Downhill.
Draco felt shitty. What more could he use to describe how he was doing?
It's been weeks, agonizing slow weeks, in total radio silence both from Alec and Harry. Both were ignoring Draco and it was driving him crazy.
More and more he found himself going down to the kitchen and crying his eyes out in Dobby's chest.
It hurt, he knew that he had done wrong and ended up hurting both boys, but it hurt just so much, it was driving Draco crazy and his magic unsteady.
Draco was failing terribly, his bagic wouldn't listen to him, blowing off when it wasn't needed and not coming when he needed it.
Like in transfiguration, he needed to change a rat into a pink porcelain tea cup, he tried, he tried his best to concentrate his magic to go through his wand and do the not so complicated charm work but still something went off, ending up charming Blase hair neon pink.
It was as if his magic was laughing at him, punishing him for being so reckless.
Remus tried to help, signing him up for extra duel lessons, excusing it as needing to run off unwelcome energy.
So almost every day, Draco would go up to Lupin's class and blass out all his energy, ending up being so drained that he barely carried himself to his dorm room, passing out almost right away.
And it was better that way, doing so didn't leave him much time to overthink all that have happened and miss both his friendships.
It helped his magic too, after just a couple weeks it calmed down, slowly settling back deep inside his bones, listening to him much better, no longer giving him such difficulty to do school work.
But his mood stayed cloudy.
His sass level only grew, making it almost unbearable for anyone to hang around him.
One time he even set Pansy to tears, earning a nasty hex from Blaise for it.
It was nearing christmas break and right now, Draco was just done, he was annoyed and his body was aching and he just wanted to sleep for a week straight, or more preferably, sleep to never wake up ever again.
He pushed open the door for Remus' classroom to drop off his assignment so he could just go straight to bed and bury himself under his many blankets.
Remus was there, leaning against his desk with Sirius standing in between his legs, arms wrapped around Remus, Remus arms was around Sirius, one pulling at his hair while the other was pushed under Sirius sweater, resting on the small of his back.
- You should keep this parody of a romance out of people's eyes. - Draco stayed unfazed, bored, making his way deeper into the class, letting heavy doors fall shut behind him with a not so silent bang.
Remus cursed making Sirius almost growl, turning slowly to look at Draco with a death glare but before he could say anything Remus softly pushed him to the side, straightening up quickly and smiling shyly at Draco, running one hand through his own messy hair.
- Draco, I thought that we didn't agree on another lesson this evening since today was kinda rough? - Remus raised a brow while Sirius already shifted back closer, wrapping his arms protectively around Remus, resting his chin on Remus shoulder.
- We didn't. I just came to drop off my assignment. - Draco rolled his eyes, pulling out his roll of parchment from his bag and giving it to Remus only it being snatched out of his hand by Sirius.
- What a reason to disturb. -
- Well, maybe if you would do this out of office hours, then no one would come to disturb you. - Draco snapped back.
- Boys. - Remus tried.
- Oh, one to talk, as if you care about office hours yourself! Snappy pureblood who thinks that he can have everything on a silver platter. -
- Talking about yourself here? - Draco crossed his arms over his chest.
- Enough! - Remus called out in his strict teacher tone, making both Sirius and Draco to shut their mouths. - Tea? I see that something is bothering you. You need to talk it out or else you will turn in such a sulky mess as Sirius can get time from time. -
- Hey! - Sirius called out, already a smile forming, pecking Remus cheek.
They all burst out laughing before making their way deeper into Remus' chambers and sitting down by the fireplace.
Draco let his eyes drop shut, sinking deeper into the comfortable airchair.
Sirius nudged his feet with his own, making Draco open his eyes and look over to slightly worried Sirius.
- He's still not replying to your owls? - Sirius asked with such a gentle tone that it made Draco's eyes start to burn with unshed tears.
He just shook his head, not trusting his voice.
- I'll talk to him, he has a game this weekend that he invited me to. I'll talk with him about all this. -
- You don't need to… -
- But I want to. It is driving both of you crazy, you know, he's not doing well himself. At least the last time I talked to him, he wasn't sounding too good. -
Draco dropped his head against the armchair, closing his eyes and signing.
- I just want him back. I can't… I… Grr. - Draco pulled at his messy hair, flustrated.
- You know that you hurt him pretty badly. -
- I know, I don't need a reminder, it hurts a lot and I know that he's hurting even more. He was just so pissed! He hasn't called me Malfoy in years! Actually since we first met and he put me in my place. Damn. - Draco was fighting back tears.
- I know how you both feel. You know what I did when I heard that some girl had kissed Remus back when we were in school? - Sirius placed a hand on Draco's knee, something glinting in his eyes.
Draco shook his head, not taking his eyes off of Sirius.
- It drove me crazy, I got so angry but what could I do? If that would be a guy, maybe I could punch him or something. But I knew that I couldn't do that since we were just friends and nothing more, at least not officially. So I just kept that anger in and it just kept building up and I got really reckless, well, even more than usual. I kept pushing Remus away, hurting him that way, because it just hurt not just the thought that he had found someone but also that it was a girl not a boy, marking that I had zero chance. So I just did more reckless pranks, landing myself in detention every damn day just to avoid Remus, getting into fights and arguments about nothing. - It was Sirius' turn to shake his head.
- And what happened then? - Draco whispered.
- Climax, I guess. It got to the uncontrollable point and I landed myself in the hospital wing for two weeks by falling off the broom while playing quidditch. We still won, just in case you were wondering. - Sirius smirked. - But it was really stupid from me, I didn't care that I could die but you should have seen what it did to Remus, he was a real wolf in that moment. I was sure that he would just tear me up piece by piece if not that I already was barely holding together by that point. But it made us talk it all out, more like shoot it all out, explain each other and shit like that. It was still pretty rough after, for a couple weeks we still were too tender to really fall back to how it used to be, but slowly with keeping on trying, we got back to each other, stronger than before. - Sirius leaned back on the sofa.
In that moment Remus alleviates steaming tea mugs to the small table in front of him, wrapping his arms around Sirius from behind and placing a small peck against Sirius forehead.
- But you know what I did next time a guy simply tried to kiss him? Then I just outright punched him because no one is touching my Moony. - Sirius smirked, making both Draco and Remus laugh.
- Are you hinting that our son should just punch it out with Alec and Draco? - Remus couldn't hide his amusement.
- It wouldn't do him bad, maybe he would get his mind straight for a moment. Well, as straight as gay could get. - Sirius once again was cracking jokes, lightening moods and making Draco completely forget his worries, feeling light and warm.
They stayed like that for another hour, sipping tea and eating Sirius baked cookies, chatting about everything and nothing. Sirius trading more stories about their pranks and times in school.
By the end Draco was completely calm and lighter than he had felt in a long time. Also the amount of tasty tea and cookies made him feel full and sleepy.
- I'll lead you back to your room, you look like you will pass out any minute now. - Sirius got up, sitting Remus feet softly out of his lap and reached for Draco, helping him get up, throwing Draco's bag over his shoulder and leading the way.
They stopped by the Slytherin dorm entry, Draco turned to look Sirius deep in the eyes.
- Just please make sure that he's okay. - Draco sighted, running a hand tiredly through his hair before turning away and getting to his bed.
It was already a week since he talked to Sirius, still no news from Alec or Harry.
Draco was falling back in his dark hole, not really eating, skipping meals or simply forgetting about them, he hardly slept, nightmares spiking up again wearing him down even more.
On top of it all, he tried his best to do well in all studies, getting angry later from Lucius about his grades, implying that if Draco failed, there sure will be a punishment waiting for him when he goes home.
Remus tried to help, trying to encourage Harry to talk to Draco, setting them together in his lessons.
But well, it wouldn't be Potter, if Harry wouldn't be so damn stubborn. Refusing to talk to Draco even as much as doing actively their projects.
And the closer weekend came, the more Draco just couldn't take it anymore.
He doesn't even know how it started but something was screwed up with their small project and then they both were shouting at each other, blaming each other for things they did wrong, furry rising in between them with every passing second.
- I just can't anymore! No matter what I do it won't be enough for you! Will it ever?! Why even bother to be my friend if you hate me so crealy?! - Draco shouted in defeat, his eyes stinging, no strength left in him.
- You are just so fucking dumb! I don't hate you but well, thank you so much for thinking about me so low! - Harry just shouted back.
And then his hand collided with Draco's collarbone with a crunch that sure couldn't mean anything good, making Draco fall back, hitting ground with a loud thud.
And maybe it was just an accident, Harry liked to use his hands a lot while talking, especially when he was angry but there it was, pain as lightning shooting through Draco's bones, traveling around his blood.
He shut his eyes tightly, trying to stay as still as possible, knowing damn well that the more you move, the more it will hurt, alerting your brain and nerves even more.
In an instant warm hands were cupping his cheeks, making him open his eyes in small slits just to shut them back close, hating how much the ceiling seemed to tilt over him, as if laughing at him and wanting to crush him as a small beetle.
- It's a broken collarbone. I'll take him down to the hospital wing. Everyone else can go back to their common room! Today's lesson has finished! - Lupin's authoritative voice rang through the room.
Draco tried to breath through his nose, not daring to open his mouth, he was sure that he was grinding his teeth but he really couldn't care less about it, knowing damn well what his parents would have to say about such mannerism.
There was the warm hand pushing back his hair that seemed to stick to his forehead, giving him a bit of comfort.
- I'll levitate you, okay? It should hurt way less than carrying you. Just please continue to breath. - Remus said somewhere close to his ear in such a soft voice full of caring that tears escaped Draco's closed eyelids.
All of sudden he felt like he was flying, softly and slowly, comforting in a calming way.
Short trip to the hospital wing lulled Draco to short lasting sleep.
He woke up with a soundless gasp, almost tilting himself up in sitting position but a big hand was pushing his healthy shoulder down, helping Draco sink deeper into the soft bed under him.
It was hard to breathe, or did he simply forget to do it for a moment there?
Everything was in a big daze, he couldn't concentrate but has he ever been able to concentrate while going through such pain? He didn't think so, at least he couldn't remember what he had thought while being under crucio. Has he thought anything at all? Probably only about begging it to stop.
Madam Pomfrey was doing her job and then the pain was gone but he still felt so drained.
The warm hand was softly brushing his hair back, staying by his side.
He later connected that the hand was Remus'.
They give him different kinds of potions to drink and Draco really should have told them that he shouldn't but who was to argue if they so softly tilted his head to help him drink them?
He knew that he was on the thin edge of slipping, but right in that moment he just couldn't care, he let the darkness drag him away into nothingness, welcoming it as his oldest friend.
Being fully exhausted and on potions helped knock Draco out through the whole night.
Only downside to that was that he woke up with a pounding headache that made him groan right away even before opening his eyes.
Madam Pomfrey was there in an instant, giving Draco another, smaller vial, of potion that helped calm his headache down.
She did her diagnostics, frown on her lips.
Draco sighs, knowing questions that will follow so he slowly pushes himself up in sitting position, leaning against the headboard.
- Your bones are very fragile. There are a lot of healed tissues. - She looked pointedly at Draco.
- All are because of my illness back in second year. Nothing too important. - Draco kept his bored look, still feeling tired.
- And being underweight? -
- Same thing. - Draco sigh - I'm okay, really. No need to worry. -
It seems that his answer didn't please Madam Pomfrey one bit but in years working with children have taught her to keep her tongue behind her teeth.
- Professor Lupin was really worried, he said that after breakfast he will stop by. Also Mr. Potter wanted to visit you. Today I'm keeping you here to make sure that you are feeling alright and that bones have been mended together properly and that you eat enough food. - With that she was gone leaving Draco alone.
He didn't need to wait long for Remus to show up, carrying breakfast for Draco.
Just seeing the amount of food made Draco scrunch up his nose.
- I know, I know. But you need to eat, even a little bit. Helps with headaches and everything feeling stiff around mended bone. - Remus sits down beside Draco. - Brought you your favorite tea. - He pressed a cup in Draco's cold hands.
- Thank you. - Draco breaths out, closing his eyes and enjoying how warmth was seeping into his fingers.
- Also, I have something else for you. But for that you need to wait for tomorrow. - Remus smiled and Draco just rolled his eyes.
- Is it detention? - He asked, already feeling better, starting to sip on his tea that was in the perfect temperature already.
- Nah. Not a big fan of these. Something a lot more pleasant. Something from London. - There was a flicker of light in Remus eyes that made Draco start to feel excited.
- Then I can't wait! - Draco reaches over to start eating his breakfast, earning a big warm grin from Remus.
They end up spending most of the day together, playing exploding snap and some other muggle card game that made Draco groan more than once.
In the late evening Harry comes in, looking fully guilty.
- I'll leave you two to be. See you in the morning, Draco. - Remus smiled at him, brushing away a lock of Draco's hair from his eyes before going away.
There was a heavy silence setting over them so Draco just sighed.
- Don't feel so guilty. I deserved it. -
- No, you didn't. I feel like a complete arse. Sirius was so angry with me. - Harry let his head hang low.
- I'm sure that you didn't mean to break my collarbone but just push me away. So all okay. Come and help me finish this enormous dinner. There's no way that I can eat it all by myself. They have stuffed me so full today and if I haven't eaten in months. - Draco grabbed Harry's hand and pulled him down next to him.
- I am really sorry, Draco. I didn't mean it and I was just so angry that you thought that I didn't want to be friends with you and I just… - Harry sighed, running a hand through his hair. - I'm sorry! -
There were tears shining in his eyes now so Draco just squeezed his hand before pushing the dinner tray closer to Harry and starting to eat himself.
Draco spent the night still in the hospital wing, getting out only after eating breakfast.
He slowly made his way up to Lupin's chambers, knocking softly before stepping into.
Remus was sitting on the couch, looking like he had just rolled out of bed. His hair was sticking up, his eyes still not completely open. He was wearing comfortable and worn out joggers and a big sweater that had holes in the sleeves,his feet bare and propped under himself. He was holding a cup of steaming tea in his hands, taking a small sip, looking like he could fall back asleep every passing second.
- Did I come too early? - Draco stands still by the door but Remus just shook his head and nodded toward the already waiting cup of tea for Draco.
Draco crossed the path in a couple steps, sinking into a comfortable armchair, taking a sip of delicious tea and closing his own eyes, simply enjoying the quiet moment.
They stayed like that till their cups were empty and Remus finally seemed to be fully awake.
- Sorry, had late night looking through all the essays. - Remus yawned and stretched before smiling lazily at Draco.
- Oh, I can only imagine what a nightmare that can be. - Draco popped a piece of cookie in his mouth.
Remus just laughed.
- You have no idea what some come up with. - Remus shook his head before getting fully up and stepping to the floo, dropping some floo powder in the flames turning them green. - Get ready for your surprise. And don't forget to say thanks to Sirius, this is all him, not me. -
Remus smiled warmly at Draco before turning back towards floo and calling out address, sticking his head inside. Just moments after he pulled back, getting back up and stepping back but the flames roared again and a figure stepped out.
Draco pushed himself up at once, rushing forward, his heart skipping beat after beat, he crushed against the person, tears already stinging his eyes, his arms locking around their neck.
- Hush, hush. No need for such drama. - Alec wrapped his arms around Draco tightly, pressing his face against Draco's hair.
- Alec… - Draco choked out, pressing his own face against Alec's neck and breathing in his scent, tears already escaping his closed eyelids.
Alec just holds him like that, not letting go even for a second.
With every breath Draco calmed down more till the tears finally stopped and looked up at Alec who didn't look so great himself.
- What happened to your hair? - Draco asked in disbelief, running a hand slowly through Alec's much shorter hair.
- Long story. - Alec sighed, finally letting go of Draco and sitting down. - In short,were drinking with Sirius and then he got a fantastic idea of doing a makeover over my sorry ass. So yeah, not the best idea to do while being drunk. But at that moment it was fun. -
- Why were you drinking with Sirius? Again. - Draco furrowed his brows, sitting down himself facing Alec who looked way too tired.
And was that jealousy nibbling at his ribs once again or simply hotness from tea?
- Sirius is such an idiot. - Remus grooned. - Anyway, I'll be over there, making sure that he can find the hangover potion while you talk everything out. See you in a bit. -
And with that Remus was gone.
They stayed silent for a moment longer and then Alec sighed, sliding a hand over his face.
- Listen, the way I acted, it wasn't right. I got pissed but listen, if you want to date Harry, then go on. I'm sorry for that way I acted and I fully support you. - Alec hold his eyes closed but it still looked like the words pained him.
- Alec… -
- No, Draco. - Alec opened his eyes and looked over at Draco, they seemed weirdly empty. - He's your age and you have been pinning for him since what? First year or something. It would be only reasonable for you both to finally get together. I won't stand in the way, I'm still your friend even while I know that Harry really dislikes me, but you don't need to feel guilty for wanting him, okay? -
These words come out in a weird rush and Draco felt like he was drowning, it was like being stunned and yet again still being able to react but as if his mind wanted to escape the reality.
Alec just sighed again, turning away and standing up, ready to go.
Draco just sits there frozen.
He knew that he should do something, get up and say something or at least grab Alec's hand but he just couldn't get his body to move or his mouth to open.
Alec looked down at him one more time, (and were these tears in his eyes?), before shaking his head and stepping through the floo, leaving Draco feeling frozen from inside out.
Author note. This come out short and I wasn't planning on it being like that, I originally planned to include christams in this one too but the part on which it ended just felt like a really good way how to end this chapter, so yeah. Thank you so much for reading! Also, I hope that there weren't too many mistakes!