Year One - Chapter 21

—Concentrate.

—That's what I'm doing!

Several memories kept appearing in my mind; my first day at Hogwarts, how nervous I felt that day at Malfoy Manor. I had managed to improve a little since my father started teaching me Occlumency, but I felt I had hit a wall and he always ended up seeing all my memories. I could manage to keep him out for a couple of minutes but it never mattered how much I tried, he always saw at least one memory.

—Don't you prefer to sit with me? —She said that in an extremely sweet tone, but when she looked at me her face changed and looked like she had step on Hippogriff dung.

—Ahm, no, thank you. —He looked like he was kind of uncomfortable and this situation wasn't that pleasant either, so I just decided to see the match; my dad had given Hufflepuff a penalty for some reason, Harry was still looking for the Snitch.— I promised Eileen we would watch the match together.

I turned my head to see him, with a raised eyebrow and a smirk, he never promised me that, does he feel that uncomfortable being with her? He noticed my look and smiled at me, hoping that I would follow with his lie. In the meantime, my father had given Hufflepuff another penalty; I guess he wasn't lying when he said he wasn't going to let Gryffindor win.

—Dad, I'm really tired… Can't we do this some other day?

—Eileen, it is really important that you learn how to block your mind, to know how to stay calm and don't let people read you like an open book.

—But…

—Empty your mind. Don't think about anything. Legilimens!

—Are you completely sure, Filch? Do I have to remind you that it is my daughter you are accusing of leaving the castle?

—I'm sorry, Professor Snape, but no one knows where she is.

—Well, then what are you two waiting for? Professor Snape, could you please help open this passage?

That was our signal to run out of there, I ran like I had never done before, and it was even more difficult because the pants were in the way and it's really uncomfortable. It was very likely that they could hear our shoes hitting the ground, but that didn't matter to me, I just wanted to get out of the tunnel and get to the castle in another way.

—What do we do now? —I almost yelled at the boys, but I was nervous, I was scared.

—It appears someone wasn't in the bathroom that day as you as told me.

—Dad, I…

—Silence.

I was afraid of looking him in the eyes, so I stared at my shoes. I can't believe I let him see that memory! Everything was going great, I had managed to keep him out of any memory I really didn't want him to see, but now I was too tired to avoid it.

—You lied to me. Several times.

—Dad-

—Didn't I tell you to stay quiet? You left the castle! And you lied to my face! —He didn't say anything for a while, I wasn't sure if I should keep looking at my shoes, turn to see him or just try to run out of here.— You will be in detention for the rest of the term and I do not want to see you close to any of the Weasleys. Especially the twins.

—WHAT!? Dad, that's not fair!

—Not fair!? —I turned to see him and he was trying to calm down, he smirked and as soon he saw me I couldn't help to look back to the floor.— Eileen, life isn't fair, and even less when you get out of the castle when you know you shouldn't! You won't speak to any of them again, every Friday for the rest of the term you will come here to have your detention and you also won't go with the Malfoy's during the Easter Holiday. You will have to explain to Narcissa in a letter the great stupidity you did and why you are not going.

I pulled my legs up to my chest and wrapped my arms around my knees, I started crying like I hadn't done in a long time. I heard someone walking and then the sound of a door opening and closing with extreme force. I raised my head and with my hands, I wiped my tears

After a couple of minutes, I got up and left his office, closing the door with extreme force as well that I think everyone in the dungeons heard it. I can't believe I will be in detention for the rest of the year… I can't believe he prohibits me from talking to Fred and George!

I didn't make sense that he got mad over that, it happened months ago and nothing bad happened! And he even told me he had his suspicions that it was us, why he didn't do something back then? Agh, I hate him so much!

Without knowing, my legs took me to the owlery, I decided to take advantage of the fact that I was already here so I pulled a piece of parchment and a quill, I looked for a step that wasn't completely covered in owl droppings, with my foot I moved the rest of a dead rat lying there and sat down to write.

Dear Aunt Cissy,

It looks like the starts hate me and they are making every possible thing so that I cannot go visit you. My father just told me I can't go to the Manor over the Easter Holidays, truth be told, it really was my fault but I just think he is overreacting as always.

On Hallowe'en, I got out of Hogwarts with a couple of friends during the hour of the first class and we went to Hogsmeade, yes, I know I shouldn't have done it but honestly, what was the worst thing that could've happened? To spend all my money on sweets? The village is completely safe and we only went to Honeydukes.

Anyway, my dad found out about that today (even though he told me he had his suspicious so, why did he get mad now?) and told me that I will be in detention the rest of the term, I can't go visit you and he also forbade me from speaking with my friends! Could you or Uncle Lucius please talk to him and let him know he is overreacting?

Loves you,

Eileen Snape.

PD: I'm sorry for 'borrowing' Draco's owl.

I folded the letter and looked for Draco's owl, although it wasn't hard to find it; it was the biggest of all and the most beautiful.

—Hey, Anguis. —I started to stroke his feathers and let him remember me before I tried to give him the letter.— I'm sorry I have to bother you when I know you go every day to the Malfoy Manor and come back here. —I smiled when I heard Anguis hoot as if trying to confirm what I was saying.— But I really need you to take this to Aunt Cissy, can you do it?

I moved my hands closer to his leg and after looking at me for a couple of seconds, just turned his head and looked to the trees, so I tied the letter to his leg.

—There, feel free to rest when you get there. I'm not in a hurry to get a response.

After I said that it started flying and I looked at him until he disappeared in all of the trees, I turned around and got scared when I saw someone in the entrance to the owlery.

—Merlin, Roger! —He started laughing at my reaction.— Why did you do that?

—I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you, but I wasn't sure I wanted to interrupt such a beautiful moment with your owl.

I walked up to him and hit him slightly in his arm.

—Prat. I wasn't having any beautiful moment with Anguis.

—Anguis? —He started laughing again.— The name of the owl is snake?

—Stop laughing, Roger! —I hit him again slightly in his arm, but I was chuckling as well, Anguis was really a dumb name for an owl.— Besides, I didn't name him, it was my cousin.

—Are you excited for the Easter Holidays? —He pulled a letter from a pocket of his robe and walked up to one of the school owls.— I'm staying here in the castle, you?

—Well, I was excited, I was supposed to go stay with my Aunt and Uncle, but my dad is mad at me and now I have to stay here.

—Really? Why?

—I may or may not have gone to Hogsmeade without him knowing on Hallowe'en. And he may or may not have found out.

I was biting my lower lip while I was watching his reactions and waited for him to tell me something; his eyebrows were so high up that they seemed to disappear in his hair and his mouth was slightly opened. I sat back down in the same step I sat earlier and after a couple of seconds he sat down next to me.

—You're pulling my leg, right?

—Nope, I really went to Hogsmeade. Twice, actually, but don't tell that to my dad, he thinks I only went once.

—But… How? Isn't the gate closed with several spells? Although, well, I wouldn't be surprised you knew how to take them down… —He chuckled and ran his right hand through his hair.— Tell me everything.

—Wow, I'm flattered you think I could take down the spells of the great Albus Dumbledore but actually, there are several passageways that take you to Hogsmeade, there's one that leaves you close to the station.

—That's… Amazing.

—Yeah, maybe, but now I'll have to stay here during the holiday and also will be in detention for the rest of the term…

Roger put his hand on my shoulder and squeeze it a little bit, I turned to see him and he had a little smile on his face so I smiled too. I looked at his eyes, I never really payed attention to them so I thought they were black, but he actually has hazel eyes… Why is his face getting closer? Is he getting closer? Merlin, why is he getting closer!?

I closed my eyes and felt something soft and warm over my lips, oh great Salazar, those are Roger's lips! Roger's kissing me! What do I do? How do you kiss someone?

I raised my arms, thinking I should put them somewhere, (on his arms? His hands?) but I had absolutely no idea what to do, so I put them back over my knees.

After a couple of seconds, Roger backed up and we were both smiling like idiots.

—I'm sorry, Eileen, I—

—No, it's… It's okay. —I got closer to him and kissed him again quickly in the lips. Is this what I'm supposed to do? I got up and shook my robe, I couldn't stop feeling I had owl droppings everywhere.— Well, uhm. I-I'll see you at dinner.

Dear Eileen,

I was surprised to read your letter and know you are not coming again, I know I should be angry with you for doing something so foolish like that, but if I'm being honest, Lucius and I laughed for a while. Don't think we were laughing at you, darling, but we laughed over the fact that you are so much like your mother. She also got out of Hogwarts to go to Hogsmeade with us in her first year, but I'll tell you the details another day.

Try no to get into more trouble, I really would like to talk with you over the summer holidays and know how your first year went. I will also send a letter to your father, it does seems a little unfair what he did, but just remember that he only wants what is best for you and wants you to be safe and happy. Just like us.

Narcissa Malfoy.