Have a happy and safe holiday, everyone!
NCIS
Monday morning came with dread for McGee knowing he'd be seeing Gibbs again. He could avoid going to Abby's lab, but there was no getting around working with Gibbs. Even with Gibbs telling him not to blame Abby, she was just as much to blame for keeping secrets as Gibbs. He tried delaying going to work as long as he could without being late, and the tension was clear as he drifted passed Tony and Ziva's desks. He almost wished Gibbs had been sitting at his desk just to get the discomfort of the first look over with. Tony noticed McGee's slightly hunched shoulders and somewhat aloof walk.
"Rise and shine, McGee," Tony called as he checked his watch. "Don't worry, the boss-man didn't notice you coming in late."
McGee replied in a quiet, deadpan voice, "I'm not late. I'm on-time."
Tony exchanged skeptical looks with Ziva, then looked back to McGee. "You alright there?"
"Terrific," McGee mumbled, not even fully aware of the other agents' presence or furtive glances as he scanned through his work emails and got set up for the day.
Ziva shrugged and returned to her computer. Tony studied McGee curiously, but decided it was too early to investigate. After few minutes, Gibbs returned to the bullpen with a fresh cup of coffee. McGee heard him coming and locked eyes with Gibbs as he approached. The older man's cold blue eyes no longer set McGee on edge waiting for orders. Instead, he felt resentment and mistrust bubbling inside him as he wondered what Gibbs would be hiding from him today. His instincts moved him to avoid Gibbs' gaze, and only steal a quick glance at him when McGee thought he wouldn't be looking. Gibbs silently gritted his teeth as he sat down and felt the air thicken with tension.
Gibbs' presence reminded McGee of his thoughts from the previous night about leaving the team. In his anger towards Gibbs, he thought it would be satisfying to leave NCIS completely and let that weigh on Gibbs' conscience for manipulating him, but he remembered Riley's regret of leaving NCIS when he felt lost and aimless. McGee didn't think he felt lost, but just that he couldn't stay where he wasn't appreciated or told the truth. After a night's rest and a fresh take on the issue, he decided he'd be better off staying within NCIS but transferring to a different unit, possibly even a different area.
While the other agents performed their morning tasks, McGee started browsing around the various job postings within NCIS and the different branches available. There were some openings for a Senior Agent in Cyber Crimes, but he didn't want to let his momentum as a Field Agent go to waste. A division in Los Angeles called the OSP (Office of Special Projects) intrigued him. They had more advanced technical requirements than Gibbs' MCRT which would challenge and further develop his technical skills while still maintaining a Field Agent status. It would require moving clear across the country, which meant that he and Riley definitely wouldn't be getting back together.
McGee hadn't even considered what he'd do to get Riley back. It felt good yelling at Gibbs the previous night, and even better throwing him out of the apartment. He was still resentful of Gibbs and didn't know if that constituted actually being over him. But on the other hand, he felt a great deal more closure knowing that he didn't make up the things that had happened, and that it never would've worked with Gibbs. It may not have been everything he needed to convince Riley, but it was a good start after just one night. He decided that OSP would at least be a worst-case-scenario in the event that the rest of his life decided to collapse as well, but he started considering a transfer to Cyber Crimes or Cryptology if things on the team didn't improve.
He started printing out a Transfer Form, though the program briefly froze before actually printing. While it was printing out, Tony discreetly stood up and exited the bullpen as he normally did around that time for a bathroom break. Tim quickly hid the form in a manila folder as Tony passed, then discreetly started filling it out. He touched the pen to where he'd put in his signature, but he hesitated. He looked up at Ziva, who sat at her desk with the usual level of interest in her work that she could muster on a Monday morning. McGee couldn't blame her for what had happened since she only just met Riley and couldn't have known about his past. She and Tony did, on the other hand, sneak around trying to get a handle on him and Riley for their own entertainment. However, McGee figured that the pranks he and Riley played on them were enough to call it even. He was curious if Tony knew what had happened. Tony knew Riley was gay, but McGee wasn't sure if he knew about Riley and Gibbs being together all that time, or if he'd guessed about McGee's feelings for Gibbs. If he knew, he was just as spiteful as Gibbs or Abby for not telling him, but McGee wasn't going to assume.
McGee's computer chimed with an update from one of his programs, which snapped him out of his reverie. After reading it, he knew he'd have to speak to Gibbs, but he was just happy to have something else at work to focus on. He stuck the folder into one of this desk drawers and spoke up.
"Boss, I just got an update from our Pax River drug case. One of their dog handlers didn't show up for work," he tapped a few keys and brought up a file on the TV, "Petty Officer Kyle Hanson, he hasn't reported for two days."
"Grab your gear," Gibbs ordered. "McGee, with me. David, wait for DiNozzo and grab a second car."
McGee's hope for a work-focused day vaporized upon hearing he'd be alone in the car with Gibbs. Nonetheless, he quickly printed a warrant and took down the address, then strode with Gibbs to the elevator. Ziva smiled evilly knowing Tony's lateness meant she would get to drive. Tony came sprinting back from the bathroom and saw Ziva standing with her gear bag.
"Did I miss it?" he called.
"Just came in," she replied.
He dove down to his desk to grab his coat and bag, but his attention was drawn to McGee's printer loudly printing out another document behind his desk. "Dammit, Probie, don't leave without the warrant!"
He quickly swiped up the page, though when it didn't resemble the expected warrant, he read the heading again. It was another copy of an NCIS Transfer Form, mistakenly printed by the error in the program. Tony's expression dropped and his eyes went wide with shock and worry as he looked at the form, then at McGee's empty desk.
"Tony!" Ziva called.
Tony remembered the task at hand, crumpled up the form, and threw it in the trash can on the way out.
Once in the car, Gibbs asked for the address but said nothing more as they sped away from the Naval Yard. McGee tried to keep his focus on work as they drove, hoping that Gibbs wouldn't say anything at all. Gibbs got the hint, even without it being clearly written in McGee's body language. McGee felt the tension rise while the temperature seemed to fall inside the car, but it wasn't long until they screeched to a halt in front of the Petty Officer's house with Tony and Ziva right behind them. McGee bolted out of the car and started heading down the side before Gibbs could even tell him to go around back, more than anything just to have a moment alone to re-center his focus on the job before apprehending their suspect. He found the rear sliding door open though blocked by curtains.
"In position, Boss," he whispered into his earpiece. "Back door's open."
He heard Gibbs' pounding on the door, then a crashing inside. He braced himself as he thought he saw movement, then saw a blur as a German Shepard came shooting out of the house and sank its teeth into McGee's neck. The force of the 70lb dog colliding with him knocked him on his back and took his gun out of his hand, but also unlatched the dog's fangs from his neck. He instinctively jammed his arm up to protect himself from the attacking dog, but the dog kept after him and began biting and ripping at his arm. He had to roll to reach for his gun, and once he felt it in his grip he didn't even look where he shot. The bang echoed in his ears but sent the dog whimpering back and to the ground as a small amount of blood splattered over both of them.
McGee panted and grunted painfully as his left forearm and the right side of his neck throbbed from the mauling. He felt dizzy as he tried to stand up, but Ziva rushed out of the house to him. She paused when she saw the dog laying down on the ground with the bloodied gunshot wound in its chest, and her eyes widened when she saw McGee's injuries. Tony and Gibbs weren't far behind, each having similar reactions to the scene. McGee felt lightheaded and shakily holstered his gun with his right arm, then stumbled forwards into Ziva.
"McGee!" she yelped and quickly ducked under his shoulder to support him.
Gibbs moved forward and put a hand under his other shoulder, careful not to touch his forearm. "Sit him down," he ordered to Tony and pointed to a patio chair.
McGee felt uncomfortable as it was and shuddered at the unwanted physical contact with his teammates, especially Gibbs. He tried nudging away even as he was seated in the chair, but his brain was mostly in an irritated fog from the pain, wanting to be by himself to deal with it. He saw the concerned looks from Gibbs out of the corner of his eye and avoided them by staring at the wall, trying to block out thoughts of the pain. Ziva bent down to keep a close watch on the injured dog while Gibbs called for Ducky.
Tony took advantage of Gibbs' temporary absence and crouched in front of McGee with a snide smile. "First your right arm, now your left. Maybe Riley should get you an Explosive Ordinance Disposal suit for your next birthday."
McGee huffed angrily and was in too much pain to restrain his mouth. "Oh, fuck off, Tony!"
Both Tony and Ziva were both taken aback, and their eyes went wide with shock. Tony even physically stepped back as if struck across the face.
"Woah!" he howled, though instead of offense his voice carried glee. "There's a lady present, McLanguage! Yikes!"
McGee realized there's no way Tony could've known about the break-up, but bringing up Riley in a joking manner hit a sore spot that pushed McGee past his limits. Even though it did nothing for his physical pain, it did feel good to lash out at someone. The others went back to photographing the scene, which included Petty Officer Hanson's dead body, a package of cocaine, and a stack of cash. McGee was just starting to get used to the stinging and throbbing of the bites when Ducky and Jimmy arrived with painkillers. While he wanted to be by himself, he was relieved to have Ducky tending his injuries.
Ducky stood up after cleaning and bandaging McGee. "Well, a trip to the infirmary is in order."
Tony stepped forward and stood next to McGee. "You know Boss, I should get McGee home to change out of his bloodied and ripped clothes. That and…" he paused to think of a plausible excuse, "well he should also get a soda or something to bring his blood sugar up."
Gibbs eyed him suspiciously, then nodded. "Hurry back, we have a scene to process. Ziva, keep working. Ducky, when you're done with Hanson bring the dog back to Abby. He's covered in evidence. We'll meet you there."
McGee wasn't sure what Tony was up to, especially after cursing him out like that, but he was glad for the break from work while his neck and arm still throbbed. He stood slowly to avoid making his head spin, and when he stabilized himself he followed Tony to the car.
"It's okay, Tony. We don't have to go all the way to my place, I've got spares in my bag," McGee mumbled as he slid into the front seat.
Tony scoffed, "So do I. But you don't have a breakfast burrito in there too, do you?"
McGee's mouth lifted into a small smile as he thought, 'Of course Tony's thinking about his stomach.' He didn't notice it was the first smile he'd had that day.
NCIS
They drove to a small roadside shack that served a take-out breakfast that Tony swore by. McGee was pleasantly surprised when he got to sit down at a table while Tony stood in line instead, so he had a few minutes to wonder what Tony's motive was for these acts of charity. With a break from work and the painkillers setting in, McGee wasn't feeling as hostile as he did earlier but was still preoccupied with his injuries.
Tony dropped down on the other side of the table from McGee and presented him with a burrito of his own and a drink. "Drink up."
McGee sipped through the straw and was again pleasantly surprised. "Coke?"
"Told you, you need to get some sugar in you to counter the shock to your system," Tony stated matter-of-factly.
McGee's tension loosened as he started into his burrito, but he was still on alert. Tony moaned gratefully as he enjoyed his breakfast and tried not to look like he was waiting for something. He only managed to get half-way through the quick meal before finally breaking the silence.
"So, you wanna talk about it?"
McGee shrugged. "Feeling a little better. I shouldn't have yelled at you. It won't happen again."
Tony chuckled. "Actually, I thought that was hilarious. I've never heard you drop the F-bomb before. It was like watching Fraulein Maria swear in front of the von Trapp children."
McGee managed another small smile. "You're not trying to prank me again, are you? Because I'm really not in the mood."
"No, no," Tony assured him. "That'd be kicking you while you're down. I'm more in the 'worried' zone right now."
"Ducky didn't seem concerned," McGee offered and held up his wrapped hand. "And I still have feeling in my fingers, so it really could've been worse."
"Not what I mean," Tony replied quietly, then stared him directly in the eyes. "Why are you printing out transfer forms?"
McGee's half-smile dropped. He set down his burrito and leaned his head into his right hand. "You did NOT go into my desk. That's just what I needed."
"Didn't have to," Tony grumbled. "Heard your printer going and thought you left behind the warrant again. Turned out to be a transfer form. So… what's up?"
"Tony," McGee sighed in frustration, "I've had more than my share of rough conversations in the past couple of days. I'd rather not be forced into another."
Tony's worried expression grew. "Okay. Well… I just want to know if it's something I did, if I went too far, or if there's anything I can do to change your mind?"
McGee looked him over and could tell he was sincere. He wasn't sure where to begin, or how much he should say. He finally decided he had enough of trying to keep secrets. "Did you know I had a thing for Gibbs before Riley showed up?"
Tony looked truly dumbstruck. "You—G—Wait, you what?"
That was enough for McGee to know he was innocent. He could easily tell when Tony was faking disbelief, and knew he wasn't now. "Forget it, it doesn't really matter anymore anyway."
"No, I-I-I'd say it matters," Tony stammered. "But… Gibbs? Really? What about Riley?"
"Riley and I broke up," McGee admitted bitterly. "Just this weekend."
Tony sighed disappointedly. "Oh dammit, Tim, I'm sorry. I didn't know. But what does that have to do with transferring out? It's not like you work together. And well… I had no idea you had a thing for Gibbs, but it shouldn't make you transfer out."
McGee sighed and took another drink. "It's just… it's more complicated than that."
Tony's eyes widened alarmingly. "Erm… you didn't… you know?"
McGee shook his head tiredly, making Tony exhale with relief. He didn't get the sense that Tony was looking for dirt this time, but that he was actually concerned. In some ways he thought he'd miss both Tony and Ziva if he left, and those thoughts started to create doubt in his plan.
Tony tried not to dig further into the subject per McGee's request. After a full minute of uncomfortable silence only broken by the sound of chewing, he couldn't hold back. "Tim, I'm dying here. I can't just sit back knowing there's a problem, it goes against my investigative instincts. What happened that made this much of a mess that we as a team can't fix?"
"It's the team that's the problem," McGee blurted out. The stress from the last couple of days was bubbling up in him, but it wasn't anger that he was feeling. He was feeling sadness from the pain and was too exhausted to hold it back. Tears welled in his eyes as his mind relived each feeling, and he covered them with his hands. "I was manipulated by people I trust. I was pushed towards Riley so that my feelings for Gibbs wouldn't be a problem. I was lied to about things I held so close and it cost me the best thing that's ever happened to me."
Tony stared at McGee with his hands folded in front of him and pursed his lips. He took a deep breath. "Okay, I'm going to tell you something I have not told anyone. I nearly quit two months ago."
McGee lowered his hands from his face and looked curiously at Tony. It had felt good giving out the surprising news instead of receiving it like he had been for the last few days. But while Tony almost quitting was news, McGee felt too emotionally jaded to be shocked by it.
"You know the assignment I was on, the one to find La Grenouille?" Tony continued. "There was a girl involved, his daughter Jeanne. I had to get close to her, and…" he paused and clenched his fist, "I had to make it real to make it work. I let myself fall in love with her knowing full well I'd have to break her heart and my own when it was over."
"I remember," McGee mumbled. "You were upset for a while."
Tony nodded. "I had only intended to let it get so far, but… I guess you could say I was forced by those in charge to take it further. I guess I fooled myself into thinking it would never come to an end like that, that she would never have to learn who I really was. Afterwards, Jeanne left me a note asking me to choose between her and NCIS. What I never told anyone was that after I found that note, I went home and packed up half of the clothes in my apartment into suitcases. I couldn't imagine trusting people who would make me cross that line, to rip out part of me, to lie to the team who are the people closest to me, and to make me do all the things I did to an innocent person. So, I went into work the next day fully intent on turning in my badge and my gun as soon as I figured out where she was headed. But cases came up and I had to work with the team again, and it made me realize that despite everything I had done, the team still had my back. Over time we rebuilt that trust. But mine and Jeanne's relationship was based entirely on a false person, so leaving NCIS wouldn't fix it. Nothing would, not even honesty."
McGee was still as he listened. He still wasn't surprised by Tony almost leaving, but knowing how it felt, he was surprised that Tony stayed. Tony was right that in itself, leaving NCIS wouldn't fix the issues with Riley other than McGee no longer being around Gibbs constantly. It was something, but not enough. "It's not just about getting Riley back, though. It's about me too. How did you start trusting Gibbs again?"
Tony ground his teeth now having confirmation that Gibbs was at the root of McGee's problems. "It wasn't Gibbs, it was Shepard. She started treating me like a more senior agent, giving me opportunities and clout, but more importantly she wasn't personally involved in the cases anymore. She showed me that she could be trusted professionally, and she lived up to her promises. I guess if this all just happened, Gibbs hasn't exactly had time to do any of that yet, has he? And I'm guessing based on the fact you said 'people' that the other person is Abby, and she hasn't had time either."
McGee shook his head and replied sullenly, "I think Abby wanted to tell me, now that I think about it. She was bursting with a secret when I was first asking about Riley and now I know what it was. But I haven't talked with her, I only talked to Gibbs. He apologized to me."
"Woah," Tony replied in awe. "That's like… I've heard him put innocent admirals through the ringer with barely any a nod of acknowledgment. He must really mean it."
"Maybe," McGee mumbled. "That doesn't make it any easier or make it enough."
"What about when he saved your life at the warehouse raid?" Tony suggested. "That's gotta count for something, and it should at least earn him some time after all this."
McGee shrugged.
Tony continued, "Give it a few weeks, and if things don't even look like they're getting better then you'll know. But don't just up and leave, Tim. Please."
McGee looked into Tony's pleading eyes, and the sincerity was once again almost shocking. It almost brought a tear to McGee's eye but did produce a hint of a smile. Tony may have pranked him hundreds of times, but only now did it feel like the treatment from an older brother that was now there for him. He nodded affirmatively.
Tony sighed. "Good. Now, what about Riley? What's the deal there?"
"I don't know," McGee sighed. "I haven't talked with him since Saturday night. Things about Gibbs surfaced, and he said I needed more time to be over it. I didn't try to lie to him, I just didn't think it was an important detail, so I never told him. But apparently it was. I didn't know it at the time, but he was right, I did need more time to actually sort things out. I let Gibbs have it yesterday. I yelled at him hard about a lot of things that were on my mind. I really gave it to him. I just don't know if Riley will think it's enough."
"Does he know you're thinking of quitting?"
McGee shook his head. It wasn't his place to tell him about Riley and Gibbs, even if he was tired of secrets. But that thought triggered something in his head. He stared at the table as an idea started forming in his head. "Secrets," he whispered.
Tony leaned in. "What?"
"Tired of secrets," McGee continued quietly. "So what if it's not?"
"If what's not a secret?" Tony asked earnestly.
McGee started smiling genuinely as the idea blossomed. "Any of it. Everything between us… That's what I have to do. I'm going to write it."
Tony's eyes widened. "Write?! No, no, you're trying to win Riley back, remember? Writing a dopey caricature of him in your book won't inspire him to get you back on his good side."
"I'll write the real one," McGee answered confidently. "I'm going to write mine and Riley's story as real as I can, and I'm going to send him a copy before I publish it. He's tired of lies and secrets, so I'm going to make it true and public that I love him and want to be with him."
"Huh. You know, that's actually not a horrible idea," Tony smiled. "If you think it'll work, go get him, McGee."
McGee grinned and stood up. He felt good for what felt like the first time in years. Armed with the boldest plan he'd ever made he started walking to his car to go home, but when he looked around and realized it wasn't there.
Tony smirked and smacked the back of McGee's head on his way to the fleet sedan. "After the case, Probie."
NCIS
After having his wounds cleaned, medicated, and re-dressed by Ducky, McGee was happy to have restored full use of his left arm and hand with only a dull ache in any of the bites. He had spent a good portion of the afternoon watching security footage of a C-130 at the Pax River base, which meant that for the most part he wasn't working closely with Gibbs or Abby. He narrowly avoided having to fingerprint the entire C-130 with Tony and Ziva thanks to Gibbs needing him to cross-reference knife tips for a piece of evidence. He was sure that Abby could've done the same task, but had a feeling that Gibbs was trying to be extra-nice to him and get him out of a laborious crime scene while injured. During the car rides with Gibbs to and from the base, McGee occupied himself taking notes on his phone for what he wanted to write in his story. Gibbs made no attempt to mention their last conversation and resumed the normal-distance behaviors he had adopted over the last month.
After talking with Tony, McGee decided he needed to talk to Abby instead of avoiding her. He remembered that she wanted to tell him something but couldn't, so it wasn't her fault that she couldn't openly talk with him about Riley and Gibbs. He wanted to offer her a chance to be fully open and honest with him now that he knew everything, and to see what she thought of his plan. His only hesitation came from Ducky telling him how she fawned over the dog that mauled him, and from hearing that she was nearly barricaded in her lab until the dog needed medical attention. He decided to call her and have her come up to the bullpen, knowing that she'd leave the dog in the lab to recover.
"Timmy!" she called as she jogged over from the stairs. She came over and threw her arms around McGee as he sat. "There you are! I was worried when they said you were hurt, then I was furious because I heard you were the one that shot that poor dog, but then when you didn't come see me I was even more worried you were-"
"Abby, Abby!" He interrupted with a smile. "I'm okay, I just avoided the lab because I really didn't want the dog to think I was offering him lunch too."
She withdrew and gave him a look of shocked disgust. "He is a sweet, defenseless dog, McGee!"
His jaw dropped. "Defenseless?!" He pointed to the neck bandage and lifted his sleeve to show his arm. "That dog tried to rip me limb from limb and nearly succeeded."
Abby shut her eyes and took a deep breath to compose herself. "Fine, I will overlook your overreaction if you pitch in $10 for flowers for Jethro's recovery."
McGee blinked confusedly at the name. "Wait, what? Jethro?"
"Yeah, that's his name," she replied like it was perfectly natural. "He's strong, handsome, and quiet, so it seemed like the most fitting name as opposed to 'Butch.'" She sneered at the name as she spoke it.
McGee's eyes rolled as he reached for his wallet. "He certainly wasn't handsome or quiet when I met him…" He pulled out a $10 bill but held it back from her.
"What?" she asked.
"How about this: I'll give Jethro-" he spoke the name uneasily "- a clean slate and $10 for flowers if we can talk."
Abby smirked sarcastically and sat at the edge of the desk facing him. "Like we've ever needed to barter to talk before? What's up?"
He stared contemplatively at her, thinking of how to say it. Simplicity seemed best to him. "I know about Riley and Gibbs, I know you knew about my feelings for Gibbs, and I know that you got me in trouble with him to set me up with Riley after we first met."
The color drained from her face and her jaw slackened to bring her mouth open in shock. Her eyes were wide and she stood perfectly still. McGee had never seen her be completely speechless before, and he wasn't sure whether to wait for a sign of life or to keep talking after blindsiding her with a statement like that.
She stammered as she started to explain, "T-Tim, I'm- I'm- I-"
"Breathe," he instructed with a slight smile. As it was with Tony, McGee felt nice being on the other end of surprising news for once in a few days.
Abby breathed deeply and steadied herself with a hand latched onto McGee's shoulder. "Tim, please don't be mad. I'm sorry, I really couldn't tell you."
He nodded sympathetically. "I know you couldn't tell me about Gibbs and Riley being together. You even said it wasn't your secret to tell. But I just don't get why you didn't talk to me about everything else. You could've just asked me about what was going on with me and Gibbs."
Abby shook her head and shrugged. "I wanted to, but… it's Gibbs. He's like… you know how he is. He's like the bossy, silent, grumpy, but nice sort of- well… like…"
"Father-figure?" McGee completed, knowing how she felt.
"Yeah," she breathed. "It was just hard to think of you and him, and harder to think of even talking about it. It was weird enough when I figured out he and Riley were together, and then Riley just left. When I saw him again, it made me remember it all."
McGee squeezed her hand with his. "Why did you go through all the trouble of breaking Gibbs' computer? You could've just given Riley my number, couldn't you?"
She squeezed his hand back. "You'd been following Gibbs like a puppy for years. I honestly thought at one point I'd need to fit you with a shock collar to get you to move on."
McGee chuckled at the thought. "I doubt Riley would mind that right about now."
Abby raised an eyebrow and smiled. "Isn't that a little too kinky for you?"
"It's not kinky, it's complicated," he replied hesitantly. "We broke up."
Abby's jaw fully dropped in shock this time.
He raised a hand at her. "Before you say anything, I'm working on a way to fix it, but I need your help to make sure it's right."
She blinked confusedly and folded her arms again. "What happened?"
"I… I wasn't completely honest with him," he admitted disapprovingly. "I don't think I was really honest with myself either, and that made it worse. I told him I had feelings for someone when we met, but I didn't tell him it was Gibbs or that I had been in love with him. He found out in kinda the worst way possible."
She sharply breathed in. "Ah, yes, well I can't imagine him taking that well."
McGee gave her a cynical look. "Well obviously. He did dump me after all."
She slouched and shook her head at herself. "Yeah, I probably should've figured that one. It fits with the pattern."
"What do you mean?" McGee asked quizzically.
Abby stared at the desk reminiscently. "Riley is really brave when it comes to protecting other people, but he also tends to blame himself for problems with people. I'm pretty sure that's why he cut and ran when he couldn't make things work with Gibbs. On top of everything else he was feeling, he felt like he was in Gibbs' way."
McGee sighed understandingly as he put the pieces together. "That's why he had Gibbs come to me. He wanted to make sure the two of us could get together with him out of the way."
She cracked her knuckles and stared intently at him. "Which means he may be trying to run again. So, what's the plan?"
He leaned forward and lowered his voice. "All this started because of secrets that we were keeping. In my book, I re-wrote his character, Ryan Matthews, as a woman because of how it'd look for my publisher, and he knows that. But I'm going to change it back and write him as his true self, and my character is going to be with him publicly. I have to write McGregor's backstory as a romance with Amy because I don't want to risk anything pointing to Gibbs, but I'm going to write everything else as true as I can and publish it with McGregor and Matthews together. It may end my writing career and it would 'out' me for sure, but it'll be real and it'll be our story."
Abby breathed excitedly. "Nice, McGee! That's absolutely insane and so romantic! But… are you sure it's the right thing? Is that what he wants?"
"I'm not really sure," he sighed. "We haven't talked since the breakup. I wanted to call but he said I needed time to get over Gibbs. Gibbs and I… well we talked and I got a lot out of my system. He told me that Riley said he still loves me. I'm still not sure where we stand right now, but if he still loves me then that means we have a chance. I just need to talk to him before he cuts me off for good. But I'm worried that if I call him now, he still won't think it's enough time to be over it all. I just want to tell him that I'm trying to fix it and not just leaving him out there alone. Gibbs and I never could've worked out and I'm fine with that now. I'm still pissed off at Gibbs, and I don't know what to do about it right now, but I don't want to let Riley go just because of it."
Abby put her hand on his uninjured hand. "I'd give him a few days, but not much longer. Just enough time to calm down, but not enough to settle on a rash decision. Then, call him and tell him what you're doing with the story."
He looked up at her with uncertainty. He thought about telling her about his thoughts of transferring, but he didn't want to upset her if he wasn't really going to be going anywhere.
"And if he doesn't like it," she added with a sly smile, "then the story will always remind him of what a good catch he's missing."
McGee smiled genuinely once again, despite thinking that morning that he wouldn't smile for weeks. He stood up and hugged her tightly, and heard a small hum of relief from her. Pulling away, he held up the $10 bill for her to take, but she shook her head.
"Actually, I have a better idea," she replied with a smile. "I need a bit of a favor, and so does Jethro."
McGee still winced at her giving the furry beast that name but stood listening anyway.
She continued, "Gibbs talked to the base commander about letting me keep him, and he said yes, but my landlord said no."
"Hmm," McGee hummed and nodded, not seeing where this was going. "That's too bad."
"I have to find Jethro a good home," she urged. "And I'm leaving in a few days for a short trip, so I don't have a lot of time to find one."
"You're going somewhere?" he asked with surprise.
"Oh, yeah, just some high school thing, nothing big," she shrugged and waved it off, though her eyes briefly betrayed uncertainty. She quickly recomposed herself and stood up. "But, Jethro's a distinguished veteran, and…" she smiled enticingly and placed her hands squarely on McGee's shoulders," … He deserves to be happy, McGee."
McGee's eyes widened as he finally understood. "Abby, no. No, no, not a chance."
"You've been looking for a dog, Timmy," she reasoned.
He shook his head urgently. "That dog tasted my blood and I think he liked it."
"Come on, you said you'd give him a clean slate!" she pulled him towards the elevators. "I'm taking you down to the lab and when you see him, you'll understand that you and Jethro were meant to find each other and that he was meant to be your dog. Plus, I want to make sure you have company in case things with Riley don't work out."
McGee's jaw dropped. "Wow, thanks for the vote of confidence."
She pressed the elevator button with a grin. "Anytime."
NCIS
The very first thing Tim realized when he got home with Jethro was how drastically unprepared he was to bring a dog home that night. As Jethro was let off his leash to explore, Tim became aware that there were plenty of computer cables that suddenly seemed much more exposed than they used to, along with several items around his electronics workstation that could easily disappear into a German Shepherd's ever-hungry mouth. Jethro at the very least appeared to be housetrained in that he hadn't relieved himself in the 30 seconds he had been inside, but Tim was nevertheless keeping close tabs on the dog while compiling a list of everything he needed from the pet store.
Tim nervously filled a cereal bowl with some dog food and one of the pills Abby gave him, while the bandage and dull throb in his hand reminded him of the first meal of sorts he'd given Jethro. The dog had been completely calm since the shooting, and Tim hoped he'd stay that way even after both of their bandages came off. Jethro cheerfully trotted into the kitchen and immediately sat expectantly. Tim gave an impressed half smile, then cautiously lowered the bowl where Jethro dove his snout into the kibble. As Jethro was bent down, he noticed the brass plate that read "BUTCH" on Jethro's collar.
"You know, we're gonna have to find you a real name," Tim suggested while filling another bowl with water. "Yours has a… well, they both have complicated stories attached."
Jethro lapped up the water then looked around the kitchen. His black-and-chestnut coat flexed under the white bandage around his torso as his snout surfed the edge of the kitchen counter.
"What if we shortened it to just Jay?"
The dog seemed indifferent to anything Tim was saying.
"Jay," Tim called out.
The dog's ears perked up and he turned to look at Tim for a moment, then resumed searching the kitchen floor for crumbs. Tim raised an eyebrow and decided to test it further. He walked to the other side of the apartment, then called out the name again.
"Jay!"
He heard the clicking of nails on the floor as the dog peeked out of the kitchen at him. Tim squatted down to the floor, which the dog decided was friendly enough. Jay trotted happily over to him and was finally met with a smile from Tim. Tim ran his hands through Jay's fur and started feeling more at ease with the situation.
"Guess you're my Jay now, aren't you? You gonna be a good boy for me?"
Jay tilted his head to the side, not understanding but listening anyway.
"Alright Jay, we've got a mission. There's a guy out there I have to win back. I've got to churn out a book and I don't have a whole lot of time to do it."
Jay squeaked as he opened his mouth in a large yawn.
"Thanks. You're a big help. I'm also giving a dog a mission briefing, which says a lot about my sanity," he quipped sarcastically.
Tim moved to the bedroom to change out of his work clothes and was followed closely by his companion. Before Tim could stop him, Jay leapt up onto the bed and comfortably stretched himself across the center of the king-sized mattress. Tim could already see some fur had shed on his black sheets, and quickly added "dog bed" and "lint roller" to the pet store list.
With Jay resting quietly on the bed, Tim sat at his typewriter and began poring over pages he'd already written with Riley's female character, Rita. His first task was to re-write them with Ryan Matthews instead, which was simple enough. As much of a fight as Riley pretended to put up about being on the stripper pole, Tim was sure he'd get a kick out of his character actually being there as Riley had in real life. He decided to keep the fight scene in the story to pump up Matthews' character, and made sure to add in the kiss that changed Tim's life.
After writing the scene of McGregor and Matthews' first kiss, Tim's thoughts drifted to the many kisses he and Riley had shared, and even the vivid sexual dream he had about both Gibbs and Riley. He remembered that Riley had wings in that dream, and quickly made a change to Matthews' tattoo from dragon wings to angel wings. When he pictured Riley, Tim chuckled at the thought of Riley pretending to be an angel. He was a good guy for sure, though his mischievous streak made him far from angelic. Tim loved that about him.
His first thought when meeting Riley was that he might be too much, too intense and fiery to be interested in someone like Tim. His love for Gibbs kept him safe and away from the unknowns of other people before. It was easier to be alone, knowing exactly how things would be. He thought he had been happy to be alone, but after living for what seemed like a brief moment with Riley in his life, being alone felt like sheer hell. The roles had reversed almost overnight with Gibbs having held him down in darkness and safety, and Riley pulling him away to light and limitless possibilities.
Tim's breath caught in his chest as he wrote down the feelings into intelligible phrases, then proceeded writing page after page of conversation and story between McGregor, Matthews, and Amy Sutton. It was as real as he could make it while putting only himself in the public's line of fire. He hoped it would be enough for Riley to realize he meant everything he said, that he wanted only him. But even if it didn't make things right with Riley, Tim realized that he also wanted to do it for himself. The book he had written before was tacky and thin, with the only real substance being the characters themselves. He had been writing from the brain before, writing what seemed like a good plot for a mystery novel. He had been having trouble lately because this time he needed more than just characters, he needed real feeling. He now had something real to write about, and he wrote from his heart.
He typed until 3 AM when he finally couldn't keep his eyes open or his punctuation even close to correct. He drifted zombie-like over to the bed and passed out next to Jay, not even needing to turn off the lights.