Chapter 10: On the Precipice

It's decided that the weekend of the awarding ceremony will double as the Great Girl's Night before Amy leaves for Boston. All of them will be in the hotel well before the event. Amy may not be allowed during the program but she can definitely crash the after-party. Then the two days after will be all about pampering!

It's the eve of the ceremony. Her friends must be very busy preparing themselves, so Amy walked around to entertain herself.

"Dr. Fowler?" she didn't expect to hear that voice again.

"Hello Dr. Hillard," Amy greeted politely.

"Wow, what are the odds! I'd never thought I'd see you here!"

Amy wanted to say the same thing but what the hell. She's got to think about something that'd let her get a move on, fast!

"There's a big ceremony happening this evening, maybe Prof. Wilson can arrange for you to attend."

"Oh, that won't be necessary. I'm here with friends. We're spending the weekend…"

"No, really, Prof. Wilson can get you in. He's really influential, being one of the most generous patrons in the Scientific community and all."

Amy may have spent an afternoon with the old man, but she would have never known.

"See, here he comes! Prof. Wilson!"

"Look who's here! Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler, nice seeing you again," the old man kissed her cheeks.

"Nice seeing you, too Prof. Wilson."

"Well, it doesn't look like you've been taking my advice, child," his voice is gentle, yet chiding. "It's not good for the both of you."

Amy stared at him, not comprehending anything.

"Be at the event tonight, Dr. Fowler. I'll be waiting for you. Dr. Hillard, shall we go?"

The two men bid her goodbye but she stayed on the same spot long after they're gone.

Amy made sure her hair is in place before going down to the ballroom. She isn't sure how this dress fits the occasion but how it feels against her skin more than makes up for whatever it may lack. The heavy doors remained open and she can already hear someone speaking to the crowd.

Someone approached her and escorted her to her table. She didn't see where he came from but Prof. Wilson was already beside her when she turned.

"You look beautiful, Amy," he said, taking her hand.

"Thank you, Prof. Wilson. You're looking good yourself," she smiled, returning the compliment.

"You're just in time. They're just about to call Dr's. Cooper and Hofstadter for their award," the old man said, gesturing to the podium.

"I'm really happy for them," Amy couldn't have said more sincerely. She thought of approaching her friends' table the minute the two leave for the stage. "I'm gonna say hi to everyone in a bit."

The Professor just nodded and returned to his group.

It wasn't long before their names were called. While the two men were walking down towards the podium, Amy moved to greet her friends.

"Amy! I'm so happy you're here!" Penny's eyes were filled with delight and welcomed her with a hug. Bernie moved to kiss her cheeks. Emily did the same.

"A friend arranged for me to be here," she said, giving Raj and Howard a nod. She reached out to shake Vannessa's hand, too. "I'm glad to see you again."

"Likewise, Dr. Fowler," came the honeyed reply. "Sit with me."

The seat gave Amy the wide view of the place. It has to be Sheldon's seat. And said man and his best friend accepted their awards and moved to the mic to speak.

"Good evening," Amy didn't know how much she missed his voice until that moment. She thought she could listen to him all night.

Sheldon's eyes roamed the crowd and stopped at their table. A moment passed before he spoke again. His speech is full of pride and purpose where he expressed his dedication to Science and new discoveries. But most of all, it's spoken with so much gratitude and hope, and extending the credit of his work not only to those he worked with but also to those who inspire him the most.

He's looking at their table all throughout his speech. Amy couldn't be more proud and hurt at the same time. She could pretend all she wanted that he's speaking about her, but she knew better. The reminder is seated beside her, equally beaming with pride.

It's now Leonard's turn to speak. But try as she might, she couldn't get anything in her head. She felt like being here is just too much. She doubts she'll ever be ready to face Sheldon again.

The crowd ruptured in applause while Amy hastily bid everyone good night.

She's never walked away that fast in her entire life. She closed her door and grabbed the water bottle on sight. She moved to sit on the bed.

She's still out of breath and her heart's drumming furiously on her chest, but her mind remained blank. Amy closed her eyes, willing herself to calm down. 'Please slow down,' she pleaded, putting her hand above her heart. 'Please slow down.'

She tried a few deep breaths, but her heart refused to listen. She ran out to the balcony to feel the wind on her face. She took the nearest chair and she started to just breathe and breathe and breathe. It's exhausting to do just that so when the darkness came, she gladly embraced it.

There's an insistent tugging on her arm that she tried to push away. It came back, a bit stronger than before and with a voice that she'll know anywhere, "Amy, you'll catch a cold if you sleep out here."

Amy's mind is playing tricks on her again. She doesn't even want to open her eyes. But the voice is insistent and so concerned, "Amy, come inside."

She opened her eyes a bit and sure enough, there's Sheldon. Dream Sheldon more likely.

"Leave me alone," she said, turning away. The ocean's rumbling in the distance and wind's playing with her hair.

She waited for the vision to fade but it didn't. Instead there's this very real looking Sheldon in front of her, all dressed up like he was tonight. And there's even music coming out from the room, the same one they danced to during prom, and that night at the Victorian hall. It seems her brain is pulling all the stops. But maybe it's what she really wanted all along.

She smoothed her hands down on her dress and tried to straighten out the imaginary creases on her skirt. She then jumped out of the chair and grabbed his hand, pulling him inside. "Dance with me," she demanded. What could it hurt, this is going to be the very last time she's going to indulge herself with her delusions.

They stood at the center of the room, her disheveled in her dress and him, impeccable in his suit. But Amy's in her dream and she couldn't care less how they look like, as long as she's here with him.

If you should ever leave me, Well, life would still go on, believe me

She reached up so her hands met at his nape. She tugged him closer to herself. His arms went around her. Together they swayed to the beat.

The world could show nothing to me, So what good would living do me?

Amy peered at him, smiling like her eyes only could. And he returned it fully. Her heart's suddenly too full, threatening to overflow. His thumbs began to draw invisible lines on her lower back and when he pulled her closer, she went willingly, finally closing the gap. They danced like this for a while.

God only knows what I'd be without you

The song is in a loop, Amy realized. She'd be happy to dance with him all night, but even dreams must come to an end. She started to pull away but Sheldon didn't fully let her go.

"My feet are starting to hurt," she whispered.

"Then come to bed, Amy," he turned and walked towards the plush mattress in the room. He removed his shoes, his coat and his tie. He started to unbutton his shirt, too. "My Friday pyjamas are in my room. I'd get them, but I think I'd be just fine this time." His hands are now occupied with removing his trousers. He then folded all his clothing and put them on a nearby chair. He then grabbed one of the robes on the bed.

She's sure her mouth is hanging open. But all she can do is stand there and watch. "Come, I'll help you out of your dress," he beckoned her to come closer.

He came to her when she didn't move. He stood behind her and started gathering her hair on one side. His hands were warm when they landed at the top of her back.

"You nuzzled on my back for warmth that first night. And I enjoyed you being that close to me ever since…"

Is Dream Sheldon about to recount every moment they had together now?

"And I enjoy watching your head slide down the pillow when you sleep," he chuckled. "You'll turn away a moment, but then you'll turn right back and reach for me."

Amy stiffened. How could he possibly know that?

His hand traced the zip along her spine, "I worked with Prof. Wilson just so I can get into the places where you stayed during the tour. But I'm always glad to share the water bed with you."

Amy's beginning to realize she's on the edge of dreaming and reality. She tried to turn to face him but he kept her in place.

"I may have always come short to what you expected me to be. But I'd always want you for myself, even during the times I least deserve you."

The zip started giving way, and where the cold touch, his lips followed.

"You said you were giving back the dream of us being together. Well, I took that dream and made plans on it. And I intend for it to come true," he whispered on the skin of her shoulders.

"I know you're leaving for Boston," he sighed, pressing his fingers on her waist. They then pushed the dress down and it fell on the floor. "I wanted to go with you."

Amy mechanically steps out of the dress. She felt him take a step back as well, straining as he picked her dress up from the floor. "I went there a couple days. But then every application I put forth eventually got rejected. It's CalTech or nowhere, even with the backing of Prof. Wilson. I begged him to convince you to stay... He loved an Amy once, so I know he understands."

Sheldon then went around her, laid her dress carefully next to his clothes. He picked up the other robe on the bed and stood in front of her.

"But then, you told me we should stop," his hands started to fidget on the fabric, his voice laced with uncertainty.

She looked at him, his eyes searching her face. And she realized what he's waiting for. She lifted her arms sideways and he sighed in relief.

"I didn't know how to tell you," he said, getting her into the robe. He busied himself on her collar, "but it's always been you, Amy. Always."

This couldn't be real, Amy thought. But she knew she couldn't be dreaming of this as well. She needed a quick distraction, so she asked, "But how about Vannesa? I saw you and her that night, you went into the room together."

His breathing didn't even change. His fingers catching on the fabric so close to where her heart is, "You mean that night when we took a bath together?"

"That was real?" she gasped.

"I could've never dreamt any better," he said, pulling her robes together now.

"It was real?"

"Yes."

"All of it?"

"Yes... I've always been with you. I could never keep away," he said, closing even more into her space.

"In this universe, or in any other that exists out there, if there's one truth that shall apply to all, it is this: you and me belong together. There's no way to disprove it... Amy, if you want to be my girlfriend again, I really want to be your boyfriend."

"I really want that, too."

He licked his lips and swallowed, "Good, because I love you."

"I love you, too," Amy's smile can barely fit her face.

"Then come to bed."

END

AN: So many of you were already onto me the first few chapters. I'm so glad you're right. And keeping with tradition, the reunion song is still from The Beach Boys, 'God Only Knows What I'd Be Without You'. It's got John Legend, Cynthia Erivo and yMusic version now. But I enjoy the instrumental version by Blue Topaz Strings the most. Hope you give all of 'em a listen.

Thank you so much sticking with this story 'til the end.