Chapter 10 - What Hurts the most.
When Sam arrived at the hangar, the last people were boarding the plane. She saw Ben Daimio at the entrance.
- I've been waiting to properly meet you, Miss Taylor. - he seemed a very normal nice looking guy, besides the nasty scar on his face.
- Well, Mr. Daimio, I'm glad we could meet under more mundane circumstances this time. - she said shaking his hand.
- I hope you're well. I'm sorry for what happened.
- You should not apologize, Mr. Daimio. After all, you saved my life. Thank you.
- And you saved mine. In this case, call me Ben.
- And I'm Sam. - she smiled at him.
Sam looked around for a place to seat. What she really wanted was to seat next to Abe, rest her head against his shoulder and have some sleep in his calming presence. But they didn't discuss what had happened last night, so she didn't have the courage to do that. She sat on the opposite side next to Ben Daimio.
- So, are you staying in Jersey? - she continued to Daimio
- No, I'm getting back to Washington. I have some things to arrange.
- Well, if you need help controlling it someday, we can try something. You just find me.
Ben seemed touched.
- Thank you. So much.
She smiled and sat back for the take off. She dozed off, and when she opened her eyes Ben wasn't next to her anymore. Abe was still in the same seat reading. Hellboy and some agents were playing poker on a wooden crate.
She would doze off and wake up when her head tumbled. Abe was watching her. She seemed exhausted and very uncomfortable on her seat. Abe noticed that every time she'd wake up scared, the plane would shake a little. She finally found a position where her head were more stable. It took half an hour. She tossed around. Abe looked up from his book. She was having a nightmare. But he couldn't see inside her head. She was getting stronger with her shields. He took his gloves off, without the other guys noticing, and tried to read her better. He saw she was dreaming about yesterday. She was dizzy, lost and naked at a forest. She was on her back, sticks and leaves scratching her back. Animals attacking her and Hassan's face over her.
That time, when she jumped awake, the plane shook hard in a great turbulence. The sky was clear. All the playing cards flew out of the crate, and the men cursed. Abe's book fell off his hand. Sam sighed and put her head down on her hands, trying to shake the dream away.
Abe stood up and picked up his book. He left the book in his seat and crossed to her. He sat next to her and touched her shoulder. She looked up at him.
- I'll keep the dreams away.
- Thanks.
She leaned back in his shoulder and fell back to asleep.
A week later at the library.
Sam stood up suddenly and angrily from the spot she was laying down with her head on Abe's lap.
- It's useless. I can't do it.
They were practicing her control on her powers. Abe would concentrate in pushing into her mind while she was concentrating in something else. Today they were using books. She had to find the correct titles and lift them up while not letting him in. Which was very hard. He was much stronger than her in the psychic department and had much more control as well. He'd always slip in. And she could only hope he didn't see anything embarrassing.
She paced around.
- You are getting better. - he said calmly from his spot in the sofa from which he didn't move.
- Yeah? How many seconds are you taking to get in? Ten? - she asked bothered.
- Twelve. - he said calmly. - but it's a long way from five. - that was her record one week prior.
She growled and walked away. They've been at this all week and her head hurt.
- I know it's not easy. But that's what practice is for. - he said, watching her frustration.
- For you, it certainly is.
She had also been practicing getting inside his mind. Or blocking thoughts he would broadcast to her. She couldn't do it. Not once.
- Ok. It's your turn now. - he said uncrossing his legs.
She sat down in his previous position and he laid his head in her lap. He insisted being relaxed helped both of them to concentrate. She put her hands to his temples and pushed in. As always, she'd only found darkness. In his mind, it was like she was swimming in black tunnels. She tried harder, but carefully not to hurt him. It happened before when she was frustrated. She would pushed so hard that would hurt his mind and even then, she saw nothing.
- You know, the more you get angry the least you can concentrate. - he said calmly. - you are focused on your frustrations and failure, not on me. Relax. Breath in and breath out.
She did it, but the darkness didn't changed. She felt more relaxed though.
- Maybe you could loose your barriers a little bit. - she said, her kept eyes close. - You're too strong.
- If I do that, what's the point?
- I don't know. - she sighed and let go of him, leaning back on the sofa.
He got up.
- Maybe we should swap again. - he said.
- Ok. - she said and laid back down.
- Let's not use the books this time. Just relax and try to keep me from your mind.
She sighed and pouted.
- You know that if you don't hold back I can't keep you out.
- Maybe don't think about keeping me out. Do it more like, guiding me to where you want, or better yet, far from where you don't want me. It's what I do. I don't keep you out of my mind exactly. I let you in, but put you inside a place and keep you there.
- A dark tunnel?
- Yes. If you can't keep me out. Try to guide me to a place inside your mind. Conjure a place you know well.
- Like the library?
- No. Too complex. A simpler place. Like a blank white room. You keep me there and don't let me out.
- Ok.
She concentrated on his advice.
- Where am I?- he asked after a while.
- Is my childhood bedroom.
- That's good. Now imagine it all empty. All the doors are locked, so is the window. That's good. See, if you can't keep an enemy from inside, put him where you want. It's your mind after all.
Sam opened her eyes and looked up at him. The back of her head was hurting a little. She stared at him, his eyes were closed and he was concentrating while touching her temples with his hands. They haven't talked about what happened in Africa. Neither kissed again for Sam's regret.
- You are getting nervous. Your heart is beating faster. - he said - concentrate.
But she couldn't concentrate anymore, not when her mind was going back to that day in the lodging room. She struggled to keep him inside that room, but the walls were getting blurry. If he pushed, the walls would fall, and he would see them in that room, kissing in her memory. She knew that and got even more nervous.
He didn't pushed though.
- You're walls are crumbling, Sam. Hold back. Keep them up.
I can't concentrate while you're so close.
She thought, but since he was inside her mind he could hear it all. Suddenly, he lost the thin balance he was trying to keep. The walls on her mind broke and exploded like glass.
And they were at the library. On the floor. Naked. She was on top of him. They were kissing passionately while she moved sensualy on him and he held her by the hips. Damn!
She panicked. Suddenly, everything exploded again. In a bright strong light. She pushed against him, throwing him off her mind. They were deeply connected so she felt a flash of pain.
Sam was underwater. There were frogs everywhere. A sea of frogs. A plague of frogs. They bumped against her in the water, bringing her anguish and disgust. She concentrated and swam away easily. Out of the cloud of frogs in the water. She saw a tunnel way down, and went to it. In one second she was there. It was so easy to swim here. There was a light inside the tunnel, it came from a being. A being she couldn't explain. Then another flash of pain and she was inside a cylindrical tank. Needles and shocks probed her body. She cried out and drowned. Another flash of pain. She was upstairs in the library, her eyes were seeing everything very clear and vibrant. She saw a girl in the library. The girl was blond and beautiful. She was reading a book. She wanted to kiss that girl. Heart beating fast. Another flash of pain came, but this time it didn't go away. She hold her head in her hands. If it didn't stop she would die. She felt her brain would explode. And it did.
She opened her eyes and she was laying on the library floor. Her cheek to the carpet floor. She knew this was the reality because of the excruciating pain in her head. Her body was numb, slowly returning to feel. She turned her head and saw Abe. He was next to his tank, holding his head in pain moaning. She was trying to get to him, but her body wouldn't move. She noticed his pain was strong, and that took her out of her stupor. She ran to him.
- Abraham? Are you all right?
He didn't respond. He was shaking and pushing against his head. She didn't know what was happening. Should I see in his mind? She knew it all started like this, but she had to take him out of it. She reached for his hands and he pushed her away, with all the strength he had. She fell back on her wrist and stared at him with big eyes. Tears formed in her eyes. Her arm burned.
The library doors flew open, Hellboy and some agents came in. HB rushed to Abe, he looked like he was having a seizure.
- What is going on with him? - HB asked her.
- I don't know. - Sam answered crying.
- Let's take him to the med tank.
Hellboy and the agents were helping him up, while he still shook violently. Sam stood up, her wrist and head burning. She took a step forward to help them but Abe pushed her away. She frowned scared.
- STAY AWAY FROM ME. - he screamed.
They took him away fast. Sam stood in the library frozen with tears running down her cheeks.
After some minutes, she followed them. They were putting Abe inside his tank and he was fighting back. Hellboy had to help while they sedated him. Sam just waited outside the room, her hand to her mouth. She was impressed and hurt and heartbroken. What has she done?
When everything calmed down and the doctors arrived to examine him, Hellboy left the room to stand next to Sam in the observation window.
- What happened? - he asked. And lighted up a cigarette.
- I don't know. - she cried harder. - we were practicing and everything exploded and when I woke up he was like this.
The girl sobbed and Hellboy put his hand around her and hugged her. She put her head against his chest and sobbed harder. She knew Hellboy was blaming her, but he didn't say anything.
- Don't worry, squid. Everything is ok. - he said while patting her back. - you better kept some distance for a while though. - and he walked away returning to his' and Liz's room.
- Will he be ok? - she asked still sobbing.
- Yeah, he always does. He is a tough guy. You should have your wrist looked at. It's swelling.
She looked back at Abe in his medical tank and more tears rolled down. The doctors were putting needles on his arms and she felt it as if on hers. She rubbed them. She didn't know how long she stared until somebody led her away by the shoulders. She was taken to another medical room. They took an x-ray of her wrist. It wasn't broken, just sprained. A doctor put some bandage on, very tight and told her to keep it up while resting. He also gave her an ice pack to put on it.
Her feet took her away to her room, she couldn't go to the library. She laid down on her back and stared at the ceiling. She held her wrist against her chest, it was burning and pulsing. Her head was splitting. But her heart was what hurt the most. She cried hard until she felt numb, took a sleeping pill and blacked out.