Chapter 11

Not Mine, just borrowing them for a bit.

SPOV

The next couple weeks passed quickly, and Ranger and I were still working out the logistics of both being together and living together. It had been pretty great, overall. We'd had some disagreements, of course, but instead of both of us yelling and walking away as had been my modus operandi in previous relationships, we took time in separate spaces, cooled off and worked it out like adults. Look at me, Stephanie Plum, a real grownup. I had yet to deal with my mother or encounter Morelli, but I knew my luck was running out. I also knew at some point I had my "quarterly dinner" at home on the horizon. I hadn't decided if I should ask Ranger to go with me or not.

It was Wednesday, early in March and I'd just had a very productive day rounding up my latest skips, and decided I'd go ahead and collect my check from Connie before I headed back to Haywood for the day. Skips hadn't been as plentiful as usual, so I was glad I had the supplemental income of my Rangeman Contract. I walked into the office and stopped short. Standing in front of Connie's desk, clad in leather from head to toe was my archenemy, Joyce Barnhart. She had a sneer on her face and a stack of files in her hand.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't little Miss Rangeman," Joyce said.

"Was that supposed to be an insult? I'm happy to be known as a Rangeman," I said evenly.

"I'll take all of these," Joyce said, turning back to Connie.

Connie looked at me. I could read her face that it wasn't her choice or decision. "I don't have anything new for you, Steph," she said. "But I can get this direct deposited for you tomorrow."

"Thanks," I said, crossing the room. "Vinnie here?" I heard the door click shut. What a freaking coward. It's not like Ranger was asking to talk to him. I knocked politely first. When I didn't get an answer, I pulled the lock picking tool off my utility belt and, just like Slick had taught me, let myself into Vinnie's inner sanctum. I kicked the door closed, causing Vinnie to jump and slam shut his laptop. The sounds that continued coming from the speakers let me know I'd just interrupted his quality porno time.

"Christ! You've been hanging out with Ranger too much," Vinnie said. "I thought you guys were playing hide the salami, not doing B&E drills."

"Watch your tone," I said. "And what Ranger and I do is not anyone's business but our own. I want to know what Joyce is doing here with a stack of files."

"Look, Steph. I didn't have a choice. You were gone for like a month…"

"Bullshit," I said. "I cleared all my files before I left, and Rangeman even brought in seven low bonds when I was in Atlanta. I know they were far below the normal threshold Ranger has set. You were covered."

"She's not giving me a choice," Vinnie said.

"She, who?"

"Well, I don't actually know," he whined.

"What the fuck, Vinnie? I'm not in the mood for 20 questions," I ground out. "Fucking explain."

"OK, a few weeks ago I got an anonymous email from someone threatening to send some very compromising photos of me to Lucille. There were several attached to the message and she said there were others…"

"I fail to see how your wandering, diseased dick has anything to do with my job," I interrupted. "Maybe you shouldn't step out on your wife so much."

"These were from a long time ago. And I haven't had an active outbreak in like 8 weeks!"

"Ewww."

"Like you don't have an STD," he said. "So uptight. Geez."

"No, I don't have an STD! But let's get back to the part where you're giving my skips to Joyce."

"The email said I had to stop giving you skips by March 10th or the photos go to Lucille. I was going to talk to you next week. I actually didn't want you to find out like this. I know I give you a lot of shit but you always get your man. I was going to try to feed some of the lower bonds through Rangeman, but then I got another email last week that said I specifically needed to bring in Joyce. She was very grateful and…"

"STOP TALKING! Jesus. So, you're tossing me out because some person is blackmailing you with information that we're pretty sure Lucille and the entire 'burg already knows? I just want to make sure I have the story straight."

"It's worse than the duck," Vinnie said. "Harry might actually castrate me."

Harry the Hammer was Vinnie's father-in-law, and had earned his name the old-fashioned way in the mob. Vinnie really was between a rock and a hammer. And God help me, I actually felt sorry for the twisted, perverted fool that was my cousin. But there were some things I just didn't want to know. I covered my ears.

"Okey dokey, then. I guess I'm officially unemployed." I started toward his office door.

"Steph. I really am sorry. I don't have a choice. I don't have any right to ask, but would you maybe consider helping me find out who this is? Then you could come back." He sounded desperate.

"I'm not coming back, Vinnie. I love skip tracing, but I'm not willing to be yanked around." He actually looked surprised. "I'm not as desperate as I once was, Vinnie. If you send me send me the emails WITHOUT THE DAMN ATTACHMENTS and I'll think about looking into it." I walked out of his office, past Connie's desk and out the door without a backward glance. My grandeur was wearing off and I was trying not to think about the fact that I was now only partially employed. I really did like skip tracing and I wasn't sure what I'd do with all my extra time.

I was in the Santa Fe but I wasn't sure where I wanted to go now. It was late enough in the day I could head home to Haywood, but I really didn't want to face Ranger at the moment. I needed a little levity first. I called in an order at Pino's for 3 large pies and texted my best friend Mary Lou that I was on the way over with dinner. She texted back a thumbs up and smile instantly. I jogged in to the restaurant to pick up the order and opened the door to find myself face to face to Joe. Of fucking course. The perfect end to the perfect day.

"Cupcake," he said. "The boys and I have missed you." He reached out to embrace me.

I stepped back. "Hi Joe. Nice to see you." No, it wasn't fucking nice to see him; damned 'burg manners. "I'm just picking up an order to go." I tried to brush past him. He stepped closer, trapping me between his arms up against the wall.

"This has gone on long enough," he said. "When are you going to quit working for Vinnie and come home to me?"

"Joe. You need to back up. I don't know how to say it more clearly than I have. We are done. I returned your shit. I'm not going to change who I am."

He leaned in. "I heard about the apartment fire. You can't live with your parents forever, Cupcake. We can get married and then you won't have to work as a BEA anymore."

Jesus, it's like talking to a brick wall. "I'm not going to say it again, Joe. Back. The. Fuck. Up. And hear me when I say this: I will never be yours again. And I'm not living with my parents."

He pressed closer, using his weight to his advantage, learning down to kiss me. Unfortunately for him, I'd spent time learning to spar with Tank. Since my legs were trapped and I couldn't use my signature knee move, I drew back my hand and brought it swiftly to this throat. He hissed and coughed but didn't move. So, I sucker punched him. We'd attracted some attention then, and he stumbled back, holding his hand over his left eye. There wasn't anything left to say, so I grabbed my pizzas off the counter and headed back to the car. I texted Ranger to let him know I was eating with Mary Lou, but I didn't mention any other details.

By the time I got to Mary Lou's house, I didn't have to tell her to story, she'd already gotten 4 calls and 19 texts. I fucking hated living in this damn town. We each snagged a piece of pizza and she tossed the rest to Lenny and the 3 teenage boys. We sat on the porch swing and ate. We'd only texted since I'd been back from the cruise, so while she knew Ranger and I were together she hadn't heard all the stories. I filled her in on everything, while she listened like only a best friend can.

"You have to figure out how to separate Ranger your lover from Ranger one of your bosses," she said. "Sometimes I'm sure there will be situations, now that he's back at Rangeman, where he'll issue an order or command. You need to figure out how to accept it like an employee and not as a girlfriend. And he will have to figure out how to hear things you say as your boyfriend, not always as your boss."

"Like Bossy Ranger versus Sexy Ranger." I said.

"There's a learning curve, I think. But you guys can figure it out, Steph. I love seeing you so happy. You have stars in your eyes whenever you say his name. But you really need to talk to Ranger about all this. Ranger your boss and Ranger your boyfriend are both going to want to know about the situation with Vinnie and the altercation with Joe," she said.

"Are you kicking me out?" I said.

"You're always welcome here. But the kids are supposed to go to a movie tonight, so I'm looking to get lucky!" she announced, smiling unashamedly.

I waved goodbye and drove back to Haywood on autopilot, thinking about who I wanted to talk to first. I stood in the elevator, staring at the panel. I knew I definitely needed to talk to Ranger first, but I wasn't sure if it was Boss Ranger or Boyfriend Ranger. There were pro's and con's to each. Picking the right setting would help. I kept studying the panel, waiting for inspiration to come. I couldn't make up my mind. So I hit the B to take me down to the basement. I'd spend some time in the gun range while I built my courage. I grabbed 3 boxes of ammo and made my way to the lane at the far end of the range. I was halfway through the first box when I felt a tingle run down my neck. I turned and saw Ranger come through the double door. I smiled. I couldn't help but show off just a little, so I moved the paper man back another 30 feet and drilled some more rounds into him: head, heart, shoulders, knees, and a crotch shot at the end for good measure.

I felt his hands slide around my hips and he looked at me with pure lust in his eyes.

"I've missed a lot," he said. "My men taught you well, Babe."

"I'm sure there's plenty left for you to teach me," I said, pulling the tiger's tail. He pulled me further into him and kissed me.

"Why are you down here?" he asked, trailing kisses down my neck.

"Bad day," I said. I was having trouble focusing.

"Talk to me, Babe."

"I was trying to figure out which one of you I needed to talk to first," I said.

"Which one of who?"

"You. Ranger my Boss or Ranger my… Not Boss," I finished lamely. Ranger and I hadn't actually discussed labels, beyond being in a relationship.

"Boyfriend?" he asked.

"Is that what you are?"

"I'm a lot of things, but that descriptor seems to work well. For now."

"So, I'm not sure which one I should talk to first."

"I'm sure it will be different based on different situations, Babe. I know I'm going to have to learn how to listen as both people, and not approach everything like I did before. We can learn together. For now, why don't you just tell me what's going on, and both Rangers will listen. Then we can decide who you want to hear an answer from first."

"I love a man with a plan," I said. "Let's go home."

I cleaned my gun and put the extra ammo away while Ranger swept up the shells. We took the elevator to the 7th floor and I noticed a piece of Key Lime Pie on a small plate. I sat at the counter and dug in. Ranger grabbed 2 bottles of water from the fridge and sat beside me.

"Cards on the table: I heard about Pino's," he said. "I had Hector pulled the security footage. The video didn't have sound, but I have to say, I was pretty damn proud to see you handle him."

"Not much else to say. He doesn't seem to be paying attention that we're done. He thought I was living with my parents. I told him I wasn't staying there, but I didn't tell him I was living with you. It didn't seem like the best idea at the time."

"You're probably right. Did you want to hide it?" he asked. He didn't look hurt or pissed; he was genuinely offering. We moved off the barstools and into the living room, sitting on opposite ends of the couch.

"No!" I said. "I was just hoping it could kind of naturally come out."

"Then we'll just let it naturally take its course," he said. "But that can't be all that's bothering you."

I explained the situation with Vinnie at the Bond's Office. I could feel Ranger tensing up, so I closed the distance between us and pressed the side of my body into his. He brought his arm around my shoulders automatically.

"So, this is where you weren't sure if you should talk to the CEO of Rangeman or the guy who's going to fuck you 'til you faint tonight, correct?" My eyes shot to his. Playful Ranger was here.

"Correct," I said, pretending I hadn't just trashed the panties I was wearing.

"Well, Boss Ranger says this seems sketchy. Definitely something you should look into, I'm glad you told Vinnie to send you the emails. Boss Ranger also says the job situation isn't a big deal. Tank added you as an Action Item on the Core Team agenda last week, and when your Contract was up, we voted to not extend your Contractor status, but to ask you to come on as a Full-Time Rangeman employee. I can't imagine any of them wouldn't agree to accelerating that to now. We've all hoped you've quite Vinnie for a while."

I took a breath. This all seemed so easy. "And what about Boyfriend Ranger? What does he say?"

"He says that next time you should hit Morelli harder. He's sorry that Vinnie fucked you over. He loves living with you and is tempted to take out an ad in the Trenton Times to tell the whole world we're together. He thinks you should talk to your very understanding boss about upping your position to full time." He smiled.

"Thanks," I said. "I guess I just needed to talk to you."

"Babe, you're absolutely right that we'll have to have boundaries between work and home. I don't have all the answers, so we'll have to just take each situation as it comes. I'm sure I'll fuck up and not always get it right, but I swear that I'll open up to you and keep trying as long as you'll let me."

"And I swear that I won't run when it gets difficult."

We sat in silence for a minute, both lost in thought at the declarations we made.

"I may develop a complex having to handle multiple personalities," Ranger said, his lips in my hair. I pressed my nose into his neck, inhaling the lovely smell of Bulgari. He picked me up and carried me toward the bedroom.

"Don't tell your boyfriend, but you're about to sleep with your boss," he said seductively, setting me on my feet. He took a seat on the bed and stared at me with hooded eyes.

"Strip, Plum" he said.

Oh. Hell. Yes.