Rebekah

"Well don't you think it's time? I mean we've been here over a month Nik," I urge my brother.

"He won't exactly fit in here. It's not like we can just catch Finn up," Nik responds. His continuous denial of my wish is infuriating.

The longer Finn stays in the coffin, the more guilt I feel. I've always felt guilty. Guilty for living while my brothers rot away in a coffin. And now, he acts like our family is full. Like we don't need him. But Finn, no matter how boring and emotionless, is one of us. Despite his deep regret for becoming an original vampire. He is still our brother. He deserves to be undaggered.

"I'm done with this argument. Go away sister!" he commands me. Alright, now I'm livid.

"You promised Nik," I beg him.

I know I could always walk down to the cellar and remove the dagger from Finn's chest myself. Yet I know Nik's reaction will be unprecedented. In order to free Finn, I must get my impulsive and begrudging brother's permission... That's not exactly a simple task.

"Not now Rebekah," and with Nik's final words I storm out of the office. I'm tired of it. My brother's control. Yet I always go along with it. His crazy decisions and atrocities. The devastation he leaves in his path. But what could I do? I'm just the devoted little sister who loves to easily.

I step harder, the pressure in my feet make my anger apparent. I speed to my room and slam the door shut.

Releasing a big sigh, I fall into my bed. And think.

Sometimes I feel a little uncomfortable with who I am and the choices I made. Like I don't belong in this world. I'm out of place. This is impossible because after 1000 years I would think I would learn to fit in. It's clear why. I have never been able to be myself. I've been Nik or Elijah or Kol's little sister. Never Rebekah Mikaelson, the beautiful, smart, and galant girl who lost her mother too young. And has never been able to recover.

Sometimes I wish people saw me as a girl. Just a girl. Nice or dorky or sophisticated. But I have become the monster that has controlled me. Look at Elena, I have condemned her for loving a man that I once have. Because I was jealous. That's not fair to her. I tell Nik that I cannot help who I fall in love with yet I immediately loathe her for the same thing. It is hypocritical.

But I want to get to know Elena. I think if I did, we could actually be friends. Honestly, I've never had a friend before. Like a real friend. I've had my psychotic brothers and that's it. It is impossible for me to get close to anyone. Another girl isn't horrible. We could share clothes and gossip about boys. Even if the boys she wants to talk about makes me incredibly uncomfortable.

I just lay in my bed for hours.

Then, I hear loud yelling voices coming from downstairs. Elijah and Elena are home and I don't think their time in the town went very well.