It was their day off the next day, and that meant after braving through a nasty night of practically crying himself to sleep that Genesis sat by Sephiroth and Angeal in the cafetorium. Instead of ordering what he called meager food that the lunch ladies and gentlemen created, he had a Banora White in his hand, eating silently as Angeal and Sephiroth pointed at their schoolbooks with pens.

Their lunch trays to the side with a standard set of ShinRa rations which was eggs, sausage and toast in the morning, then mashed potatoes, gravy and garlic bread for lunch. Currently it was the latter—well, partial as he could only find most contents in Sephiroth's tray.

Angeal gratefully ate each meal that was given his way, earning a roll of Genesis' eyes every time he mentioned his frugality. It was alright to be grateful, Genesis too, was thankful for every morsel he has and gets, but not when it was practically torture for the stomach, something that should never be consumed for the love of eternity.

The goddess herself would spit upon this trash.

"And if we apply this formula here, it could solve the problem." Angeal instructed as Sephiroth made a circle on the paper.

"But it would work better if we shifted this to the left. This matter presses harder and requires to be looked into." Sephiroth pointed out, glancing at the raven-haired boy with a raised silver brow. Genesis glanced at their books as he took another bite of the purplish fruit.

He offered the two the same fruit—and that happened to be the only things they ate. Apparently, they had no time for breakfast beforehand. It wrought shame down the auburn boy. They were this busy trying to finish their classwork before they lost more hours to lectures that could bore them to death?

Genesis surprisingly had his done while he was working. That was probably why he fell asleep in the studio. It was a little too simple for his liking, too easy to flick formulas and methods to complete simple problems—Sephiroth and Angeal however, kept it interesting by flanking newer ways to solve it. They applied many battle tactics to things such as mathematics, or even mathematics into their strategy classes, and each time, he was caught amazed by how many ways they found.

And the boy didn't hate math, he hated simple problems.

How his heart was at such peace just gazing at the two as they communicated to one another. There was nothing in the world—the entire Planet that was better than watching two friends get along so well. It was an effort to have Angeal comfortable with him—the rich boy of Banora, the one who people kept a safe distance from. It was even more of work to invite Sephiroth into their little twin root. The two were almost tied to the hip close, no one could weave their way into their friendship as they allowed Sephiroth.

He had absolutely no regrets in having the silver teen be a part of their lives. He was by no means a burden or a prized possession that was handed to them with an iron fist, he was another child just as they were and now, he was an adult, ready to face the world in his intrinsic manner. Not by the words of ShinRa, but his own.

And if Sephiroth did not want to enlist, Genesis and Angeal were sure to follow him. Despite telling Cloud that they were prepared to be heroes, he gave those little words some thought. Outside this hellish training and building character, Genesis already had a career in place. It'll take Angeal and Sephiroth a little while before they catch up, with the raven boy probably opening a family garden shop, and Sephiroth in a library or a gymnasium.

He bellowed a sigh, just so content to watch them pick at their work, veiling their inability to commence small talk with stimulating their minds.

These two are going to keep going at it, aren't they?

They must've mistaken his sigh of appreciation as a bored breath that waited to be included in their boring work, judging by the way Angeal and Sephiroth's eyes landed on him, so concentrated with guilt and concern.

"Genesis." He jumped in his seat when the two of them called him, both having a strong, authoritative tone as if they caught him dazed, "wouldn't you find this method better?"

And truly, he wasn't on their wavelength at this moment, finding his eyes constantly shifting somewhere else. It was as if he was transported from one world to another, another reality as if he was daydreaming of how they were at peace, at harmony with one another. Perhaps it was their tone he disdained in this moment where it should've been a dual projection of simplicity, of a small calm, soft and supple like his apple. With the way they addressed him, it was all of a sudden the same as a superior General calling out on a poorly performing cadet.

Those kind eyes were not as tender and caring anymore. Angeal's deep blues were studying him, scrutinizing him as if he was a clone or something, and Sephiroth… Why was it here that he imagined Sephiroth glaring at him as if he was something worth rotting—or watching as Angeal pointed the Buster Sword at him, and himself smirking like a naughty cat at empty threats?

Their gazes were tearing him apart, penetrating his inner, self-depreciative soul.

He hid the fear that was gnawing in his guts, opting for an answer that he hoped would connect, at the very least.

"Why not move X to the right? It's that 'suppose Y is = 0' algebra thing, no?"

Angeal gave him a smile and it was not one of happiness. Sephiroth's slit green eyes darted to him, that bright swirl of aquamarine and silver so full contrasted greatly with the dim, hollow green his dream showed.

'You will rot.'

As if punched in the gut,, nausea began building up inside of him, ordering him to spill all he had consumed despite the deliciousness of his apple. He had to bite it down with a large breath to keep himself from doing so. Now was not the time to be zoning out.

"Well Gen.. this isn't algebra. This is us playing around The Art of War's workbook." Angeal elaborated with that pitied smile, so wry to the point that Genesis could feel that the younger boy regretted involving him. When did they switch topics? He could've sworn they were doing mathematics a moment ago.

"Did you attain enough sleep, Genesis? Your reaction time has halved, not to mention.. you're radiating a nervous energy." Sephiroth surveyed, eyes screaming levels of concern for him as his voice lowered. Unneeded worry.

"Yeah," oh Goddess, do not retch in front of them. "Just got a.. a.."

"What is it? A stomach-ache? A fever? Tell us." Angeal shifted a little closer, running a warm hand along his forehead, "tell us so we could help."

Him stuttering was enough embarrassment he earnt this day. He had to cover up those nightmarish sights plaguing him currently.

"I've been asked to go on a date." He blurted out just like that. And boy, how Angeal's eyes widened like saucer plates, and Sephiroth.. Sephiroth was hilarious—he was trying to piece together something completely different. He seemed to so lost, it threw Genesis' nerves away in the need to laugh loudly.

"How could someone ask you to either sit or stand on a fruit so small..?" That question had the two bursting out into laughs, and Sephiroth frowned.

"Gen, you're this shaken up because you're going out with Cloud?" Angeal asked in between laughs, and Genesis had Sephiroth's query on a non-stop replay, trying his best to imagine what gears were running through that strange mind of his to come up with something as peculiar as that. "I thought you saw Sephiroth murder you or something!"

Oh, how his honourable raven-haired friend had no idea…

"Angeal, there's a potential that Cloud and I would…" he shook off the laughs in favour of answering with as much newborn fear that crept up his slender body, "would…"

"Why would Strife—"

"A date is a romantic outing, Seph!" he couldn't break into more chuckles at the adorable assumption of his friend who had absolutely no idea what he was talking about.

"A romantic outing…" Sephiroth furrowed his brows again, glaring straight at him. That stare had Genesis want to shrink and hide on Angeal's shoulder. "Genesis, Strife is your—our friend, we are with him almost every day.. why is this different?"

He lifted a hand to his face, "I.. it is intimate."

Angeal spoke up for him, "you see Seph, when it is a group hangout, you are not thinking of spending eternity with them. It's more of a time you cherish spent but will be alright when they find their soulmate and move on."

"But I want to spend eternity with…" Sephiroth trailed on, frown deepening as if he thought they will stop being friends.

"You don't want to kiss me, though." The raven friend corrected, bringing up a finger, and Genesis wished he was assuming when he caught something very odd in those glimmering eyes. "Our eternity is like.. doing these activities, playing games, uhh.. occasional hugs when a friend needs it, not sleeping on the same bed.. without clothes."

The silver haired male merely blinked, before turning to a grimace at the bit that had the slightly older boy's cheeks flush.

"Gen, Cloud and Zack are coming, I think you should explain the rest to Sephiroth while I keep them away." The boy stood up before Genesis could properly ask, "wait, why?"

"I think you'll combust if you and Cloud discuss this further."

With that, he left him with a confused Sephiroth.

Damned traitor.

Sephiroth's eyes blinked in curiosity and Genesis heaved a deep sigh. This boy was the last person he wanted to explain this to.

"Genesis.."

"Don't ask." He rubbed his temples, wondering why the Goddess condemned him so. What did he do in his past—

Better yet.. why did life hate him so? First, the stupid magic growth, then the ShinRa's tiresome Academy ways, now the nightmares that ate at him.

Green eyes glaring at him so intensely and so heartlessly—the eyes of a madman.

"If I could understand why, I would cease." Was that a plead? Genesis smacked himself for rendering Sephiroth into this. "I want to know what this is, and what effect it would have upon us."

Bright cerulean widened as it met emerald eyes. Did he fear the end of their friendship because he was going out with Cloud?

"Oh Seph.." he ran a hand around that sharp face, so smooth and soft yet strong. "It won't affect us in the way you think."

"What do you mean?" how little he truly sounded, so distant, so small as if he was so close to breaking.

"We will still be friends.. you, Angeal, me, the puppy.. Cloud." If he wasn't so particular on intimacy, he could've given those cheeks of his silver friend a caress with his lips. "I love you too much to leave."

"Love..?" Genesis missed the way Sephiroth quite so leaned to his touch, melting into it. "How different is it? Your love to us, and this romantic outing with Strife..?"

"Like 'Geal put it, if Cloud and I become a thing, we'd be kissing each other, bound to each other, sleeping in the same bed, doing..." giving themselves to each other. Genesis never imagined he would ever, it was too much to mull over. At the same time, if Cloud wanted it.. he didn't mind. The boy was one of the reasons he felt so giddy these days, so.. strangely virginal.

It did make sense as he was still…

"But Gen.. Strife quite so lives with Fair. How do we know.. they're not sleeping in the same bed the way Angeal put it?"

Genesis' eyes widened. Did Sephiroth know he had a very compelling point? Something Genesis did not consider at all? Was he just a trial for Cloud? Something he wanted to test the waters with so that he could do the same or better for Zack?

Cloud was.. using him?

"I'll see.. today, if that is the case." His heart was sinking deep, so fast like a freight train. Did Sephiroth know that? Could he ever understand the pain he was falling into?

"What would you do? Would you still be his friend?"

"I.. don't know." He trembled. Truly, now he did have no answer for the silver friend. "But as happiness grows, so does guilt. Of not fulfilling the oath to his friends."

He earned a furrow of his brows, not out of anger, just distant.

"If you won't be his friend.. should we follow?" and Genesis had to resist a little coo. That was so cute of Sephiroth to think he had to break the friendship he forged with Cloud just because Genesis couldn't share it after their date. Did he not care for what he felt?

He shook his head.

"I won't ask you to."

And he met jade of understanding. He supposed Sephiroth would only cherish those who spent more than a year with him as he and Angeal had— Cloud and Zack were as good as passerby if they hurt his friends. Genesis disdained his surprise at the unspoken sentiment. Of course, Sephiroth would protect who he cared for. That was what he and Angeal taught him over the course of his Academy years.

For him to take it to his heart and secure it like a child holding their favourite toy had Genesis biting his lip, regretting his reckless choice of changing his potential friendship with the cute Cloud.

He was going to lose him tonight.

"I would want to follow your choice, Gen. I do not want to be friends with someone who is not your friend." By the goddess, Sephiroth was so cute..

"For the price of my pride.. flight is no more for my wing has shattered." He meant well, he meant the best for him. It didn't simmer the guilt welled so persistent in Genesis' gut. The auburn boy gave him a tight smile. "Thank you, Seph, and I'm sorry."

He should've said no. No… he should never have insinuated that he was open for a romantic relationship, oh poor Cloud. Another fool to his allure.

"Genesis.." Sephiroth ended as soon as he began, lips parting before pressing together in an uncertain frown. Genesis raised his head with a small nod to have him continue, but whatever the boy wanted to say went unspoken with a shake of his head, silver hair swishing slow by the action.

Sometimes, Genesis wondered if he was in love with two of his best friends. How easy it would've been.. just telling these two people who meant his world that he adored them, that they were his as he was theirs. He was wishful thinking. Of course, Sephiroth and Angeal only gazed upon him as a friend, as someone to cherish. They would never be close to having their lips upon him, whisper sweet nothings to him and remind him how necessary he was to them.

I loathe who I have become.

What had happened.. just a moment ago, they were laughing so hard their stomachs hurt. Now… it just felt as though Genesis has broken a chasm between his four friends with his foolishness. The fissure was growing too deep under his feet, clawing at him, attempting to rip into his flesh and drag him down—to reap what he had sewn.

"I should get ready soon.." he mumbled to himself, finding those bright green still bearing into his wordlessly.

"Would you like me to give you some alone time?"

He couldn't smile and shake his head in this current moment like he should've. To lie now was to wish for Masamune to cut into his neck and have him bleed drop by drop in the slowest pace possible. That, he didn't want. Genesis may have had death on the back of his mind almost every minute of the day, but he did not want to die pointlessly.

Or early, in that manner.

"No.. could you stay with me?"

That little smile that followed the slight nod shed some light upon him. At least, if he had to face the end, it would be with a smile.

Perhaps, he was a little too much of a cryptic person. Or he was just stupid.

Within the stress that was piling inside of Genesis these weeks of scheduling and scheduling appointments, he had forgotten that simply laying in a bathtub with running warm water and deep bubbles could be so… cathartic. To his bewilderment, it was Sephiroth's suggestion to add the bubble formula within the bath, claiming that Genesis once told him that it was fun to play with.

Being Head of the Drama Club, unofficial speaker for their group of five, Leader of a rather successful band, attending class and training for the enlistment… he has severely overestimated his capabilities. It was a lot of work to squish into a month's time—knowing it wasn't him alone but managing more than 20 people. His group were five, his band were more than 10 if including the sound crew, the choreographers, the directors, producers, etctctc, the club of his consisting of about 14 members (and were still recruiting at that!).
In short, that's a lot of people to work around!

Too many people. While Genesis had the presence of a peacock: beautiful, alluring and most certainly attractive, he hated the fact that he had to interact with others. Having them under his wing was one thing, it wasn't too difficult to make a good speech, say it once with a good pitch and watch as the members all scream in agreement, cry tears of joy or raise their hands in the air. Actually, having to be the sitting with them and commencing small talk was a nightmare for him.

He didn't care what they did in their daily lives. He had not a damn in his soul to know what their lovers did or what they ate in the morning just as long as they were willing to do their part. For them to do their job is all he asked of them. It was supposed to be a mutual agreement that he shares no information about him as they won't to him.

Of course… it is easier said than done. He still had many who had their ShinRa worthy sob-story that he had to listen to and pass a sympathy tissue to. A couple of them were worth the listening though, he had to nod in reluctance. One of his clubmates had troubles with her lover—warranting a punch to the face by Genesis as the poor girl pleaded for some way to avoid harm.

Yes, he was a silly willy who tried protecting each member. When they were in a pinch, he offered to assist them any which way possible, they just needed to page him. A something he learnt from Angeal.

Anyroad, Genesis let himself have the moment to just bask in the warmth of the bubble bath. He earnt himself the right to rest for the last time in his life, he might as well take it before it flies off. He ushered Sephiroth to stay with Angeal and Zack while he and Cloud went out—the reason why the silver teen wasn't around.

He had enough time to arrange a cab for he and the blond. He didn't think of giving the boy a gift, not really knowing what he would like or if it would be awkward since it was their first "date", as he labelled it. The play was within a couple of hours, giving him enough time to shoot messages to his clubmates and bandmates on his work-phone, that he planned to do after getting his wrinkled self out of the bath.

Whoops, he stayed in there for too long, it seemed.

Genesis didn't bother with blow-drying his hair, letting his towel do most the work before shifting it to the side and away from his eye it veiled. He figured everyone thinks of him as a fashionable one, he might as well dress a little like one who knew their beauty—no matter how much he disagreed with it.

It was obvious that there were prettier people than he, ones with better figures, with cuter smiles, eyes that were not so damn light and almost invisible, skin not so pasty as his, someone who did not have bursts of fire or other magic emitting from his body like it's a second nature. Sure, he was not bad looking, just not the best there was.

It was easy to put on a mask and act like he was, though.

All he needed to do was put on a layer or two and boom, he was presentable. Donning black jeans, he had a long-sleeved grey netted shirt under his maroon turtleneck, finding himself too used to wearing layers underneath his outerwear for years and years, it was returning to him in a full swing. Heck, under his jeans were the long socks he used to have a habit of wearing before he became fifteen.

When the bruising on his skin had ceased for good.

Sure, training and workouts did cause wear and tear, cuts and scratches, bruises and dents upon his currently unblemished skin, this time were by accident and not by a harsh hand or a stick. It wasn't punishment as it was when he covered them up.

Tonight, those scars that he thought were fresh off his body littered him once again. He couldn't think of revealing a part of his body without the shame of something ugly to pick on, a scab to nip at, something Cloud could scoff or grimace at. He didn't want to disappoint him.

The sleeves of the maroon turtleneck were long and wide, prone to slipping and Genesis was so ready to run Rapier through the mirror he was gazing at with hollow cerulean eyes and smash it to pieces. He opted not to, realizing that the shards would laugh at him, still staring with its cruel reflective glass and displaying to him how pathetic he truly was.

Genesis Rhapsodos was a f—king joke.

He wasn't even a Rhapsodos, to add salt to that wound! He was a freaking nobody within this world full.. somebodies. Cloud was a Strife, but even so, that was someone important. More than someone who had no name to his calling—just some thing that was supposedly labelled "G".

A cell-born baby.

Hell, even Sephiroth had parents. Cruel they were to raise him in a laboratory.. at least they loved him. At the very least, he was born out of the passion of their jobs, and Sephiroth was growing into a handsome young man, settled and strong—sure, a little silly, no hair off his silver head.

He belonged. Angeal belonged. Even Zack the puppy, Cloud.. Genesis didn't.

Not wanting to break down a second time in this week, he sunk to his knees and drew in deep breaths, drawing his eyes away from the reflective glass glaring down at him. That was all he was, just some being that deserved to be spat upon, viewed as a knave, a slave to the powerful.

What was the use of being good at Materia when everyone else could with the proper training? He was going to become obsolete if Angeal or Sephiroth matched his caliber, if Cloud learnt how to spread his wings. He wanted him to reach his full potential, still wanted to assist him as much as he could to get there.
It was rather strange.

He had a lingering thought that he would be envious of what they had, that he would resist their growth in order for himself to be higher. He expected himself to pull back and try and strive too high and crash horribly. It was a feeling as if he was supposed to do all that, but he didn't want to.

The thought of his four friends soaring higher while he watched from below brought a smile to his face. It was alright if they kept getting better and better, if they improved themselves by his hand. He didn't mind being below them as long as he wouldn't be left back forgotten.

Perhaps, that was why he was often left in charge of the squadron they made. While Angeal was the voice of reason, he was the one who held their hands and forced him up their seats, push them to step into a new horizon.

And yet…

.

The thought of them turning around to take care of him afterwards.. didn't seem all that bad.

Lifting himself from the floor, he stepped out of the pale bathroom, out of that compact place of near white walls and tiles. Fastening his silver earring on his ear, he glanced at it as it shone even in the dark, so radiant as his friend Angeal, so moon kissed as Sephiroth's hair.

Hovering to his night table, he pulled upon the drawers to check a small treasure-chest the size of both his palms put together and flicked open the knob. He almost snickered at the number of rings of silver, small bands of titanium and little intricate pieces of obsidian, onyx and rubies rested inside. Naturally he went for the titanium bands or the obsidian jewelry for his PVs, today was a special day, so he chose the companion set of ruby rings.

He thought of giving one pair to Cloud before he finally giggled. Cloud didn't seem like the kind who would adorn himself with jewelry, pretty that he was. He didn't even need them, being so adorable and child-like.

Glancing at the clock and slightly widening his eyes that he still had an hour till he met up with the young blond, he shook his head in disbelief. He couldn't have been sulking for only ten minutes, that had to be ten hours!

He slung a sleeveless black vest that ran down to touch his knees, and a random necklace that hung too low he twirled it twice before it settled on his chest. He wasn't trying to dress in a feminine manner nor to impress, little trinkets seemed to help him be content with his image. It accentuated his softer edges, his prettiness that his fan club made him smile about.

He decided not to top it off with his knee-high leather boots, going for ones that brushed an inch over his ankles, and brown at that. He was not going for a PV, he was not going out to train. No.. he was going to have a relaxing time watching his favourite book come alive.

His uniform was too boring for the job, and his leathers were a little too reminiscent of his job—of Gackt. He wanted something that accentuated Genesis, the one behind all those faces. Cloud was not dating Gackt, he was dating the lowly human under that demon king he pretends to be.

He hoped it was enough.