CW for descriptions of the physical aftermath of a violent act. If that's not something you want to engage with, skip the italic section in the second half of the chapter. You should be able to pick back up with the story without any issue.

Kouga's words echoed in Kagome's mind. It felt like the air had been sucked out of the room – her lungs screamed for oxygen, but she couldn't fill them no matter how deeply she breathed.

"The fuck do you mean 'Onigumo died four years ago'?" Inuyasha voiced the question on the tip of Kagome's tongue as Kouga rolled his eyes.

"I mean he's dead, you dingus. Since two weeks after…" The cop let his voice trail off as he tapped the evidence bag.

"We closed the case not long after he offed himself." Kagome winced at the phrasing, even though she knew Onigumo didn't deserve any sympathy. "It was pretty obvious, anyway."

"Not that obvious, asshole," Inuyasha interjected, pointing back at the evidence envelope. Kagome sighed, massaging her temples as her annoyance at the two men distracted her enough from her panic for her breathing to resume.

"Who even are you, anyway?" Kouga challenged as he rose from his seat, the chair making an ear-shattering screeching sound as the legs scraped against the cement floor. Inuyasha slammed a hand on the table, gritting his teeth, as Kagome decided she'd had enough of men, however well-intentioned, letting their egos get in the way.

"That's enough!" Her voice rang out much louder than she'd intended, but she didn't care. She was over this day, over this place, over everything.

The room fell silent as the two men turned to face her.

"You should both be ashamed of yourselves!" Kagome began, pulling no punches.

"You can both have your dick measuring contest after I go home. Just because I've apparently gotten caught up in… something doesn't mean I need you," she pointed at Inuyasha, "to speak for me, nor do I need you," she turned her attention to the cop, "to question his motives. He cared for Kikyo just as much as I did, and that's all you need to know about that. Understand?"

Both men nodded, chastised.

"Good. Thank you." She pulled her hair back with the ponytail holder on her wrist as she took deep breath to soothe the anger that had quickly replaced her shock. "Now then… Onigumo is dead, so who would have a vested interest in harassing me? Who would have access to her necklace? Weren't her belongings sent back to her family?"

She wasn't going to broach the subject of the braid. It was a sick joke, she'd told herself; there was no way it had belonged to Kikyo. She refused to even consider it.

Her stomach lurched as Kouga refused to look her in the eye, seemingly staring past her shoulder instead of responding to her questions. She fixed him with a stare, steeling herself for the answers that she knew she didn't really want to learn.

"I need an answer. I'm not leaving until you give it to me."

"I don't know," he sighed, turning to look her in the eyes. She felt Inuyasha tense, his hand still on her leg.

"Kikyo's belongings were sent back to her family. This necklace," he lifted the evidence bag, "wasn't among them. We assumed that Onigumo dumped it somewhere, since we didn't find it in his belongings."

"So you just gave up? You closed the case and moved on?" Inuyasha cut in, his grip on Kagome's knee tightening. She winced at the pressure, though she couldn't blame him: she was just as upset as he was at the thought of Kikyo suffering the way she had, only for her death to be minimally investigated.

"Budget shortfall," Kouga shrugged. "It didn't make sense to keep chasing leads when we had a clear suspect who... took care of things on his own, shall we say?"

Kagome winced again.

"What about the braid, then?" Inuyasha was nearly growling at this point, his grip on Kagome's leg tightening further. She tapped his hand furiously as his nails cut into her jeans, and he stopped nearly as quickly as he'd started. He grabbed her free hand in a silent apology as he fixed Kouga with a glare that could melt ice.

Kouga sighed again, taking a moment to adjust his uniform shirt uncomfortably. Kagome tried to steel herself for the details she knew were coming, but she knew she never would really be ready.

"It, uh," he began, "definitely aligns with the condition she was found in. We'd need to do testing to confirm, but…" he trailed off, allowing a heavy silence to fall back over the room.

Kagome's heart sank and she gripped Inuyasha's hand hard, her knuckles turning white.

"So," she started shakily, swallowing briefly to steady her voice, "what now?"

"Well, we're going to try to track down who sent this to you." Kouga reached across the table, ignoring the Inuyasha's deepening scowl as he patted the hand Kagome rested on the table.

She nodded, processing it all. "And what happens until you do?"

Kouga sighed again. Kagome was getting awfully tired of all of the sighing.

"Just tell me." She stopped trying to hide the edge in her voice.

"If you get more mail, save it and bring it to me. We can – "

A fist slammed on the table, interrupting Kouga mid-sentence and startling Kagome so thoroughly that she swore she jumped six inches at least.

"That's bullshit and you know it," Inuyasha growled. "That's all you can do? No way."

"Yeah, it is bullshit," Kouga sighed. "I'm sorry, but unless there's solid evidence that Kagome's in physical danger, it's all we can do right now."

Kagome nodded, gathering her coat and tote bag. "Well, in that case, I suppose we'll be in touch shortly," she responded tersely, heading towards the door.

Kouga nodded in agreement, stopping her in the doorway. "If anything else comes in, call me," he replied grimly, setting a hand on her shoulder. "See if you can't work from a different office. Maybe have someone else collect any mail that comes in for you."

"Yeah," Inuyasha shoved Kouga's hand from Kagome's shoulder. "Thanks for nothing," he called over his shoulder before he shepherded Kagome back down the hall, through the lobby, and out the front door.

It was cold and foggy still, dark clouds hanging low in the sky above. It must have rained while they were inside, she realized, noting the damp sidewalk.

"That was really unnecessary, you know," she ducked out of Inuyasha's grip as they exited the building, careful not to slip on the walkway as she turned to face him. "I know you're upset. I'm upset. It's painful. But Kouga is a good guy, and he's trying to help."

"Like hell he is, Kagome! You heard him!" Inuyasha's eyes flashed red for the briefest moment, and though Kagome had no idea what that was about, she figured it couldn't be good. She grabbed his hands, rubbing her thumbs against the backs of his palms, ignoring that it was an awfully bold move of her, considering that they still hadn't been able to establish what, precisely, the nature of their relationship was.

"Please? I know you're hurting. Everything about this is horrific. But he's right – his hands are tied right now. Can you go along with it for now? For me?" She glanced up, pushing aside her own pain and fear to give him her best pleading look.

He sighed, fixing his gaze on the woods across the street behind her. "Fine. I'll go along with it for now."

"Good," Kagome smiled wanly. "I have to run," she murmured, rising on her tiptoes. "Thank you for coming with me today." She brushed a chaste kiss against his cheek, suppressing a grin at the blush that appeared across his face.

"'Run'? What do you mean 'run'?" Inuyasha sputtered, his flush fading. "I'm taking you home. You should sleep!"

"Like hellyou are! I'm going to work – if I don't get this trial set up today, I won't graduate this year. Don't wait for me. Go to class or whatever it is you MBA people do – gym? The bar?" She shook her head. "It doesn't matter. I'll text you if anything happens, but I promise that I'm going to talk to Kaede today about moving offices, okay?"

Inuyasha nodded grudgingly and, though Kagome could tell he wasn't happy, she would take what she could get. She turned and dashed off in the direction of the lab, desperate to dull the deep ache that had blossomed in her heart in the last twenty-four hours.

Sango tapped her stylus on the desk, sighing lightly as she glanced at the clock for what felt like the hundredth time that class.

This last hour is going to take forever…

She was so distracted today. She couldn't focus at all, even if she'd wanted to. She desperately wanted to know how the meeting with the University Police Department had gone, but based on Inuyasha's scowl and the way he was slumped in his chair, she had her suspicions.

She sighed again as the professor continued droning on: something something leveraged buyouts, something something debt financing tranches… she was fucked for any sort of information retention today, but at least she had some insurance – Miroku was seated right in front of her, typing away furiously.

Confident that she could snag a copy of her fiancé's notes after class, Sango gave up on listening altogether and closed OneNote, choosing to open Slack instead. She ignored her active group chats (as tempting as it was to catch up on the latest gossip) and moved straight to her direct messages with Inuyasha.

Are you okay?

She shook her head as soon as she'd typed it, knowing that her friend would shrug her off. She looked up again, taking in the dark look on his face. Whatever happened this morning must not have been good, and it was obviously bothering him - he was a sensitive soul, though he'd rather die than admit it to Sango (or anyone else, probably).

She wrote and rewrote her message several times, unable to strike quite the right balance of concerned and distanced. She sighed again, taking a moment to redo her ponytail as she realized exactly what she needed to ask to catch her friend off guard just enough to open up.

You look pissed. Wanna run stadium stairs about it?

She smirked as she hit "enter", glancing back across the room where Inuyasha responded to her message by meeting her gaze and quirking a brow.

She would take it, Sango decided as she moved back to her group chats.

Halfway done and Sango was gaining on him. His legs burned as he ascended yet again, feet pounding against the cement steps of the football stadium's lower bowl. If he wasn't so angry, he'd stop and let her taunt him a little. He usually enjoyed their workouts; their competitive natures complemented each other well, allowing them to push each other more than they each might allow anyone else.

It's not fair.

His breathing was quick, his panted exhales visible puffs of vapor in the cold winter air. Sango was even closer now, her light footsteps growing louder and louder behind him. If he sped up now, he'd barely make it through a second lap.

It's not fair.

He wanted to limp to the finish. He wanted to hurt tomorrow. He wanted to run himself ragged because he didn't know what else to do.

The problem was twofold: first, the stalker. That was self-explanatory. Second: he hadn't been prepared to confront the circumstances of Kikyo's death today.

Killed by the person she should be able to trust most…

Inuyasha sped up. The thought was unbearable. His chest felt like it was being ripped open, like he had felt the day he'd heard about Kikyo's death all over again.

The reemerging grief was bad enough, and the fact that Kagome was seemingly at risk as well was just too much to bear. He was sprinting at this point; no longer able to hear Sango behind him, he focused solely on the way the icy drizzle felt as it bounced off of the skin left exposed by his t-shirt and basketball shorts.

It's not fair.

It had felt like death was following him from his teens through his early twenties, and just when he was finally turning a corner, the specter had returned. Technically the Wolf was right, sure: Kagome wasn't exactly in explicit danger, but the threat was enough.

He couldn't lose someone else. He wouldn't let it happen. He would do everything in his power to ensure that it didn't, he decided as he finished his descent from section 110, stopping for a moment as he observed Sango finish her own lap. She gave him a wave as she jumped the barricade separating the stands from the field, eventually collapsing on the fifty-yard line.

Inuyasha started another lap.

"About time you finished," Sango commented dryly as he joined her on the field, ignoring the flat look he shot her way. She winked as she grabbed the hand he extended toward her, allowing him to pull her back to standing.

"Yeah, well, I'm not stuck with stupid human legs," he responded, kicking her foot lightly.

"Only half," she replied, smirking and returning the kick. "Bad morning? You really booked it."

"Worse than you could imagine," he responded shortly, offering no further detail. Sango didn't press him, instead hoping that he'd share more as he processed whatever had happened.

She zipped up her windbreaker and took a moment to fix her ponytail yet again before leading the way out of the stadium towards the bike path along the river that ran through campus. They walked silently through the light rain for about five minutes before Sango's silent bet paid off.

"It was a boyfriend," he stated simply, once again offering no further detail. Sango nodded, unsurprised but unsure of how to respond. Once again, she chose not to, figuring it would be the best way to guarantee Inuyasha kept talking.

"Did she say anything to you? Kagome, I mean."

Sango shook her head, and the look of resigned frustration on his face broke her heart a little.

"Knowing her, Kagome probably tried to step in," Sango began. "It's the only reason I can think of that would result in…" she gestured wildly for a moment, "this situation."

Smooth, Sango. Smooth.

"Except the fucker's dead," Inuyasha snorted, "So who the fuck knows anything at this point."

Sango's stomach dropped as he continued.

"Cops can't do anything. She's insisting on going back to work, and who am I to stop her? I feel…"

Helpless, she filled in mentally as he trailed off. She was crushed for Inuyasha and Kagome: finally on the verge of something great, only to have the past re-emerge in the most horrific way.

"I'll be damned if I lose her to this motherfucker, too." His words echoed against the walls of the soccer complex to their right, and Sango let the echoes fade to silence. campus all day.

She didn't know what to say. She wanted so badly to comfort him, to reassure him that it would all work out. Best case scenario was that whoever this creep was gave it up after being ignored enough, but Sango wasn't confident that would come to pass.

A heron cawed loudly from the riverbank to her left, unseen through the fog covering the area, as she racked her brain for a response.

"Race you back to class," she began, wincing internally at the seeming callousness, though she continued regardless. "If there's nothing we can do right now, might as well get the energy out. Last one there owes the winner a coffee."

He was off sprinting before Sango could turn toward him to gauge his response.

It was too dark, Kagome realized as she stumbled into the lab. She hated being called in this late, but usually Kikyo was here on the rare occasion it happened. It was unlike her to page someone and then no-show. The LED light strips Kagome and Ayumi had installed under the benches the year before were turned off, which was odd, and the emergency exit sign that hung from the ceiling cast a red glow over everything.

Kagome wondered if she was in hell.

She opened the cabinets and closets in the main room – nothing except equipment. She checked Kaede's office – locked, and from what she could tell through the window, empty. She sighed, leaning back against the office door as she evaluated what she should do next.

She'd just pulled out her phone to text Kikyo when she noticed the light coming from the graduate student office. Relieved, Kagome crossed the lab floor and rushed through the door.

Kikyo was sitting in the middle of the room, her back slumped against her desk.

"Kikyo?" Kagome rushed toward her friend, wincing as Kikyo glanced her way, the whites of her eyes bright red. "Kikyo, what happened?"

Kagome wanted to slap herself; she knew full well what had happened and didn't need to burden Kikyo with explaining. Not here. Not now.

Kikyo turned her head, revealing a patch of naked bleeding scalp just behind her left ear. Kagome's stomach turned.

"Kagome," Kikyo sputtered. "Kagome, I don't feel well."

"I know." Kagome's voice shook, and she hated it. She should sound confident, like she knew everything was going to be okay. She took a deep breath, doing her best to steel herself before continuing.

"I'm going to call you an ambulance, okay? Everything's going to be all right soon."

Kagome's hands shook as she pulled her phone back out from her pocket, fumbling with her passcode, finally unlocking it after several attempts.

Horrorstruck, she stared blankly at her phone. She couldn't remember what to dial. The red light from the main lab grew more and more intense as she choked back tears. Kikyo started to cough, the light making the pink, foamy sputum emerging from her mouth look even more gruesome than it already was.

It was too much. Kagome couldn't breathe. The light kept growing more and more intense, preventing her from seeing the phone screen as she racked her brain for the emergency number.

Suddenly the light disappeared. Everything disappeared. Kagome was enveloped in the blackest black she had ever experienced as she fell down, down, down…

Kagome awoke with a start. She sat up, gasping for air as she turned her head, frantically scanning the room for Kikyo. She found nothing, as expected, and groaned as she glanced at the alarm clock across the room. 3:45 AM.

Not the best.

Kagome sighed, trying to will her pounding heartbeat to slow as she rolled out of bed and turned on the light.

No hope of falling back to sleep after that, so you might as well get some writing done.

She pulled her hair up, trying to get some air to the back of her neck to cool down her overheated body as she sat down at her desk. She reminded herself that what she'd just seen hadn't even been close to the reality she'd faced that night years ago. They were all bad, the nightmares: each one a different take on how Kikyo's death played out. This one had been notably graphic, though.

The truth was, Kagome didn't know the exact details of what had truly happened. The simple facts were that she'd found Kikyo that night on the floor of her office. Kagome had attempted to check her pulse, but she was cold and Kagome knew it was far too late: she hadn't looked for any marks or wounds, too panicked at the time. She had no desire to learn the details of Kikyo's demise, but Kouga confirmed more than she'd ever wanted to know.

Has it really only been hours since that meeting? It feels like we talked to Kouga a month ago already…

Kagome took another deep breath, trying to remind her body that her lungs could, in fact, process more oxygen than she was allowing herself to inhale as she briefly glanced at the prescription bottle on the edge of her desk.

Kaede knew her all too well. She'd arranged for Kagome to move to Jinenji's office and sent her straight to the university mental health center, ignoring her insistence that she stick around the lab to set up her trial. Kagome arrived home that evening with no progress made on her degree, but with a prescription in hand for emergency relief to supplement her existing medication.

She had thought about taking one before bed, but she was too scared of reacting poorly to the medication, perhaps oversleeping, and falling further behind on her work. It was those same fears keeping her from taking a half tablet now – Kagome realized that she was probably her own worst enemy at this point, but she'd rather make it through the week, however exhausted she may be, and get that trial started.

Relief can wait a few more days.

Kagome sighed again, opening her email and pulling the sweatshirt she kept hanging over the back of her desk chair over her head. She rubbed her hands together, trying to warm her fingers, which were chilling rapidly thanks to the commitment she and Sango had made to use the heat as sparingly as possible.

She scanned her inbox, pleasantly surprised by how few emails had piled up over the course of the day. One from Jinenji, subject line "Welcome to the Jungle" (Kagome couldn't help but smile); one from Pete offering to set up Kagome's replication trial for her, "just send me the research and I'd be happy to do it!" (she could hardly believe the nerve); one from Taisho, subject line "Your Offer of Employment"…

Wait, what?

Kagome's heart stopped momentarily. The offer was good… incredibly competitive. Competitive enough to make her want to cancel next week's Kumonosu interview right away.

Better than you could have ever dreamed.

Uneasiness settled in like a brick, and Kagome's shoulders tensed involuntarily. She'd be stupid to turn the offer down, but what would accepting it cost her?

It had been so easy to dismiss the possibility of this issue arising when she'd thought she bombed the interview last month, easy to chase a different kind of happiness when it seemed like professional satisfaction was a little further out than originally anticipated. Kagome unplugged her phone from its cord on the right edge of her desk, starting a new message as she did her best to ignore her swirling thoughts.

What worth is a dream job if it comes at the expense of your personal happiness?

She didn't need this; not this week, of all weeks, she thought as she typed frantically, hindered slightly by her shaking hands. She ignored the inner voice trying to remind her that she still had another interview next week, that she didn't need to make this choice now. That maybe Kaede could provide some perspective; Kagome shouldn't make decisions like this so early in the morning on such little sleep.

She sent the text without thinking further, throwing the phone onto the bed behind her as she tried to channel her energy into dissertation progress.

He was beginning to think this diner was cursed. It was the only explanation for why they were never happy here, Inuyasha figured as he watched Kagome fiddle with a coffee stirrer, lost in thought.

"Did you sleep at all last night?" He knew the answer without asking, but he asked anyway in case he was wrong.

He wasn't.

"A little," Kagome replied simply, turning to look out the window to her left as she rested her cheek on her hand tiredly.

She was unusually reserved today, he noted, not that he could blame her. He hadn't slept much either, though Inuyasha had come to learn over the last few months that he could manage exhaustion better than Kagome could. He wasn't doing great, but he could fake it pretty convincingly.

Their food arrived, and while he dug in enthusiastically, Kagome hardly touched her oatmeal. She continued to stare out the window, absentmindedly stirring her spoon.

"You should eat," he said, setting his fork down and tapping the side of her bowl with a finger. "Have you eaten anything yet today?"

Kagome looked back at him, mustering up a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "Do coffee and Lexapro count?" Her tone was just a little too bright, and her voice wavered ever-so-slightly.

"No, coffee and Lexapro do not count," he sighed exasperatedly. "You're a PhD candidate, for fuck's sake. You'd think you'd be smarter than that." He shook his head, exaggerating his annoyance in a feeble attempt to lighten the mood.

He wasn't sure it worked.

"Eat," he continued, trying again. "Don't make me feed you in public. I'll do it if I have to."

Kagome laughed a little, as she picked up her spoon and began to eat. Satisfied that she would keep her word, Inuyasha returned to his own meal.

"Uh," Kagome spoke suddenly, rubbing her eyes briefly before meeting his gaze, "I wanted to talk to you about something."

"'Bout what?"

Kagome slid her phone across the table, an email open on the screen.

"We need to stop seeing each other," she stated as he read.

Her words cut through him like a knife. It was worse than the first time here all those months ago, he noted as he reluctantly took the phone from her.

"It wouldn't be right," she began, voice trembling. "I can't give anyone even the perception that I'm in a position like this because I'm dating you." A couple of tears spilled from her eyes, and Kagome frantically tried to wipe them away.

"You don't have to decide this now," he began, hoping he didn't sound as desperate as he felt. Yesterday he felt like his chest was being torn open. Today somehow felt worse than that, like someone ripping him apart, limb by limb.

"Yes I do," Kagome replied glumly. "Really."

He wasn't sure who she was trying to convince with that response, and, sensing an opportunity, he tried again.

"You still have another interview. You haven't made a decision yet." He was begging, but he didn't care. He'd be damned if he let her go without a fight.

Tell her you love her, you idiot. Pour your goddamn heart out.

He considered it, taking a look around the moderately-crowded diner. Most of the patrons were hungover undergrads, half-asleep in their booths.

Do it; they won't be listening and don't give a fuck anyway.

He was working up the nerve to commit just as Kagome spoke again.

"It's too much," stated simply, wiping more tears away with her napkin. "It's just so much… I'm not sleeping, I'm not eating, the nightmares are intense… They gave me more medication and I'm too afraid to take it in case it interferes with work…" She trailed off, looking down at her oatmeal, now cold.

"I'm a mess, aren't I?" She looked back at him, eyes shining. "God, you deserve so much better," she sighed.

"You're not a mess," he replied without thinking, heart breaking a little at her words. "This week has been a shitshow. You're right that it's too much. It's too much for me, and you're… honestly, you're barely holding it together."

Kagome nodded, and Inuyasha reached his arm across the table to grab her hand.

"So," he began, and he hated himself a little for what he was about to say even though he knew it was the right thing to do, "let's pause. Everything about us stays exactly as it is now for as long as you need. Get healthy again."

"But the job," Kagome interrupted, "That's going to come up. I can't have my career overshadowed by rumors about how I succeeded. I can't."

And I can't spend my life wondering "what if?".

"I know. We'll deal with that later. You still have another interview next week. Go take care of yourself first, and we'll deal with the other stuff together, okay?"

He was rambling and he wanted to punch himself, but something in that word vomit seemed to resonate with Kagome, so he'd take what he could get.

"Okay." Kagome tightened her grip on his hand and nodded, smiling genuinely at Inuyasha for the first time in what felt like all week. "Can you walk home with me?"

"Yeah," he replied, somehow simultaneously relieved and full of dread as he paid the bill, "Yeah, I can do that."

Yet as they left the diner together, Kagome tucked safely under his arm, Inuyasha couldn't help but wonder whether they were just postponing the inevitable.