I've met this girl by the name of Yuu….
An awkward, cringy night. Those were the first of his thoughts upon waking up in his sensei's bed. His cell phone alarm went off, indicating that school was to be attended. "My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark'' by Fall Out Boy was going to get deleted. Honestly, he really wanted to toss this phone into the lake. Especially since the entire student body had his contact information.
Dry saliva, glitter, lip gloss, and dry residue of Nemuri's juices were all over his face as he turned off his cell phone. He felt intoxicated. Actually, he wasn't sure if he was intoxicated, drugged, sedated, or everything in between. After literally kissing his sensei's ass, he couldn't recall much of last night.
Getting enough and picking off the residue of sticky mess, he tried pinpointing the nearest bathroom to shower. He hoped that his uniform was presentable enough for class. He didn't mind being late for Aizawa-sensei's homeroom, or at least that was going to be their mutual agreement. After last night's debacle involving Toga and pet-sitting, the validity of AIzawa-sensei's teaching to the masses should be questioned.
Yawning as he staggered into the bathroom, he wished that he didn't see what was written on his body upon turning on the lights. Graffiti writings of Kayama-sensei's ownership scrawled from the top of his head to the sole of his feet. Markings that indicate how many times consciously and unconsciously she had partake in forbidden fruit. Unsure if it came from a felt-tip pen or a permanent marking, he needed to clear off anything that the sun can shine.
Familiar with the buttons of a Japanese bathroom, he pressed the right buttons to prepare his shower. No need to necessarily take off any clothing or lack thereof, he stepped into the shower to wash away the impurities of yesterday.
"Knock, knock, Puddin'!" His face furrowed when hearing the sensei of the night poorly impersonate Harley Quinn as she entered the bathroom. Judging from her friendly demeanor and being freshly dressed for work, she looked very refreshed.
"Hey," he said flatly as he allowed the hot water to soothe his chest.
She giggled. "Pleasant, sweet Izuku. Pretending not to enjoy the revelry and festivities from last night." She slapped the tile. "Still feeling a bit touchy, sweetness? Don't be. This can be our little secret."
"Day one," he answered as he grabbed the bath gel. Oatmeal raisin, he thought as he began lathering.
"Aww, don't be that way. You act like this is a bad thing. Guys like Mineta and Hanta would love to be in your shoes," she giggled. "You don't know how many times I see dick lint from Mineta's desk every afternoon."
"I am not sure if I am disturbed by Mineta or the fact you are in search of it."
"I have a sadistic nature, Dekkun! After all, your misery turns me on."
"You make Kathy Bates proud."
Kayama-sensei walked forward to the shower stall. "Eggs and bacon are on the stove. A fresh squeezed pitcher of orange juice is on the mantle. Even made cinnamon rolls laced with a bit of creamy velvet within the swirl."
He should be infuriated by his own foolishness by allowing himself to be easily submitted to Kayama-sensei. Nevertheless, cinnamon rolls with laced velvet was appetizing.
"I wish I could stay and further educate you with the ways of love, but I am late for class," she said as she was leaving the bathroom. "Your clothes are on the couch and I got your backpack as well. And Izuku, please be at my class on time. If not, then I don't mind extending this love slave relationship." She began cackling. "Yet again, as much as you pumped into me last night, I won't be surprised if I am pregnant."
"Huh?"
"I'm kidding! Only kidding!" Not really! "Ta-ta, Izuku! Can't wait to begin our lovely week together."
Izuku proceeded to pound his head against the wall. I am weak, beta shounen! I am a weak, beta shounen! I am weak, beta shounen! I am a weak, beta shounen!
Another fifty 'I am a weak, beta shounens' later….
At least breakfast was pleasant to say the least. He had to make a prayer to God as he blessed this food as it wasn't laced with sedatives, fertility pills, or Sildenafil. While partaking on his breakfast, he decided to look at the newspaper to catch up on the latest.
Before taking a sip of his orange juice, he heard his cell phone ring.
It was Aizawa-sensei.
As he nearly choked on his cinnamon roll, he had hesitance to return his call. However, he did receive money for the interaction of pet-sitting Toga. However, he did exchange hands with a dirty gloved, clean handed teacher. Nevertheless, the fact he engaged in the act made him much as dirty as his sensei. He exhaled sharply before answering the phone.
"Hello," said Izuku.
"Morning, sport," replied Aizawa-sensei. "Pleasantly surprised that you have answered this morning."
"Well, I do have school to attend."
"Well, I didn't expect you to come. I felt that you would remain in your lucid, wet dreaming." It was met with a chuckle. The teen was amused. "Seriously, I came by your dorm this morning to come catch you with a thank-you breakfast, but Yamada-sensei said that you weren't home." A grin was produced. "Something caught your eye during a late night stroll?"
"No, sir. The trains were shut down and I had to crash at a manga cafe."
"I see, Midoriya. You do know that manga cafe is one of the top five spots to have rendezvous."
"Sir, is this even normal that we are speaking like this."
"I think our boundaries crossed after you fed our pet with much needed milk." He began to chuckle. "Emi, here, complimented on its texture. You are definitely on our books for breeding in the next…."
"Sensei! Are we here to discuss my virility or you something important to discuss."
Aizawa-sensei whistled. "Look who's balls began to descend." He jested once more. "I am kidding, Midoriya. Learn to lighten up. Yet again, you are probably on empty with Toga…"
"I am two seconds from hanging up."
"Alright, alright." He hissed. "Sheesh! Remind me not to take you to any shows featuring black comedians. Anyway, I am calling this morning because I am in need of a favor."
"A favor, you ask."
"Relax, kid. It isn't anything sexual, today." He wheezed through his nose. "I am not sure if you have crossed paths with Kayama-sensei or not, but if you do, there is an important file I need to be sent to Endeavor's Hero Agency."
"Endeavor. As in…"
"Japan's Most Wanted and Musutafu's Most Hated. Yes, the Endeavor," he retorted. "Anyway, there are some important documents that require his John Hancock."
"Just documents?!"
"Relax! I am not sending you on a crazed mission." He snorted before spitting something out. "I would do it myself but I have morning hall duty. Plus, seeing that you are closer to the agency, I figured that you can go and do it for me, then come to class later."
"So, you want me to come to school, get the files, and then head back to the agency."
"Actually, since you say you are at the manga cafe, you can go by Kayama-sensei's apartment and obtain the files."
There was momentary silence.
"Still there, kid?"
"I am listening."
"The old girl tends to leave a key above the light outside of her apartment. I've spoken with her and she says that she has it on the couch somewhere."
"Then why didn't you say that in the first place."
"Midoriya, just because your balls dropped doesn't mean it can come back where even Bakugo couldn't find it."
"Sorry, Sensei."
"Please forgive me, kid. Still working on kicking the tobacco habit." He made another hawking sound before spitting something out. "Do me this favor, and there is $150 added to your pocket."
"To deliver these files?"
"They're time-sensitive so make haste. Plus, can a guy be a blessing? Call me when you're finished."
Aizawa-sensei hung up, leaving Izuku alone with his thoughts.
Shifting his head to the couch, sitting on the edge was a large brown envelope. Wiping the glaze from under his chin, he walked from the dining room table to the files in question.
To: Enji Todoroki
C.C.: Shouta Aizawa
Endeavor's Hero Agency
Izuku no longer could question the logic that has occurred over the last seventy-two hours. Seeing that the time was approaching a quarter till eight, he gathered his clothes to put on before heading out of Kayama-sensei's apartment.
However, before departing, he cleaned the dishes and took out the trash.
He may have protested last night's debacle, but he wasn't going to be a rude house guest.
About twenty minutes later….
It didn't surprise Izuku that Shouto's father's place of work was located in the tallest skyscraper of the city. With an individual with his head in the clouds or somewhere in the depths of his endless asshole, the agency's location seemed to be a perfect fit.
Once stepping out of the bus, he walked another block before entering the office building to head to Endeavor's Hero Agency.
Izuku was impressed by the building's decor. Azalea flowers lining up unilaterally on each end of the building. The large Nigerian security guard who appears tough with a soft heart as he inspected Izuku. The sounds of smooth jazz and waterfalls in the center of the office building gave it a tranquil feeling as Izuku searched for the front desk receptionist.
As he approached the desk, he saw the receptionist had her back against him. Not wanting to be rude, he pressed for the bell. The bell alerted the receptionist to turn.
"Endeavor's Hero Agency…." The blonde receptionist scratched her head. "Izuku?"
He was startled when seeing a familiar Pro Hero and by coincidence his sensei's best friend and partner-in-crime. The vain vixen produced a Cheshire Cat grin when seeing Izuku. "Well look what the Faunus dragged in."
He gave an awkward wave. "Morning, Auntie Yuu," he said as he bowed humbly.
"At ease, Izuku," she retorted. "Won't be pickpocketing you for cash...today."
"My pockets bless you," he retorted.
She giggled as she was examining her nails. "So, what brings you here today?" She furrowed her eyes. "If you're looking to ask for your money back…."
He wavered his hands. "No, no. I would love to, but…" He nervously smiled at the Nigerian security guard.
"Like a good neighbor, he is always there," she said teasingly. "So, seriously, what brings you here?"
Izuku reached into his backpack to present Yuu the file to hand over to Enji Todoroki.
"Oooo," she said happily. "This is the file that Todoroki needed with urgency," she said. She paid before looking at Izuku. "Why would you have this file?"
"A favor from Aizawa-sensei."
She nodded in compliance as she tapped on the file folder. "I see. I see." She shrugged her shoulders as she was nodding.
Izuku pursed his lip. "If there isn't anything else, I can go."
"Wait," she said. "You're going to need your signature."
"But I don't have my stamp."
"That's okay! Your John Hancock is fine for proof of interaction."
He extended his hand for a pen. She tapped his hand. "Not here. But upstairs in his office."
"Is that so?"
"To complete this file, he needs his signature and two witnesses. The timing must coincide."
Izuku wanted to protest, but why bother, he thought to himself. He was already late for class. Plus, he was receiving cash for this transaction. "Okay! I can do it."
She produced a smile. "Excellent!" She grabbed a sign indicating that she was going on break as she walked out of the desk. "Let's head upstairs, shall we?"
She nudged his shoulder as she pressed him to head to the elevator. When hearing the elevator door opened, they both stepped in.
"So, does Mr. Todoroki owns this entire building?"
"Sure does. This is his proudest possession."
"Can take care of a building, but not his wife and children." He mumbled under his breath before having his cheeks pulled by Yuu. "Ouch!"
"I've heard that!" She said as she pulled out a set of keys to insert into the slot. "This will take us to the executive suite."
"Hey! Why do you work for Mr. Todoroki anyway? Don't you work at another agency?"
"I fill in from time to time," she answered as she leaned against the wall. "Plus, nothing wrong in working to earn extra cash."
"Thought you would be too proud to beg with your vanity." He mumbled under his breath before having his cheeks pulled again by Yuu. "Ouch!"
"The next smart quip I am aiming for your hard noggin."
"Something that you should…." He paused, knowing he wasn't in the mood to be thumped by the vain Mount Lady.
The sound of the bell pang to the top floor. Yuu left first. Izuku was amazed by the red, grandiose carpeting and carpentry. He concluded that foreigners were responsible for this kind of architecture.
"Head straight at the end of the hall and that would be Mr. Todoroki's office."
Izuku nodded, understanding her directions.
Upon entering, he saw Mr. Todoroki's name on the door. Upon opening the door, his mouth went agape by the size of his office.
He stood in the living room where it had custom-made furniture. The couch appeared antique but could tell it was hardly used. The television was wide as one of his walls in his bedroom. In the center of the living room was a kotatsu. Looking at its design, he knew that it too was imported. He ventured further when he saw that the couple had a huge entertainment center surrounding the television. He thought that they must have the latest in stereo equipment. He saw on the shelves the abundance of DVDs. His mouth wanted to water on that sight.
"Is this an office or his private penthouse," questioned Izuku.
"A bit of both," responded Yuu as she closed the door. After pressing a few keys on the panel, the sound of the door securely locked. "Whenever he wants to be away from the family, he wants to have his privacy."
"With a penthouse like this, I wouldn't go back either," said Izuku. It was met with another tug on the cheek. "Ouch!"
"Sorry," she said teasingly. "Your cheeks are so adorable. They remind me of squirrel cheeks."
Izuku blushed as he tried finding the whereabouts of Mr. Todoroki. However, Yuu beat him to the punch. "He is on the way, but he is expecting you. Just have a seat on the couch and find something to watch." She slapped his back. "I will go and get refreshments."
Izuku nodded as he took a seat.
Finding the remote control, he was trying to find suitable programming. Well, I wouldn't mind watching an animated show about a group of girls who were aspiring huntresses who attended this magical academy. Nah, nevermind. Since their creator died, so did the sense of the show.
He decided to settle to watch Invader Zim as he wanted for Yuu with the refreshments.
A few moments later, he could hear Yuu returning to the main area. "Izuku, I am back!"
"Cool, I wouldn't mind having a…."
His mouth was agape when seeing what Yuu was sporting - which was absolutely nothing. Yuu was in her birthday suit holding a tray that contained drinks and snacks.
"Yuu?!"
"What," she asked playfully. "Would you care for a cola, a rice cracker, or a sweet taste of warm giblet pie."
Izuku looked onto the heavens. "Holy Pyrrha in heaven. Not again!"
To be continued….