*Sigh* And to think some of you were excited for flashforwards…

Warning: Violence

Disclaimer: JK Rowling owns Harry Potter. Art work by the awesome Meg (tumblr: anxiouspineapples)

Tell Him

February? 6th Year

"Rise and shine, Mudblood whore!" Lily jolted awake to the noise coming from the other side of the door. She'd only grown to hate that voice so much more these past few weeks than she already had. At least she assumed it had been weeks. She actually had no idea how much time she'd been locked away here. For all she knew it could have been months. Maybe days. She was pretty sure it had been at least a week. The confusion was probably due to all the memory charms they kept hitting her with. Her shoulder ached from lying on it on the cold, damp floor, unable to find any other comfortable position with the chain secured around her neck. "The Dark Lord wants to see you!"

"Frank," she whispered hoarsely, weakly reaching her fingers to the bars separating their cells. How could a move so small send this many stabbing pains through her body?

Frank Longbottom's formerly warm, brown eyes, currently sunken deep in his face, opened to hers. He extended his filthy fingers to touch hers.

"If I don't come back—" she choked on her words. She should have been used to it by now, but every time one of them was hauled from this tiny room, it felt like they'd never see each other again. They worried any day now, they'd finally be put out of their misery by some overeager Death Eater or by succumbing to the torture and losing their minds for good.

"I'll tell him." Frank swallowed, trying to put on a brave face for Lily; it was quite the feat considering his face was pressed down against dirty concrete. He watched as her lip trembled. It was so much harder first thing in the morning, before she'd properly had a chance to slowly turn off all her fear. She had to keep fighting. She had to hold on just a little while longer. "I'll tell James Fleamont Potter that you're sorry. And that you loved him."

And there was the reason why she hadn't given up yet. A tear escaped Lily's eye as she tried to laugh, but it came out as a strangled cough instead. Her whole body ached. "Yeah, don't tell the wrong one." Lily tried not to focus on the fact that Frank's past response to this plea had been, 'Tell him yourself.' She didn't want to dwell on the reality that they were both starting to lose hope. She didn't want to remember how he'd recently told her all the things she had to tell Alice if he didn't live to tell her himself. Now was not the time to surrender to those type of thoughts.

The door opened and Lily was unchained and dragged out by her hair.

November, 6th Year

"Lily love, are you ready for Dah-luhl-ee?" James asked as he joined up with her and Marlene after History of Magic.

Lily looked up at him uncertainly. "Are you speaking Dutch?"

Sirius popped up. "Oh! That would be dead helpful if we ever make it to Amsterdam!" He looked up dreamily as if deep in thought. "All those brothels. Say Lily, would you be mad if Prongsie went? To a brothel I mean?" Everyone ignored him. Lily had noticed Sirius had started to do that a lot recently: tried to get a reaction out of her. She guessed he'd always been that way, but now the quips weren't mean, they were just trying to get her to fess up to feelings she hadn't fully figured out herself yet.

"Anyway, back to me," James announced. "Not Dutch, D.A.H.L.E. class. Remember?" His twinkling eyes gave him away a second before his words did. "Defense Against the Horny Li—"

Lily slapped a palm over his mouth. "Yes, Potter. I'm ready. Are you?" She flipped her hair over her shoulder confidently.

He smirked so damn hard as Lily walked off with Marlene in front of him, standing there staring after her dumbly.

Sirius patted his back. "You're in over your head, mate." He wasn't sure if James even heard him.

Without the distraction of James in the sky, Lily actually got to enjoy Adam's company at the Hufflepuff versus Ravenclaw game. There was also the added bonus of Paxton nearly falling off of his broom when he spotted her sitting next to his brother in the opposing team's stands.

Recalling how James had reacted to seeing her wearing the same hat from their date out when with Adam last time (how the hell did he remember that?!) she decided to forego wearing her favorite yellow jumper this time. She viewed it as a compromise — she wasn't going to give up hanging with her cute friend, but she wouldn't go out of her way to rub it in his face (again?) either.

She nearly reconsidered her courtesy when she went to steal Adam's yellow beanie to wear herself and he clutched it to his head like his life depended on it. "Please don't!"

Lily tittered. "Why?"

Adam's entire face reddened. Lily's heart automatically went out to him. "It's nothing. Just between breakfast and going back to my dorm for my cloak, a zit the size of England materialized on my forehead."

"Oh." Lily tried not to look disgusted. Then it hit her. "Oh."

Lily pushed James forcefully backwards into one of their favorite deserted classrooms, causing him to stumble into the teacher's chair as she locked the door. She spun to him and crossed her arms.

"Did you hex Adam's forehead today?" she asked sternly.

James leaned back, interlocking his fingers behind his head, perfectly calm and collected. "Why Evans, you think so little of me."

A fine deflection if she'd ever heard one. "Did you?" she demanded again as she pushed her knickers down from under her skirt and shimmied them over her knee socks to the ground.

James stilled, his eyes traveling from her panties to her face, trying to gauge her next move. Lily couldn't help but notice that suddenly his power stance didn't look quite as powerful.

"Because," she grabbed his right hand from off his hair and placed it on her warm cunt under her skirt, "I don't know if I can sleep with a bully." Just as James' thumb found her clit, ready to get to work, she pulled his hand back and straddled him instead. She put a finger over his parted lips, stopping his protests before they were even uttered. His eyes went wide. She brought the same finger down to touch herself, right above his lap. "And wouldn't that be a shame?" she moaned letting her head tilt back slightly so she was now watching him from under heavy lids.

"Lily," he said breathlessly, his hands squeezing her thighs surrounding him. He seemed unable to decide just where he was supposed to be looking, everything being too good to be true.

Her free hand cupped the back of his neck, bringing his forehead to hers. "Say it, James," she purred, brows creasing from the feelings her own fingers were creating down below.

He drank her in hungrily. "Say what?" How he spoke told her he'd literally say anything she asked.

He tried kissing her but Lily pulled back grinning. "Tell me you won't hex anyone else for the fun of it." Her loud panting was intoxicating him, making him so jealous to be excluded from her fun.

"Okay deal," James rushed, his hands moving up her thighs desperately.

"I need to hear it," Lily whispered, leaning in to nibble on his earlobe, eliciting a groan from him.

"Fuck, I won't hex anyone unless they really deserve it, happy? Now, please—" James' fingers were pulling on her arse cheeks, trying to rub her body over his erection.

"Damn, so needy," Lily drawled, crossing her arms over her chest and yanking up the hem of her jumper.

James' irises went hazy as he let out a contented sigh. Lily smiled at him proudly. "Like what you see?"

She giggled as James growled and pulled her mouth to his, tangling his hands in her locks as he viciously snogged her. Lily preceded to ride him until he forgot his own name, too busy groaning out hers instead.

"I need to talk to you." Lily couldn't believe it was Snape speaking to her when she turned around to find him in the hall. She'd thought she'd made her feelings perfectly clear towards him last time they'd spoken. She wondered just how long he'd been waiting to get her alone… She guessed leaving the prefects meeting when Remus was sick was his golden opportunity.

"I don't really care what you need Severus. Goodnight," she brushed him off.

"You're in danger," he yelled to her back, making her stop in her tracks. He was probably bluffing, and it was a pretty low blow, but how could she not be at least a little bit curious with his outburst?

She turned to him, hitching her bag higher up her shoulder. She shrugged in a very 'well?' kind of way.

"Not here." Snape ushered her into a nearby classroom.

"Door stays open," Lily sighed, crossing her arms.

A dark look flashed over his face. "Right. We don't want your boyfriend to get the wrong idea. Especially since you're already strutting around every—"

Lily rolled her eyes. Rumors had started to circulate around the castle that Evans and Potter may indeed be giving things another go (they truly weren't being that subtle at all anymore…) However, this time around, Lily found she didn't actually give a shit what everyone else thought. "Is this seriously why you wanted to talk to me?" She made to leave.

"No." Snape took a deep breath. "You're actually in danger. But I have a plan."

Lily grimaced. "Whatever it is, I already know I'm not interested."

"Lily, stop, this is no longer child's play!" His eyes had gone crazed, trying to impart the gravitas of the situation.

"What are you—"

"The Dark Lord is interested in you."

Lily stared at him in utter disbelief, but he remained completely frozen, staring right back. He wasn't joking. "Voldemort," Snape flinched, "is interested in me?"

"Yes." Snape watched as Lily's composure crumbled.

"Why?!"

"I'm not exactly sure, but I think he wants to recruit you."

"What the fuck are you talking about? I'm a Mudblood, remember?"

Snape stepped towards her with a glimmer of hope. "It's not all about blood with him. He values intelligence and loyalty too." He stood a little straighter. "Take me for example: I'm not a Pureblood, but he gave me a chance, Lily. I think he's willing to give you one too."

So he'd joined then. She knew this day would come, she knew he'd been interested and that his friends were monsters, but it was still a punch the gut to have it be flat-out confirmed. He'd joined a cult that was actively trying to eradicate people like his former best friend: her. Lily's eyes darted all over him, suddenly very scared. Someone who was this unpredictable, who somehow thought that she, Lily Evans, would join the side that hated the very people who had raised her, must be violently deranged. She staggered back. He didn't seem to be holding onto his wand at the moment.

"Lily," he said pleadingly, looking almost feral, "I have power now. Let me share it with you."

"I don't want power, Severus! What is wrong with you! I just want fuckheads like you not to treat me like shit just because I'm different!" She felt her heat rising.

"Then join me! Show them! Join us and show everyone how powerful you are! It's all about power Lily. We can show them, together." He took another step forward. She felt paralyzed by the greedy glint in his eye. "You and me."

What the fuck happened to him!? How was I friends with him? "There is no fucking you and me! Why can't you get that?!"

Lily's insults just seemed to roll off of him. She wondered how long he'd actually been like this — so blinded by his quest for influence that everything else failed to register. He drove on wholly unperturbed, scaring Lily even more. No means fucking no. "Lily. You don't have a choice. Once the Dark Lord wants something — he gets it. At least if you come with me, I can ensure that things go… smoother for you."

Lily's emerald eyes went painfully wide. "So you're threatening me, then?"

"No, Lily. I'm in his inner circle, I can vouch for you—"

Lily started laughing nervously. The idea that a barely 17 year old boy's input could somehow be valued by the most dangerous wizard of all time was just that: laughable.

"Don't laugh at me." Snape's greasy face blanched.

For some reason, seeing him stomp his feet, having this tantrum only made the whole situation more twisted and comical. The guffaws falling from her mouth got louder and louder.

"Stop!" Snape's open palm connecting with Lily's cheek snapped her out of it. Suddenly, all she could think about was all the times Rick had done the same. Lily's broken wrist had taught her very quickly that not fighting back against someone physically stronger than her was her best course of action, no matter how hard that was. No matter how much it tested her temper. It had gotten easier with time. And thankfully, the break had occurred after James had alerted her to the fact that she could use magic while in London undetected, thus her recovery had been rather painless. "This isn't funny!"

He hit you. He fucking hit you, her mind reeled. Lily knew the statistics, she knew kids who were abused were more likely to continue the cycle, just like Snape was doing. She had internally scolded herself every time that she had slapped James, willing herself to be better than that… but Snape had hit her. Because I laughed at him.

"I'm trying to help you, Lily. I don't want to loose you!"

Lily responded hollowly. "You already have."

"No, I—"

"And now you've killed me." Lily looked at him lifelessly.

"What?"

"You've marked me, Snape. Now when you scurry back to Voldemort, you have to tell him I denied him. You've all but signed my death warrant."

Snape swallowed uneasily, clearly not having thought about it from this angle. "No, I'm trying to help you! I've seen you over the past year. You've completely lost yourself, Lily, let me give you purpose. Let me show you what life could be like—"

Snape reached to grab Lily's arm but yelped and sprang back as though he'd been burned when his skin touched hers. Lily hardly noticed.

"Tell your master I can't wait till he rots in hell. Tell him I'll put him there myself if I have to. Tell him I said no."

Next Chapter: She Doesn't Know

**Tiff defends her choices: I know Lily not fighting back after Snape hits her will piss people off (I mean, didn't we all love when Hermione punches Draco in the face…), hell, it pisses me off, but I have my reasoning — Lily didn't physically fight Voldemort when he was about to kill her. James tried to, but she didn't. She tried reasoning and pleading with him for Harry's life instead. Also, in my story, Lily is very traumatized and trying her best to survive. I do believe someone who's been through what she has would know exactly what to do to make her life easier, even if it is seen as the 'weaker' option. And yes she punched Mulciber, but that was for someone else (and before her trauma). I do believe there are people out there who will literally murder for others but have a hard time defending themselves.