Chapter 23 – Weathering the Storm
Satine had already fallen asleep when she was awoken by the sound of the commstation in the living room. For a second, she thought about ignoring the call and let the person leave a message. But then a thought struck her mind. Why would someone call her in the middle of the night? Because they were off-worlders. And it was important. Coruscant. The jedi temple. Anakin or Master Che. Maybe even Padme or Ahsoka.
She was wide awake in an instant and almost fell out of bed as she stumbled to her feet in a rush. As she stormed into the living room Satine could already make out the ID of Master Che. That number had burned itself into her head over the past months. Every time something changed concerning Obi-Wan. To the better or worse. Her heart hammered in her chest as she stood in front of the beeping device. What if Obi-Wan died after all this time? She wasn't prepared for that. Or ever will be. 'No', she thought to herself, 'don't think like that.'
Taking a deep breath which didn't help at all to calm her down, she finally answered the call.
"Hello? ", she asked gingerly. The video of the transmission was deactivated. 'Strange'. The temple healer otherwise always showed her face.
There was a short silence on the other end and Satine thought that Master Che maybe had already hung up. But then a voice spoke up, calm but apprehensively.
"Hello Satine." Her heart nearly stopped in her chest and she had to sit down in one of the chairs next to the commstation to keep herself from fainting.
It was him. After all this time. How long she had languished to just hear him speak again. But now, as the moment was finally there… she didn't know what to say. The words got stuck in her throat. Everything was too much. She still couldn't grasp what was happening. Maybe she was still dreaming.
"Obi-Wan?", she whispered, even though it was obvious that it was him.
"Yes, it's me." There was a small rustling sound on the other side of the line and suddenly the hologram popped to life in front of her. The image was shaky and Satine could tell that it wasn't because of an unstable connection. Obi-Wan's hands were trembling.
His features looked gaunt, dark circles underneath his eyes were more prominent than ever before. She couldn't discern if it was because of lack of sleep or stress. It was worrisome to see him like that even though she had seen him right at the beginning this whole ordeal. The bluish shimmer of the transmission let him look even paler than he probably was. As his hair wasn't more than a centimeter long, Satine got a good glimpse on the new scar where the medics had opened his skull to save his life. It hadn't looked good for Obi-Wan at the time and yet here he was. Alive and awake.
"Oh my… when? How are you feeling?" The words tumbled from her mouth before she could get a second thought in.
A small smile appeared on his face. With his chin only covered with a few stubbles, even that looked foreign. The beard had hidden a lot of his facial expressions. Now she could even see the dimples which formed as the corners of his mouth lifted.
"I woke up a little over a day ago. I'm sorry I didn't call you earlier…", he sighed and rubbed neck, "there was a lot to take in in the last few hours. First they tell me that I missed over half a year and then Anakin declares to me that Padme is pregnant with twins."
He huffed an exhausted laugh. "I don't feel like I'm awake. It's more like an unrealistic dream. I'm happy for Anakin though, he always longed for a family. Jedi or not."
Satine chuckled. Typically, Obi-Wan had again managed to dodge the question about his welfare. She could totally understand his confusion, it must be overwhelming to have so many new thrown into his face. Sadly, she wasn't there to witness the face Obi-Wan might have pulled upon his best friend's words. Satine would give almost everything to get a holo from that moment. "Anakin considers you his family. You practically raised that boy, you know that."
"Still that doesn't stop us from arguing", he hummed.
Frowning, she tried to discern what he meant with that. "What happened?"
"I had to tell them about Melida/Daan."
He didn't need to say more because Satine knew the story. It's been a long time ago that Obi-Wan told her about the war and the child army. For a second, she thought that that haunted look flashed through his eyes again. She had seen it on his face almost every time when he returned from one of these dreadful campaigns in the warzones. Obi-Wan had never been made for war.
She winced. Him having to relive this part of his life was definitely partly her fault. Maybe she shouldn't have told Anakin and Ahsoka about the guitar.
"I'm sorry. I haven't thought about it."
Obi-Wan shook his head. "No, it's okay. We promised each other to tell the truth after all. That includes the past. I shouldn't have kept that a secret from the beginning. Perhaps Anakin would have trusted me for once in a while." A rather sad expression crossed his face.
"You're not at fault, Obi. It's understandable that you wanted to forget what happened."
The regret still hadn't left his features and it hurt her to see him like this again. "Honestly, how are you feeling?", before he could even open his mouth, she fixed his gaze, "and don't lie to me."
His eyes lit up a little as he looked at her, while he answered silently. "As if I ever lied to you, Satine."
"And to answer your question…", his shoulders slumped, "I've been better. My head hurts a lot even though the medics are giving me something for the pain. And I can neither walk nor keep my hands from trembling."
"I'm not even awake for two days and I'm already tired of being stuck here", Obi-Wan grumbled.
Satine knew that the jedi master didn't admit that he wasn't feeling well very often. Of course, she asked for his uprightness but still hearing him talk like this was almost disheartening. On the other hand, he almost sounded like himself when he complained about the healing halls.
"I'm sure Master Che is doing her best."
Snorting, Obi-Wan lifted an eyebrow. "That almost sounds like you're in league with the healers now."
"Now you accuse me of treachery, Obi-Wan", Satine laughed heartly.
"Who knows", he chuckled, "but yes, I guess you're right. Master Che said that she wanted to start with therapy tomorrow."
That was good. It meant that the healers already had a plan to help Obi-Wan in his recovery. Satine knew that he had never been a person to sit still and even if he always hated flying, travelling and visiting other planets were things the man loved by heart. It would be terrible if he were to be stuck at the temple. The war just had to end. As Satine had seen it in Obi-Wan and Anakin, even in Ahsoka, who was just a teenager, the war was slowly tearing the jedi's fibers apart. It was easy to lose one's humanity on the way. She could just hope that at the end of all this more than an empty shell remained. That's why she chose to become a pacifist, not just because of the violence but also because of what it to people. Sadly, especially the Mandalorians had an history with taking the bloody way out.
Despite not being physically there, Obi-Wan seemed to catch on her sudden absentness.
"How are things on Mandalore, Satine?", he asked seriously, tilting his head slightly in a gesture she knew so well. The jedi was worried for her.
The blonde bit her lip and averted her gaze. It was true that she had won the debate with the senate. But that didn't mean that her people weren't aggravated by Death Watches' actions. There had been tumults all over Mandalore, people were demanding a new leader as she failed to protect them. Others were affiliating with the 'Old Mandalorian' way now and Satine had to fight hard to keep her supporters.
"We've won the debate but that didn't stop the avalanche that was kicked off…my people are losing their faith in me, Obi-Wan", she said defeated. Inwardly she didn't know what to do and somehow, she even started to doubt her ability to guide Mandalore.
"You have done so much good", he smiled genuinely this time, "Changing things that are deeply rooted inside a system is always difficult. But if someone can weather this storm, then it's you, Satine. I believe in you. Like many others do as well. And as I told Anakin before… I'll have your back when you need me."
"Thanks, Obi."
She watched how he propped himself up on the bed and disentangled his hand from one of the cables which apparently got caught as he moved.
"I missed you."
Obi-Wan stopped fiddling with the cables and looked her in the eye. Even though the video quality was rather poor, Satine could tell that a trace of happiness mirrored in his eyes.
"I miss you too, Satine. I wish I could see you."
"I promise to visit you as soon as I can. To say that we both had to wait long enough is an understatement in my opinion."
"Well, more for you I think", he chuckled, "I've been asleep the whole time."
That brought something up inside of Satine's mind. A question she had asked herself since she had left Coruscant half a year ago.
"Can I ask you something?"
Obi-Wan furrowed his brows in confusion and shrugged his shoulders. " 'Course, just ask."
"Do you remember something from the time you were in the coma?"
The lines of irritation sunk even deeper into his face. "Other than that Sith lord trying to pick my mind apart? No, I don't think so. Why? Should I remember something?", he asked dryly.
So, he didn't knew about her talking to him. Good. That would have been awkward to explain. "I was just curious. Never mind."
Obi-Wan didn't seem to be convinced by that, but didn't object. "If you say so."
Another hint that he was more tired and exhausted than he let on. Normally he wouldn't have let her of the hook that easy. He wasn't the Negotiator for nothing. But maybe his talk with Anakin had worn him down and he didn't want to start another fight.
For once she was glad, he didn't pry further. Although she was sure that Obi-Wan already knew what she was feeling for him. Since the bond formed between them back when they had been kids, Satine knew that they weren't really able to hide their feelings from each other. At least that was true for her part. Obi-Wan was a master in sealing his emotions.
After a while he cleared his throat and shifted again in front of the camera. "Well, I won't keep you up any longer than necessary. I'm sorry I woke you up but I didn't want to wait any longer."
"No, no, it's alright", Satine quickly interjected, "I'm glad you called. I won't need to worry anymore now."
Obi-Wan smiled before ending the call. "See you soon, Satine. And stay safe."
"You too, Obi."
As the hologram flickered off, Satine leaned back in the armchair she had taken residence in. She was filled with relief. Her jedi was safe. At least for now.
The chrono showed 3:00 am. 'Maybe I should try to catch some sleep, now that I have one thing less to worry about', she thought to herself.