Kāi Mén Jiàn Shān - 开门见山
katocchi
If you had asked me last night, I would've said a quiet Erxi was as rare as a call from my ex-husband, and today, the Universe decided to blindside me with both.
After a whole morning of silenceand a work partner completely focused on her own tasks instead of slacking like usual, my mediocre lunch was interrupted by a police siren. The girls I was with perked up and crowded the windows to see the commotion, craning their necks for familiar flashes of red and blue, and I almost followed until my vibrating bag bumped against my hip. Fishing my cellphone from the side pocket, I checked the name flashing across the screen and slipped out of the break room.
By the time I stumbled into an empty hallway, the ringing had stopped, and I couldn't tell if I was relieved or disappointed by the missed chance. Either way, my hands kept shaking with phantom trembles, and I wiped them on my skirt, trying to rid the sweat that wouldn't stop coming. My blouse stuck uncomfortably to my skin. I really hoped I wouldn't have to wave off armpit stains in the bathroom later.
My phone vibrated again, and I nearly dropped the device as I fumbled for the buttons.
Deep breath, I accepted the call.
The line was quiet. I broke the stillness first with a cautious Hello?
"Chunhua," came the baritone reply a moment later, and I bit back the urge to end the call and throw the phone across the corridor.
I braced my arm against the wall and leaned my forehead on top, but even with my sleeves rolled up, it wasn't enough. I pressed my face to the wall. Rough against my cheek, but cool enough from the poor air conditioning to make me realize I was overheating. My throat closed around the syllables of his name, a bundle of history and hurt that I swallowed, waiting for why he was contacting me after all this time.
Minutes passed. He didn't say anything.
I hung up.
On the way back to my desk, I swung by the break room to gather my things, grateful that the girls had condensed my lunch box and files before they left, and dumped the rest of my food in the compost. Erxi was still in her seat, shoulders hunched as she re-worked another rejected proposal. She didn't look up as I dropped into my chair, and admittedly, part of me was looking forward to her usual Welcome back! if only to know that someone appreciated my presence.
My spinning pen flew out from between my fingers and skittered across the space to his her hand, and she stopped moving. No acknowledgement. Only nudged the pen across the invisible barrier, and I found myself blurting out:
"I dropped out of college."
That got her attention.
She opened her mouth to say something, but a look of hurt flashed in her eyes, and she turned back to her work.
"I dropped out of college to have a kid," I continued, and despite her best efforts to hide her curiosity, her ear tilted towards me. "Weren't you full of questions at the staff dinner? I'm answering them now."
Finally, she made eye contact. "The staff dinner was weeks ago," she said slowly.
"If you're no longer interested, I don't mind," I said with a casual shrug. Her hand came down on my wrist as I moved away. "Yes?"
"So does this mean you have a kid?"
"I don't. I was so stressed about the dropout and organizing a shotgun wedding that a small accident made me lose the baby."
Her mouth formed a comically large Oh, and her eyes softened. I waved off her attempts at consolation.
"I'm nearing my thirties. It was years ago. But since I answered two of your questions, you have to answer one of mine: what has you so upset today?"
Not only starting conversation, but pushing it forward. Prying into her personal life. Today was a day of surprises.
"Is it that obvious?"
"Very."
Her shoulders curled, creasing her already impossible wrinkled button-down, but I kept my gaze neutral. There were times to rip into her less than professional habits, and this was not one of them.
"Do you remember Cao Guang?"
Before I could answer, she plowed on, assuming correctly that the name hadn't passed my wall of Ignoring Erxi's Stories.
"He's someone I knew from school, works as an English guide and translator now. We had a department reunion yesterday, and a friend of mine brought him as a guest. She thought it'd be nice for us to meet." She side-eyed me, hesitant. "We had―a history. One-sided."
Ah. "Are you upset with your friend?"
She shook her head. "She had my best interest at heart and didn't know that Cao Guang and I would get drunk and argue so loudly. We got kicked out of the reunion." She buried her face in her palms, groaning. "He said I was nosy. Always making so much noise and distracting people. I was mad at first, but I thought about it more, and he's right."
"Hence your silence now."
She allowed herself a miserable nod as she schooled her features into something resembling normalcy.
"Well...your turn to ask a question." I picked up my pen, wondering whether I'd regret opening the floodgates.
a/n.
i know this will eventually be cao guang x erxi as told through an uninvolved third party, but i lowkey want to push chunhua and erxi together. also, it took like 2 months for cao guang to finally appear in passing LOL
i realized last week that my headers have been saying "aerysian," which is my username on almost every place other than FFN and AO3, and i'm mortified. i changed all the previous chapters on AO3, but it's a little more tedious on FFN so uhh, ignore them pls. it'll say "katocchi" from now on.