Chapter Twelve

Darkest Night

When we set up camp that night, we filled in Leliana and Sten as to what I was. Sten was instantly distrustful about my need for blood. I expected that.

I sighed, "I can't take from an unwilling source – it is violent and painful for me to do so. Besides… you get sexual pleasure from the bite unless you ask otherwise. And you are not expected to give blood if you do not want. I have gone centuries between blood draws – the pain is manageable at this point, it really just means I don't have health issues pertaining to the sun and food if I 'eat' regularly."

"Speaking of that – I want you to make me your familiar," Daylen said. I snapped to look at him, "Are you nuts? Shit Daylen, you'd start having vivid dreams about sleeping with me and that is the last thing we need."

"Tara, listen – you need regular blood to battle the Blight and you said we get benefits too anyway. What would it take to convince you?"

I shook my head, "Daylen it's too risky. Yes, you would produce more blood as a Familiar so that you could feed me often, but you'd be more vulnerable to certain things… and you could end up being hunted if people knew you were connected to me and that I could always find you."

"Tara we can't sit around arguing this – you need blood, and I can do that for you."

I bit my lip and looked around the camp, "I… Alistair, I want your input on this; should I make Daylen my familiar?"

Everyone was confused, "What – why Alistair?" Lyna asked.

I sighed, "You know that he's the prince of Ferelden – Daylen is one of his subjects technically and… I will explain more about it at a later date. Alistair, will you…?"

He looked thoughtful, "I don't think I can make this choice, Tara – Daylen is offering it to you, first of all; second, I made a choice to doubt you before and ended up hurting you badly. This should be between the two of you."

Leliana spoke, "Can I feel what the bite is like?"

I flushed and cleared my throat, "Are you so eager to do that… here?"

"Why not – Sten needs to know how safe it is anyway?" she pointed out. I shrugged, "Remember that you asked for this, dear."

I walked over and gave a gentle kiss on her neck while I thought of the fact that this was the most blood I had received in millennia. Her head tipped back – I was behind her so that Sten could see what I was doing; he had come over to look.

I bit into her neck and she cried out – I only took my usual amount before clearing away the marks. Sten spoke, "You hardly bit her."

"That's all it takes for me – I don't take more than a mouthful at a time. I mean, I could take a whole pint – the human body had 9 of those worth of blood. If I took a pint, I would really only need to 'eat' once a month in truth – I only take a mouthful per month at the moment because it's the bare minimum I can survive on before I get hunger pains. Blood keeps me healthier than if I go without – I'd be in constant pain and have to eat regular food far more often because my blood doesn't produce natural sugar like other peoples… for… reasons I don't feel comfortable saying at the moment. There's also the pesky sun allergy and all that… those things weaken and debilitate me without blood."

"Whoa – you said the sun doesn't affect you," Daylen accused. I sighed, "As much. If I weren't what I am, then the sun could make me burst into flames and that'd be the end of it. I still get major sunburn after only a few minutes if I don't have a constant shield – draining my mana – while we walk when I have only bare minimum blood. If I were eating properly, so to speak, that would be unnecessary and I would not need to waste my magical power to keep a shield in place."

"Then make me your familiar," Daylen pressed. I shook my head, "No – you don't understand, Daylen. On occation, a bonding goes wrong – you'd turn instead of imprinting. The chance of that is higher if I ever have to give you blood; Blood is what provides Vampiric beings with their supernatural abilities, such as enhanced strength, speed, agility, senses, healing and on occation… shape shifting. But there is always a price to having power, Daylen! You'd be linked to me until one of us dies – you would never age, you would think of me sexually unless you were uninclined to women, and you'd become highly protective of me. To be my familiar, you would become attuned to me; producing blood more frequently when it is lost so you can feed me, gaining more stamina and an increased sexual appetite to sate your bonded if it is needed… some go crazy. You have no idea how much you are asking of me. The bond isn't exactly one-way."

Silence fell on the whole camp. Aedan said, "So… this is only something you would consider with a lover?"

I nodded firmly, "It's what the bond was meant for – keeping our lovers mortal. You could still be killed easily. Another thing was that Vampires once needed day-time protection since we could not venture out lest we risk death. If the familiar was not our lover, then they were close enough to it. That's what makes them go insane – if we cast them aside when they were once our whole world… if Daylen were completely gay, then it wouldn't be as much of an issue. He'd still have dreams about bedding me, but they'd be more nightmares in that case. The other thing it was meant for was gaining devoted followers and guards – you're less likely to kill the one you adore."

Alistair frowned, "That sounds like a blood mages thrall…"

I sat heavily at Lelianas' feet, "Considering this practice was called making 'thralls' you're not very far off. I can't do any magics that involve blood – this isn't considered magic. Honestly, if I could find a safe way to get rid of the damn curse, I would. But I will not trap any soul to the Cairn just to do so – I will suffer."

Sten nodded, "Honorable if true."

I snorted and bared my fangs at him, "You would consider me Basalit-An; if you only knew even a fraction of what I have done or been through. I am Ataashi – by soul and blood. One day soon, you will call me Kadan and Ashkaari. Do not doubt me or I will challenge you for questioning my honor."

He stilled and said, "I wish for proof of the claim of Ataashi."

I nodded and moved aside – confusing most of them. Alistair said, "Wait – what is this… Ataashi you speak of?"

"It means Glorious One – used in reference to dragons." I explained.

"Oh – so you're going to turn into a dragon," Morrigan looked interested. I nodded and she smirked, "I do wonder how you differ to my mother – carry on."

I shrugged and shape-shifted. I was quite large and red – my scales looked like they dripped blood in the light of the fire. My eyes in this form were a flaming, glowing gold – my claws were light-devouring black. I had that black color on the spikes along my spine and circling my neck too.

Sten nodded firmly, "That is your title then – Ataashi."

"Shit – I have too many titles," I grumbled as I turned back – the downside to shifting to dragon form was that when I turned back, I was wearing what the other dragons wore when they shifted.

I wore a black and red tube-top like bra made of metal and formed to my chest, baring my gut; I wore black and red 'under things' over sheer leggings that slipped under leg guards that matched. The thigh-high boots had silver and gold swirling details. The sheer red cloak attatched to black cloak-hooks on crimson shoulder-guards. The ¾ length gloves were crimson with black detailing. And to complete the look, I had a cute black moon-shaped circlet with rubies in it.

Alistair flushed bright red as I sat beside him as regally as I possibly could in the revealing outfit. Aedan coughed, "That is… not what you were wearing a moment ago…"

"No – this is my scale armor; all Dragon-flight women wear something similar coming out of Dragon Form; it is made from our shed scales and is equipped through some long-ago magic. The queen – also called the life-binder – wears gold and red, the Dreamer wears greens, the spell-weaver wears blues and whites, the timeless one wears bronze and black, and the Earth-Warder wears black and orange. Those are the 5 leaders of the Dragon-Flights; Red, Green, Blue, Bronze and Black. This happens every time I shift to my most current Dragon form, okay? I get that it's embarrassing to stare at… this, but you'll have to deal with it… it doesn't wear off for at least an hour, though I could keep it as is past that."

Lyna frowned, "It isn't embarrassing – the Dalish wear similar armors as scouts; hunters are the ones that cover fully."

"I meant… I meant the fat, Lyna; I've seen people wear worse than this – at least all my vulnerable bits are covered – but I weigh a bit and…"

Sten snorted, "Weight is not something you can always control, Ataashi – some gain and gain though they eat little and do as they should; some gain nothing though they eat as much as a Bas lord with no exercise."

"I don't gain or lose, actually – it stays like this. It simply gets harder if I get pregnant, but stays much the same since I hit puberty," I frowned. Daylen jumped in, "Wait – you should lose and gain during pregnancy; I remember reading about that…"

"Not me – I stay as I am. Alexstrasza says dragons are similar if they look as I do – though it is uncommon. Now; Aedan and Alistair get to hunt for food – please," I added. Alistair jumped up and looked at Aedan. I had picked my mate solely so he could get away from my state of dress; even if I were lovely to look at, he would be uncomfortable out this. I did not take that much to heart at least.

While we waited for them to return, I handed out gifts – approaching Sten first.

He glanced at it and I saw surprise flash though his eyes, "Why?"

I smiled, "You were quoting a passage from it when I was approaching you in Lothering. I thought you might like it."

"I am impressed. You have my thanks."

I sauntered up to Morrigan next. I handed her the doll and she looked at me in disbelief, "Why would I want this?"

"It looks remarkably like our Templar, no? You could use it as a voodoo doll."

She froze for a second before a sadistic grin lit her lips, "Indeed… this could be much fun to play with… I thank you."

I headed over to Leli as she began to prep dinner – as soon as the other two men were back, she'd be ready to cook.

"Leli, dear, I've something for you." I held out the lute and her eyes widened. "This is Orlesian made…" she breathed.

"It was one of the things I bought from Bodahn… I heard you talking about how you were a traveling minstrel – though yes, I already know the truth – and thought you might like it… I know you have such a lovely voice."

"You… you know the truth… then what do you believe of my vision?"

"I think it's true. You never would have sought us out without it and we do need you, sweetheart. I think everyone has something they are meant to do – even those we see as evil act in the way they were meant to. Arl Howe killed Aedans' family, but if he hadn't then Aedan wouldn't be here. Loghain abandon Cailan, but without that… well, I can't say for now."

"I feel a bit like a fraud, right now. You are a true seer, and here I am… only the one instance…"

"You don't want it, trust me. It's a curse and a gift wrapped in one. I can't change everything or I'll make it worse but I cannot stand by and allow certain things. I tried to save Cailan – he still died."

She flinched. "There are so many good things in the Makers world; how can I sit by…?"

I smiled, "You could not, and that is why you're here. The maker, just as any god, could never truly abandon his children, after all. The winds still blow, the sun still shines and the flowers still grow. If there were no god, no Maker, we could not say that. Besides, the Blight isn't from the maker – the chantry only added that to the Chant of Light during the Third Blight…"

Her jaw dropped, "Really?" she sounded so hopeful.

"Think about it this way, Leli. If the Maker had sent the Blight, would Grey Wardens exist? Who was it that gave the very first Wardens the idea and the way to do it? Could an agent of the Maker have been among them?" I smiled.

She nodded, "That does make sense… if he had abandoned us then we would all truly be dead by now."

"Your past will catch up to us and I will help you. I won't allow you to fall while you're still needed."

"Needed?"

"You are a vital part of the future, my dear. I cannot say how, but you will always be on the path of the Maker."

She smiled brilliantly.

My next stop was Lyna as I held out the Carved Halla – and since Sereda was with her, I gave her the Jeweled Hip-Flask.

"Ma Serannas, Lethallan." Lyna smiled. I winked at her and Sereda looked inside the flask with a whistle, "That's the good stuff – from Orzammar."

"It came with a free flask, so I thought you might like it," I laughed. She nodded, "This is good – thanks, Salroka."

I wondered my way over to Daylen next, giving him one of the two spell books. He looked at it in shock. "These are spells that would never make their way into the Circle – not for anyone who wasn't a sanctioned Battle-Mage!"

I shrugged, "I have one as well. Bodahn was selling it… speak of the devil…" I chuckled as I noticed the merchant hobbling us to our camp. I greeted him.

"Welcome Bodahn – you're free to stay, just mind yourselves." He beamed and replied, "Wonderful – thank the nice lady, my boy!"

"Thank you nice lady!" the boy said. I smiled happily – I adored Sandal!

Aedan and Alistair returned so I handed Alistair his gift – the Warden hand puppet set.

He glanced at me with a smile that melted my heart and said, "Just how well do you know me, anyway?"

"… You love fine cheese, have a minor obsession with your hair, and thought of Duncan as a father for the past several months… I…" I had to cut myself off before I could say 'How could I not know my mate?'

"Well… I have a favor to ask of you…" he flushed.

I admit, my interest was piqued as he pulled out a rose and said, "Do you… know any preservation spells? I don't want it to wilt and die so soon…"

I grinned widely, "I can do that – nature is a Druidic art."

I took the rose, letting my magic envelop it. I handed it back once I was done. "Thank you." He smiled. I grinned and bowed my head as I headed for dinner.

Having passed out all the gifts, I settled in. the only person I hadn't bought something for was Aedan – and that was because I wasn't sure what to get him yet. I would, eventually; but for now…

Aedan spoke up, "Why do people keep calling you Fae – just… a random thought."

I coughed and flushed, "Alright, real quick – I've had several names and titles. I will lay them all out for you, and you can all choose what to call me, since I will answer to any of them and most of you can't seem to decide what to call me in the first place. Titles are as follow – General, Dovahkiin, Dragonborn, Listener, Guild Master, and… no, I'm not going to add that last one. My names were as follow – Selene, Ariis, Faerine and now Atarah."

"… Could you explain those last 2 titles? The Listener, and Guild Master ones?" Lyna was giggling.

I gave the biggest smirk I could, "I was the Listener for the Assassins guild – also known as the Dark Brotherhood. I would listen to the night-mother and relay where the assassins in my guild would go for our contracts. Guild Master was my title in the Thieves Guild – I was the best damn thief in the place."

"Wait – Assassin and Thief?" Alistair asked.

"Oh… right; forgot some of you are on the straight and narrow. When I was only about… let's see here… human years 33, add Nordic time… 34 years old, I helped a kid kill an abusive orphanage matron. Well, that gained me entry to the Dark Brotherhood – I mean I knew it would but the bitch needed to die. That… set me on the path to killing an emperor. I'm not proud of it, but he was ready to die. He only asked that I kill the guy who set the hit on him to begin with… I did. All that time, I was also in the thieves' guild – I needed the coin and they were more moral than you'd think – they never killed their marks. They'd rather just break out of jail for theft rather than kill someone."

"What is Dragonborn?" Sten asked.

"I hold the souls of all the dragons I've ever killed – and that is because I had the soul of a Dragon to begin with." I shrugged.

"Wait – back up for a minute. You were an Assassin and a thief?" Aedan still couldn't believe it. I sighed, "Look, guys – that was more than 10 thousand years ago. I knew what needed to happen, so I did it. Have I killed people that deserved to live? I can't say, because I was never worthy of judging that. All I can say is that… it's in the distant past – I've had a long time to do worse or better depending on your views. No war is bloodless, guys."

Sten nodded, "That is true – there are even bystanders or civilians in every war."

I nodded, "The only thing I have held firm on… no killing children. I could never bring myself kill a child. I would usually spare the child's caretaker too if they were around. I came to be known as someone honorable – even among the Horde, if a parent saw me while their city was being burned, they would bring their children to me – because I would prevent even my allies from harming a child."

Leliana nodded, "That is honorable…"

"What tile were you going to say, but didn't?" Sereda asked.

I muttered softly. Alistair – sensing a chance, I guess – jumped, "Come on… tell us… you know you want to…"

I glared and tossed a sticky bun at him, "Queen, you arse – I was going to say Queen."

"Right – betrothed to a king and you're… got it…" Alistair wrapped it up nicely.

I shook my head, "I don't plan to allow that betrothal to be any more than that. I'll marry a farmer before I ever take the throne of the Alliance."

Lyna let out a giggle.

Morrigan spoke, "So… what is our plan moving forward?"

"I don't know about you, but I plan to sleep my way through everyone I meet," I said in a deadpan.

Alistair sputtered, "What?"

"I'm joking – we are now on our way to the Circle at Lake Calenhad – Kinlock Hold. I will be aiding the Mages in their… issue. Abominations and blood mages will have taken over the tower by the time we get there. I will be killing all those who are corrupted, because we will need the Mages later – on top of the fact that if I help the mages, then I can get mages and Templars for our Army against the Darkspawn. Greagoir likes me well enough – even taught me some Templar abilities. My magic isn't bound to the Fade, nor am I susceptible to Demons, so… point is, he doesn't know I have magic at all."

"How do you have such detailed information on what we will face?" Daylen asked.

"Like I told you Wardens back in the Korcari Wilds – my original home world knew all my following homes as fantasy – I know a lot of information until about… 9:44 Dragon or so; somewhere in there. I plan to keep my impact on the time-line small, so I won't be calling Azeroth to aid us in the final battle – and trust me; it is… a lot better that way."

Aedan looked amused, "So… on the topic of your mates…?"

"No," I said firmly.

"Fine – I have a question," Daylen said firmly.

"What – if it's about mates or…" I narrowed my eyes.

"No – I'm curious about your first life. You talk about the other places – Skyrim and Azeroth – so easily, but you kind of… avoid the first place. Never say the name of the place; never tell us what you did or anything…"

I shook my head, "Well… I mean… it was boring in comparison… who would want to hear that?"

Hands raised; All the Wardens and Leliana. I sighed, "My name, as stated, was Selene – Selene Heart. I was a stay at home mother – meaning, of course, when I was thrust into Skyrim with a Dragon chomping at the bit to kill us all, it was all I could do to not pass the fuck out while I fought to survive. I had to kill people as I escaped too. When it was all over… when I could finally rest… I threw up. Well… I had a wife and 2 sons – medicine was so advanced there. Those kids were really ours – though we were both women. That's kind of… all there was to it. I was 33 years old and died when I… well it was stupid, actually. Fell down a flight of stairs and broke my neck. Humans are so very fragile."

"You're joking… right? You used to be human?" Lyna looked amused.

"Not joking, no. In fact, the only inhabitants of my first world were Humans – well… there were Dwarves but they were just really short humans, nothing more. My second world, I was a Nord; a type of human. On Nirn, everyone could learn magic… as long as they went to the Collage and got training for it. Then I wake up after that last Dragon did me in as a bloody elf – excuse the pun."

"What pun?" Alistair looked intrigued.

"I was covered in blood – I had just been born; again. Not comfortable at all, let me tell you. I was also half Sin'dorei – literally translates to Child of the Bloodline."

"Wait – you can remember your time as an infant?" Morrigan now looked interested.

"It was for the better that I was fully sentient for that… if I had been a normal baby – one who cried often – I would have died early on. My care-takers were my Uncle Malfurion and Aunt Tyrande… to them; I should never have been born so they hired nannies. They couldn't just abandon me, with her being a Priestess of Elune and him being a Druid – both meaning that they cherished life. But the ones they had nursing me had no such qualms. It was better that I never gave them a reason. When Elune blessed me, Tyrande became my biggest champion – she still didn't like me, but that made sure she had a reason to make sure I was educated, fed and to discover what magic I held. When my uncle found out that the nurse-maids had been cutting away my antlers – which are a sign of great druidic potential – he was furious. Not because he liked me all of a sudden, but because of the silver color of my antlers meaning I was chosen by Cenarius – Lord of the Forest and the origin of Druid magic."

"How does that matter?" Daylen, ever the student, asked. I sighed, "Cenarius taught Uncle Mal. Cenarius is a demigod. To have been chosen as his champion and then to have the proof of it continuously cut away – a painful thing, mind you – showed a lot of things were wrong. It was considered vile enough that when the demigod heard what had happened – that my antlers would no longer grow, regardless of what he did – he was enraged. Elune, the Sunwell, Cenarius… all these powerful entities claimed me from birth or puberty… yet still I was treated like the lowest." I stopped talking when I realized how bitter I sounded.

"Forgive me, friends – I didn't mean to…"

Alistair cut off my apology by hugging me. I blinked in shock but allowed it.

"What about Inas? I mean… you said you were chosen over and over so how did he get to be Champion of Azeroth?" Lyna asked.

I shrugged, "The World-Soul, Azeroth, chose him. It stands to reason I cannot always be chosen – a balance must be kept."

"I don't know… sounds odd to me. As though all those other entities as you called them… were granting you all that power to prepare you for the future but then…" Leliana reasoned.

I chuckled, "I could ask Magni sometime, but I doubt Azeroth ever intended to pick me. I can't always be the Hero; even a hero needs a brake."

With that, we all turned in for the night.