23
It's early yet, and the machines behind the counter of the Broken Egg Café were still yet to warm, so Renee pondered this as she tried to wrack her brain for how she was going to explain her supervised return to work to the two employees that she managed, though the cook that worked in back, she knew, was apt to not really give a crap, and the only other waitress that worked under her, it was her day off, besides.
Her tired eyes flitted towards Sirius, sitting alone in the corner, his hands wound tightly around a cup of piping tea.
She did not know how long he had been sitting there, nonchalantly and discreetly keeping a watchful eye over her, under the older wizard's orders until they nabbed the creep that was rumored to be coming after her, though Sirius had promised the two of them could stop by her flat so she could at least tell Billy and Mrs. Jenkins that she was otherwise safe.
Renee pondered this as she stood behind the corner, her elbows leaning against the counter for support, her head resting in her hands as she thought that he was here for her.
She glanced down at the chocolate muffin on a plate that she had prepared for him, and the cup of hot, fresh coffee in her other hands. Renee figured since he was going through the painstaking effort of being forced to guard her, it was the least that she could do for him if he had to sit in the same position for hours on end, to provide for him what little sustenance she could manage.
Not that it mattered much. Black had not asked for this, to be stuck on surveillance duty, being forced to babysit her for hours on end, only letting her out of his sight to use the restroom. She sighed.
He would be sitting alone at the corner table looking like he was thoroughly pissed off, as though he would rather be anywhere else but here in this, ah, what did he call it?
"A Muggle joint," Renee whispered, her curiosity intrigued. That's what he had said people like him called establishments, places of business that weren't run by non-magic folk like her. The dark-haired, handsome bloke assigned as her personal guard was admittedly something of a surprise to her.
She had expected the other day an adverse reaction towards her apology, for the way she had treated him, yelling at him, though, if Renee were being honest with herself, he was the one who had started the whole mess, not her. She wasn't sure she would be so forgiving if she had been in his shoes.
But Sirius Black had been cautious around her, careful in his movements and soft in his speech when he spoke.
He had been more than patient with her when she fumbled through her own apology, more so than most. The man had a gentle streak nestled deep within him, completely unexpected, though she supposed she got it from Mr. Lupin, who held a quiet, reserved, polite demeanor.
Though as she thought over the strange shift in Sirius Black's behavior towards her, Renee had forgotten her initial anger towards the wizard for holding her poor throat hostage.
She furrowed her brows into a frown as she thought of Everett.
"Fuck," she whispered hoarsely under her breath as her lips pursed into a thin line. She couldn't bloody believe it.
The man had come into her establishment time and time again, always polite, but now, she was having trouble getting Everett out of her head, and though she had never particularly liked the way the man's eyes had crawled all over her backside, he had never been unkind to her. Always polite. She had been somewhat fascinated before, and even more so since she had given him that cup of water from behind, not knowing at the time, it was him.
She shuddered, the thought plastering under her skin and making it shudder with revulsion at what she had done. Renee had been kind to a murdering piece of filth.
Renee did not know what she could do in order to help Tonks and the others apprehend the man, but she knew he had to be stopped. The more and more she searched, the more frustrated she grew.
Renee felt her blood boil as she thought about that asshole, hoping one of the other wizards got him.
As she strode out from behind the counter, a cup of coffee and muffin in her hand to give to Sirius, whose face, she could tell from the reflection of the café's window, held a forlorn look and he looked, for whatever reason, quite miserable, her mind melted back to thoughts of the Morning Killer. Everett. His eyes had been so dark.
It wasn't even the color that made them so dark, it was what lay just underneath of them.
The relative blankness that rested underneath seemed a cover for the raging sea of emotions that she knew to lay just beneath the surface, and it was up to the man to bring it out. Renee gave her head a curt shake to clear it and cautiously approached Sirius where he stood, glancing down at the small muffin on the plate in her hand and cup of fresh coffee in the offer.
"Pound for your thoughts, Black, what's going on in that head of yours? I've interrupted a deep thought, haven't I? I can see it growing smaller in your eyes," she spoke up quietly, announcing her presence and not wanting to startle the man who seemed to be deep in midst of contemplation. He blinked, startled at the interruption, and looked up.
The corners of his mouth twitched in confusion, but he smiled. Her cheeks burned as she realized she had been staring at the man for longer than was appropriate, her blush intensifying when she realized she had just been asked a question.
"I—I'm sorry," she murmured. "What did you say?" she asked as she slid across the seat of the booth next to him. "I—I guess I, um, spaced out for a second," she confessed.
Sirius waved away her apology with a dismissive wave of his hand as if he didn't care about that and wasn't bothered.
"I asked if you heard anything from your neighbor yet. Your brother, did he make it back safely from school?" Sirius frowned slightly as he glanced at the coffee and chocolate muffin that Renee, without a word, slid across the smooth surface of the table, silently beckoning with her eyes to eat.
"Not yet." Renee frowned in turn at Black's question. She had used the phone on the wall to call Mrs. Jenkins' flat, hoping she had seen Billy safely home from the primary school that he attended, but no answer from her.
Sirius's brows knitted together as he pretended to look out the window, but was in actuality, studying the blonde. He would be the first to admit, he did not know what to say in face of her concerns. She tried her best to hide it, but he could see her reflection in the glass from the window how forlorn and miserable Renee Barreau looked.
Renee was losing hope that she would ever be allowed to return home, and there was not much he could do for her other than serve as her appointed guard and protect her.
"Maybe your neighbor took him out for a walk or something. Went to go get ice cream or something," he said, hoping his words would be of some small comfort to her.
Renee nodded. Her mouth, however, was still set in a tense frown. "You're probably right. I hope you are, anyway."
He merely grunted wordlessly in response, parting his lips open as if he looked as though he wanted to say something, but must have thought better of it and closed his mouth and instead looked out towards the window. Sirius tried his bloody best not to stare at anyone in particular as the pair of them sat together, alone, and for now, the only other patrons in Renee's café.
Though he was not quite sure he would ever fully get used to it again, being able to walk the streets as a free man. Even just three years ago, they would have looked upon him with animosity, and some witches and wizards who knew his face from the 'Wanted' posters of his twelve-year stint in Azkaban, still held eyes of hidden suspicion towards him, but on the whole, the few wizards and witches that did pass by outside the café seemed genuinely interested in what he, Sirius Black, was doing with a young Muggle woman more than anything else.
The witches, Sirius noticed, were eyeing Renee with what looks he could only perceive as venomous, anger, and envy. Sirius focused on whether or not he had ever been in a situation more awkward than this.
His pale gray eyes slid instinctively towards Renee, who was pretending to join him in looking outside through the café's window, but he saw quite easily through its reflection that Barreau was staring at him.
Renee stiffened, her shoulders rising slightly before quickly looking away, furrowing her eyebrows in the process as she began absentmindedly picking at her nails' cuticles.
"For me?" he asked, turning his head back towards the muffin resting idly on the plate in front of him and giving a jerk towards the food and the coffee, and, without waiting for the young blonde restaurant manager to answer him, broke off a piece of the muffin and popped it in his mouth.
The reaction, Renee thought, was immensely satisfying as he made a contented noise in the back of his throat that sounded rather suggestive, causing Renee to blink owlishly at the display of appreciation towards her food like he was in the throes of ecstasy.
"Merlin, this is the best chocolate muffin I've had in…a long time. Complements to the chef," he muttered appreciatively, inclining his head towards Renee, who blushed. "Lupin's going to love this place," he complimented, taking another bite of his muffin. "He's a huge chocoholic," he explained, seeing Renee's confused expression, and she smiled. Sirius blinked, before realizing he had been staring at the young Muggle for longer than he deemed appropriate.
It had been hard not to. Since her insistence that she be allowed to return to work, despite the fact a killer on the loose remained at large and was after her, he'd barely said a word to her, lost in the throes of his own mind, so he had to rely on his vision to see how Renee was taking all of this. It was a lot.
Seeing the Muggle woman staring at him so critically, Sirius felt for the first time in a long time, a desire to be approved of, and he couldn't explain it even if he wanted to.
For once, his appearance was crucial and much to his dismay and confusion, Black found himself sitting straighter, nervous in front of this woman, which he thought unfounded.
"Renee," he blurted out because he could stand the silence any longer. "I understand all of this is confusing and overwhelming to you. I don't know how much any of the others, Lupin, Hermione, have told you, but I just thought…considering the way I treated you the night you fell through my ceiling that you would not want to speak to me, and I thought, well, you would be warranted in that decision, and I wouldn't blame you if that was your choice. But my concern over your well-being is sincere. Will you let me in?"
"What do you mean?" Renee glared at Sirius, narrowing her crystalline blue eyes in the process as she reached up a hand to tuck a strand of blonde hair out of her eyes. "Sirius?"
"She speaks!" Sirius uttered, unable to help the crooked smile beginning to curl at the edges of his lips, thinking that this was perhaps the longest (and friendliest) conversation the two of them had exchanged thus far in their acquaintance.
Renee blushed and purposely looked away from Sirius and out the window as the sun threw beams of light down into the window which shone through and onto Renee's face, only to reveal her blue eyes were glimmering with un-shed tears.
Sirius watched, unable to explain away the churning, swooping feeling in the pit of his stomach, his heart sinking as he heard the girl sniff and brush away her tears gathering with a well-practiced flick of her finger, and avoided Sirius's gaze.
Now, he struggled to find something to say that would put her mind at ease. It might have been easier to comfort the woman if he knew the circumstances of what was on her mind, aside from worrying over if her brother made it home.
"Renee?" Just hearing her name from his lips was enough to inspire a response, as the restaurant manager sanguinely lifted her head and swiveled her gaze around to look at him.
She let him see her face, red-rimmed eyes, cracked at the irises, ashen complexion, dried tear tracts, all of this.
"You can't know for sure if your brother is…gone," he finished lamely, not wanting to speak the troublesome thought. "Whatever happens, you're going to be okay, because I, as your guard, will not let anything happen to you. You hear me?" he emphasized, desperate to make the girl understand.
Of course, he could very well be lying through his teeth, unable to know that for sure, either, but he was certain he could not allow the young woman, with what she knew of Everett, to live without a roof over her head and without any protection. No. He owed it to her after the way he'd treated her, to protect her. He had given Dumbledore his very word.
Blinking away the onset of salty, briny tears, Renee managed a little smile.
"You're right. I—I shouldn't think the worst. Thanks…" She wiped at her cheeks and took in a deep, shuddering but a calming breath. "I need to get hold of myself."
Before Sirius could reply, she reached across the table and swiped a chunk of chocolate muffin off his plate and popped it into her mouth, standing up and brushing her hands on the seat of her black jeans. "Let's take a walk."
Sirius blinked, startled. "Now?" he protested, glancing wildly around, though seemed to relax into the idea as he came to realize he was virtually the only patron in the café.
Renee stared at the man as though he had sprouted antlers out of the top of his head.
"Yes, now," she murmured, shaking her head in minor disbelief, as though hardly daring to believe the words that were coming out of her mouth. "What good is being the owner of this joint if I can't close up and actually use my lunch break? I could use the fresh air."
"Ah, s—sure," Sirius stammered, biting the wall of his cheeks as he inwardly cursed himself for being so nervous.
With that, she nodded, taking a moment to dart around the front counter of the café to secure the register, grab her black purse from underneath the counter and her keys.
Without even waiting for the man to offer, though he would have if she had given him the chance, Renee linked her arm with his once they were outside the restaurant as she had locked it and flipped the sign to 'CLOSED' and let out a sigh.
"Let's take a walk. I could use the air. You could, too," she added, quirking a suspicious brow towards the darkened purple circles under the man's eyes. "C'mon," Renee said.
Their connected reflections danced off the surface of the River Thames. Renee gave Sirius's arm a little light squeeze, almost unconsciously, and it was hard for the man to ignore the swooping sensation in the pit of his nauseous stomach.
It was the same feeling, that same rush of exhilaration he got whenever he had the rare occasion to rush into battle. The last time he had felt this was the Department of Mysteries. And try as he might force the feeling away, to push it to the brink of his mind, it only intensified as Renee winked at him.
As if to say that, since stepping foot outside the restaurant, she was all right now. Sirius blanched, thinking about pulling away from the young blonde but couldn't bring himself to do it. Despite everything, he didn't want to let go.
As they eventually made their way down a side-street away from the riverbank, Barreau held fast to his arm the entire way. A couple of bystanders, a few here and there that Sirius was quick to recognize, Ministry employees on their lunch break, shot the pair of them curious looks, which made his face flush high with color, a mixture of shyness and pride.
She's just being nice, Sirius reminded himself. That's all.
"Black? What's going on with you? You okay?" Renee was watching him out of the corner of her eye with a furrowed brow and a slight frown. Sirius's face flushed a bright pink as he stumbled and stammered over his words before cursing.
"Fine," he barked hoarsely. "Why?" he managed to ask.
"You're looking at me funnily," was all Barreau answered, still noticing him staring at her for longer than was appropriate.
He wasn't sure if this Muggle had perhaps some untapped magical potential within her, after all. Maybe she was a Seer, a mind reader, with her uncanny ability to read him, or if he was just that godawful at hiding his thoughts.
How the bloody hell was he going to smooth talk his way out of this one?
Would he tell Renee that he was bothered by his sudden growing attraction to her because he knew it was hopeless? Insist that he didn't give a goddamn if she didn't feel the beginnings of…whatever 'this' was and have her pity him instead? An escaped convict, lonely after so many years?
For the sake of his sworn duty to protect her, their partnership, however temporary and reluctant it was, Sirius forced himself to push his doubts away and reassure her.
"Fine, Renee. I promise. Just a little lost in thought." He gave her manicured hand coiled around the bicep of his arm a reassuring pat and shot her what he hoped was a kindly smile.
Renee Barreau's hardened expression softened immediately at the man's surprisingly gentle touch, and Sirius swore it was his imagination, but he thought he saw a light pink blush flushing the young blonde Muggle woman's face.
Her eyes narrowed in suspicion, the bright-sky blue cobalt color darkening, almost cerulean in color as she wriggled her eyebrows in what Sirius thought was an endearing way, and as they looked at one another, something unknown flickered through Barreau's eyes. Sirius couldn't quite put a name to whatever emotion it was, but what he did know, was that she was looking rather disturbed suddenly.
"Fine," she muttered, her brow furrowing. "If I could speak freely with you? Can I talk to you?' she asked gravely.
He nodded, not sure what she was going to say, though before she could speak, a loud, all-too-familiar crack! rent the silent air, and as Sirius and Renee collectively whirled around to face the newcomer, the muscles in their shoulders tensing, the pair relaxed as they saw it was only Alastor Moody and the girl, Tonks's cellmate from earlier, both of them were looking surprised to see the pair of them outside of the café, but pleased.
"Good," barked Moody gruffly. "I hoped you'd be here, Barreau. Name's Moody, this is Cate Greengrass. Now that we know each other, we aren't strangers anymore. You gonna let us in? The kid over here needs food. I'm buyin'," he snapped in a gruff voice that matched the rest of his appearance.
Renee's quizzical gaze flitted towards the girl who looked not much older than her and Tonks. She did indeed look like she needed feeding up, Renee thought, furrowing her brows.
"Sure," she murmured, relinquishing her arm from around Sirius's, not seeing the dark-haired man's look of dawning outrage and annoyance as Black shot a withering glower Moody's way, though the grizzled old Auror missed it.
Renee shifted the strap of her purse to her other arm to ease the ache in her shoulder, rolling her neck to crack it as she led the way down the bustling sidewalk, weaving in between the people, wondering how many were like her, normal, and how many weren't. How many were magical.
She supposed it was something she wouldn't ever get used to. Renee glanced sideways out of the corner of her eyes at the new girl, at Cate, who seemed awkward and uncomfortable, as though she wanted to be anywhere else.
Renee didn't bother to stifle down the small smile that tugged at the corners of her lips. "How do a cup of coffee and a chocolate muffin sound, Miss Greengrass?" she asked, smiling at her when the young witch nodded eagerly.
She walked alongside Cate Greengrass in an effort to put the girl her age somewhat at ease in whatever minuscule way she could, though she was completely oblivious to Black's look of anger.
Sirius watched his own feet carry him back towards The Broken Spoon Café, his heart sinking with each of his steps.
As he walked alongside Moody, trying his hardest to ignore Tonks's mentor's magical eye practically piercing a hole in the side of his skull, he tried to ignore his disappointment that Renee Barreau did not take his arm again for the rest of the walk back to her business to let Cate inside.