Chapter 9
Zuko stretched, trying to settle more comfortably in his folding chair, casting another glace around his family estate on Ember Island. After lying abandoned for so many years, it had taken considerable money and effort to restore it back to its former glory, together with some additions. Such as the large pool in place of the demolished fountain, something that Katara was clearly grateful for, even if at the time Zuko had approved the change without knowing that Katara would ever return to Ember Island.
After arriving at the estate, Zuko had watched Katara disappear into one of the bedrooms only to emerge a short while later wearing her swimwear, a white two piece with a thin layer of extra fabric covering her hips. Zuko found the contrast between her dark coppery skin and the white swimsuit particularly enchanting as she dived right into the pool and then spent a good while swimming in circles and amusing herself with some light waterbending exercises. Currently, Katara was still in the pool, but instead of swimming she was lounging with her back on an inflatable mattress, smiling as she stared at the blue sky above, playfully letting the tips of her fingers dip into the water now and then.
As for the others, Zuko was aware of Mai's presence on the terrace just above the pool where his girlfriend sat nursing a drink and appearing brooding, or basically just being herself. At the far end of the pool, there was a large open air grill and Suki and Ty Lee were busy working on it, preparing the fresh fish and vegetables they had bought from the local fishermen at the Ember Island harbor.
All in all, it was shaping up to be an excellent day, and Zuko felt much more at peace here, away from his duties at the palace. Not that he did not enjoy being the Fire Lord... sure, the responsibilities were daunting at times, but there certainly were far more benefits than there were drawbacks. And Zuko knew that he would be lying if he tried to claim that deep down he didn't actually enjoy his responsibilities. Being the Fire Lord provided him with a way to continue restoring his own honor, through restoring the honor of his homeland and helping it heal. All in all, Zuko admitted, being a Fire Lord was very rewarding, especially if he could now and then still take small vacations such as this. The only way how this vacation could be improved now was if he could find himself a little closer to Katara, but with Mai watching them like a hawk from above, there was not much that Zuko could do about that situation.
I'm hoping that my would-be fiancée would go away so that I can talk more with this other girl, Zuko suddenly realized the absurdity of the situation. Yes, it doesn't take a genius to realize what's going on here. But how did it happen? And so quickly? He glanced at Katara again, marveling at the peaceful smile on her lips, a rare sight if there ever was one. I guess it's not really a surprise. Katara truly is one of a kind.
A sudden shadow fell on Zuko, interrupting his thoughts. Opening his eyes, the Fire Lord blinked, seeing Mai standing over him with a blank look on her face. "I'm going for a swim. On the beach," she informed him tonelessly. "I'll be gone for a while."
"But Mai, we're about to start grilling the fish!" Ty Lee called out from over at the other end of the pool.
"I'll have it cold, it'll be just as good," Mai shrugged at her.
"Do you want me to come with you?" Zuko forced himself to ask out of politeness.
"No, I'd rather not," Mai's reply surprised him. "I want to be alone," she added before nonchalantly walking off and disappearing down the rocky path leading away from the estate and down to the beach.
Zuko felt both surprised and alarmed at this turn of events. Mai had been very insistent the night before about keeping a constant eye on him and Katara, having accused him of harboring more than just feelings of friendship for the waterbender... something that by now Zuko himself couldn't in good conscience deny. And yet, now Mai was sneaking off at the first opportunity. Something wasn't adding up and having waited a bit more for Mai to put in some distance between herself and the estate, Zuko looked at his two bodyguards by the grill, pointing at Suki and then beckoning her over.
Suki was by his side at an instant. "Yes, Zuko?" she asked expectantly.
"I'm not sure what Mai is up to," he explained, earning a quick nod of understanding. No doubt, the two bright girls were just as perplexed by Mai's unexpected departure as he was. "Go and make sure there are no unpleasant surprises. And be discreet."
"Of course, Zuko," Suki saluted the Fire Lord, then promptly running off all business-like, stopping only to tell Ty Lee what needed to go onto the grill next, then giving her girlfriend a peck on the cheek and finally dashing off down the same path Mai had departed by.
Feeling a little more at ease now that Suki was on the job, Zuko was about to return to his musings, shooting a passing glance at Katara and noticing that she was looking over at Ty Lee. Zuko looked back at his charming bodyguard only to notice her giving Katara two thumbs up and a beaming smile of encouragement. The next thing Zuko became aware of was a loud splash as Katara had rolled off her inflatable mattress, plunging into the pool. She emerged at the side of the pool moments later, lifting herself up and standing there, her long dark hair mussed and dripping wet, rivulets of water running down her softly glowing coppery skin. Zuko felt his mouth become as dry as the Si Wong desert, and a sudden spike of arousal flared up in his gut. Suddenly, he was extremely grateful that his swimming trunks were rather baggy and served well to hide any embarrassment.
Undeterred, Katara used her waterbending to quickly rinse herself completely dry, leaving her locks flowing freely again. She walked up to where Zuko sat, perching on an empty folding chair next to him, giving Zuko a look of concern in her wide blue eyes. "What's going on?" she asked quietly. "Why is Suki following Mai?"
"I don't know," Zuko shrugged his shoulders. "But I want to be careful. I didn't expect Mai to be sneaking off like that."
"Just how is Mai tied up in all this business with her father, the former governor?" Katara prodded.
"I'm still trying to determine that," Zuko replied. "If there is an actual conspiracy, I hope she's not a part of it, but Mai is very hard to figure out. I'm sure that by now you have realized that we are together not so much because we have very strong feelings for one another. The idea is that through our marriage I can flip Mai's family from rivals into allies. On the other side, through our marriage, Ukano will get more access and influence at the court, just like he has always wanted."
"I'm sorry, but I still feel those are terrible reasons to marry someone!" Katara blurted out passionately.
"I could not agree more," Zuko sighed. "However..."
"It would bring peace and stability to the Fire Nation," Katara finished, her face falling considerably. "I understand. I just... wish you didn't have to do that at the expense of your own happiness, Zuko. You deserve to be happy after everything you've been through."
Zuko stiffened at Katara's words, fighting a sudden urge to simply pull her into his embrace and hold her for as long as he could. It took all of his willpower, but he eventually brushed these feelings aside. "Mai's not that bad, honestly. It's just her father and her uncle, the former warden of the Boiling Rock prison," he tried, but he was aware of sounding insincere. "I'm pretty sure I'm not going to be completely miserable with her," he tried to joke, but the attempt of levity fell on its face. Katara looked saddened and not at all amused.
"Things don't always work out the way we hope, do they?" she remarked with bitterness in her voice, making Zuko look at her with concern and surprise. Is she talking about herself and Aang? Or does she mean something else?
"What did you hope for, Katara?" he asked quietly. "After the war, I mean?"
She thought for a while, eventually letting out a heavy sigh. "I have one big regret that I haven't told anyone about. Especially Aang, because I know he would feel guilty about it," she began. Zuko waited patiently for Katara to gather her thoughts and continue. "I had hoped to go back to the South Pole after the war and help my people rebuild. But instead, Aang and I got together, and... well, I ended up following him wherever he was called to restore a broken world back to order. And the pleas for help kept coming in, one after another, everyone asking for the Avatar's help. We were dashing from one crisis to the next, dousing the flames in one place and then off to the next. In the middle of all that, there was I and what I thought was my selfish desire to help out my homeland above other places that perhaps needed help even more... and so I kept quiet and didn't voice my wishes, until only a year or so ago."
"You have always placed the needs of others over your own, Katara," Zuko smiled at her, gently stroking her hand. She did not withdraw it. "Perhaps you would be happier if you learned to be a little more selfish, Katara. But maybe then it wouldn't be you."
"It does seem to be a failing of mine," Katara admitted ruefully. "I often find myself trapped between either feeling guilty or feeling unhappy," she sighed. He squeezed her hand tighter and she blushed warmly, squeezing back. "Anyway, a little over a year ago, Sokka and I parted with Aang and went back to the South Pole, hoping to help our tribe rebuild. What I found there shocked me to the very core. In my absence, the South had already been rebuilt, and I had completely missed my chance to have any say in it."
"I'm sorry to hear, that must have been hard," Zuko said. "Did you not find the result to your liking? I know I personally assigned funds from the royal treasury to help the Southern Water Tribe."
"I... may have used those funds a little differently," Katara shrugged. "The rebuild was done with little concern for our cultural heritage. I mean, my village now looks like a smaller scale version of the Northern Water Tribe capital... because the rebuilding efforts were overseen by our Northern brethren. And the investments from the Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom went largely into this huge oil refinery just outside the city. When I saw what the place where I grew up looks like now, I was in a complete shock."
"Progress at such speed can feel very confusing, I suppose," Zuko admitted. "The Fire Nation has always been comfortable with technological advancement, but culturally... we are very stuck in our ways, and it's hard to change."
"Oh, it's not that I mind progress," Katara shook her head. "The life I knew growing up was full of hardship, especially... especially since the death of my mother. I appreciate every bit of comfort and luxury I can get, and if progress makes the lives of my compatriots a little easier, then I am all for it. But..."
"I knew there would be a 'but'," Zuko smiled at her.
"See, ever since I left the South Pole to go on this journey with Aang and Sokka, I have been carrying this memory of the South in my mind with me," Katara admitted quietly. "In a way, it was a link to my mother," she tugged absentmindedly on her necklace as she spoke. "My final link with her. When I returned to the South Pole, I had hoped to explore this link, and to slowly heal my wounds by helping and guiding my people through the process of rebuild..."
"But instead you found it already rebuilt," Zuko realized with a sinking feeling in his gut, his heart aching for her still fresh grief. He could not stop himself this time as he pulled Katara into his arms, and she did not resist, starting to sob against his chest. Zuko nervously glanced over at Ty Lee working the grill, noticing the girl giving him a beaming smile and the gesture of thumbs up. He decided to ignore her.
"I feel like my final link to my mother was severed before I even had the opportunity to heal properly," Katara whispered barely audibly. "And now there might never be a way for me to get a closure."
"Don't say that, Katara. It's not like you to ever give up hope," Zuko whispered back, holding her tighter. "I regret that I will never have the opportunity to meet your mother, but I know she must have been a remarkable woman. She would have been so proud of what you have achieved, Katara. Of what you have become," he added, feeling her tears hot against the skin of his chest.
They held each other for a long time, and would have continued to do so, if the voice of Ty Lee hadn't interrupted them, forcing the pair to separate with shy smiles. "Hey guys?" Ty Lee called out to them from the grill. "Uh, sorry about that, but... I think I burnt the fish."