April 20, 2011
Harry arrived first thing in the morning to find curtains drawn around Ruth's hospital bed. He paused, not knowing if he should leave or call out or something.
"Is that you, Harry?" came Ruth's voice from within the shrouded space.
"Yes, sorry, should I come back later?" he asked, feeling more awkward by the moment.
The curtain was suddenly pulled back, and Ruth could be seen adjusting the jumper she was wearing. It was a very pretty blue that brought out the color of her eyes, and Harry smiled to see her wear it. Though, to be fair, nowadays he always smiled to see her.
"Just checking incisions. Required a bit more undressing than just a hospital gown," Doctor Harvey said. "As I just told Ruth, she's healing perfectly. Her treatments will be able to begin next week as scheduled."
They'd been a bit worried about that. If she weren't properly recovered from surgery, the chemotherapy would just absolutely destroy her. The treatment course that Ruth had selected with Doctor Blake gave her the best chance for remission in the shortest amount of time, but it was also the most aggressive and most taxing for her body. She needed to regain her strength from surgery before they could begin. They were only five days away from it now. The trouble would really begin there.
Doctor Harvey left a moment later, leaving Harry alone with Ruth, just how they spent most days. Ruth looked a little tired but she smiled. "Are those for me?"
Harry had forgotten that he was holding a bouquet of flowers in his hand. "Oh, yes, of course," he said. He went to get the vase out of the cabinet in the corner—each room had one for flowers from well-wishers—and filled it with some water.
There was a rustle from the bed behind him as he was in the small lavatory connected to Ruth's room. That was the only place there was a sink, and the small counter was useful for his flower arranging. He didn't turn around, assuming Ruth was just moving around.
"Doctor Harvey sounded optimistic. As optimistic as she could, I suppose. Surgeons are always a little cold like that," Harry said, trying to make conversation.
He found himself feeling nervous. He wasn't quite sure why. Perhaps it was the somewhat strange morning he'd had before arriving at the hospital a few minutes later than usual. Perhaps it was the curtain that had put him on the back foot as soon as he'd walked in. Perhaps it was the fact that the chemo would be starting in less than a week and he was absolutely terrified over what might happen when it did.
When Ruth didn't answer, he went to look back at the bed, but before he did, he felt arms wrap around his middle from behind. "Oh, hello," he said, chuckling. Ruth had padded silently through the room without him realizing. She hugged him tight, and Harry put down the flowers and turned in her grasp to hold her properly. She tilted her head up to look at him. Without shoes on, she really was a petite thing.
"You didn't kiss me hello," she noted.
"You're right, I'm terribly sorry for the error," he replied playfully. He leaned in to brush his lips on hers. Sometimes she would deepen their kiss, but she didn't today. Ruth gave a happy little sigh and rested her head on his shoulder, nuzzling against his neck.
Harry just held her close and breathed her in. They'd spent the last few weeks with this new romantic and committed understanding between them. And they had shared quite a few kisses and cuddles whenever possible. But Ruth had only been allowed to get up out of bed for the last two days. Harry was not used to having her up and about, but it was very nice. Ruth was much happier being able to walk around and not get stiff and bored in bed all day. And getting to hold her like this and kiss her without her very restricted movement was wonderful.
"Everything alright?" he asked softly. His hands wandered up and down her back, feeling her small frame inside her soft jumper. It was still so new that he could do this, that he could touch her, that he did not have to restrain himself with self-control and self-denial where Ruth was concerned.
Ruth hummed against his skin. "I wish I could go home. I wish we could be together outside of this hospital," she grumbled.
"Have you spoken to the doctors? Could they discharge you for a few days, do you think?"
"I asked Doctor Harvey just now. She said that it would be another day or so before she, as my surgeon would allow it, but she was rather sure that Doctor Blake would want her to stay for monitoring to make sure things were progressing properly," Ruth answered.
He placed his hands on her hips and pulled her off him ever so slightly so he could look at her properly. "Then you'll have to stay. I'll be here as often as I can. And you're not bedbound anymore, so we can go on little walks together, if you want."
Her eyes shone in the harsh light of the little bathroom. She searched his face, though he had no idea what she was looking for or whether she found it. But then she spoke softly and said, "I love you, Harry."
It did not escape him for one moment that this was the first time she had ever said those three words to him. He suddenly felt warm all over and perhaps like he was going to be sick or possibly burst into tears.
But Ruth did not leave him to flounder for long. She got up on her toes and kissed him again. More fervently this time. And her lips moving on his made Harry snap into focus almost immediately. He kissed her back with everything he had. His hand on her hips slipped underneath her jumper. The feel of her warm, soft skin was enough to make his knees go weak. If he thought about it, he'd scold himself to get a grip on himself. It wasn't as though he was some fumbling teenager touching a girl for the first time. But this wasn't just some woman he was seducing out of his knickers. This was Ruth, and he loved her more than anything in the world. And, come to think of it…
He pulled away, breathing heavily. "I love you," he said, realizing he'd not said it back to her.
She beamed at him. "I sort of figured you did."
They both laughed a little, giddy and happy together, and he kissed her again.
Ruth was the one to pull back this time, stepping all the way out of his embrace. He was bereft of the feel of her skin, but she did not make any indication that she even noticed that his hands were on her. "You didn't let me get a good look at those flowers before you scurried off in here with them. What made you get me flowers, hmm?" she asked, turning her attention to the half-arranged bouquet on the counter.
Harry shook himself, needing his body to calm down after the flurry of emotion and arousal that coursed through him. He stepped back to the flower arrangement. "I was going to get our breakfast and found the cart closed. I forgot Easter is coming up. The shopkeepers are quite religious, so they've closed up for a week. There's a sign posted, but I never paid much attention to it."
"Not like you to be absent-minded," Ruth noted.
"I must be going soft in my retirement," he teased in return.
A flicker of a smile passed over her face, and she chose not to comment on his remark. "That doesn't explain why you've shown up with flowers instead of coffee and a croissant."
"There's a flower seller beside the coffee cart, so I decided that would be a nice change. And since you are walking about, I thought maybe we could go have breakfast together in the cafeteria downstairs," he suggested.
Her smile grew. "That sounds really lovely, Harry, thank you."
"Good. That's good. But I think these flowers should get into the water before we go eat."
"May I help, or are you going to get cross and possessive over flower arranging?" Ruth asked.
Harry laughed at that, noting the way Ruth's eyes seemed to sparkle whenever he laughed. He wondered if she found his laugh as magical as he found hers. She did love him, after all. She'd just told him so. "You know I'm always appreciative of any help you can provide, Ruth."
She stood beside him and helped put the roses and lilies and carnations and irises in a nice assortment in the vase. There almost wasn't enough space for all the flowers, but they managed. And once they'd finished that to their satisfaction, Harry put the vase out on the table beside Ruth's bed and she found her shoes. She wrote a little note to the nurses, saying she was down in the cafeteria if they were looking for her.
With that, Ruth and Harry left her room to go find themselves some breakfast. Harry took her hand as they walked, and Ruth laced her fingers with his.