Wishfull-star: thank you! Stay safe as well.

We got some angst in this chapter. Enjoy~

Marco was uneasy. Very uneasy. They'd learned that Blackbeard had killed a phoenix. He hadn't told Ace yet as he didn't want him to panic. How would a phoenix get killed? They were supposed to be invincible! Marco suddenly felt very vulnerable, a feeling he didn't remember ever feeling.

He, and his family, wanted the man captured at once. Why was he doing this? What was the reason? Going around and killing mythical creatures… he'd killed a dragon, which was insane enough, but now he'd killed something invincible, able to heal any injury immediately. Marco had never been almost killed. Could you die before healing? It was a scary thought.

Ace had passed out in the library, so Marco was letting him sleep on the couch in there. Spade had been outside, but following the rules and staying near the palace, flying in circles around it. You could see his shadow outside on the balcony from that.

The family was worried about Marco, too. And Spade, too, but Marco much more. And Marco was more worried about Ace than himself. Though nobody knew what Ace was, not even his step family. He should be safer than Marco, and that was a relief. Maybe Ace could fight back with his ice powers, though.

It had been five days since he came, and they really realized that his ice powers were dangerous when a bird was eating bird seed out of his gloved hands, and when it pecked a hole in them by accident, being a bird with a long and sharp beak, it's head froze and it died. Ace had cried over it. It had been heartbreaking.

Spade, however, had mastered control. He'd tried to cheer Ace up by making him an ice slide, but it only made him feel worse. He had zero control and Spade was already sculpting easily. Thatch and Izo did their best to cheer him up, but it didn't work. Ace was uneasy and shy, clearly afraid of getting caught.

Marco had been spending any time he could get away with Ace. He snuck into his room at night to sleep with him. Spade slept on a large dog bed in his medium size, or on the end of the bed in a much smaller size. It felt good to sleep with Ace. No matter if he got cold during the night and Marco had a blanket around him.

It was sad that he had to keep the gloves on even when he slept. But it was for the safety of others and objects. So he didn't hesitate to wear the gloves. Marco got used to sleeping curled around Ace, and it would be hard, going back to sleeping by himself. Seeing Vivi and Nami at night would make him sad.

But he had started to reluctantly feel a tiny sliver of hope. He knew it was useless to hope, but he just couldn't help it. Pops had privately told them that he wanted to be closer to Ace, doing it for Roger, wanting his child to be happy after he lived alone with terrible people for so long. Even though Ace was shy and closed off, Pops liked him.

He said he saw potential for him, and would welcome him if he ever wanted to work as a guard. After all, once he mastered the ice powers, he might be powerful. Marco wanted him to stay, but not as a worker. Though there wasn't really anything else he could be. He wasn't a prince, and even if Pops thought they were adopting him, he still wouldn't be a prince.

Ace wouldn't be in a "handmaiden" position or anything like Nami's position was at the moment, and had been for years. Besides, Ace would be even more worried about getting caught. They would have no alone time without clearly leaving the grounds together. And Ace would have much of his freedom ripped away by a position in the palace.

He wouldn't be allowed to leave whenever he wanted, fly off with Spade or by himself, or go on long rides with Chopper. He'd be shackled to his duties there. Marco had no doubt he wouldn't want that situation. So Marco tried to squash his hopes.

Because the hopes he really wanted to avoid came closer every time Pops said something positive about Ace. He really wanted Ace to open up to them, but Ace was showing no signs of doing so anytime soon. The hopes that Marco wanted to avoid were those of acceptance to his secret relationship. It would be complicated, perhaps, for Vivi and Marco to stay together once they were both found out. Ace and Nami would still be inside relationship positions. And when an heir had to be born, it might be difficult for Vivi and Marco to be parents when it was clear that they didn't love one another.

The child may get confused or even upset. But, if he or she grew up in that situation, maybe it wouldn't be so strange. Well, they had a long time until then. Pops wasn't pushing them anytime soon, which Marco was grateful for.

Marco was pacing outside the library door, but shouldn't have been surprised when Ace opened it and saw Marco. He would be able to smell and hear him easily. Spade was behind him, no doubt picking up the worry from Ace about why Marco was acting so nervous. "What's wrong?" Ace asked in worry. The prince hated Ace worrying over him, but there was no helping it based on how Marco was acting.

He said they should go inside, and closed the door behind them, heading to the couch Ace had been sleeping on when he had a narcoleptic attack. "Blackbeard struck again. He killed a phoenix," Marco said, getting straight to the point. Ace's eyes widened in horror.

"H-How?" he asked in shock and fear. Marco took his hand and said he wasn't sure how. Spade seemed suddenly very worried, and blocked the door, standing in front of it. Marco hoped he didn't start rejecting anybody being around Ace now, out of pure concern. He wouldn't be surprised, though. Based on how he acted around Ace, he'd be very uneasy from now on until Blackbeard was eventually caught.

"Nobody knows about me, right?"

"No, nobody knows. It would be best for you to hide it… again," Marco said, sounding ashamed. Ace had hidden it for almost his whole life. Now Marco was telling him to do it again. The younger wrapped himself in his arms, though not from the cold. He mumbled that he didn't want to hide it again. "I know. And I'm sorry for telling you this. I just don't want you targeted, baby."

Ace said he knew that Marco didn't want that either, but he still didn't want to hide it. "You're lucky. You can be yourself cause everybody already knows." Marco said he wasn't always lucky about it.

"Everyone always put me on a pedestal when I was little. More than a prince, like I was some god. I'm glad it didn't go to my head, but when there were other kids here to visit, I never knew if they actually liked me for me, my status or being a phoenix. It was sad. I know suppressing it and hiding it would have felt worse. Especially since you were unable to use them for so long after hiding them."

Ace nodded, saying he didn't want to lose them again. "I don't put you on a pedestal. I wanted to meet you cause you were a phoenix, but that's not the only reason I love you." Marco smiled and pushed a strand of hair out of his face. He knew that. He knew Ace loved him for him. And Marco wished he didn't need to hide it.

Then he sighed and said something that put a lance through Marco's heart. "I feel like I have to hide everything important to me. Being who and what I am, who I love, my own personality. Everything isn't mine anymore." Marco bit his lip, feeling so guilty. It was Marco making him hide these things. All for Marco's sake. He was the one that didn't want Ace to be a phoenix here. Shut that life down the moment he stepped inside the palace. Had to hide his relationship with Marco because he didn't want his family to know.

It was for Ace's sake, too, of course. But it was Marco's doing. Marco asked if he really hated it here. He had no other option he could think of. Even having Marco stay at his home, it would still be dangerous for both of them, now.

Ace started to cry, trying to hold it in. "Being here just makes me realize I can never fully be with you. I'm nothing like you guys. Nobody knows. I want people to know that I love you, but I can't. I just want to hold your hand or hug, and I can't even do that. You have to sneak to come see me without it being suspicious."

Marco hugged him, his own tears of guilt coming down his face. He worried that this would drive Ace away, until he spoke again, still crying into Marco's shoulder. "I just want to love you without being afraid."

"I'm so sorry, Ace. I didn't know it hurt you so much. You've told me you were okay with it," Marco said. And Ace had, multiple times. He said he wanted to enjoy things for now, no matter what happened.

"That was before I thought of you as my soulmate," he mumbled. "I know it's not good, to be clingy and annoying. Be a bother to everybody. I love you too much." There it was. The real sign of what Ace's home life had done to him. He felt unworthy of Marco's love, unworthy of any care by anybody.

"I just want to be beside you in life. And it makes me sad that that will never happen. You'll need to get rid of me someday, I'm just afraid of when that will happen, sooner or later," he whispered. Spade rubbed his head against Ace's leg, but he didn't seem to notice it. He was lost in his own misery.

Marco pulled him away and tipped his chin up. "You deserve all the love in the world. You don't love me too much, I promise. You aren't annoying or clingy. You've been patient, waiting for when it's a good time for me. It's not fair to you. I'm sorry, I want to give you all of me. I'm scared, too. Scared you'll give up on the stress I bring you. Scared my family will find out and reject you, hurting you beyond belief."

Ace looked down, and mumbled, "I don't want to come between you and your family. I don't want to ruin your reputation. I don't care if I'm not a prince, I don't care if the public doesn't know. I just… I don't know. I just want to be with you and not have to hide it from important people. I do understand why we have to do it like this, but it doesn't mean I like it," he finished, face red in shame.

He started to shiver, getting really cold. Marco wondered if it reacted to his emotions. Ace cursed and curled into a ball, trying to get warm. It was unfortunate that his own power made him cold. Once he could control it, hopefully things would get better. Marco took his hands in his, rubbing his thumb over his gloved knuckles. "I couldn't ask for anybody better, Ace. It's not right for it to be like this. But we can do it, even if it's not in front of my family. Nami and Vivi have done it for years."

Ace looked down and said, "But they're supposed to be around each other. Nami is her handmaiden. I'm not in any position where I can be with you much of the day." Marco knew that was true. In a way, Vivi was luckier than he was. Nami had grown up with her, had always been around her. They were together much of the day.

Marco's love didn't live with him. He had to go away to see him. Ace had to wait for him, he was never able to fly to Marco's home. Marco wished, for the first time in awhile, that he wasn't a prince. That he could live normally with Ace. Have his family not shun him. Have it be normal and not have to be a secret.

But, there was nothing he could do about that. The situation was what it was. Marco loved Ace deeply, but he could never disappear from his family. He loved them, too. But he refused to have to choose one over the other. He would have both, damnit, no matter how he accomplished that.

"If you could work here, would you?" Marco asked quietly.

Ace looked down. "I would be trapped. I want to be with you, but I also want to be free. I want to be able to fly places, go with Spade back to his home if he wants. Go on rides with Chopper. If I worked here, all of that would be gone," he replied. Marco had had a feeling that would be his answer, and it was completely justified.

He nodded in understanding. But he didn't know what to do to fix this, to make Ace feel better. Marco was selfish and would not give Ace up, even if it made him feel like crap, doing it this way. Ace deserved more than Marco could give him. But he wouldn't ever give Ace up. He was a terrible person.

Ace passed out, his sleep attacks more frequent when he was emotional, and so Marco carried him up the stairs and to his normal couch, laying down on the couch with Ace resting on top of him. Marco was a couple inches taller than Ace, so he fit just fine. Spade was a good dragon and guarded the door. Maybe to protect Ace, maybe to make sure nobody interrupted them.

While Ace slept on him, Marco tried to come up with a plan, how to help his lover. How to help himself. Ace didn't deserve to live with cruel people, no matter if he acted like he didn't care. He did. Or at least he had, and it did cause him problems later in life. Marco just hadn't seen or heard of them yet.

He would do everything to come up with a solution, to make Ace happy. Happy but free at the same time. Nami was used to her job. Ace had been raised to take care of himself, not take care of others. Even if he had cooked and cleaned for his step family for years, he still spit in their food and pissed them off. He still annoyed them, tried to get back at them.

Nami was raised to take care of Vivi, even though the princess took care of her as well when they were alone. This would be hard. Would Pops accept Ace? Maybe he could become more of a godson than an employee. After all, the king had once been very close friends with Ace's father. So, would he make him be a worker?

If not, there was still the problem of hiding things from his family. From everyone in the palace besides Izo and Vivi. He didn't want to hide his love, but he felt he had no choice. He was too cowardly to come clean and just hope for the best. Maybe that's what Ace needed, though.

Marco wasn't brave enough, at least not now. He really was a coward.