Hey everyone!

Wow, it's the final week of the year. Or honestly, I should probably say decade because that's what it's felt like. There's no way Jan 2020 happened in the same year as Dec 2020.

Regardless of how the year went for you, I hope you managed to find some pockets of joy, love and warmth throughout and I hope I was able to provide that for you in some way. I am so grateful for the support and love I have received from you all, and I will never stop being grateful that you are still here loving PJO with me.

Happy reading!

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson and the Olympians. Obviously.

A Very Long Table Read

Halfway into the table read, I decided it was all Mr Brunner's fault.

If he hadn't decided to spew his claptrap about people being surprising and giving things chances today, on top of whatever Calypso had been filling my head with regarding sexual tension, I would probably have been just fine. The two of them had thrown me off my guard and my brain, already dealing with multiple shake-ups in my life, had malfunctioned. I would never have had such a…disturbing reaction to Percy Jackson otherwise.

Yes, that had to be it.

Having satisfactorily explained away my traitorous body, I sternly directed my thoughts back to the script spread out on the table before me. Mr Brunner had been running through some of the more minor scenes to get us all warmed up before we tackled the major ones, and I'd thankfully had very few lines in all of them so far.

I wouldn't be able to get away with that for a lot longer though, not when we were approaching the longer scenes that heavily featured Anastasia and Dimitri.

I kept my head down, not allowing myself to look at anything except my script – and especially not at the place directly opposite me. As long as I stayed focused on what mattered, I would be fine.

"Alright, let's turn to Scene 12!" Mr Brunner announced. "Annabeth, Percy, and Nico, you're up."

The rustling of pages echoed in my ears as I flipped to the scene, hoping against hope that it wasn't romantic. I knew they were coming, that I would have to stand beside Percy and gaze into his eyes and croon sweet nothings and ki…

NOPE.

I wrenched my mind away from the K-word, banishing all thoughts of it from my mind as I landed on Scene 12 and realized with relief that it was the scene with Anastasia, Dimitri and Vlad in the train. I'd rehearsed this scene with Piper, and I knew that the majority of it was just banter.

Banter was fine. I could do banter. It was almost a daily ritual for Percy and me anyway.

"Pooka sits on the window seat, tongue out and wagging his tail innocently as Dimitri glares at him," Mr Brunner read. "Dimitri huffs and moves over to sit next to Anya, ignoring Vlad laughing at him. Anya is slouched down in her seat, turning over the pendant of her necklace in her hand as she gazes out the window at the falling snow."

"Stop fiddling with that thing," Percy read, his voice strangely toneless and flat. "And sit up straight – you're a Grand Duchess, remember."

"Oh, and you're the expert on what Grand Duchesses do or don't do?" I retorted scornfully.

"Look, I'm just trying to help you, okay?"

"How sweet of you. But tell me, Dimitri, do you really think I'm royalty?"

"You know I do, love."

"Then quit bossing me around!"

"Okay stop," Mr Brunner broke in. "Both of you, stop."

I snapped my head to the front of the table, surprised. Percy had sounded about as invested in his lines as he was in history homework, but I'd thought I'd been doing quite well. After all, it hadn't really been too hard to be scornful and pissed off at Percy.

Okay, it had been the easiest thing in the world.

"Are you two planning to stand on stage and read your lines to the lighting rig?" my teacher asked in exasperation, placing both elbows on the table and leaning forward. "I know you guys have your issues but is it too much to ask that you actually look at each other when you're acting?"

A pit of dread opened up in my stomach, yawning open wider and further as I slowly lifted my eyes from the table.

Percy was already looking at me.

His jaw was clenched, head angled slightly upward so that he was on level with my forehead instead of my eyes. His gaze dropped to mine as I looked up, Adam's apple bobbing in his throat as he swallowed slightly. I couldn't help but notice that his eyes hadn't quite lightened, dark rings still circling the sea-foam green of his irises.

"Thank you," Mr Brunner announced, his words tinged with sarcasm. "We'll skip scene 12 for now. Go to the next scene, please."

I flipped my script to the next page, quickly running over the lines and feeling the dread in my stomach creep up to my throat. Scene 13 exclusively featured Anastasia and Dimitri and I had a sneaking suspicion that that was exactly why Mr Brunner had picked it.

"Dimitri re-enters the compartment and sits in front of Anya, who is pretending to read a book," Mr Brunner recited. "He gathers his thoughts and tries to regain her good favour."

"Look," Percy began, his voice sounding more natural than before, "I think we got off on the wrong foot."

"Great," I responded. "I think we did too."

"Okay," Percy said, sounding relieved. "So we're good?"

"Yeah. I appreciate your apology."

"Apology?" Percy asked in disbelief. "Who said anything about an apology? I was just saying – "

"Oh please don't talk," I said in irritation, feeling like I had never related to Anastasia more than in that moment. "You're only going to annoy me."

"Fine," Percy said, his voice growing more heated. "Let's both shut up then."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Anastasia and Dimitri sit with arms crossed, facing opposite directions," Mr Brunner read. "Anya looks out the window for a while. Eventually, she breaks the silence."

"Will you miss it?" I read.

"Miss what?" Percy snarked. "Your talking?"

"Oh hilarious," I shot back, rolling my eyes. "No. Russia."

"Nope," he said dismissively. "Why would I?"

"Because it was your home?"

"Russia? My home? You must be joking."

"Well then you must plan on making Paris your true home."

"What is it with you and homes?"

"Well, isn't it something every normal person wants?" I asked. "A home? A family to love you and be there for you?"

Suddenly, I wasn't in a train car rattling across eastern Russia, a lost princess on my way to find my destiny. I wasn't thinking of Anastasia at all – I was thinking of my father, the way I'd never seen a single fleeting moment of warmth or affection in his eyes, the way I had tried, was still trying, to find some way to make him look at me at all.

"A family?" Percy scoffed. "I don't need a family."

"Everyone needs a family," I said, and even though I had rehearsed the line with a rising tone, with the build-up to a yell, my voice came out soft and quiet.

"Oh yeah?" Percy asked, but even as the words came out pitch-perfect, there was something not quite right about his voice. "Let me tell you something about the world, Anya. You can't rely on family. You can't rely on anyone but yourself because the more people you care about, the easier it is to do things for them – stupid things that put you in danger. Love is a trap, and the sooner you learn that, the better."

The line was said word-for-word as it was in the script but there was something different, a thread of caustic bitterness wrapped around mocking sarcasm. The words came out too rough, painful and twisted like he was choking it out through shards of broken glass.

I knew the lines I was supposed to say next – oh, aren't you a ray of sunshine – but somehow Percy's voice wouldn't stop ringing in my head, the despairing ache of those words in which I'd been supposed to hear Dimitri, but strangely hadn't at all. I was reminded again suddenly of the way I'd seen him walk into the auditorium earlier, as listless and defeated as a man on death row.

But that had been a figment of my imagination. It had to be.

"Annabeth?" Mr Brunner called.

"Sorry," I said quickly, cursing myself for daydreaming about impossible things, but even as I spoke the next line, my eyes returned to the boy opposite me.

I had seen Percy in a range of situations.

I had seen him cocky, flirty, sarcastic. I had seen him tired and joyful and determined. I had even seen him cold and detached, that winter's day so long ago, the one I had sworn not to think about.

I had never seen him like this.

His face was startlingly severe, all sharp angles and lines with not a hint of cocksure charm or humour to smooth the razor edge of his cheekbones, the flat grimness of his lips. He was gripping his script so tightly I nearly thought he was about to rip the pages, and his eyes –

Holy hell, his eyes.

I'd thought them whirlpools before. I'd been so wrong.

His eyes were the stormy grey-green of the ocean during a hurricane, lashing waves of fury and disdain, so full of hatred and cold rage that I nearly flinched. In all the years I'd known him, in every argument and fight and even the day he'd left me sobbing in the woods, he had never once looked at me like this.

"Percy?"

His name left my mouth in a whisper, drawn forth from the Annabeth who had been left wondering why her best friend had abandoned her, the Annabeth I hadn't realized still dwelled somewhere inside of me.

Percy's eyes cleared at the sound of my voice like clouds scattering after the rain, looking almost surprised to see me seated in front of him when he'd just been glaring at me like he would have been happy to see me burn to death. My temper, slowly bubbling up over every confusing, awful, incident that I'd been subjected to over the last week, snapped like a rubber band that had been stretched too far.

He had spent years of my life as the most frustrating, complex, indecipherable enigma I had been cursed to solve, breaking my heart one day and flirting with me the next, and now he wanted to be mad at me?

"What on earth have I ever done to you?" I lashed out, slapping my palms down on the table. "I'm trying to be professional and you just want to glare at me like a toddler having a tantrum?"

"What?" Percy sounded confused, which only fuelled my rising fury. "No, I- "

A knock on the door cut Percy off.

I looked up to see a tall, flaxen-haired man at the door, smiling and looking strangely familiar. I frowned, wracking my brains as I tried to place his face. I knew him – but where?

"Ah, Mr Ugliano," Mr Brunner said cheerily, rising to his feet. "Mr D told me that you would be dropping in today, but I expected you later. I would have come up to the office if I'd known."

The name struck a lightning bolt of remembrance in my head.

Of course. Gabe Ugliano, Percy's stepfather.

I'd seen him a couple of times when he'd first started dating Percy's mother, a charming, handsome man who had made us lemonade and taken us ice-skating. Percy had been so happy to have a father, his eyes lighting up every time Gabe ruffled his hair or joked around with him. I'd been happy for him, for Sally, who had been like a second mother to me, and who deserved every happiness in the world. She'd been glowing at their wedding, radiant and beautiful, and Percy and I had drunk too much fruit punch and danced ourselves dizzy in the snow.

Three months and sixteen days later, he'd asked me to meet him in the woods.

"Oh, nonsense," Gabe was saying, striding up to the front of the table to shake Mr Brunner's hand. "It's my fault, and anyway, I wanted to come down and see how my funds were being put to good use."

"Well, the theatre department is most grateful for your generous donations," Mr Brunner said, smiling. "Hopefully, you'll be able to come down and see for yourself on opening night."

"Of course," Gabe nodded. "And I have double the reason to come, since it seems Percy has landed the leading role. Something he's kept from me, eh?"

He turned to face the table, mockingly wagging his finger at Percy and shaking his head.

"Busted," Percy joked, no hint of his earlier animosity on his face. "I didn't want you and Mom to come down and embarrass me."

"We won't miss it," Gabe promised, and for a second I almost thought I heard something else behind his words, an undercurrent of menace beneath the humour, but then Gabe turned back to Mr Brunner with a laugh, so at ease that I must have been mistaken.

That seemed to be happening concerningly often lately.

"I really do apologize that you had to come down here," Mr Brunner said again. "We're in the middle of our table read, you see, and I thought I would have plenty of time to finish up before you came."

"Oh don't worry about it," Gabe assured. "As a matter of fact, I wouldn't have disturbed you at all, but unfortunately the board meeting has been moved up to five and Dionysus insists that you be there."

"Damnit," Mr Brunner cursed. "Apollo again?"

Gabe rolled his eyes. "You know how he is with scheduling."

"All too well," Mr Brunner said with a grimace. "You go on ahead and let him know I'll be up in ten. I just need to finish up here."

As Gabe left the room with a wave to Percy, our teacher turned to us with a sigh. "Unfortunately, I'm going to have to end it here, guys. You're free to go now but, and I'm sorry to do this, I'll need you all back here bright and early on Saturday."

There was a chorus of muted groans around the room, quickly hushed as Mr Brunner levelled a stern gaze at us. The drama society usually met on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but having a production meant that our rehearsal days included Mondays and Saturdays as well. Mr Brunner tried to let us have the weekend as much as possible, but more often than not I'd spent my Saturdays covered in paint and rooting through dusty boxes to pull out old costumes for alteration.

"Percy and Annabeth," Mr Brunner called, his voice unusually serious. "Can I see you two for a second please?"

My heart sank in my chest. No, scratch that – it plummeted to the bottom of my feet, through the floor and into the centre of the earth. I had a good feeling I knew what he wanted to see us about, and no part of me wanted the talk that was going to follow.

Calypso and Piper gave me sympathetic looks as they packed up and brushed past me, promising that they would wait for me in the parking lot. I slowly dragged myself to my feet, trudging up the velvety carpet to where my teacher awaited.

Percy and I stood fidgeting as students folded up scripts, tucked away highlighters and pushed their chairs in. Mr Brunner didn't say a word as the room emptied out, many of the cast members shooting glances back at us and whispering to one another as they left. The last one out was Drew, who stopped at the door to give me a poison-sweet smile, one that made it all too clear that she wasn't about to forgive or forget what had happened earlier.

It would probably be too much to hope that she'd rip a nail and contract genital herpes.

Mr Brunner didn't say anything for a couple of moments after the room was completely empty, gathering up his papers as the silence stretched out long and slow. The quiet felt unnerving, raising the hairs at the back of my neck and forming beads of sweat along my hairline even in the New York winter. I was acutely aware of my proximity to Percy, shifting his weight from foot to foot and leaning ever-so-slightly closer every time he did. Weirdly, the thought that he was as uncomfortable as I was made me feel slightly better. At least I wouldn't be enduring Mr Brunner's disapproval alone.

His papers set atop one another in a neat pile, Mr Brunner sighed and finally looked up at the two of us.

"Do you know why I chose you?" he asked simply.

Neither Percy nor I dared to answer.

"I chose you because despite what I knew about both of you, despite every warning I received from the faculty not to pair you two together, I saw you bring these characters to life in a way no one else even came close to doing. And I thought that two people who were so good at what they did would be able to put aside a silly little rivalry for the sake of the production."

"But she – "

"He was the one – "

Mr Brunner held up a hand, and both of us fell silent.

"Clearly, I thought wrong," he said, and the disappointment in his voice felt like a punch to the heart. "But truthfully, it doesn't matter to me what reasons you have to hate one another. For the sake of the cast, the crew, and the production itself – you better sort out whatever exists between you. Because it's obviously too much to ask that you be professional around each other."

With that stinging zinger, our teacher picked up his paperwork and left the room, leaving Percy and I entirely alone.

For a second, neither of us moved.

Then I whirled on him and jabbed him in the chest with my finger. "What the hell is your problem?"

"My problem?" Percy asked with a disbelieving laugh. "In case you haven't noticed, Annabeth, I've been nothing but pleasant to you. You're the one who likes to treat me like I just killed your dog."

"Pleasant?" I yelled. "So that's what you call glaring at me? Flirting with me like I'm just another toy for you to use and discard?"

"I have never – "

"You sure do like to use that word a lot for someone who doesn't seem to know what it means," I said scathingly. "Or do you not remember what you told me?"

Percy opened his mouth, but I didn't give him the chance to get a single word out, fuelled by the force of five years of rage, five years of questions with no answers, no explanations.

"You were never my friend," I quoted, spitting each word out with perfect enunciation and taking a savage pleasure in seeing the recognition in Percy's eyes. "You never will be. That's what you said, isn't it?"

Percy took a step backwards, a flurry of emotions playing across his face, there and gone before I could decipher any of them. But I didn't care about his feelings, didn't care if he was about to laugh in my face. For half a decade I had restrained myself from ever bringing up the Incident, from thinking about how he'd cut me off and left me in the dirt like I was trash on the bottom of his shoe, but I was done.

I was done with being disappointed and abandoned. I was done with being treated like I was disposable. And I was done putting up with Perseus Jackson.

"Listen, Annabeth, you have no idea what you're talking about," Percy said hotly, eyes flashing with anger – as if he had some kind of right to be angry. "You don't know the first thing – "

"You're right," I interrupted. "I don't know. And do you know what, Percy? I don't care."

I turned away from him and strode to my place at the table, shoving my things into my bag and wanting nothing more than to get the hell away. I had just made it to the door when Percy got there, slamming it shut and bracing his arm against it to hold it closed.

"We're doing this again?" I asked sardonically.

"As long as it's the only way to get you to listen to me," he said flatly. "Yes."

"Why did you do it?"

His hold on the door weakened for a moment. "What?"

"Why did you do it?" I asked again, shouldering my bag over my shoulder. I could tell by the look on his face that he understood what I meant.

His eyes dropped, closed blinds over an empty house, and I knew that this would be another day just like the last, unanswered questions washed up against unbending stone.

"I can't tell you," Percy said at last, his voice as quiet and low as the night tide rolling onto the beach.

I looked up at his face, the boy who had once been my best friend. He still had the slightest smattering of freckles across the bridge of his nose, the small scar across the edge of his eyebrow from the day we'd jumped from the treehouse and he had caught his face on the corner of a plank.

"Then there's nothing for me to listen to," I said tiredly. The last remnants of my anger dropped away from me like deadweight, all the fight gone from my voice. I just felt exhausted, so unimaginably exhausted that all I wanted to do was go home and take a long, long nap.

This time, Percy didn't stop me as I opened the door and walked away.

Poor Annabeth. Life just keeps getting worse and worse for her huh?

But you know what they say…once you've hit rock bottom, there's nowhere to go but up ;)

Anyway, I'm sorry this took a little longer than I promised but this chapter went in a totally different direction than I expected. Honestly, I shouldn't be surprised – I plan a story and the characters just hijack it and do whatever they want anyway.

I hope you guys had a very merry Christmas (if you celebrate it) and I'm wishing you all a super happy New Year! Let me know what Christmas presents you received and what resolutions you have for 2021 (if you don't have any, honestly same. I know I'm still going to be the same lazy potato at the end of every year so why lie to myself right?)

As always, please review and let me know your thoughts! I love hearing from you all.

Till next time, take care!