S-2_C-21: The Aftermath

My irregular breathing thundered in my ears—suddenly the only sound in my world.

I reached out for anything to hold onto as I hurtled through empty space. I spun out of control, kicking and trying desperately to stabilize myself. Without EVA thrusters, it was virtually impossible. My field of view whirled between the planet's green surface and a canvas of stars. Supremacy was a white dot on the violent horizon.

A large shard of the transport's hull flew by me, causing my heart to stop in fear. I looked back at the transport; the debris had already spread into an unrecognizable mess. Frozen bodies of Stormtroopers, either intact or in pieces, floated among the wreckage. I spun farther and farther away from it by the second.

Realizing that my right side throbbed with pain, I looked down to see that my armor was melted and charred. I pressed the com button on my cracked communicator to no avail. According to the heads-up display, my suit's environmental controls were stable and my oxygen tank was half full. How long will that last?

All the while, inertia continued to take its course and pull me farther out into space. The debris had become so far away that I could barely see it, and Supremacy was nowhere to be seen.

No one's going to find me out here.

Red words then appeared before my eyes. They read: "Oxygen level—5%"

My stomach dropped in terror. I felt myself start to hyperventilate. My entire life—all my regrets and all my mistakes—began to reel through my mind.

I haven't seen my father in years.

My pain faded away, replaced by chilly numbness.

I've never told Kylo that I love him.

The edges of my vision began to narrow as whiteness flashed into view. I gasped in my final breaths of oxygen, and then darkness overtook my view.

...

When I awoke, I blinked at the dark, unfamiliar ceiling above me. Why am I not in my room? As the fog of sleep cleared, I realized I was in an infirmary of some sort. There were medical devices on the wall above me, as well as bags of fluids hanging from a pole. With a start, I realized there was someone sitting beside my gurney.

He looked every part a stern military man. Strange...the fleet doesn't have a military. His red hair was neatly combed away from his face, and his icy, green eyes pierced into mine. It was difficult to tell whether he was friendly or not.

"You're awake," he said with a small frown.

"Who are you?" I asked.

His lips parted in surprise before he schooled his expression. "Right...," he murmured. "The medical officer said you may suffer from temporary amnesia." The man cleared his throat, revealing a hint of awkwardness. "I am General Armitage Hux, your...peer."

Confusion swept through me. He looked way too young to be a general of anything. Feeling a spasm in my hand, I glanced down to see a small medical droid working at the deeply damaged skin of my left arm. A feeling of nausea swept over me, and I ripped my eyes away. My heart raced out of control.

"What happened to me?" I choked out. I tried to close my left fist, but my entire arm was completely numb. Thank the stars for that.

"You were a passenger on a transport that suffered an attack." Armitage pulled his eyes away from the busy droid to watch my face. "The burns you sustained from the explosion melted your undersuit to your skin. It had to be surgically extracted from your arm. They also had to realign some of the bones in your leg." No doubt seeing the horror on my face, he added, "Unfortunately."

I swallowed slowly, trying to rationalize why anyone would attack us. Wetting my lips, I asked, "Where is Ambassador Caltrel?"

Armitage frowned at the question.

I began to panic. "Where is my father? Is he...is he—"

"Caltrel," he interrupted, "calm down." His stern tone comforted me somehow, and his pinched face suddenly appeared more familiar. "We're aboard the Supremacy, the flagship of the First Order. You are a high-ranking operative in the service of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren. As am I."

I strained to look around the room. The dark, reflective walls suddenly became familiar, as well as the constant rumble of Supremacy's engines. "Hux," I choked out. "Oh, gods..." I let my head fall back against the pillow, wincing at the painful memories flooding back in.

The mission. The transport.

"Just...breathe," Hux mumbled.

I let a few moments slip by as I came to grips with the fact that I was alive. "Where is he?" were the next words out of my mouth.

"Ren is planetside. He's investigating the attack and should return thereafter."

"Okay," I breathed out, immensely relieved. Cracking an eye open, I noticed the quizzical look on Hux's face. In my intensely vulnerable state, the look made me flush in embarrassment.

"Do you remember the current year?"

"Of course," I rasped. "34 ABY. Nearly 35."

"My apologies," Hux said incredulously. "Just moments ago you were parsecs away."

I sighed tightly and let my eyes fall. On my left arm, the droid was depositing some kind of liquid metal where my skin should have been. My leg was tightly bandaged and completely numb, unknowably disfigured. I looked away, clenching my teeth in disgust.

"How did they find me out there, Hux?"

He was uncharacteristically at a loss for words, staring at the durasteel rails on the gurney. "Hux," I repeated. He looked at me with an odd intensity that I soon recognized as guilt.

"Caltrel, I have a confession to make."

I sobered at his grave tone, trying my best to look attentive as I laid there wounded and disheveled.

"Several months ago, you received a vaccine. You were told you needed it for a mission to a distant planet."

I sifted through my memories of the many missions I had gone on in the past several months. "Right," I said, recalling the very injection.

"It wasn't a vaccine," Hux said slowly, holding my gaze, "it was a tracker."

My brow furrowed.

"Several million, actually," he went on. "In your bloodstream."

"Why?" I asked. Not only was it against many laws on many planets, but it was also a huge invasion of privacy. If Hux had been any less remorseful, I would have been angry.

"Think about it," Hux nearly whispered, narrowing his eyes. "Lucia Caltrel, an identified traitor and dissenter, suddenly back in the First Order's good graces. I didn't trust you."

I pursed my lips at the idea. "I understand not trusting me," I granted. "But why not trust Ren?"

Hux seemed to mull the question over. "Just a philosophy of mine: 'trust no one,'" he said. "Anyway..." His eyes traveled between mine briefly, and for a moment I believed that he was glad I wasn't a human popsicle on my way to the Outer Rim. "Now you know."

I was thankful for the soft chime that sounded overhead, drawing our attention to one of the medical machines on the wall. A medbot activated itself nearby and hovered over to address the alarm. It began to adjust one of the bags of fluids hooked up to me.

"I must remind you to rest, my lady," the droid said, spinning its expressionless lenses towards me.

"I'm not tired," I told the droid with a sigh. Despite my statement, the lights overhead dimmed significantly.

"You may not feel tired at this time, but your brain needs to rest."

Hux had already stood with his arms folded. "He ordered me to stay with you until his return," he was saying as he turned away. "Shocking, I know," he added in a barely-there mutter.

I realized at that moment that, strangely, I owed him my life. "Thank you, Hux," I said.

He glanced at me with a nearly invisible smirk on his face. "Get some rest," he said in reply.

Getting rest proved to be very difficult. For the next several hours, I squirmed and fought to push myself to sleep. I worried about my injuries; I worried about Kylo. I thought of my father, my step-mother, and the life I had left behind without a second thought almost a year and a half ago. Reliving happy memories from the fleet helped to pull me away from my current worries.

An overnight trip to see my friend on a neighboring frigate. Making up constellations with my father on the observation deck. A midnight talk with my sister about boys.

Unexpectedly, sleep found me.

...

The next time I came to, more feeling had returned to my hand. I wiggled my fingers, feeling painful pricks in my fingertips as my sensation slowly returned. When I opened my eyes, the room was much darker than before—the night cycle had arrived.

I looked around the room for Hux. Someone had lowered the head of my bed, so it was difficult. In a dim corner, slumped unconscious in an uncomfortable chair, was Kylo Ren.

When I tried to say his name, my voice came out as a dry rasp. The sound of me clearing my throat startled him awake. He blinked at me in a slight daze before stumbling to his feet.

"Lucia," he whispered, coming to my side.

"Stars—it's good to see you," I said for lack of a better greeting. He laughed, a wonderful sound, and stooped to kiss my forehead. I reached for the back of his neck as he continued to plant kisses all over my face. His presence shone like a warm light in my mind's eye.

I've never told Kylo that I love him.

"I swear on my life," he said firmly as he pulled back to look at me, "you will never be in harm's way again. Never again, do you understand?"

I nodded, unconcerned with the words that were coming out of his mouth. "Kylo, I—"

"Da'far, that damned monster, is dead along with his co-conspirators. I'll never let anyone hurt you like that again." His voice trembled with emotion. "I swear it."

In total shock, I watched his glassy eyes waver with unshed tears. I had been injured on missions before, but certainly not to that extent. I felt familiar pinpricks in my own eyes.

"The com hub we destroyed wasn't even worth the effort. Nothing would be worth losing—" Kylo choked back a sob as he brushed the hair away from my face to place a hand on my cheek.

I pulled him down to place a kiss on his trembling lips. "Kylo, I'm okay. It's okay," I murmured. I held his forehead to mine as our tears subsided. It was frightening to think just how close I had come to dying and losing him forever. Had it not been for Hux...

"They said you will need more surgeries and months of rehabilitation." Pulling away, Kylo looked down at me with a cross expression. "You are not 'okay.'"

"I'm alive," I said, settling back against my pillow. "That's all that matters to me. Rehab will be...like a vacation."

Kylo smiled and placed one final kiss on my forehead. His tears had already vanished as if they hadn't been there in the first place. "Trust me, you are now on a permanent vacation. No more combat roles."

Deciding to dispute the statement at another time, I just laughed. The day's events flashed through my mind during the silence that followed. I squeezed Kylo's hand to pull his attention away from the medbot still working on my arm. "Have I ever told you that I love you?" I asked him.

His expression faltered as though I had taken him off guard. "Not in so many words, no."

I placed his hand on my chest, close to my heart. "Kylo Ren," I whispered, "I love you."

His pleased smile lit the room. "Lucia Caltrel," he said, lifting my hand to his lips, "I love you more than you will ever know."