Sorry for such a delay in updating this story but I had some issues with my beta as they got busy with other stuff, and I didn't have help then lost my thoughts on where I was going with the story. Please enjoy and let me know how it goes.
Emily keeps ignoring her phone.
"You should really answer that." JJ says as the two sit and just watch some TV neither one is paying any attention to what is really on the screen.
"It's Clyde he can wait." Emily says as she see's Clyde's name flash up on her screen she would turn it onto silent but she doesn't' want to mess a phone call form Hotch or anyone else important.
"You ignoring him? that isn't like you Em." Em hears the surprise in JJ's voice that she is ignoring Clyde's phone calls.
"He is why things are like they are with Aaron and I. All the phone call will be about is him trying to remind me it was my idea not his, which is bullshit."
"Turn it off then?" JJ's asks her.
"I can't what if Aaron rings to change his mind about coming over, or someone else rings who is important." JJ hears her worry about Hotch not turning up, she ignores the fact Emily has called him Aaron and not Hotch, but after what she learnt in Rossi's office, Aaron really isn't all that far fetched.
Emily's phone goes off again and a different name shows up, JJ notices a small smile come across her friend's face before she witnesses Emily getting up to answer the phone.
"Where's Emily?" Rossi asks her as he comes into the lounge and gives JJ a small peak on the lips.
"She had a phone call come through and so she headed off to her room to talk, well I presume she went to her room. I didn't follow as I wanted her to feel like this is her home and that I trust her, plus not being noisy as well." JJ says to Hotch.
"Hotch is running late, he's waiting on the locksmith to turn up to his place, he's changing his locks."
"Why is that?"
"He tried to dumb Beth, but she is not taking it that well, and refusing to believe him right now, he found her at his place, he said he has told her it's over, explained why but Beth is being Beth, and trying to ask him to reduce his hours, and everything else."
"Sounds like she is trying to do a Hayley on him."
"Yep, so he is changing the locks so she can't get in. He also said Clyde has rung him wanting to know where Emily is, and asked us not to tell him."
"Emily has been ignoring his calls. She has told me all about what happened and what he has done, so I know what has happened between the two, well not all the details but she went into most things. So if he rings I won't be giving him any information whatsoever, unless it is to sink him in a very big fat hole. Do you need something to eat?" JJ asks, deciding to change the subject, as she knows her and Emily ate dinner some time ago but she has no idea if Rossi has had anything to eat.
"It's ok bella, I'll sort something out for myself, Aaron will need something and I know just what will get him to eat, I noticed today he didn't eat at all, did Emily eat tonight?" He asks as the two are now in the kitchen as he gets to work on making up some food for him and Aaron.
"Yes we ordered take out and she did eat, not a huge amount, but something is better than nothing, the leftovers are in the fridge." Comes from JJ, as Rossie goes and gives her a hug, everything that is going on with Aaron and Emily, is making him realize just how lucky he is right now, he holds on to JJ firmly not to tight, and lays a few gentle kisses on her head, she understands what he saying and thinking and she is the same, she looks up to him and they share a kiss, that says so much to each other.
"How is Henry tonight?" He asks her wanting to know how his step son is doing, knowing now that he is never letting JJ go, knowing that taking her on means taking Henry on and being a father figure to him, He knows that Henry no longer has a father, the job taking Will from not just Henry but JJ as well, and it hurt watching JJ struggle with what to do re Will, he stepped in and gave her a shoulder to cry on, in the end she made the choice to allow him to go in peace. Dave goes about cooking up a meal for Aaron and himself.
"Aaron you ok?" Dave asks when he sees the pale drawn out face of Aaron when he comes into the kitchen having just arrived. Aaron just shakes his head at him.
"Beth being a pain is she?"
"She hasn't stopped ringing for the last fifteen minutes of my drive, I haven't answered but she just keeps ringing and ringing a couple of times she has left a message, but haven't bothered with them. Pleased I changed the locks and by the way here is a copy of my new key." He says as he passes a key over to Rossi as he finishes up serving them dinner, the smell of Rossi's cooking makes him feel hungry, he didn't realize until now that he hadn't eaten all day, par breakfast this morning. Rossi also gets the I just don't want to talk about this right now, from Aaron tone of voice.
The two sit and eat food and just as Aaron is about to finish he feels a pair of arms wrap around him from behind, he knows straight away who's arm's they are and he moves to hug Emily. Rossi takes leave from the kitchen leaving the two to be by themselves.
"She wasn't a mistake Aaron, please realize that, I never thought of her as a mistake, I just wish things back then were different. I should have done things differently."
"You did what you were told to do Emily."
"And it stopped us from being a family, and I'm sorry I left for England, I couldn't stand being here anymore."
"It's not your fault for leaving, I should have been more honest with you over some things, but I was scared." he says to her as the two move off to where Emily has been sleeping in Rossi house.
"When talking to Jack today I realized I have neglected him, I didn't realize it has been months since I last spoke to him, even longer since I last saw him, he is just a child and doesn't understand what we do, he just misses me for me. I didn't realize just how much joy he brings to me until now." She says as the two curl up on the bed holding each other.
"You sort of did take over being a motherly figure to him after Haley passed. I didn't stop it either to be honest it gave me a reason to have you around more than just at work, if Jack wanted you there I wasn't going to say no to him, I knew you were missing out on being a mum so I thought why not allow her to be a mum to Jack, get to experience the joys that I get with having him as mine, I knew he wasn't your blood but I knew you would care for him like he was your own, I knew you had a soft spot for him." Aaron says to her.
"He is a great kid, how can you not love him." She says to him, she wants to say more but she stops herself from saying it.
"I'm sorry about my temper In Rossi's office last night it wasn't called for." He says to her after they had laid there for about fifteen minutes in silence. "I know my temper can be an issue and I know I need to learn to control it better than I did."
"I thought you controlled it pretty well, I could see the struggle on your face, and your remorse at times as well. It wasn't an easy talk to do last night, emotions ran high on both our fronts. We both properly, no I know I said some things in the heat of the moment that I regretted saying afterwards, something could have been explained so much better as well and I know its no excuse but my emotions were playing on me a lot last night, then us talking on top didn't help." He knows he said a few things he regrets, but most of all he regret his temper coming out, but he decides he needs to address something first with Emily, so that then no matter where tonight goes, then at least that is off his chest and she knows where things are with Beth and him, so she wouldn't feel bad about spending time with him. I love her, she deserves to know what I have done so that I can lay here with her and not feel bad, and also so she doesn't feel bad about it. Our emotions will be running high and the last time we were like this with each other was when I told her about our little girl being missing.
"I ended it with Beth tonight but she hasn't taken it well, she is in fact refusing to accept the relationship is over, I have changed the locks on my apartment, tomorrow I'll give you a copy of the new key, Dave has one right now, the other one you can throw out as it no longer works."
"Do you think she will cause problems?" I'll protect him to the end of the earth and back again from the likes or her, he doesn't deserve to be cheated on again, he also doesn't deserve to be lied to as well, he deserves to be loved, be happy, not have to second guess what is going on around him, and most of all trust his partner. Something he properly will never be able to do with me not after all this is over with.
"I am pretty sure she will, she was going through photos of us when you had Isabella, she felt like she had a right to know about her, she wants me to cut my hours spend more time with her, but she didn't seem to care that I knew she has been up to more with Joel than us cuddling on the couch, Garica has proof of her affair with her co worker. And a few other things as well that she has dug up for me on her. You being here has nothing to do with me ending it I was planning on doing it this weekend, but the case changed those plans. In fact I have been trying to do it for a good month or so but she has not been free or cancels at the last minute, so I decided when I saw her going through our personal stuff that it was time to do it now, and not to wait any longer. Though I did have a rather short conversation with Clyde tonight, asking if I knew where you were, he lied to me and I caught him out. Though his timing was good cause it got Beth out of my apartment as she wouldn't leave and she nearly called you a bitch, that is the only good thing I can say about Clyde right now." he says to her his hand gentle rubbing up and down her back in his normal comforting gesture, something he has always done when the two would be curled up together, he was doing the same thing in his office as well.
"Yea he has been blowing up my phone as well, I've been ignoring him because I honestly have no idea what to say to him, plus first I wanted to talk things out with you. After Jess rung I switched my phone off as I heard you arrive, I only got off the phone to her about five minutes before I came out to see you."
"That is a late one for Jack." he says, thinking about the time it was when he got here. And if Emily was up that late talking to him, he knows he is going to be super tired tomorrow for Jess and her family.
"I spoke with Jack, help Jess get him into bed, he wanted me to tell him a story so I did then Jess and I spoke for some time afterwards." She knows she needs to tell him soon about what she spoke to Jess about, she knows he is going to be so bloody angry with her for doing it, but he is right they can't hide this any longer.
The two lay there they both want to talk but neither is sure what to say to the other right now. They know they have to talk about things.
"I didn't mean for it to sound like I thought she was a mistake Aaron, and I'm sorry for throwing Haley at you last night. Being demanded back here yesterday by Rossi, then finding out that the team where now looking for her, I was angry I thought Rossi had gone against my request to not investigate her disappearance with the team. I was already emotional beforehand, then that just tipped me over, then I panicked, no one really knows what I have done before Aaron, I have this massive past that I can't even talk about to anyone not even you, even though I want to talk to you I can't. Then there was informing them that we have known each other a lot longer than most of them know, Does Rossi know how long we have truly known each other?" She asks him.
"He knows I worked for your mother, and that we knew each other, but he doesn't know about us being together back then."
"You mean our affair?" She says to him.
"It was never an affair as far as I'm concerned Em, yes we kept it quiet but that was so your mum never found out, it wasn't because I didn't care about you or want to show you off, I wasn't with Hayley at that time either, if you look back on it now we properly spent just as much time apart as we did together."
"Yea then mum shipped me off somewhere then to Yale and that was the end of it."
"Your mother and I have never seen eye to eye, so it didn't surprise me when you were suddenly gone and I was unable to reach you and then I was moved elsewhere, I think she figured it out in the end."
"I didn't mean to lie to you, there are just things I can't talk about."
"I understand that, just last night finding out that you were working as in more than what I thought back then, that you didn't want to acknowledge what we once were to each other, to everyone par Rossi, then finding out there is far more to us than what they thought they knew."
"I didn't want my band aid taken off my wounds. I knew telling them would lead to my wound bleeding again, bringing everything back to the surface, making it harder to get through this time of year. Then there would be loads of questions re what I was doing back then, with you and when she went missing where was I working, was I involved, how can I prove I wasn't involved, all that bullshit that goes on. I just didn't want to go through all that, I didn't want to bring up the past. The interview this morning was bad enough to deal with, without telling them, we have put them through so much Aaron, I didn't know how well they could handle it, handle us hiding another major secret from them again. They are going to at some stage stop trusting both of us, we keep hiding so much from them."
"I'm not ashamed about our past Emily, and neither should you. We did nothing wrong at all back then, there was no rule breaking, we fell in love nothing wrong about that at all. Just learning there was far more involved than what I knew about us back then and what you were doing hurt last night, hurt that you couldn't trust me, I would never of told anyone at all about it, it would of been nice to know even if it was when you came to work for the BAU, or when she went missing that there was more that I didn't know, even just saying Aaron, there is information I can't tell you about what I was really doing at that time, but nothing until know sixteen years later to find out this information, doesn't make it at all easy to deal with. Then you refused to tell the team, then you said the mistake I made, I know I jumped to it, when you said my mistake, meaning having her, and being pregnant. I was struggling too. I know we have hidden a lot from the team Em, and if they can't trust us then fine they can go elsewhere and work. It is our private life and they do not have a say in that, in what we mean to each other, that for us we are more than just co workers no matter how much we try to keep our emotions and feelings in check, we will always be more than just that to each other. So what they just found out now we have a child together, had she not been taken they would never have known about her at all, she would still be our secret, that only Rossi knew about. They can't cause us grief over this cause I know if they do Rossi will be coming down on them like a tonne of bricks, if the look he gave Morgan is anything to go by." He says to her. He knows he still loves her, that she is the love of his life, and nothing is ever going to change that no matter who he is with, it is now whether they can fix what is broken between them or not now.
Somehow during their talk Emily hand has ended up underneath his shirt and is gently caressing his kin on his tummy, he remembers her doing this alot when they were together years ago, how she could lay there for hours doing this. How comforting and how grounding it is for him. He wants her to stop because it does other things to him, but right now having her feel comfortable enough to do this to him is more important.
"You do know we will need to inform Jessica about all of this." He says to her knowing this isn't going to go down well with her, and he feels her stiffen within his hold, which he had expected from her, he is not gearing up for more of a fight from her. She goes to move and he lets her move away from him, he will never hold her against her will unless it was for her own safety.
"I already told her." Emily faintly says her back facing Aaron. She is too scared to look at him worried like hell he is going to yell and scream at her for telling Jessica, telling her without talking to him first about it. She feels the bed move as Aaron moves and gets up off the bed he starts to pace the bedroom.
Aaron is trying to figure out how to react, on one hand he wants to yell at her for doing it without talking to him, without them both being on the line to tell Jessica at the same time, so that he can answer any questions she has from him, but on the other he is like at least she felt comfortable enough to tell her about it, and do it without me saying something to her about telling her. He knows yelling at her isn't going to help solve anything right now.
"Aaron?" Emily faintly asks him, having watched him pacing, seeing so many emotions running over his face. She sees the fight he is mentally having with himself.