Author's note: Happy new year and thank you for your patience – I know it's been quite a while since my last chapter. I haven't had much time to work on writing this lately, but I should get this out for all of you to enjoy! Season 3 is over, but with its end comes the beginning of OreGairu Shin – a new and exciting era! The first part of Shin seems to overlap with this story and so this story begins to diverge from the canon established at the end of v14. Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy my interpretation of Hachiman's and Yukino's journey. As always, your feedback and support are much appreciated!
After our encounter on the bridge, the feeling of our surroundings had somewhat changed. We did our best to walk together in unison, but Yui inevitably drifted further and further behind us. Instinctively, we slowed our pace ever so slightly out of consideration for her.
On one hand, I was glad that she was willing to take a step towards making things less awkward for us. On the other hand…it all felt so troublesome. Our lives had become so much more beautiful and meaningful, but also more complicated. All I knew was that what Yukinoshita and I had was something worth working for.
I heard a nervous giggle from behind us. We'd have to make some sort of conversation now to smooth over the situation. Before I could speak up, though, soft words emanated from Yukinoshita's lips.
"Yuigahama-san…what are you and your family up to?"
The change of topic seemed to bring some ease to Yuigahama's attitude, and I felt a small weight being lifted off the situation.
"Eheh…we're planning to see Fuji-san tomorrow…"
"Ah…we just went there…"
Awkward once again. I spoke up as well this time.
"Yeah, the views are wonderful."
Yuigahama responded with a polite smile. She tentatively stepped forward and, for a moment, it seemed as though she would resume her traditional position in between the two of us. This time, however, she side-stepped at the last moment to end up to the left of Yukinoshita. The symbolism of such an action was certainly not lost on me; a quick glance from Yukinoshita seemed to only confirm that she felt the same.
Silently, we decided to return to the hotel. After a brief but tense walk, Gahamana awaited us in the lobby. Yuigahama forced a smile and she responded with a small but knowing nod as though it was not the first time that she had seen this face on her daughter. Before Yuigahama returned to her mother, she turned to us and gave a small wave. An awkward silence followed that was soon, as always, broken by Yuigahama's tentative voice:
"Thanks for listening to me and putting up with…all this."
What was it that we were putting up with, though? Everything had been settled best as it could, and Yuigahama would need to accept that. Time would tell whether she would hold to her new path. Yukinoshita and I gave Gahamama polite smiles; the knowing look with which she responded indicated that she understood the situation at hand.
Upon returning to our hotel room, I flopped down on my side of the bed. My partner came and sat down next to me as the room echoed with sharp exhalations from both of us.
Yukinoshita was the first to speak.
"I wish it had gone more smoothly, but at least it is done."
I nodded in agreement. "Yeah. We did what we could do."
"I suppose we should try and make the best of the time that remains."
"True…it's not like there's anything else we can do now. We need to give her time."
I hoped that Yuigahama would take this time in peace and that the way that she viewed the two of us would change. We had yet to decide whether we would try and invite her back in the way that we had done last year before her birthday. Truly, only time and patience could tell whether she would return to that clubroom bathed in sunlight.
Without warning, Yukinoshita grabbed my hand and held it surely. The sudden sensation of warmth that I felt eased my mind. She slid right up to me until our shoulders and legs were touching, and she lowered my hand to a resting position on our legs. She looked me in the eye and gave me a confident smile.
"We'll figure it out…just as we figured this out."
"I mean…that took time."
"As do many worthwhile pursuits."
"Such as?"
My partner smirked. "Must I spell out an example?"
I blushed slightly. "I suppose I cannot deny being chased by a beautiful girl."
Now it was Yukinoshita's turn to blush, and profusely.
"That…that's the first time you've…"
She stuttered as she strengthened her grip on my hand.
I quickly averted my eyes to an arbitrary corner of the room. A white ceiling panel met the richly textured wall.
"It's true though."
I felt a sudden attack of warmth envelop me, accompanied by Yukinoshita's lustrous hair becoming draped over my arms. My nose could only smell a floral scent now. Instinctively, I moved my arms to pull her in even closer, which had the result of her soft, warm cheek gently making contact with mine.
"Mmm…"
This cat-like noise came straight into my ear, and it was surely the most pleasant sound that I had encountered in a long time.
Without so much as a thought, I turned my face and gently kissed her cheek. It's your turn now, I silently told Yukinoshita with my grinn. With no more than a few millimeters between our faces, I could nearly feel the warmth of her blushing cheeks. My partner responded with a quick kiss on the lips. The trance-like state I was in felt like something out of a cheesy Western movie, but with Yukinoshita it felt sweet and meaningful. There was no doubt that we belonged together in this moment.
We spent a long evening talking about our lives and families and marvelled at what had happened over the past year.
"Do you remember the first day we met?" Yukinoshita teased.
"What kind of question is that? I was terrified of you. But…"
"Mmm?"
"I…was taken by your…appearance. I thought that I was going to become a romantic comedy protagonist in that moment."
Yukinoshita's cheeks turned a sweet shade of pink. "That long ago, huh…"
"Well, the feelings took a little longer to set in. But I always felt comfortable around you, in the way that we could talk so honestly. In the clubroom, at the mall, at the summer camp…"
"Looking up at the stars together, if even for just a moment…" Yukinoshita smiled.
"I wonder how Rumi is doing."
My partner nodded. "If you've made it this far, I have the sense that she will too. Things were already improving for her at the Christmas event, in no small part thanks to you."
Yukinoshita's rare admission of credit caused me to blush.
"I suppose that she needed a little nudge and help to become better-adjusted…just like us, I guess. We have Hiratsuka-sensei to thank for that."
As I said this, I thought back to her. She had dragged me – and us – through a lot. The Service Club, the summer camp, even ramen in Kyoto. But on a second thought, perhaps dragged wasn't quite the right word. At the time, I did feel like I was being taken against my will when all I wanted to do was be alone. But, undeniably, I could say that I was a better person today for these experiences.
Without the Service Club, I would have probably continued on my path alone and stayed mostly the same as I was in the preceding year. Sure, I could've made do with what I had. But looking at my partner beside me…I realized how much I had to gain by taking a couple of bold steps. Without the summer camp, I wouldn't have been put in a position where I needed to actively help others – something that, now, I couldn't seem to stop doing. It sure was a lot of work, but I suppose Sensei was right when she said that it would help Yukinoshita and I function better around other people. Now, we could at least tolerate them.
That was another change that Sensei had helped enact: We. A year ago, I wouldn't have been able to imagine myself ever being able to refer to more than one person when thinking of an aspect of my personality. By way of Sensei, Yukinoshita had changed that.
My thoughts were interrupted by my partner gently leaning on me as if to get my attention.
"What's on your mind?"
"That is a whole other conversation."
Yukinoshita smiled. "I'm here and listening."
After our tiring yet satisfying day, it was time to hit the sack. On the low, comfortable bed, I had my calmest sleep in a long time alongside my partner. The next morning, we rose naturally and early to the sight of sunlight streaming in through the window.
Our next adventure would be on the famous Lake Ashi, from which we would be able to get another perspective of Fuji-san. After a filling breakfast, we embarked on a longer walk up to the nearest station on the small railway line that would take us to the lake.
We made sure to allow plenty of time, anticipating our limited stamina. Indeed, Yukinoshita was soon breathing heavily with the uphill climb, to the point where I had to check in on her.
"We're almost at the train, it's not much further."
"Yes…I can make it. It's ok."
Yukinoshita stepped closer to me, and her hand brushed against mine. Instinctively, I took her hand and held it tightly. Glancing over at her, she nodded softly and began to breathe more softly.
We arrived at the train just ahead of its departure. Before long, we were on our way in a cabin that rattled and rumbled up and along the mountains lining the valley. I noticed a familiar look on Yukinoshita's face, one that distinctly reminded me of a certain monorail ride that we had taken not long ago [1], as well as of a memorable visit to Destinyland [2]. This time, however, she seemed much more at ease. Right away, she drew closer to me until our arms were touching. We glanced at each other; she was giving me a shy smile. We then turned our eyes to look out the window at the impressive scenery. The train passed through a switchback in which it reversed direction with a jolt, in order to make its way up a steep mountainside.
Although the situation was quite pleasant, I wanted to make sure that Yukinoshita's mind was not fixated on the rattling cabin and the increasing heights. I searched my mind vigorously to identify a suitable topic before, in all of my wisdom, I settled on something surprisingly generic.
"Hey, Yukinoshita…"
"Yeah?" She spoke softly as she turned her head to look at me.
"Uhh…what are some things that you like?"
I quickly averted my eyes at the thought of such a silly question. However, my partner smiled and drew closer to me. I jolted in nervousness as our legs gently touched.
"I can definitely say that one of the things I like is right in front of me."
Expected! But also cute! My eyes searched the train cabin for a way to respond that wasn't self-serving while also not making me look foolish. At last, I sheepishly responded.
"Ah, yes. You like beautiful views of the mountains, don't you?"
Yukinoshita playfully reached for me and tapped me on the scholar.
"Was that your attempt to be romantic?"
"Hm?" I feigned ignorance as my partner sighed.
"It worked I suppose." Yukinoshita winked.
I couldn't help but smile. "So, what other things do you like? Cats, Pan-san, reading…" I mentally went down the list much as I had when covering her disliked things earlier.
"You sure got that right."
"What else?"
"You missed tea."
"Ah, of course. How could I forget?"
Yukinoshita gave a mocking pout before continuing.
"Besides that, I like honesty in others."
"I can imagine. Others around you must have not acted in honest ways in the past."
"That's true. I didn't know how to handle it well until recently though...You helped with that."
I didn't really imagine that someone could be searching for the same thing that I was looking for and yet, here we were. What a life.
After a second train ride, we found ourselves boarding an impressive aerial gondola that would convey us across the mountains to our final destination. Yukinoshita stepped forward into the gondola station's lobby with some trepidation. This would certainly be more intense than the Chiba Urban Monorail or the Destinyland ride for her.
Shortly after we settled into the gondola, the cabin doors closed and the gondola shuddered as it rose towards the mountainside beyond the station. The sounds of the station rapidly faded away to be replaced with a deep thrumming noise as the gondola picked up speed and began to ascend the mountain.
Scarcely seconds passed before I felt Yukinoshita's warmth reach my arms and torso as she gripped on to me with a slightly nervous look in her eyes. By this point, I knew full well how to comfort her – but there was only so much small talk that this mind of mine could produce.
All I was able to offer at that moment was a few words of comfort.
"It's ok, I'm here and I hope that helps a little bit. I'm not good at small talk…"
Yukinoshita responded by nestling her head on my chest.
"It's ok…I feel safe like this."
For the next indeterminate period of time, I felt warmth and comfort as I enjoyed the wonderful views while my partner's breathing calmed down and her hair brushed against my jacket and sleeve.
Every day truly was becoming harder and harder to believe. In all honesty, it was a dreamworld that somehow was also my reality. The ephemeral scene outside the window only added to this sensation.
Slowly, as we began our descent down the slope of the mountain, Lake Ashi came into view. Before long, we would be greeted by a new view of Fuji-san, and the prospect of a pleasant ferry ride came to mind. Yukinoshita's breathing continued to ease as we drew ever closer to the ground.
Upon arriving at the terminus station of the gondola, my partner looked a little tired but otherwise in good spirits. According to my research ahead of time, we were a little ways from the ferry that would give us the best view of the scenery. Outside the terminus station, we hailed a taxi.
Searching for the words to describe the ferry, I fumbled with my phone before settling on an answer that I could give to the driver.
"Ah…could you take us to Moto Hakone? The ferry goes from there, right?"
Mercifully, the driver was patient and nodded his head in understanding.
A short but spectacular taxi ride took us past small clusters of houses on one side and the impressive lake on the other. I eagerly tapped my feet in anticipation of the ferry ride, holding a hope that there would still be seats available for a sailing.
The taxi dropped us off right next to the pier, where we spied a small structure with ticket machines and a cafeteria area. A tour bus lay next to the building, perhaps awaiting the return of passengers from the ferry.
As we got out of the study, I grabbed my partner's hand softly. Even now, the movement made her flinch ever so slightly. We were still getting more comfortable with physical contact, after all. Looking back, I saw Yukinoshita smile at me. We walked gingerly to the ticket machine. As I purchased two tickets for a cruise tour around the lake that would offer spectacular views, she clung on to me with unusual anticipation.
"You seem especially excited…even more than when we were going to the mountain itself."
"I haven't been on a boat in my recent memory, so I guess it's something new."
When I thought about it, I realized that it was indeed rather rare for people our age to ride boats. In our area, ferries weren't really a critical mode of transportation, and it wasn't common for people to have parties or events on boats. The thought of getting to try a novel experience with my partner was certainly an exciting one, even though so many of the things that we had already done over the past year were new to us.
We sat in the ferry terminal, gently tapping our feet as we watched the ferry gradually made its way across the lake to us. Before long, it gently made contact with the pier. By that point, we were already standing up, ready to try and grab a good seat.
As soon as the doors opened, it was my partner's turn to take me by the hand and lead me onto the ferry. She led me towards one of the first rows of red felt seats, which were surrounded by panoramic windows offering a majestic view of the lake and surrounding mountains. A few clouds began to roll in, but I trusted that they wouldn't obscure our view of Fuji-san.
As we glided north across the lake, a Shinto gate framed the foreground of a mountainous view over which Fuji-san majestically stood, its peak virtually bare of snow. I pulled out my camera to take a picture of the scene.
After I snapped a couple of shots, I felt Yukinoshita tugging at my sleeve. It only took me a moment to realize that she wanted us to take a selfie together. Quickly, I flipped the camera around and flipped up the screen so that we could line up the shot. Even on the small screen, I was impressed by the improved resolution of the image relative to what our phones could achieve.
Seemingly reading my mind, Yukinoshita chimed in with her thoughts.
"Perfect. Now I'll be able to see every inch of your dead fish eyes."
"Ah…that's not comforting at all, you know…"
Yukinoshita softly giggled in response. She could be so devious and so cute in the same breath.
After nearly an hour of us craning our necks and taking in the impressive scenery, we returned to shore feeling inspired and refreshed. It being lunchtime, we sought out a place to grab a bite to eat. Almost immediately, an intriguing Italian restaurant appeared in front of us, just down the street from the dock. Yukinoshita and I had had an interesting history with Italian food, having had it with her parents at her house and then at a fancy restaurant in downtown Chiba. This time, however, we were determined to enjoy it away from the presence of Hahanon and Haruno-san.
We settled in for some delicious and filling calzones to mark a half-day well-spent.
In the back of my mind, the events of the day before still sat slightly uneasy.
"I hope Yuigahama-san is doing better now." Yukinoshita seemed to read my mind as she glanced up in the general direction of Fuji-san.
"Yeah. Yesterday was a bit rough, it's definitely a difficult situation."
"There's only so much we have to do, though. Our responsibility to her is as a friend – we shouldn't let her get in the way."
It was a harsh thing to say, from certain perspectives – but it needed to be said, and I was glad that Yukinoshita had spoken up when we would once have left such words unspoken between us. I softly nodded.
"What do you plan to do if she doesn't give up?" I chanced the question.
In response, Yukinoshita reached across the table and softly took my hand. "You're more important." Her confident smile only served to reassure me of this statement. I felt a warmth rise in my heart and, perhaps, a weight lifted off my shoulders. Even if the implications of such a declaration ran deeper than we knew at the moment, it was a comfort to me.
After lunch, we strolled about the town for a bit. It had many interesting, winding streets and, in one corner, a hill atop which stood a sizable building with a pleasant balcony overlooking the waters below. We turned our attention to this building, walking along the seaside to reach the base of the hill upon which it stood. Here, we found a series of covered escalators. Nodding towards them, Yukinoshita signalled that we should check the place out.
I had to thank whoever had the brilliant idea of building these outdoor escalators, because we surely wouldn't have been able to survive the full walk up. The designers of this setup clearly were in tune with the sensibilities of youth such as me.
Atop the hill, the building revealed itself to be a museum of the Meiji era art movement known as nihongo. We walked around the gallery, taking in decidedly Western-styled paintings of Japanese landscapes and buildings.
Soon, Yukinoshita became fixated on one painting. Even before looking at the painting's contents, I already had a pretty good idea of what she was looking at. Sure enough, upon closer inspection of the bucolic scene in the artwork, I noticed a kitten nestled in the grass. Yukinoshita was learning forward, her hands on her knees, as if to welcome and comfort the kitten in front of her.
This girl's pesky, frisky love of cats was something that I found highly endearing. It only reminded me of the fact that I needed to invite Yukinoshita over to my house at some point (ideally, without Komachi or my parents around) so that she could spend time with Kamakura. However, inviting her for something like that would be highly stressful for me so I needed to give it time.
While I was lost in thought, I just barely made out a faint meowing from next to me. Seriously? In public? In an art gallery? What a girl.
After my partner had her fun with the painted felines, we walked around the gallery before coming across a set of large windows. These afforded us a view of the lake below and the impressive Fuji-san far beyond.
"That was better than I expected, really…" Yukinoshita breathed out slightly.
"That's good to hear. You like these kinds of museums, right?"
Yukinoshita softly nodded. "I do like looking at art."
Ah, an opportunity for a conversation.
"What do you like most about it?"
Yukinoshita stood pensively for a moment. Her figure was faintly reflected in the picture windows in front of us.
"Looking at art helps me take a moment for myself and contemplate things that are beyond my current situation."
"So…they open your mind in a way?"
"Yes, you could say that. I'm impressed that you take an interest in such things." At this, Yukinoshita gently smirked in a teasing manner.
"Hey, I'm more cultured than you think I am."
Yukinoshita put on a mock doubting face before flashing a brimming smile. Before she could respond, I took my chance to follow up my last statement.
"There's more to art than cats, you know."
Deservedly, I got a slight punch and a pout. Wait, the pout was super cute though, I probably didn't deserve that part…
After riding down the escalators back to the town, we found ourselves physically tired but mentally content with the day's adventures. As we walked around the streets one last time before hailing a taxi to take us to the station, I found my hand subconsciously slipping into hers as we walked closer than we were before. Holding her hand was a soft and comfortable feeling that brought a smile to my face.
After taking in the sights and scents of Motohakone, I pulled out my phone to call us a taxi to take us back to the gondola station. Before long, we were once again seated in the cabin of the gondola.
As we settled into our seats, my partner rested her head on my shoulder and gently closed her eyes. I tilted my head towards her, and we spent much of the ride contently sitting and slowly swaying back and forth with the cabin.
Undoubtedly, some force had captured us and turned our lives into a sort of living dream.
References:
[1] Oregairu Shin Volume 1, Chapter 3 features Hachiman and Yukino taking a ride on a suspended monorail, with the latter feeling a little nervous about the heights.
[2] Oregairu Volume 9 (and Season 2 Episode 9) features Hachiman and Yukino riding a water flume ride at Destinyland, during which the latter is also nervous about the heights involved.