It was a simple L shape. Quite predictable but they'd thought that Lux should put something she wouldn't easily forget.
"Photo gallery, photo gallery..", he mumbled as he looked through the menu. He immediately cringed at a blurry image of himself with a play button over it. Drawing a deep breath he pressed it with his thumb.
"Stop recording me Lux!", he was clearly drunk in the video. The red tinge on his face was more than visible even with this bad resolution.
As it seemed, Lux's camera work was also quite terrible since half the video was covered by one of her fingers on the lense.
"No! You're the one who wanted to play this game", she laughed in a weird uncontrollable manner.
It was hard to see much, but he definitely saw himself clutch a couch pillow over his groin.
"That's enough, that's enough!", the Ezreal on the video laughed wholeheartedly, his voice was cracking a lot. He even hicupped a few times. "Isn't it my turn to ask anyway?", he complained.
"Stop being a baby Ez! You asked the previous round!", Lux scolded him with a laugh then pointed the camera to herself. She had a pillow over her chest area as well as it seemed. "So this is my roomie being a sore loser", she explained to the non-existent audience. "One last question and you're done", she turned the camera to film the blonde boy once again. He had pouted his lips mad. "Hm.. Never have I ever practised kissing with a stuffed toy!", she was practically yelling this whole time, probably too tipsy to even realize.
"It was a one time thing!", he saw his drunk self protesting. "I was a teen! I didn't know any better Lux! Don't make me take it off!", he gasped.
"Those were YOUR rules buddy!", the girl's laughter was the only audible part of the video at that point. "Did you really have a stuffed toy as a teen?", she mocked.
"Oh shut up!", the Ezreal in the video yelled embarassed.
"Guess we got him", Luxanna turned the camera on her face and winked mischievously before the video came to an end.
Meanwhile Ezreal blinked multiple times unsure of what he'd just watched. He was sitting there completely dumbfounded. "So that's how it is huh", he shrugged feeling somewhat relieved that nothing out of line had ocurred last night. If anything were to ever happen between them he wanted to make sure he would at least remember it.
But that touch of the lips.. Subconsciously he touched his own with his fingertips. He closed his eyes for a moment there trying to reminisce. Trying to replicate the feeling. But his memory was betraying him. The only thing he was sure of was their lips touching. It left as soon as it came.
His head still felt like someone had beaten it with a hammer but he was going to be alright. His only silver lining was that at least now, he could talk to Lux and sort this whole thing out.
He remembered her slapping him hard moments earlier. He swallowed hard. He wanted to call Cait and tell her to bring Lux back and talk. Face to face. This was nothing but a misunderstanding in the end.
There didn't have to be any awkwardness between them. Things could just go back to normal. Right?
He scrolled through the rest of the gallery and saw that Lux had been practicing taking pictures all through the night. He saw a candid shot of Qiyana with her resting bitchface, Ekko smoking that hookah, Caitlyn drinking a shot. There were a few failed attempts at taking a selfie with Caitlyn probably in the women's bathroom. It looked like his friend had been trying to teach her how to do a proper duckface. The results were nothing but atrocious. He smiled as soon as he saw them.
The only photo she had taken of him, he hadn't even realized she was photographing him at the time. It was him simply sitting next to Ekko and looking towards the stage, his blue eyes reflecting the colourful lights from the projectors. On first glance, it was an instagram worthy shot. He huffed a laugh at the thought.
A feeling of restlessness rushed over him at once. It felt as though he could not sit still for more than half a second. He wanted to clear this whole thing out as fast as he could.
He was never one to like to wait around for things to sort themselves out. He had to go out there and find her. Show her the video of them playing that stupid game. Then she would understand for sure. Wouldn't she? He would explain what happened and then they would laugh it off and move on.
He didn't want her to be mad at him any longer than she already was. Something irked his stomach at the mere thought that things were not cool between them. The overbearing need to make it right ultimately dragged him out of his chair and without realizing it he was already halfway through getting ready to head out.
Caitlyn's patience was already on its last straw. Luxanna was the one who had invited her over, yet she hadn't uttered a single word ever since they had sat down at the small corner cafe. It was the nearest one to Ezreal's appartment and she loved the coffee here. Sett used to work as a barrista here at some point and she liked to come and gawk at him (and his sculptured muscles) at times. Not that she would actually ever admit that to his face.
What's more, her curiosity was killing her. The blonde had admitted to sleeping with Ezreal over the phone and yet there she was fiddling with a pack of sugar and tapping her small spoon on the big mug of coffee witth an aloof look on her face. It wouldn't be that difficult for a passerby to deduce that both girls had a serious case of a disease called hangover. Pretty common around their ages so no one would even bat an eye.
Cait sighed dramatically hoping to make Lux wake up from whatever daydream was on her mind. Probably recounting her steamy encounter with Ez the night before. She cringed at the thought but tried to endure it knowing that she had agreed to become her confidant the moment she accepted her invitation.
Nevertheless, she didn't even get as much as a look from the girl.
"Alright", she decided to break the silence, "I'm here now so give me all the dirty details. I can handle it", she said with smirk across her face then took a big sip of her warm coffee. There was still steam coming out but to her it had just the perfect temperature.
And then she saw the girl's lip twitch violently before she swallowed hard.
Cait crossed her eyebrows in response, taken back.
"Wait, wait, wait. It can't have been THAT bad", her intonation revealed her uncertainty as well as her surprise, but much to her dismay Lux had avoided her eyes like the plague and kept her unbearable silence without so much as taking a sip of her own coffee.
"What's going on?", she asked then paused to collect her thoughts a bit. Her head was hurting her a bit and the fuziness that came with it annoyed her. "Lux? Are you.. okay?", she reached out to touch the girl's hand.
That was the only thing that made the blonde girl find her slightly more interesting than her pack of brown sugar. It didn't take a detective to know that she was on the verge of bawling her eyes out as her lip twitched once more.
"Lux.. what happened?", she asked using the most gentle tone she could possibly muster. "Breathe", she added as she nodded the girl's difficulty.
Lux managed to speak up after following her instructions.
"I.. I.. You're going to make fun of me", she said. Her voice was barely audible even though there was nothing but a small table between them and the music in the cafe served as nothing more than a backround noise.
"I'm not that big of scum", she huffed an encouraging laugh, "I only make fun of Ez, I promise". She couldn't help but notice the disapproval on her face at the sound of her childhood friend's name.
"I don't really.. remember what happened last night. I don't-", she gave up talking with a small sigh then slowly tried to build up her courage. "I only called you here cause I figured that you were the only person I could talk to about this.. I'm sorry I shouldn't have. But I don't know anyone else in this place".
Luxanna kept on rumbling without a halt but Caitlyn never stopped her. It was clear as day: she needed someone to vent to. And she would happily let her have it.
"I'm not even making sense am I?", she buried her face into her palms after a while.
"Can I just say something?", Caitlyn asked hesitantly with Lux giving her a short nod in response. "It was your first time right"?
She was met with wide eyes and a short breath. All clear signs of her hypothesis being right. There was no denying it.
"I didn't want it to be like this", her bottom lip quivered and her blue eyes were glistening as tears started to threaten to fall. "It's stupid".
Caitlyn was starting to feel her blood boil as jealousy started to build within her. For Luxanna reminded her of herself. A couple years back. When she was still living in that pink bubble of hers. Back when boys could actually make her heart beat fast and her knees would shake at the innocent touch of a hand. Back when she fell asleep at night while she would make these intricate romantic/improbable scenarios in her head and the world didn't feel like such a bad place. She craved that innocence. But now there was just no way of ever getting it back. After all.. when you grow up your heart dies. People drain you. Until you're left with too much emotional baggage with the only hope that one day you'll find someone whose traumas fit yours.
"I wanted my first time to be.. special. I wanted to at least remember it", she rubbed her eyelids with her slim fingers.
So she still had those dreams. Of love. Caitlyn felt bad for wanting to take that away from her. She wanted to explain that this was reality. This was not some fantasy fairytale where she'd meet her prince charming and ride away together in the sunset to live happily ever after.
In reality, she'd meet a broke university student and lose her virginity after a night filled with alcohol in an explosion of hormones.
"What are you thinking?", Lux asked her after she'd fallen silent for an unsual amount of time.
Caitlyn slowly brushed a couple of stray strands of hair away from her face and carefully tucked it behind her ear.
"It's not stupid", she reassured her with a serious voice. "What you want I mean.. It's not stupid. I understand".
Lux was visibly overcome with relief at her statement.
"I don't know what to do Cait.. And Ezreal.. he says he doesn't remember a thing either ecxcept for me kissing him. There's NO WAY I did that. I don't even know how I'm supposed to look him in the eye after.. all that.. We even got into a fight earlier..", she ran a hand through her golden locks. "Just.. I'm really glad you came. I appreciate that", she forced her lips into a small polite smile.
"Look.. Let's be smart about this whole thing", she gestured at the open air. "You both were pretty wasted last night and I know him half a life. I don't think he would ever take advantage of someone like that. If he says he doesn't remember, I believe him. Plus, I'm pretty sure it would take a truckload of Viagra for his johnson to actually work last night".
"His.. what?", Lux raised both eyebrows with a horrified expression on her face. It was quite obvious that she understood exactly what she meant but Cait decided to humor her.
"You know.. His willy". But Lux pretended not to understand once again. "The hot rod! The shlong! The babymaker!", she carried on mercilessly. "What do you call that back at your country anyway? Where are you from again"?
Lux remained expressionless with a dead look in her eyes.
"The penis Cait. That's what we call it. Please do me a favor and be normal about it".
Cait bursted out laughing at her reaction. She was slightly taken by surprise by her sudden sarcastic tone but that only made her like the girl a lot more than she already did.
Cait tried to wipe her teary eyes with the back of her hand even though she still hadn't managed to stop laughing.
"Oh come on Lux you can't tell me you haven't even thought about it!", she said still laughing. She hoped that joking arond would make the girl a lot less tense than she was. It seemed to work.
"Thought about what?", she folded her arms defensively.
"Oh please. You've been staying at his house for how long now? Two-three weeks? And you haven't even thought about making out? The guy is practically begging you! But hey I guess that's none of business", she smirked devilishly with a raised eyebrow hoping to evoke some sort of reaction from the girl.
"We're just friends Cait. And we've made that pretty clear from the beginning. Besides he's only trying to help me out".
At that moment it felt as if Luxanna's brain was lagging and her eyes froze there for a moment.
"Earth to Lux?", Cait waved her hand in front of her face in an effort to regain her attention but the girl's focus was somewhere behind her. The blue haired girl decided to turn around and see what had caught her friend's attention.
A few meters behind her stood a small, skinny girl with short, ginger hair. Caitlyn could have sworn she'd seen her before but right now she couldn't exacly tell where. She was holding a papercup in her tiny hands and her gaze was solely fixated on Lux. Cait was sitting there between them peeking glances at both of them as the atmoshpere grew heavier and heavier around them till the small girl suddenly broke down into tears. Her papercup had slipped from her delicate figers, leaving traces of what smelled like apple juice across the floor.
Intrigued she turned to see Lux was now standing. Her arm outstreched as if she was trying to reach the girl. Her lips were agape but no words came out as the ginger girl ran out the glass door of the cafe.
"Who was that?", she asked still not being able to recall the girl's identity.
"That's.. Zoe", the blonde whispered as she finally retook her seat.
"Oh!", the name jogged her memory. "That's the landlord's daughter right? The one with the crush on my dimwit of a friend", she rolled her eyes and stretched her legs underneath the table.
"Cait. I think I did kiss Ezreal last night".
"No!", she said dragging out that "o" for emphasis. "You didn't! In front of her..?", she covered her mouth with both of her palms. "That's like so cruel! We're already getting territorial, aren't we? You slimey son of a-"
"Look I don't remember all that much but she saw us in the hallway as we were about to get in the elevator. I don't recall exactly what she was saying to us but she was annoying.. and I had to find a way to make her go away", she admitted. The shame was undeniable both on the look in her face and in the sound of her voice.
"Woah", Cait blinked a couple of times. "I hate to break it to you but you know what they say: In vino veritas", she raised her mug in a toast and finished what was left of her coffee.
"Huh"?
"It's latin", she shrugged. "I'd roughly translate that to "quit lying you do kind of like him", that smirk was now permanently settled on her lips.
"I've already told you", she forced a fake smile on her face. "We're just friends. And I'm going to leave soon anyway. And I don't even see him that way! And why the hell am I explaining myself to you again?", she bumped her head on the table in frustration.
"I don't know what advice to give you but.. I can only speak from my experience anyway.. That's just my opinion in the end", she explained, "but all I'm saying is would it really be that bad if you tried this whole thing out with Ezreal"?
Luxanna's expression was easily decipherable: "Are you serious right now"?
"I've already explained how things are", she stated firmly. It was obvious that she was already at her boiling point. "Plus", she paused to let out a heavy sigh, "last time I trusted someone things didn't go that well to say the least", she explained.
Caitlyn lowered her gaze now as if she was reminiscing her own experiences and nodded apprehensively.
Luxanna was barely still in her pink, dreamy bubble. It genuinely broke her heart to see another one's dreams being shattered right in front of her. Her bubble would surely break someday but today was not that day. She would make sure of it.
"You know Lux.. ", she started off, "if there's one thing you should know about me is that I'm a pessimist. But even I don't think that every single guy out there is a dickhead. Just.. wait", she offered a comforting smile and Lux gave her back one of her own. "And hey.. what do you know.. he might be even nearer than you think", she gestured with her head to somewhere outside the cafe.
Lux turned her head to spot a familiar looking blonde guy in a black tracksuit walking on the sidewalk across the street. It was Ezreal. The blue haired girl knew that it wouldn't take him much longer to find them. He knew that this was Cait's favourite coffeeplace even if he himself had never set foot into the store before.
"Caitlyn. No.", she refuted her insinuations again.
"I ship it", she shrugged. Riling this girl up was simply enjoyable. Maybe she enjoyed it as much as she enjoyed tormenting her childhood friend.
"We're. Just. Friends!", she whispered frantically again. This was simply starting to wear her out as Cait broke into another round of uncontrollable laughter.
"FYI friends with benefits is thing", she gave her a sly wink.
"What's that?", Luxanna knitted her thin eyebrows together.
"Why don't you ask your friend?", she said with a lopsided grin. "I'm sure he'd love to teach you. Plus, I think he spotted us. So good luck with that", she picked up her coat and started to walk away from her when her steps finally came to a short stop before moving on. "Oh andlet me know what happened! I love me some gossip", she winked before she opened the door meeting her blonde roommate at the entrance.
Lux was simply sitting there with uneasiness filling her stomach as he came closer and closer towards her. For some reason she couldn't quite explain her heart felt like it would beat right out of her chest and her temperature was rising at alarming levels. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down and put on one of her fake smiles but she felt terrible for what had happened earlier.
She had actually hit him in the face. She didn't understand what had come over her at that point but the reality was that she had treated him like trash for no good reason..
And sometimes she really wished she could use her magic in this world. Cause if she could, she would surely make herself disappear right at that moment.