Seth

I finally drag myself home from the lumber yard around two in the afternoon. I'm dead weight, and I want nothing more than to crawl into bed, maybe with Katie, and take a nice long nap.

But as soon as I approach the house, I realize a nap is less than likely. I can hear horrible pop music – Leah's favorite – blaring, and I see mom's car still outside.

When I push open the door, my eyes zero in on Katie. She, my mom and my sister are dancing around the kitchen, singing all the words to that retched song. Although the song itself is horrible, I recognize Katie's voice over all the others, and the sweet melody makes me smile ear to ear. Okay, maybe this song isn't that bad.

Katie spots me watching her, and her face lights up.

I make my way across the room to her, and she slips her arms around my waist. I'm surprised she's choosing to embrace me in front of my family. Maybe the fact that mom and Leah are still dancing gives her a false sense of privacy.

"I'm sorry for last night, er—this morning," she mumbles into my chest. "I was very grouchy. You didn't deserve that."

I kiss her forehead, and she colors crimson before stepping away. "'S okay, now I know not to wake you up at four in the morning. And again at six-thirty."

Katie laughs, nodding in agreement.

"You're a good dancer," I say, and I watch her face flush deeper.

"You must be exhausted," she says; she's trying to change the subject.

I shake my head in protest. "No, I'm okay. We've hardly spent any time together yet this weekend," I say.

But then I yawn, and she has to fight her laugh as she shoves me down the hall. "Take a nap, Seth. I'll be here," she says.

"Promise?" I say from my bedroom doorway.

She nods, smiling. "Promise."

I wake up from my nap around dinnertime – Mom is definitely gone now. Part of me feels guilty for being more upset about not spending time with Katie than her. Maybe I could find some time this week go over and see her for dinner.

Katie is doing homework on the couch when I find her; Leah must be out, because I don't hear her.

"Hey, sleepyhead," she says, closing her textbook with a thud. "Feeling better?"

I nod eagerly. "Much. Have you eaten?" I ask, feeling the familiar rumblings of hunger in my stomach.

She shakes her head. "I thought we could make dinner together."

"Katie Prescott wants to cook?" I ask doubtfully, extending a hand for her and pulling her to her feet after she accepts it.

She shrugs. "Your mom and Leah and I made soup earlier. It was kind of fun," she says. "Which reminds me…" she trails off, the corners of her mouth twisting into a smile. "Did you tell your mom I eat like an unsupervised middle school boy when I'm at school?"

I laugh. "No, I most definitely said unsupervised high school boy," I say, pulling her toward the kitchen.

"Heading out?" Leah's voice calls from behind me the next weekend.

When I look over my shoulder, she's leaning against my doorframe, arms crossed.

"Yeah. It's my turn to "make the trip"," I say with a smile, using air quotes. "But I'll be back on Sunday, like normal. I'm more excited than usual. We were like ships in the night last weekend. It didn't feel quite right."

She doesn't respond verbally, but I can still feel her eyes on me.

"What?" I ask, zipping my bag and turning to look at her.

She presses her lips together, like she's thinking of how to answer. "I wish you could see what this is doing to the both of you," she finally says.

My brow furrows. "What d'you mean?"

She tries to smile at me, but it doesn't reach her eyes. It's a look of sympathy. It's unfamiliar to me on Leah's face. "Nothing. Tell Katie I said hi, okay?"

This semester is much less stressful for Katie than her last, thanks to her not having English again. We're actually able to enjoy most of our weekends, when I'm not on patrols and when she's not studying.

The weekend always passes much too quickly, regardless of what we decide to do. This weekend, we watched movies, explored more of Capitol State Forest, and watched a rare beach sunset.

Like always, it's never enough.

My phone alarm rings on Sunday afternoon, and even before it's silenced, I feel Katie's body tense as she stands from her place on the couch. She turns away from me, hastily shoving her palms into her eyes as she walks toward her front door.

This is the only part of our relationship we hate – saying goodbye.

I jump to my feet after her. "Hey, come here," I say, grabbing her shoulders and spinning her back toward me. I wrap my arms around her and hold her against my chest.

She takes a shaky, deep breath against me, and I find myself mimicking the action into her hair, knowing it will be the last whiff of her for another week.

"I'm so tired of this," she says quietly, voice trembling.

I mutter an agreement against her blonde hair, pulling her even closer. "I know. But hey, spring break is only five days away, right? Which means you're coming to stay with me. And then the semester is over half done, and then it will be summer, and you can come stay with me again," I say softly.

She pulls back, craning her neck to meet my eyes. "Really? The whole summer?" It's hard to miss the doubt in her tone, even as she winds her hands around my neck.

"Really," I smile, leaning down to place a kiss on her still-shaking lips.

She knots her fingers in the hair at the nape of my neck, pulling herself harder against me. My lips open in surprise, and she takes the opportunity to find my tongue with hers.

"Katie," I groan, pulling back.

"Please don't leave," she chokes out, tears falling onto her cheeks as she reaches for my lips again, standing on her tiptoes.

"Baby, you know I have to," I mumbles against her lips. I feel the strain behind her movements as she works to hold herself to me; I wonder if she can feel my strain from trying to control myself.

"Seth, please, just stay," she begs, moving her lips to my throat and sucking at the skin there.

I'm throaty and hoarse when I am able to speak next. "Are you asking me or telling me?" If she's telling me, if it's a command – which is what I hope it is – then I'll stay in a heartbeat.

She sighs, stilling her lips against my pulse point. "I wish you didn't have to go," she finally whispers.

I nod, grabbing her chin and lifting her face to mine. I rest my forehead on hers. I try to be gentle as I run my thumb under her wet cheeks, collecting the tears my upcoming departure had deposited there. I feel wetness gathering in my own eyes, too, but I'm not concerned about me right now.

"Me too," I say, still coarse. "It's not always going to be this way," I think aloud. I couldn't do this any longer than necessary. Me being the reason for Katie's tears was causing a pain my chest that was becoming more and more apparent every time we parted. "I promise."

Her eyes squeeze shut, a fresh wave of tears surfacing. "Call me when you can, okay?" she asks, sniffling. Her voice is strained, and I know she's holding back emotion on my behalf at the promise I'd just made her.

I nod, and the movement makes my vision of her blurry as my own tears drop onto my cheeks. "I love you so much, Katie," I whisper before bringing my lips to hers softly for the last time today – the last time for five days. I try to keep more tears from falling.

She nods against my lips. "I love you, too, Seth. So much it hurts."

Truer words have never been spoken, I think to myself as I turn and head toward the door.

"Be careful," she whispers as I'm nearly through the threshold.

I promise, Katie.

I've just phased in when I hear Katie start to cry. Sobbing is probably a more accurate description. She must have tried to wait until I was out of earshot, like she does every weekend when we part.

Hot tears of my own sting my eyes, and I let out a sharp howl.

It always hurts to be away from Katie. But recently it's gotten astronomically worse, because I know our separation hurts her, too. The more she makes her anguish known, the harder it is to leave. And if I have to leave, then I need my feet to carry me as far away from her cries, as fast as they'll go.

I hear Leah talking with Collin worriedly about the howl when they notice it's stopped.

Hey, Seth. Nothing much going on tonight. Will probably be an easy shift, Collin says nervously.

Thanks, I respond, my mind flicking back to Katie's tears as they get fainter and fainter as I pull myself away from Olympia. A calm shift would do me no favors in keeping Katie off my mind.

I feel Leah's concern. Go head out, Collin, she says.

Collin thinks about protesting, but my discomfort must overwhelm him, because I feel him phase out shortly after.

Spill it, Seth. What'd you do? Leah asks, tone snarky.

I snuff. I'm already at the border where the patrol drops off, so I follow Collin's scent easily and fall into a comfortable stride pattern.

I left.

You – what? She asks, and I feel her search my mind, my surroundings, to see where I am.

Not like that, I huff. Stay where you are. This happens every weekend. But this time was different.

I replay my goodbye with Katie, painfully, in my head, hearing her voice break over and over.

I feel Leah soften considerably. Seth… she trails off.

Leah flashes me a memory, of her and Katie on Valentine's Day, when I'd left her to cover Quil's patrol. She replays Katie's words in her heads over and over and over.

"I can't ask him to leave any more than he can ask me to stay in La Push."

She's never going to ask you to leave, Seth. Leah starts. She knows what this means to you. She'd rather make herself miserable than ask you to give this up. So, unless you wanna do long distance forever, something's gonna have to change.

My heart is still heavy – too heavy – so I pick up the pace, pushing my strides farther and farther. My lungs ache for air, and for a few moments, it's just my heavy breathing and my paws pounding the earth beneath me.

But the sprint does nothing to still my mind. Katie's tears, her hurried kisses and attempt to hold me to her longer, the burning in my lungs even then as I knew I'd have to say goodbye to her again, and Leah's comment leaves my mind spinning.

I'm open to suggestions, I finally say, slowing back down.

Mom and Dad got married young, she says simply.

Like I hadn't already considered that. I think back to the conversation I had with Katie's father on Christmas Eve upon instinct – it felt like my only barrier.

That wasn't exactly a 'no', she snorts. Last time I checked there was more than one college in the Olympic Peninsula.

My mind flashes to a daydream – Katie in a white dress. Katie as my wife. Katie sharing my bed for more than two nights in a row. Katie sharing every piece of herself with me.

Seth! Leah growls.

Oops, sor— but then I realize why she's growled.

Leah's picked up a scent.

That's not the Cullens, is it? Leah asks, but her tone makes it sound like she already knows the answer.

I'm on my way, send the call, I say, picking up my pace again.

Leah sends out the distress call, and after, she growls again. Damn it, Collin. Fucker said it was going to be an easy shift.

Is it just the one vampire? I search Leah's thoughts to confirm my suspicions, too impatient to wait for an answer.

I feel Jake phase in, and I try in vain to catch up to Leah as she heads up the coast.

What do you know? Jake directs to Leah.

Leah replays the scene before her, and the scent.

Seth, when you reach where Leah picked up the scent, trace it backwards. See where it came from. I'll follow after Leah.

I pick up my pace, but the duffle bag still hanging from my neck keeps me from reaching maximum speed. I consider ditching it.

But it reminds me of Katie. Our conversation, our goodbye flashes in my mind again.

I push ahead, willing myself to keep my promise to her.

I practically rip Katie's car door off the hinges, trying to get it open so I can pull her into my arms.

"Happy spring break," I say when she's snuggled into my chest.

She sighs, and I feel her face twist into a sweet smile against my shirt. "A whole week."

The drizzle has started to pick up, so I quickly grab her bag from the backseat and usher her to the door.

"I just have the one patrol shift tonight, and then not another one again until Tuesday night," I say as I drop her bag by the door.

She pulls me to the couch. "Tell me about your week," she prompts as we sit. "Have there been any more threats?"

I shake my head, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her close to me. "No, we're pretty sure it was just a nomad passing through. I think our scent scared them off. When Jacob talked to Edward, he hadn't come across them again either."

She sighs in relief. "I don't like to think about being you in danger."

I pick up a lock of her hair, the one that often gets twisted around her fingers when she's bored, tired, or mesmerized. "How was your week?" I ask, shifting the conversation. "You're finished with all your midterms, right?"

Katie nods, smiling. "It was okay. It's better now. It always gets better on Fridays," she confesses, leaning into me just a little more. "Yeah, I'm done with midterms. I didn't even bring my backpack. How nice is that?" She asks, craning her neck and giving me a small peck on my jaw.

"Is Leah here?" she asks. "We could just do pizza for dinner."

"Sure, that's fine. I'm not sure we have much else. And I think Leah's sleeping. She worked the graveyard shift last night and had to go into work this morning."

She blows out a breath, grimacing. "She'll probably sleep through dinner then. We'll have to save her some food."

We eat on the couch, like we often do, and flip on the last thirty minutes of Titanic on a classic movie channel.

As the finale approaches, I hear Katie sniffle beside me. It's so cute, I have to laugh.

Katie shoves my shoulder, but with my resoluteness it turns into her pushing herself away. "Shut up, Seth. It's sweet."

I try to study what she's looking at on the screen. "It's just some pictures."

"Yeah," she says, voice garbled. "Pictures of Rose doing all the things she was supposed to do with Jack. Alone," she emphasizes. "I get that if they both squeezed on the door it would have sank or whatever," she says, using her shirt collar to dry her eyes and chuckling to herself. "But why couldn't they have at least taken turns in the water?"

I shake my head. "He wanted to give her the best chance for survival possible. I understand his rationale completely," I say, running my thumb across a stray tear she missed.

She laughs again, turning her head to kiss the palm of my hand before pulling it down and tangling it with hers in the space between us.

Something in Katie's lingered touch on my hand makes me want to reach out and kiss her, so I do. She sighs against my lips as she kneads her lips to mine, wrapping her arms around my neck.

Unable to help myself and desperate to feel her in my hands, I grab tightly to her ribs. Her fingers knot themselves in my hair. Her fingernails, ragged from where she'd likely chewed them off on the drive here, scratch the skin on my neck. Her tongue runs across my bottom lip, and I groan into her instinctively, tightening my grip on her as I push her backward onto the couch.

Our tongues slip together, and I feel Katie's pulse racing under my hands, hear her blood rushing stronger and stronger as I settle in between her legs.

I pull my lips from hers to find her neck. I suck the skin there, and she pulls in a deep lungful of air as she shifts her hips up slightly to meet mine. The scent of her desire reaches my nose, and it makes me stiffen. I am hungry, ravenous for her.

I push her shirt up and over her head, and she sighs deeply as my hands run back down her sides. My lips continue their descent farther and farther down, kissing and sucking lightly at her delicate, milky skin. Her hands move to trace the muscles of my back. My mouth reaches the fabric of her bra.

I pull back slightly, allowing my eyes to gaze over the soft curves of her body. "You're so beautiful, Katie," I say because I can't help it, and because she is, and because she needs to know.

I run my thumb across the skin below her simple black bra. There, like she'd hinted at the day I took her to James Island, was a small bouquet of flowers printed in black ink. It's so close to her heart that some of the ink is obscured by her bra. With a shaky breath, I lean down to kiss it.

A small whimper escapes her lips. "Seth, we have to stop," she says breathlessly. Her heart is pounding against her ribcage, against my lips.

"Sorry," I gruff and sit back, chest heaving in the thick air between us. "I broke my own damn rule. It won't happen again."

Katie is still trying to catch her breath as she rights herself on the couch, fumbling for the shirt I'd thrown to the floor. "It's not that I don't want to…"

I nod, working to steady my own breathing. "I know."

She lets out a relieved sigh, and a small smile breaks out across her face.

The conversation I had with Leah Sunday springs to the forefront of my mind, and before I can stop myself, I'm spitting out, "Let's get married."

She gasps, pulling her discarded shirt to her chest to cover herself. "Are you just saying that so I'll sleep with you?"

"What? No!" I exclaim, moving closer to her. I can see why she'd think that though. My timing is less than ideal.

I reach out tentatively and stroke her shoulder, still bare. "I love you, Katie," I say. "I told you at Christmas I wanted to marry you."

She bites her swollen bottom lip, nodding ever so slightly as she turns her shirt right-side out.

Maybe if I'd started this better, and not when we were hot and heavy, this would be going smoother. I take a breath, trying to recover this horrible attempt at a proposal. "Why can't we just go ahead and do it then? Why not now?" That was great. Good job, Seth.

"I'm in school," she quips, pulling her shirt overhead.

"There's a college in Forks. Port Angeles even," I try.

Katie pulls the ends of her hair out of her collar as she mumbles, "I'm only nineteen."

I counter with, "I'm twenty-one."

"We're just kids, Seth. I have no money."

"We're both perfectly legal adults. And why do you need lots of money? I have money, and we can get what we need. We can live here," I urge. I can practically hear Leah's scowl. "Katie, long distances is killing us, one week at a time. We both cry every time we say goodbye. We're miserable apart and happy together. It sounds like the perfect solution to me."

I slip off the couch and onto my knees.

"What are you doing?" she gasps, doe eyes wide with surprise.

I take her hands in mine. "Marry me, Katie Prescott. I am tired of doing this Friday, Saturday, Sunday thing. I want you every day. Every single day for the rest of my life."

She bites her lip, and her eyes drop to her lap. "This is too fast," she breathes.

My heart sinks. Actually, shattering might be a better description. Didn't she want to get married to me? Did she not feel the same? "Is it because I don't have a ring? Katie, I'll get one, I—"

"No, it's not about that," she interrupts. "We're so young, Seth. We've only known each other five months. I thought you said we didn't need to be in a hurry."

An exasperated sound escapes from the back of my throat, and there's more emotion behind it than I intend as she finds my eyes again. "I'm not in a hurry. I love you, and I want to spend my life with you."

"It's just too fast," she says again, although I'm not sure if she realized she actually spoke.

My phone alarm goes off, but neither of us move. "You have patrol," she says, voice thick as she pulls her hands gently from mine.

"When is it not going to be too fast?" I beg, ignoring the alarm.

There is so much pain behind her eyes when she meets mine again. Her lip is trembling. "I don't know. I just need more time."

"A month? Six months?" I prompt.

Katie shrugs. "I don't know."

"You'd rather keep doing this? You're okay like this? Weekends and breaks, living life in pieces and parts? Something has to change here. If you won't ask me to leave… I'm asking you to stay. Stay here with me."

"Of course I'm not going to ask you to leave!" She exclaims, her voice approaching a dangerous decibel as tears of frustration fill her eyes. Leah's certainly awake now. "You told me from the beginning that being a wolf was important to you and that it was the first place you felt like you belonged! Who am I to come in and ask you to give that up? Because, what, you imprinted on me?"

"That gives you every right to ask me to give it up! And what about you, Katie? Where exactly is it that you think you belong? Because I think – no, I know – it's here with me."

Katie drops her eyes. "You're going to be late."

"I don't care," I huff over the shrill siren, cradling her face in my hand. I wish she'd just look at me.

"Jake will," she says, still not meeting my eyes. I can tell there are tears on her lashes. I'm so tired of making her cry. "You should go," she says quietly.

"Katie…" I plead, begging her to look at me. But she doesn't. I hear a sharp howl. It's a warning – I am going to be late.

The alarm ringing overwhelms my senses all at once, and I silence it hastily. "Can we talk about this, please?" I ask, stroking her reddened cheek with my thumb.

When she answers, her whisper is barely audible. "I don't think I have anything else to say right now. It's just too fast."

I stand, unsure if my legs are going to work since my feet feel like they're weighed down with lead. I'll certainly be useless on patrol. "I'll be back in the morning, okay?" I say tentatively.

She doesn't respond again verbally, just nods as she continues not meeting my eyes.

I want to ask her if she'll still be here in the morning, but I don't think I could take it if the answer is no.