A/N: I can't believe I forgot it was Keith's birthday! Happy birthday, Keith! In celebration of his birthday (and me getting out of my funk), here is another chapter :) Enjoy!
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Lance didn't know what to think. In fact, he couldn't. Keith's mouth on his made the world stop, and maybe his breathing too. Lance wanted to stay here forever.
One moment he was giggling to the interaction between Keith and Pidge, secretly hoping Keith would kiss him. The next moment, well, he did. Keith's hand was in his hair and pulled him in for a solid kiss. Lance could barely react before it was over. His heart was thudding, breathing nearly stopped. He felt frozen in place, unable to register what was happening.
"Coran, I dare you to lock Pidge in her room." Keith could feel the heat in his cheeks, his heart pounding loudly. He didn't dare look back at Lance. He couldn't bare it if Lance hated him. So, he decided that it would be better to not know what his reaction was.
"Wait! No," Pidge's grin morphed into a shocked expression. "He has to choose!"
"I accept!" Coran stood and picked up Pidge like a princess. "Off we go!"
"Don't be sore, Keith!" She shouted as she was taken from the room. "It's just a dare!"
"Keith?" Hunk looked at him worried. I can't deal with this right now. They all probably think I'm lame. Upset over a dare? A dare to kiss someone? But I just admitted I was attracted to Lance. I just OUTTED MYSELF. Realization sunk in.
"I…" Keith realized he hadn't thought it through. His stomach turned. What was I thinking? I wasn't. "I'm going to bed." Keith got up and ran out trying to keep his emotions in check until he got to his room.
By then, he was gasping for breath, from running, from fear, and from the kiss. The kiss. It was not what he had expected, not when or how he wanted it, but it was still amazing. Lance's soft lips and the electricity that zinged through him. The way Lance leaned into it and kissed back. Or did I imagine that part? He didn't say anything.
Then the look Hunk gave him. Was he judging me? No, he's friends with Lance. Lance is bi. But maybe he only is okay with it because their friends? Maybe he doesn't approve of me kissing Lance? He knows who Lance's crush is. Does Hunk know I know Lance has a crush? Is he mad at me? The walls seemed to close in on Keith. Thoughts rushing through his mind. He needed a distraction. Something to make his mind stop.
"Lance?" Hunk tapped his shoulder. Wait, where did Keith go? Lance held his head in his hands in confusion. What just happened? Keith kissed me. He kissed me. I kissed Keith. "I think you have your answer."
"I…" Lance's head was spinning. Did that mean anything? Does he like me? The dare was to kiss someone right? Well, I was just there…No it was to kiss the most attractive person. Well, I was just there. No, it was on the whole ship. He has a crush on someone. Unless… "I have to go."
"Lance, are you okay?" Hunk followed him out the door.
"I don't know. It happened so fast. I just…I don't know what to think. I need to be alone." Lance opened his room door.
"It may have been a dare, but it was also a dare to kiss the most attractive person. Pidge may be sneaky and trying to push you together…but she's not dumb. She was trying to show you what Keith felt too. And obviously he finds you attractive." Hunk encouraged.
"That doesn't mean he wants to date me. I don't know what I want either. Except that I don't want to lose him. So maybe tell her not to meddle?" Lance shut the door and fell onto his bed.
"Hey Lance," Keith leaned in, brushing Lance's bangs away from his face. "I love you." Their lips connected softly, breaking briefly to smile. Lance pulled him back and kissed him more. Joy filled them both as they kissed and giggled. Until, Keith began kissing down his neck then back up to kiss Lance deeper, nipping at his lips and tongue.
Lance shot up in bed gasping for air. It was a dream. He thought in relief, then in despair. Just a dream. He got out of bed and wandered the halls. He must have been out for a few hours since all the room lights were out and the halls were dimmed. Lance had given up trying to stop the dreams of Keith. If he couldn't stop thinking of him when he was awake, how was he supposed to stop the dreams.
Lance stopped as he turned the corner and saw light leaking underneath the door to the training room. Keith? He hoped as he approached the door. When he cracked the door, he saw Keith punching a hanging bag. Lance watched the exhausted man with sweat running down his back, wondered how long he'd been there. He knew that Keith would train when he couldn't sleep, which was often, but Lance couldn't help but wonder if the reason tonight was because of the kiss. Before he could stop himself, Lance walked into the training room.
Keith dropped to the ground and drew in a deep breath. His sweat and tears mixed together. Get out of my head, Lance! He pleaded quietly. I can't have you, and now the kiss has made it worse. I can't lose you. I finally have something to fight for, something to get up in the morning for. But what happens now? Now, everyone will know my secret. How will this affect us? The team? Voltron?
Keith could feel the darkness sinking back in. Lance had been a light for him, even if the darkness never disappeared, he made it manageable. And now, he'd messed it up. Keith looked at his hands and the blood seeping through his gloves. A hand rested on his shoulder, and Keith stiffened. He knew exactly who it was.
"Keith…"
"I don't want to talk about it, Lance." A moment of silence, then he felt Lance's arms wrap around his shoulders and torso.
"Okay." Keith leaned his head against Lance's shoulders. He knew this didn't mean anything. He knew it would just hurt more. But he couldn't help himself. How have I fallen for him so fast and hard? "Let me take care of those hands?"
"Okay." Keith let Lance pull him up. He was feeling the exhaustion set in. There was an odd comforting and calming energy about Lance.
Lance led Keith to the bathroom and began taking off the gloves carefully. How long? Why does he do this to himself? Lance glanced at him for the millionth time, but Keith wouldn't look at him. He wasn't sure if it was because of the kiss or embarrassment for being walked in on. Or something else? Lance wiped the wounds with the alien equivalent of rubbing alcohol. Keith sucked air through his teeth but didn't pull away. Lance wrapped his hands gently and then just held them. He didn't want to let go, and Keith didn't pull away. So maybe he wanted to as well?
"You don't have to tell me anything…but be honest," Lance broke the silence. Keith finally looked at him while Lance was stroking the scars on his wrists. "If I leave you, will you be okay? Should I leave you alone?"
"I don't know."
"Okay, then I won't." Lance pulled him up and led him back down the hall. When they got to his room, Keith hesitated. "Our friendship isn't ruined, Keith. C'mon."
A big sigh fell from Keith as he followed Lance into the room. He had to fight back tears of relief as Lance pulled him onto the bed. They sat on there like they had so many times before. Leaned into each other like they had many times before. It felt so right, but after the kiss earlier, it was different. Stiff like it was the first time, but comfortable because they knew each other's shape and favorite positions.
"Don't leave me." Keith breathed, needing something solid to hold onto.
"I'm not going anywhere." Lance stroked his hair, wishing he could calm his mind.
Keith woke up to Lance shifting positions. He pulled Keith closer to his chest, arms wrapped around his back, and breathed into his hair. Sleep threatened to pull him back in, but he knew that they needed to be up before everyone else. Lance probably didn't want anyone getting the wrong idea, especially Keith. "Lance."
"Five more minutes…" He mumbled.
"Lance, it's morning. Also you're in my room." Keith pulled away and watched Lance groan about it being too early. His messy hair fell into his eyes.
"Maybe we can take a day off?" Lance smiled sheepishly at Keith, still half asleep.
"Take a day off from being the saviors of the universe?" Keith chuckled. "And what would we do?"
"Go home." Lance's smile was still there but had turned sad. "Dance in the rain, see the mountains, see…" Keith knew how Lance longed to see his family. Anytime they seemed to have a break and the possibility of seeing Earth came up, it was soon thwarted. Something always came up, something more important. "Do you think time is passing here the same way it passes there?"
"I don't see why it wouldn't."
"I hope it doesn't. I hope that when we get back, it's only been a few hours. Nothing changed." Lance couldn't help but think about how worried his family was. Had he been declared dead? Did they give up looking for them? Would the garrison cover it up?
"I'm sure we'll go back soon." Keith lied. He didn't know when, if ever, they would go back.
"Hey love birds." Pidge sung as Lance and Keith came to breakfast.
"Love birds? Are you two dating?" Allura brought food to the table excitedly.
"What? No-"
"Well, they did kiss last night."
"You did?" Shiro nearly choked on his coffee.
"Only because Pidge dared us to!" Keith defended. They hadn't talked about the kiss, so he didn't know how Lance felt about it. He could be embarrassed or angry about it. Maybe he didn't want it brought up in front of Shiro, but he also knew Shiro was engaged.
"No, I only dared you to kiss the most attractive person on the ship." Pidge smirked.
"We-well…"
"He's right, I am the most attractive one here. I'm glad someone is finally recognizing the effort I put in each morning." Lance jumped in. It was clear that Keith wasn't ready to talk about it, and Pidge wasn't going to give up her fun.
"So, are you together then?" Coran asked.
"No, no, no, it was a dare." Keith fumbled. Lance tried not to let his disappointment show. He finds me attractive, but doesn't want to date me? Though I suppose that I can be the most attractive one and not be attractive to him?
"How about let's talk about something else?" Hunk interjected, pinching Pidge. "Shiro, we'd love to hear more about this fiancé."
"Hey Keith! What are you doing for Lance's birthday?" Pidge ran up to him in the hallway after training.
"His birthday? Wait, when is it?" Keith felt panic rise inside. Am I supposed to do something? What am I supposed to do? Keith didn't have much experience celebrating birthdays. His father wasn't a fan of it when he was around.
"Oh, not for a couple weeks. But since you never know when we'll land on a good tourist planet, Hunk and I are planning our gifts. Just wanted to make sure we're not doing the same thing." Pidge played it off. While she and Hunk were planning the birthday already, it wasn't why she was curious. Instead, she needed to make sure Keith didn't make it a disaster.
"Oh, I suppose I haven't thought about it…" Then an idea hit him. Earth. "Pidge, actually I may need your help with something."
"Oh? I'm all for scheming." Pidge flashed the same mischievous grin she had on during truth or dare. Wait, a second. Did Pidge plan the dare?
"Now what?" Hunk rounded the corner with Lance. He gave Pidge a look that Keith couldn't decipher.
"Nothing!" Pidge threw her hands up defensively. "We are completely innocent!"
"Well, I am. Not so sure about you though." Keith eyed Pidge.
"Rude."