A/N: So, here is the final chapter of this story! I know it hasn't been the happiest of stories but I hope you all have still enjoyed it. There is also a short epilogue after this chapter that I have posted at the same time so the story is now complete. This hasn't been the easiest story to write but all your lovely reviews have given me some much needed encouragement so thank you. Thank you to all of you for taking the time to read this story and for all your likes, follows and reviews.

Disclaimer: I don't own Bones

Brennan had been to collect Christine from Max and the three of them had enjoyed a takeout dinner that she had collected on her way home. Booth was under no illusion that his head was somehow miraculously fixed now he could remember Bones, but he had to admit that the relief he felt was almost overwhelming. He was also aware that things between them hadn't been miraculously fixed either. Bones had been quiet at dinner and Booth knew they had a lot to talk about.

Brennan could see that Booth was getting tired, so she insisted he rest while she put Christine to bed. Booth's body was sore. All the physical exertion of yesterday and today had taken its toll on him and he felt beat. He wanted nothing more than to go to bed, curl up next to Bones and sleep but there were things he needed to say to her, things he needed her to know.

He could hear she was about done upstairs so he got up and poured a glass of wine for her and grabbed a soda for himself. He would have loved a beer or some scotch, but alcohol was still off limits for him. He was just sitting back down on the couch when she appeared on the stairs. She smiled a small smile when she saw him and he patted the couch next to where he was sitting, encouraging her to join him.

The gesture was only small, but it reminded Brennan that her Booth appeared to be back in mind as well as body. However, today had been extraordinarily stressful for her and she still felt like she couldn't relax. She had spent the last couple of months in figurative hell and even though things felt so much better now that Booth could remember her, she wasn't sure she could open up to him again, that she could open herself up to the potential for so much pain again.

She hesitantly made her way over to the couch and sat down next to him. She picked up the glass of wine and took a sip. When she placed the glass back down on the coffee table, Booth grabbed her hand and wound his fingers through hers. He could sense something was wrong. He had expected her to look as happy as he felt, but instead of happy, she looked anxious. After they had made love this afternoon, she had looked the happiest he had seen her since he woke up in the hospital but now, the look on her face made his heart to beat faster with dread. Had she decided she wanted to leave him anyway? Had too much damage been done?

"Bones?" Her gaze had dropped to their joined hands and upon hearing him speak, she looked up at him. "Are you ok? You were really quiet at dinner and you seem, I dunno, a little out of sorts." He hoped he was reading her wrong, but when he said it, a small rueful smile appeared on her lips, telling him he was correct.

Brennan had almost forgotten how good he was at reading her and it seemed his ability to do that had returned along with his memories. She still struggled to identify her emotions sometimes but that wasn't the issue now. She was scared and she knew it. She had admitted to Sweets she was scared and now she needed to admit it to Booth. She looked down at their hands again, enjoying the feel of his hand holding hers. His hands always seemed to be warm and she marvelled at how strong he was and how gentle he was despite that. She looked up at his warm brown eyes again and saw what she perceived to be concern in them.

She took a deep breath to steady herself and shook her head. "I'm not ok, Booth. I'm… scared."

Booth wasn't sure he understood. What was she scared of? "Why, Bones? Why are you scared?"

"I'm scared of losing you and I'm afraid I won't be able to endure the pain if something like this happens again."

Booth tightened his grip on her hand "You're not gonna lose me, Bones"

"We don't know that Booth. Look at what happened to you. We didn't know that was going to happen and yet it did, and I don't know if I can endure it again."

Booth paused a moment as he processed what she had just said, trying to read between the lines hoping she wasn't saying what he thought she was. "What are you saying, Bones?"

Brennan felt tears pooling in her eyes and her voice quivered as she spoke "I don't know Booth. It's just, these last couple of months have been the hardest of my life and I don't know if I could survive something like this again."

Booth felt like his stomach had dropped to the floor. Now that he could remember all about her past, he knew that for her to say the past couple of months have been the worst of her life, worse even than being abandoned by her parents, meant that she has been in hell. Trying to quell the panic that was rising within him, he tried to reassure her. "It won't happen again, Bones. I mean, it was unlucky for it to even happen once. Lightning doesn't strike twice."

"No, that is incorrect Booth. Lightning can and often does strike in the same place repeatedly. Especially if the place in question is a tall or isolated object."

Booth felt himself smile involuntarily. He had missed her squinty talk. "I don't mean it literally Bones."

He shifted so he was closer to her and grabbed her other hand so he was now holding both. "Listen, you have to believe me Bones, I'm not going anywhere and I'm so sorry that I forgot you and what you meant to me."

Brennan shook her head "No, Booth you can't apologise for having amnesia. Your head injury and the subsequent neurological effects weren't your fault."

"Maybe not, but I can apologise for my behaviour since then. I should have made more effort to talk to you and I made assumptions about you and us that were completely wrong. I hurt you and I'm so sorry, I never, ever want to cause you pain. I love you. I have always loved you and if I'd have done things differently, maybe I would have realised it sooner."

"Booth…" Brennan felt tears stinging her eyes. Hearing his declarations of love had always had a profound effect on her but hearing him say it again now made that feeling even greater. "I Love you too. We have both made mistakes. I was so afraid to make a misstep, that something I said or did would hamper your recovery. I kept thinking about how confused you were when you woke from the coma after the operation to remove your brain tumour. I had caused some of that confusion by reading you that story as I wrote it and I wanted to avoid making the same mistake again. But I know now it was irrational. I even went to see Sweets, and he told me that I already knew the answer, that I could trust myself. But the fear of me or my actions being the reason I lost you was clouding my mind. I have never been so scared about anything."

A few stray tears rolled down her cheeks and Booth reached up to brush them away before taking her hand again.

"I was scared too, Bones. Sweets told me that fear was the reason for my amnesia. He said that I love you so much that when I woke up and could only remember you rejecting me, I was so scared of losing you, that I unconsciously chose to block you out of my mind instead, to protect myself."

Brennan's brows knitted together in confusion. He had never told her about what he could remember of her and she wanted to know which memory had caused him so much pain. "What memory was this? You never told me you remembered anything." She had tried to keep a neutral voice, but her words still came out sounding like an accusation.

Booth dropped his eyes to his lap, ashamed of how he had kept everything from her. He looked up again to see her waiting patiently for his response. "The only thing I could remember of you was our first case together. Specifically, when you told me you hated me, slapped me and said you'd never work with me again."

Brennan blinked as she processed what he'd just said. "I suppose I understand why that memory would distress you. But you didn't love me then."

Booth laughed. "Haven't you been listening to what I've been saying Bones? I've always loved you, from that very first moment. True, you irritated me a lot when we first met and I think that masked it at times, but I knew. Deep inside, I knew. That is why I'm mad at myself that I didn't recognise that sooner. If I had, maybe I could have saved you a lot of pain."

Brennan leaned in and brushed her lips against his. She realised that somehow, she had known he still loved her even though he couldn't remember her. It was what had kept her from running. She knew that if she had run, it would have hurt him as well as her. She loves him and knew she could never love anyone else. No matter how big the possibility of losing him and the subsequent pain it would cause, there would be no way she could ever leave him voluntarily and not feel that pain. It would cause him the same pain and the last thing she ever wanted to do was hurt him.

Her kiss was unexpected, which worried Booth. Her words from earlier in the conversation about not being able to endure the pain if something happened to him were bothering him and he hoped the kiss wasn't a goodbye kiss. He leaned away and took her face in his hands. "Bones, you aren't leaving me, are you?"

"No, Booth. Why are you asking me that?"

"Because of what you said earlier about not being able to endure the pain again and then kissing me. It wasn't a goodbye kiss, was it?"

Brennan smiled and kissed him again briefly. "No, I'm not leaving you. I have realised the pain of voluntarily ending our marriage would not be any less than the pain of losing you in any other way."

Booth grinned at her then enveloped her in a huge hug before feeling his own unexpected tears of relief. He leaned away, a little embarrassed and wiped his eyes. Brennan smiled at him and wrapped her arms around him again, giving him her unspoken love and support.

Booth pulled away and grabbed his soda while Bones picked up her wine and snuggled next to him.

"I've been thinking, Bones. Maybe I should leave the FBI. I mean, you're right, we didn't know that what happened to me would happen and the only way to make sure something like that doesn't happen again would be to not put myself in the position where it could happen."

Brennan considered what he said for a few moments, would him leaving the FBI be what was best for him? For them both? Their partnership still meant a lot to her. Was she willing for him to give that up for her? "Did anyone ever tell you what happened to you, Booth? I know I didn't, but did Sweets tell you?"

Booth nodded as he picked at the label on the soda bottle. "Yeah, it was a kid who'd killed his father. He thought we were there to arrest him, so he fought his way past us to try to escape."

Brennan studied him as he fidgeted with the bottle in his hand. "It was an accident. He didn't intend to really hurt you, he just wanted to escape the consequences of his actions. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Considering the circumstances of that incident and knowing there's a possibility something like it could always happen again, do you regret it? Do you regret doing your job, catching murderers?"

Booth shook his head. "No." He knew what she was getting at. "I don't regret it. I only regret that it hurt you. Mentally and physically." He added remembering how she had a cast on her arm for a while and figuring she had sustained the injury in the same incident.

Brennan sighed. This was the dilemma. How to balance her fear of him getting hurt with the knowledge that it was part of who he is. When she had become his partner all those years ago and agreed to assist him with his cosmic balance sheet, she had never envisioned their lives would become so intertwined and complicated. Up until his head injury she had made good progress with making peace with the fact that there was always a possibility that loving him would cause her pain. But recently, she had begun to realise again that he had been correct when he had said that the benefits of being together are worth the risk. His injury and amnesia had made her doubt all that but when she thought back to how their life was before, she had never been so happy, and she knew she would do anything to get that back. However, despite her fear for him, she knew she could never ask him to give up his job unless it was his choice.

"It was my choice to go into the field with you Booth. It has always been my choice and even though I know you are there to protect me, I am aware that there are always risks. As do you. There will always be that risk that either of us could get hurt. But, catching murderers, saving people, making a difference in people's lives, it's what we do." She placed one hand on his chest, over his heart. "It's a part of who you are, and I love who you are."

Booth placed his hand over hers on his chest. "So… you don't think I should quit my job?"

"If you do, I think you should do it for the right reasons, not out of fear of hurting me if something happens to you. It needs to be your decision but whatever you decide, whether you quit or stay, I will support your decision. However, I actually think going back to work would be helpful for you as it will give you something to aim for with your recovery."

Booth considered what she said. He loved his job and the only reservation he'd had about returning was the worry that Bones wouldn't want him to. But she had just said she thought he should, so he was going to trust her decision. He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. "Ok, I'll aim to get back to work. If you go back to working at the lab as soon as possible."

Brennan pulled back from him, instantly feeling the hurt stinging from her assumption that he didn't want her around. "Why? Don't you want me here?" She asked hesitantly.

"Of course I want you here!" He pulled her back closer to him again, not able to bear having any space between them. "It's just I think it will be helpful for you. You need to work; you need it to keep that big brain of yours occupied and you won't be able to do that if you're at home. Besides, I've got a lot of work to do myself if I'm gonna get back to work. I need to work on my fitness for starters. My legs are still killing me after only walking yesterday and I need to get back to being able to run if I'm gonna get back in the field."

Brennan smiled and relaxed. She admitted to herself that she was missing her job and the focus and purpose it provided her. "All right, I'll speak to Cam in the morning to arrange my return."

"And I need to talk to Sweets again, see how far he thinks I am from being ready. I was gonna ask him today, but I ended up only talking about you." He said with a crooked smile

"Me?" Brennan asked, surprised that he had spent his whole session talking only about her.

"Yeah. I wanted him to tell me about you, about us. I had already worked out that I love you and I wanted to know how to stop hurting you even though I still couldn't remember you."

Brennan's breathing faltered slightly when Booth reminded her of how it was only a few hours ago that he had virtually no memories of her. "I think I should accompany you to some of your sessions, Booth."

"You do? Why?"

"Because, as we've discussed this evening, these past couple of months have been difficult, for both of us. I think we could benefit from discussing that with Sweets."

"But I thought you didn't believe in psychology?" Booth worried for a moment, concerned some of his recently retrieved memories were incorrect.

"I don't. I believe Psychology is a soft science. But that doesn't mean I can't see the benefit of it in certain situations." Brennan thought of how seeing Sweets yesterday helped her to feel better even if it was only briefly. She knew she needed to do whatever it took to make sure her and Booth stayed together.

"All right, if that's what you want." He leaned in to kiss her, feeling incredibly fortunate to have her as his wife. The kiss started to get heated and when they broke apart, they were both breathless. "Shall we continue this upstairs, Bones?" Booth said while taking the wine glass out of her hands so he could pull her closer unimpeded.

"Are you sure you're not too tired Booth? It's been a long day."

"It has, but I feel like showing my wife how much I love her."

Brennan smiled and stood up from the couch grabbing Booth's hands and pulling him up with her. "I find I would like to do the same."

Booth grinned then said "I still want those 30, 40 or 50 years. You know that, right?"

Brennan nodded then said, still smiling, "As do I, Booth."

Then he pulled her upstairs for them to demonstrate their love for each other so there was no longer any doubt.