Chapter 10

What if we don't live forever? What if you have just one chance to get it right in this life? We don't always get second chances, an opportunity to amend our mistakes and maybe that's why Alex is hesitating on what to do next.

How many times has she had this conversation in her mind? How many times has she dreamed with the day she would see her again? She, the little girl who was her bigger fan. She, the girl who followed her everywhere, looking at her with so much admiration and love. Just recalling those old days, a warm smile spreads all over Alex's face till a very scary Luthor sits in front of her.

If looks could kill, Alex is sure that she would be already on the other side by now. The only question is why?

"You don't like me…"

"No."

Lena shows no hesitation in admitting she's no fan of Alex. And Alex doesn't understand why she's getting this hostile welcome from her till the raven-haired woman decides to speak her mind.

"How dare you look for Kara now? You kicked her out! You put her in the streets when she was just a teen! And, now you're here?!"

The CEO angrily bares her teeth. She's losing her temper, she knows it but she cannot help it, especially when she recalls all the things that Kara has told her about the past…

"It's raining…"

Kara pouts when she looks through the window the storm that's happening outside. The blonde looks unhappy because today was supposed to be a day on the park, they even prepared a nice picnic to eat outside but thanks to the rain, that plan is gone, or at least that's what the blonde was thinking till she turned around and found Lena, moving the fournitures of the living room.

"What are you doing?"

Lena doesn't reply, she just moves the sofa and the coffee table so she can put some blankets and pillows in the middle of the room. The basket with the food comes next as well as the use of her new home theater she especially made for Kara. At the push of a button, all the shutters shut down, the entire place gets in the dark till the projection starts and somehow, they find themselves in the middle of a forest. The white walls are now green woods, slowly moving at the rhythm of the sweetly sing of the birds and 'Wow' is the only thing which escapes from Kara's mouth. The dear blonde is amazed about how real it looks. It's really amazing.

"I can even hear the birds…"

Kara closes her eyes and smiles, letting her senses be taken by the perfect scenario created for her. The sun, breaking through the canopy of the forest. A few birds flying around, swinging from branch to branch as they chirp the sweetest melody that Kara has ever heard. A melody she knows too well, a melody from…

"Midvale… OMG! This is the forest of Midvale!"

"Yes, you've mentioned how much you loved that forest so…"

"So, you brought it to me…?"

Lena nods, she smiles thinking she did a good choice of scenario for their picnic but she has second thoughts about her choice of set design when she sees tears appearing in Kara's eyes.

"Oh, God! You don't like it!"

Lena is ready to change the scenario but before she could touch her tablet and set the changes, Kara stops her. She asks her to leave it this has been years since she left that place, she still sees it in her dreams but looking at it now, hearing the birds and their sweet song again, It's more than what she could ever wish for.

"I'm not upset, Lena. These tears are not because I'm upset, on the contrary, I'm… I'm… I've no words to describe what I'm feeling, but believe me when I tell you, this is good. This is more than good. Thank you"

Lena' smile gets bigger when the blonde admits how much she loves the scenario. It's the first time that Lena uses her brain to make someone else happy and that's because making Kara happy, it makes her so damn happy, more than what she could ever imagine even if at this point Lena cannot really understand why.

In the middle of the living room, they have their perfect picnic. And, even if Kara knows this is not the real forest of Midvale, she lets herself go to memoryland and before knowing it, she's sharing all kinds of anecdotes with Lena.

"I can't believe you looked for Bigfoot in the forest of Midvale…"

Lena chuckles, she can imagine Kara at the age of 12, camping out there, putting mud all over her face as camouflage. Waiting to catch a fantasy. It's silly but also the cutest thing that Lena can ever imagine.

"Don't laugh, Lena! Bigfoot is real! I'll find it one day to prove it!"

"Sure, you will darling…"

The sweet nickname doesn't go unnoticed by the two girls. For a brief moment, Lena panics, not sure why such a tender word slipped out of her lips. She's sure that Kara will make a remark about it, but the blonde is more alarmed in hiding the blush of her cheeks than in understanding why Lena called her 'darling'. With the hands cupping her own face, Kara mumbles something to herself as she shakes her head non-stop, she's trying to calm down her heart and her mind. And once again, Lena gets to see that Kara is really the cutest thing on Earth.

Lena starts chucking and when the blonde notices her, she chuckles too, following her lead. Time flies, it's already late and the night comes too into their private forest. The birds stop singing but their melody gets replaced by the sounds of the owl and the little crickets as the ceiling gets illuminated when the stars finally start to shine.

"Just like h-..."

Kara gulps hard, she hasn't called Midvale her home since she left. And, she sadly doesn't dare to call it her home now. The brunette senses the change of mood in the pregnant woman, she doesn't know why Kara looks so sad now, but if there's something that can cheer her up, that's food. That's why Lena stands up fast and rushes to the kitchen, looking for something sweet because Kara loves everything that has tons of sugar in it, Lena has no idea of what she's really looking for but when her eyes peek a bag of marshmallows, a great idea gets in motion, in her head.

"Lena, what are you trying to do now?"

The dear CEO doesn't reply, once again she wants to surprise Kara but she groans, looking upset when she unsuccessfully tries to light up her chimney. It has always been just part of the decor, but she knows it's functional even if she doesn't know how. Kara laughs very loud when she understands that the smartest woman on Earth doesn't know how to set a fire in her own chimney.

"Here, let me do it…"

Now, it's Lena's turn to look amazed when Kara quickly sets the sparking fire.

"You're good at this kind of stuff, darling. Now, I know who to call if I ever gets lost in a forest."

Kara chuckles, she blushes again with the word 'darling' but she doesn't complain about it, to be honest, she likes it a lot, the idea of Lena constantly calling her 'darling', it makes her happy. Her brain starts to wonder why, and, Kara shakes her head, trying to shake off those kinds of questions from her mind. She doesn't want to understand why she loves so much when Lena calls her darling, she just wants to enjoy it.

Trying to think of something else, Kara wonders if she would really be the best option to call if the other woman needs help in the forest, she doesn't believe she's the best option to call in case of emergency. Thinking about it, the best option would be to call someone like…

"Alex. She's the one you want to call if you need help to survive in the middle of nowhere"

"Alex? Who's Alex?"

Lena wants to take it back, her question makes the blonde uncomfortable but before she could change the topic of the conversation, the blonde decides to reply.

"Alex is… was my sister. Well, my step sister…"

A shy smile spreads over her lips as she recalls the dear sibling she cared for, so much.

"Oh, I'm sorry for your loss, Kara."

"What? Oh, no! When I said 'was', I didn't mean she's… you know…"

Lena nods, she understands that this Alex is not dead but she's still confused why Kara used past tense to mention her relationship with the other girl. But, after all, who's she to judge? She did the same with Lex. Everytime someone asked about him, she always talked about him as if he was gone forever. It's sad now that she thinks about it, because now that he's really gone, she cannot stop waking up, thinking she will see him again as soon as she opens her eyes each morning.

Both girls deeply sigh, looking sad as they recall their siblings. Just the cozy fire and the idea of putting marshmallows to roast on the fire brings warmth to their hearts. They are roasting the marshmallows when Kara decides to keep sharing something about herself.

"I didn't want to be adopted. When my parents died, I felt like I died too with them. I didn't care about anything till I got to live with the Danvers. Somehow, they brought me back to life, they gave me reasons to live"

A tiny smile appears in their faces as Kara keeps talking about all her favorite memories with the Danvers. Movie nights, camping in the middle of the forest, roasting marshmallows as they are doing it right now. Alex, defending her at the school. So many beautiful moments to remember that Lena doesn't get what went wrong so Kara finished as a runaway. The raven-haired woman was about to ask when a cascade of tears started to drop from Kara's blue eyes, this time they are not happy tears because Kara recalls the day Jeremiath died.

"He died. I'm sure he had the heart attack because of me! I killed him! It was my fault, our fight killed him and that's why Alex asked me to go! To leave the house because I killed her father and I wasn't welcome anymore…"

Lena gets a knot in her throat, she has no words to say, the only thing she can do, it's to offer a shoulder to cry and Kara takes it, she buries her crying face on Lena who holds her tight.

"Alex told me I killed him, just like I killed my parents, and, she's right, I kill everything around me! Just like Clark and Lex…"

"What?!"

'Oh no, she's gonna hate me too' it's what Kara thinks when she understands what just slipped out of her mouth. Detaching herself from the crying woman, Lena shakes Kara from the shoulders, trying to force the girl to explain what she just said. Between sobs and tears, Kara explains how she blames herself for the accident of Lex & Clark.

"They went out because I was craving ice cream. It's my fault, Lena, I killed them!"

Bursting into tears, Kara begs for forgiveness even if she doesn't really believe she deserves it. The blonde was getting ready to receive the same kind if reponse like the one she got from Alex back then. Once again, she will be kicked out. Maybe Lena will also say horrible things to her, maybe she will also slap her face and look at her with nothing more than hate & anger, just like Alex did. It will break her heart, but, she will understand, she will not hold it against Lena, just like she doesn't hold it against Alex because she's the one to blame.

Yeah, Kara was getting ready to relive what happened years ago with Alex. Far she was to imagine that contrary to Alex, Lena's love would be stronger than any other thought.

"Oh, Kara. It's not your fault, it has never been your fault. I've nothing to forgive, you did nothing wrong…"

Now, it's Lena who cannot hold the tears anymore. Lena cries because it breaks her heart to think that all this time, Kara has been burdened with such guilt. Realizing that Lex might have died for a silly reason like looking for ice cream in the middle of the night, it makes her anger, but, that anger is not against Kara, her rage is against the cruel fate that was settled for her dear brother.

Fate can be cruel so many times, Lena knows that better than anyone else, she hopes Kara could understand that too but all Kara can hear in her head, it's the harsh words of Alex, blaming her for the Death of all those she has ever loved.

"No, no, no! It's my fault Lena! I killed them! I kill everything I love!"

"NO! Kara, you didn't kill Lex & Clark. You didn't kill Jeremiah and you definitely didn't kill your parents, Kara!"

Kara starts crying again, louder. Deep down, she knows Lena is right, she's not a killer but, she cannot let go of Alex's words, she cannot stop feeling guilty for causing so much pain to the Danvers and, that's why from this moment on, the name of Alex Danvers will make Lena furious.

It's because of Alex's harsh words that Kara takes the blame for everything bad that happens around her, it's because of Alex that Kara became a runaway, a girl who barely survived on the streets, a girl who's incapable to let love in because she's too afraid to kill it too.

Yes, Lena doesn't like Alex, she doesn't like her at all! And, she's trying to control her nerves by killing Alex in her mind over and over. Alex has no idea of the bloody scenarios that are running all over Lena's mind, but, looking at the lethal gaze of the CEO, Alex gulps hard, feeling a cold chill, her senses of survival activate, settling a red alarm in her head.

"Sam, she wants to kill me, doesn't she?"

"I don't know, but she definitely has the resources to do it…"

Alex gulps harder, what her girlfriend just said, it doesn't make her feel any better. And, a big devious smirk forms on Lena's lips when she sees how scared Alex looks like, because of her.

'Good, be afraid' Lena thinks, because if Alex is here just to crash Kara's heart once again, she'll better get ready to live in hell because that's what Lena will bring to her if she dares to make Kara cry ever again.

"Miss Luthor. Can you stop looking at me like that? It scares the shit out of me"

"If you don't like how I look at you, you're more than welcome to leave, Ms. Danvers…"

"You know my last name?"

"I know who you are and what have you done…"

"What I have done?"

"YES! What you've done! Because who do you think you are to ask Kara to take the blame for the death of your father! YOU b-…!"

Kara makes soft circles over Lena's hand, the brunette deeply sighs, she can feel how her mood magically changes with the soft touch of the dear blonde. And that's why Lena holds her tongue, and just crosses her legs and arms as she tries to control the protective beast she has inside herself.

The room stays in silence for a long moment. No one dares to start the talk. Alex is feeling upset about the way Lena stormed against her, one part of her wants to walk away and leave but then she looks at Kara, at the blonde who's already 7 months pregnant and she finds no other words to say than…

"You're pregnant…"

Kara nods, she keeps her eyes on her lap as she nervously plays with her glasses.

"How is that possible?"

Lena rolls her eyes, she speaks on behalf of the two of them and clearly explains to Alex that is not her business and if she's here to get the talk about how babies comes to the world, she should leave now before Lena changes her mind and shows her the real reason why everyone is afraid of the Luthors.

"I know what Luthors are capable of, believe me, I do. You don't need to threat me"

Lena angrily hums, wondering what Alex is trying to imply. Alex & her stare at each other without blinking an eye, it's like they were getting ready to fight and Kara doesn't like the idea of the two of them fighting so...

"Alex. You're making Lena uncomfortable so, if you're not gonna say anything then leave…"

Now it's Kara who's kicking her out and it's a bitter feeling for the two of them. Alex knows she has to say something before it's too late, she didn't come to leave like that, but what do you say to someone you broke? How do you bring back to your life someone you horrible kicked out?

"Alex…"

"I'm sorry. Oh, god! I'm so sorry Kara..."

Alex bursts in tears, she covers her crying face with her hands, ashamed to show her face, ashamed of how she reacted to the death of her father. And from all the possible things that Kara thought Alex wanted to say, this was never one of them. Alex fully exposes her remorse. She never really wanted to kick Kara out. She understood her mistake the morning after it happened but it was too late to redeem herself.

"I thought you would come back the next day. I thought you would walk through the door and I would apologize and everything would be okay but you never came back."

"Why would I return to the house? I wasn't welcome anymore into your home…"

Alex gulps hard with tears in her eyes when she hears the harsh words of the blonde. The bubble girl who always smiled at her, is gone. Kara is not anymore the little sister who loved Alex more than anything else in this world and, Alex feels sad about it, mostly because she knows it is her fault.

"I'm sorry if I made you feel not welcome. But, you shouldn't have left home, just like that…"

"It was never my home, Alex…"

"NO! Do not say that! It was your home! It's still your home, Kara!"

Kara shakes her head non-stop, strongly refusing to agree on what Alex is saying.

"Midvale is your home, Kara! Your home is…"

"HERE! ME! This is her home! With ME!"

"Her home cannot be with a Luthor. I refuse to accept that!"

"And, I dare you to do something about it!"

Lena stands up, stiffening, imposing her authority. With a cold challenging look, it's very clear that Alex is not feeling confident to contradict her, especially when she notices how Kara smiles when Lena says that she belongs to her. The blonde looks at Lena in a way that reveals more than what words could say, something that doesn't go unnoticed by Alex.

"Lena is right, Alex. This is my real home, Lena is my home"

Lena smiles when Kara holds her hand, the anger is gone, the beast inside herself calms down because there's just love, real love what Lena is feeling right now. Sam and Alex see how they look at each other with nothing else than complete adoration and the dear Danvers has no idea about the real nature of their relationship, but, it's obvious there's something there, something she dislikes a lot because she knows something that Kara ignores.

Alex hates the Luthor name and she refuses to let Kara believe she belongs with a Luthor. But, will she able to get back her sister and separate her from the only heir of Luthor's legacy? Alex might lack what is necessary to split them off but someone else has all the power to break them apart with a simple snap of her fingers. And that person is no one else than the oldest Luthor alive.

Across town, Lillian Luthor deviously smirks when she gets into the big office of an old friend, loving the weight of her name when the other person looks at her with a little hint of fear. It's good to be feared and to be honest, big part of the reason everybody is afraid of the Luthor name, it's because of her.

Lillian is back in town, and a visit to Lena is on the agenda. The arrival of Alex has unchained something, something that will escalate to a whole other level with Lillian's presence. Will Lena & Kara be able to face together the secrets of the past? Or, will destiny be cruel once again with them, and tearing them apart?