Nightmares
The next morning Zed went downstairs and got a cup of coffee. He sat at the kitchen table with the mug in his hands, but he just stared at it. He couldn't get the dream he had last night out of his head.
"Earth to Zed? You in there?" Zevon said, placing his hand on his son's shoulder.
Zed started when he came back to the present.
"Sorry, Pops. Guess I was just thinking," he said.
"Thinking about that dream you had last night?" Zevon asked.
Zed nodded and took the first sip of his coffee.
"Why don't you tell me what happened? Might ease your mind," Zevon suggested.
Zed glanced over his shoulder to make sure Zoey was still upstairs.
"Okay," he said. Zevon got a cup of coffee and sat down across from his son.
"So I was at this house. It was a really nice house too. Just the right size and a really nice yard… But anyway, I walked up to the front door and a little boy opened it. I just kinda knew it was my kid. I mean, he looked like me with a little bit of Addison so it was pretty obvious. He was about five. He took me to the backyard to show me a new swing his "daddy" made him. Long story short, he fell and wanted Eric over me. It made me so mad that that other man was my kid's dad that I woke myself up" Zed explained. When he had finished he sighed and took another sip of coffee. "Oh, and Addie was pregnant with Eric's baby," he finished.
"Wow…" Zevon said as he thought of how to respond.
Zed glanced at him out of the corner of his eye. "Yeah…" he said softly.
"Zed, I don't know how this is all going to work out. I don't know if Eric is still going to be around when the baby is born or if Eric and Addison are going to end up getting married. But I do know this, I know that your kid is going to love you no matter who he is with more often. He might end up being around Eric more often, but that doesn't mean he will love you any less. It might make it harder when he is young because he will probably be more comfortable around Eric, but that doesn't make you any less of a dad," Zevon assured his son.
Zed thought about what his dad was saying. He hated thinking that Eric would get to spend more time with his son. He also really did not like the idea of Addison and Eric getting married. The more Zed thought about it, the more he realized he still was very much in love with Addison. And now that they were having a baby, there was nothing more he wanted to do than to be with her every second of the day and spend the rest of his life with her… But if that was going to happen, he would have to be patient and wait on her. If he and Addie were meant to be together, it would happen, but he had to accept that it might take some time for Addison to decide when that would happen or if it would happen at all.
"What are we talking about?" Zoey asked as she walked into the room, yawning and rubbing her eyes.
"Nothing, Zo," Zed sighed.
"That means it's something," she said, pointing a finger accusingly.
"We were just talking about Addison and the baby," Zevon explained, kissing the top of his daughter's head.
He went to the kitchen and came back with a few cereal boxes and a gallon of milk.
"Okay, kids, eat up. I need to go get ready for work," Zevon said as he got up. He turned and pointed at Zed. "And you need to get back to campus. I am okay with you missing class today, but you are not missing class and practice tomorrow!" he said firmly.
Zed grinned and saluted. "Yes, sir," he said teasingly.
Zed's phone started ringing. He looked down and was surprised to see Bree's name on the screen.
He tapped the green icon. "Hey, Bree. What's up?" he asked
"Hey, have you heard from Addie lately? She hasn't called me in weeks," she said.
Zed frowned. "Well, yeah. I went and visited her over the weekend," he said slowly.
"You did? Are you two back together?" she asked.
"Nooo… she is with Eric. I went back because she is pregnant," he said.
There was silence for a few minutes. "She is what?" Bree asked quietly.
"She is pregnant… with my kid. I went for the first scan," Zed explained.
"Why isn't she calling me to tell me this stuff?" Bree asked. She sounded hurt.
"I don't know, Bree. I can call her and see if I can find out what's up?" he offered.
"Would you? She isn't answering my calls," Bree said sadly, "Wait, does Bonzo know?"
"For sure. I'm driving back to school so I'll call her. Yeah, he knows, but you know how he is. He doesn't share things if he feels it isn't his information to share," Zed reminded.
"That's true. I actually really admire that about him. Okay, I have to go to class. Thanks, Zed," Bree said.
"Of course. Stay awake," he teased.
"Ugh, this is the worst class to stay awake in! Bye," Bree laughed and then hung up.
About an hour later Zed was in the car. He turned his phone on speaker and set it in the passenger seat while it rang for Addie.
"Hello?"
"Hey."
"Zed? What's up?" Addie asked.
"Bree just called me. She didn't know about Eric or the baby. She says you haven't called her in weeks," he said.
Addie was silent.
"I thought you two were best friends," he said.
"We are. She is my best friend," Addison said defensively.
"Then what's going on? She is feeling hurt, Addie," he told her.
"I just…"
"Addison, she is your best friend!"
"I can't face her! Okay? Everything is just so messed up," she replied. Zed could tell she was crying.
"Addison," he said softly.
"This wasn't how things were supposed to happen. She and I always had a whole plan that we were going to go to school together and then graduate together and then we'd get married and live next door to each other. Then our kids would be able to grow up being best friends too. And I messed literally every part of that up!" she said loudly through the speaker.
Zed sighed. He felt for her, he really did. "But she loves you, Addie. She will understand. Just call her, okay?" he said softly.
He heard Addie sigh. "Okay…" she replied quietly.
"She is in class right now, but I think she gets out around lunch," Zed told her.
"I'll call her. Thanks, Zed."
"Of course, Addie. Hey, all of us love you and we all miss you. Don't forget that, okay?" he said.
Addie sniffed. "Yeah, I love all of you guys and I really miss home," she replied.
"Well, Thanksgiving break is in a month and a half. Then you can come to see everyone," Zed reminded her.
"That feels like so far away," she said quietly.
Zed smiled. "It'll be here before you know it," he assured her.
"Yeah…" Addison said hesitantly.
"Plus you have Eric, right? You have a lot of fun with him," Zed offered.
Addie smiled. "Yeah, he's great," she agreed, her voice monotone.
Zed frowned, he thought he heard some hesitation in her agreement, but he decided to let it slide. "When is your next doctor's appointment?" Zed asked.
"Not until October. I'll tell you how it goes," Addison promised.
"Okay. I appreciate that," Zed replied.
They were quiet for a few minutes. Zed knew he should say bye, but he really didn't want to. He just wanted to go to bed and fall asleep talking to her like they used to.
"Zed?"
"Yeah?"
"I said I need to go," Addison said.
"Oh, sorry. Yeah, I should go too. I'm almost back to campus," Zed agreed.
"Bye, Zed," Addie said, almost a whisper.
"Bye, Addison," Zed answered. And then he heard the call hang up.
I sighed. "She's worth it," I reminded myself, "She is worth however long it takes for us to be okay again. And my son is worth it too."
*the week before Thanksgiving break*
Zed groaned and looked at the clock. Why had he woken up at two in the morning? He yawned and rolled back onto his side and was almost back asleep when he heard his phone ringing.
That's what had woken him up. He had three missed calls. His heart stopped when he saw who was calling him though.
He tapped the green answer button and held the phone to his ear.
"Addison? What's wrong?"
Addison sniffed and sounded like she was crying. "I made a mistake," she whispered.