36. The Caged Bird Flies Free A/N: -kicks the door open like I'm Emperor Kuzco- BOOM BABY
The shinobi world's technology was more advanced than ever before, having experienced a small technological revolution after the founding of the Hidden Villages. However, this technology was mostly limited to every day uses- that is, they didn't have such constructs as the internet, or the ability to call someone halfway across the world on a telephone. Not yet, at least; they were still limited to messenger birds.
No, most technology ran along the veins of refrigerators, or short-range radios, or television sets, or the bulky, sometimes slow computers used at the hospital to store information. In rare occurrences, such as in the Land of Snow, there were trains and airships and vehicles, even some early forms of guns, but these were, as mentioned, rare.
In just under two short decades, however, skyscrapers would touch the horizon and personal laptops and telephones would decorate the densely populated cities, allowing people to communicate with others who were countries away. (It was a testament to how good village relations were, that the five Kage met in person rather than on a laptop screen.) In those years, a hassled Kazekage and an ornery Hokage would be some of the first users to log on to recreational websites; the Kazekage was hassled because his work was constantly interrupted by the buzz of his phone as his friend tagged him in things he thought were funny and avoided his own work. Amusingly enough, the rise of the meme was something Gaara was quite familiar with, even if his siblings thought him oblivious to it. The first time Naruto visited Suna and greeted him with "Now in west Konoha's where I was born and raised, at the Academy's where I spent most of my days" and Gaara chuckled, Temari and Kankuro experienced a small freak out. The first time Naruto told the Mizukage "Never talk to me or my son again"- much to her confusion- and the Kazekage actually laughed at a Summit, they decided never to poke fun at Gaara about the internet ever again.
And oh, shipping. Did their citizens really think them in the dark about that certain topic? Did the younger populace of Konoha really think Naruto had a "thing" for either red or long hair? (Well. They weren't exactly wrong. But there was still a disturbing- or hilarious, from Naruto's point of view- amount of gossip about him. He had his own tag and everything.)
The Icha Icha fandom was never the same, and Jiraiya had never made so much money.
But we're not to that point yet. Right now, we're still in the era of movie theatres with (in comparison to newer technology) old and outdated projector models, rather than illegally downloading movies and never having to step foot outside your house.
It was in one of these theatres Squad Seven would find themselves the next afternoon, but we're not to that point yet either.
Instead, we find Sakura sitting on her sofa, staring at the tiny television that sat on her coffee table. It wasn't on, and the antennae weren't even extended; she just needed a distraction.
Coughing awkwardly into her fist, she looked up, finally meeting a nervous Ino's eyes. The blonde sat on one of her two chairs fiddling with the hem of her skirt. "So, Ino. What'd you need?"
Their tea sat cold on the table. When Ino had asked to have a private talk with her after their hospital shifts, Sakura had speculated that perhaps she wanted more specialized medical training, or less training, or maybe to ask after Sasuke.
Ino cleared her throat. "Well." She folded her hands, then unfolded them and went back to twisting them in the purple fabric on her thighs. "I wanted to…make a request."
"All right, lemme hear it."
"Well…it's kind of more than one request. You know how the chuunin exams are coming up? Normally they'd choose a different village to hold them in, since Konoha was the last one, but since they got interrupted, they decided to have them here again as a redo and go to Suna next time. I only know because I heard Asuma-sensei talking to Kurenai-sensei."
Damned jounin gossip ring, Sakura thought enviously.
"And I want…I want Asuma-sensei to enter me and Choji," said Ino, licking her lips. Sakura watched her tongue, noting it as a sign of anxiety- a tic she knew in her friend. "I was talking to Karin, and she said she'd be our third, since Team Gai already has three."
"That's nice of her," Sakura noted, taking a sip of cold tea.
"Yeah, but I need to convince sensei I'm ready. They're going to be held in the end of December. That means I only have two and a half months to train, and less to convince him. He…he doesn't think I'm…" Ino trailed off with a wince.
"Ready," Sakura said, expression softening.
"Yeah. So…I need your help."
Thin pink eyebrows rose. "With your medical ninjutsu?"
Ino nodded. "But, but more than that, too. I was thinking…maybe a little with ninjutsu and genjutsu." She rubbed her cheek. "And taijutsu. I train with sensei, but I feel like he goes easy on me sometimes. And he can't train me all the time. And I could ask Gai-sensei, but…" She cringed. "Please, Sakura! You're the only one I can ask," she begged, clasping her hands together.
"Well I'm not saying no," Sakura said, tilting her head with a frown, "but why don't you ask your parents? Your father is an excellent shinobi."
Ino's mouth twisted. "Well, I would, but…"
"Things are tense right now?" Sakura asked.
Ino's brow rose slightly in surprise. "Uh. Yeah, actually. How'd you know?"
Sakura waved a hand around her, smirking dryly. "Things are a little tense with my parents right now too. What's yours' deal?"
"They want me to train more in the clan techniques. I know they didn't fully approve of me signing up at the hospital; they thought I should focus more on our clan jutsu. But Mom also doesn't think I should enter the chuunin exams again for at least a year, maybe more," Ino sighed. "I know Dad doesn't think I'm ready either. No one does."
Sakura couldn't help but feel sympathetic at the glum tone of her friend's voice. She knew Ino's frustration. During her Academy years, everyone pretty much thought she was a useless airheaded fangirl. It wasn't that people underestimated her; they just didn't think she could do anything.
If no one believed in Ino, she would never get better.
"All right, I'll help," Sakura said. Ino's face lit up. "On a few conditions." She raised one finger, making the other girl pause. "First, do what I say, when I say. I'm not implying you don't have a say in your training regimen- you get to help me iron things out if you don't like what I plan out initially- but I've been doing this a long time, and things will get tough, tougher than you've ever known. Believe me, I know. You can't back out on me in a week."
Ino nodded, determination flitting across her expression. "I swear. I won't give up. I'll do whatever you say."
"Good. Secondly, I'm not your sensei. We're still equals outside our rank. We're still friends. I don't want you thinking I'm infinitely better than you or treating me like Kurenai-senpai or Gai-sensei. I'm just Sakura."
"Okay," Ino allowed, a tad uncertainly. "Just Sakura."
"Third, Sasuke." Ino tensed. Sakura noticed. "I don't care if you still have feelings for him. He's basically my brother, and Lee and I are going to get married someday. But you have to understand you can never allow those feelings to interfere in your shinobi career. You can't put Sasuke before your team, but more importantly, you can't put Sasuke before yourself. Sasuke isn't interested in romance, but even if he were, he would never date someone who saw him as more important than themselves or neglected their training for him. He would want- no, need- an equal. You can't diet for Sasuke, or spend an hour on your hair for Sasuke, or dress pretty for Sasuke. You create a diet for optimal physical health. You take five minutes or less to tie your hair so it doesn't get in the way because believe me, your schedule will be full. You dress for training or for maximum protection and maneuverability on missions. Do you understand me?"
"Yes," Ino muttered, eyes on the table.
"Louder. I'm not your commanding officer, but I can't even hear you. Do you understand me?"
"Yes," Ino said, firmer, meeting her eyes again. "I get it. I won't let Sasuke interfere."
Sakura smiled, setting her cup down. "Good. That brings me to point number four, which you've already done. Always, always be honest with me, Ino. Don't tell me you did your sit-ups when you didn't. You won't get in trouble; we'll just have to re-do tomorrow's training to compensate. Don't lie to me about how you spend your time. The only goal here is to make you stronger, and to do that, I need your honesty. Got it?"
"Yes. I promise I won't lie about anything."
"Good. Now what was the other part of your request?"
"Ah, right. You…train with that Anko lady a lot, don't you?"
"Yes. TenTen and I both."
"Right. Well, I was wondering if…you could help me with something. She used to work in the Torture and Interrogation Division, right?"
"She did. She technically isn't a part of the Division anymore, but torture is one of her tokubetsu specialties, and she consults and helps them from time to time."
"I was wondering if she would teach me."
Sakura stilled, expression showing her surprise. "Teach you…torture," she said, just to make sure she'd heard right.
Ino nodded. "Yes. The Ino-Shika-Cho formation is excellent for trapping and capturing people, but we're stuck after that. Normally I would use the Yamanaka techniques to get information like my dad does, but I want to do…more. What if they don't work? What if I don't know the technique?"
"Well, I could ask," Sakura said. "But Anko-senpai values being upfront and having guts, so I think you'd have better luck asking yourself."
"C-could you introduce us, then?"
"Absolutely. I'll bring you along to our next training session. And Karin. I might as well include her in our little train-fest. She needs to be stronger for the exams, too."
Sakura retrieved a large notepad from her bookshelf and picked up a pen. "I'll start making a schedule. Two, actually. One is for you to do by yourself. When I'm not there, you still have to exercise and train. I'll give you morning exercises, afternoon exercises, and evening exercises, as well as some light in-between exercises. The second schedule will be ours. If you're willing to get up at four in the morning, you can go on my morning run with Karin and I before I start my hospital shift. What time does your team meet up?"
"Asuma-sensei meets us at noon, usually at the barbecue joint."
"Great. You can train in the mornings with me. I head over to the hospital at 4:45 to spend some time in the archives studying poisons and diseases. I usually catch breakfast at the cafeteria and take a shift until 7:30. After that I train until ten, usually with TenTen, Karin, and/or Anko, depending on their schedules. Lunch is at eleven, because my second hospital shift starts at twelve. If I'm not on a mission, the shift ends at four, and I train until seven, when I start winding down. I go to bed at eight so I can get up early, unless I have a midnight shift at the hospital. In that case I just catch a nap."
Wow, Ino thought, a little intimidated. "Can I move my hospital shifts to the morning with yours?"
"I'll switch them around. When we're both in village, I'll assign some time in the afternoons to train, instead of working at the hospital. You can also come over in the evening for some one-on-one medical training." Sakura had taken on two other medic students since Ino, one of which was Sasuke. He was making much better progress under her tutelage.
"Okay."
"I'll also need to create a specialized diet for you. It's important to cut down on sugar and make sure you get enough fiber and protein. I'll give you some nuts and dried fruit to snack on during the day. Don't get cheap brands; they add salt and sugar." Sakura's hand moved a mile a minute on several pieces of paper. "To start, we'll be doing endurance training before any jutsu training. Building up your physical endurance and strength will naturally increase your chakra. Then, we'll start with smaller jutsu and intense chakra control exercises to build your chakra. Training with TenTen and I will give me more time to teach you how to use that sword I got you. But we won't be focusing too much on that, because they take a long time to learn how to use. Taijutsu is much more important; you can lose a sword, but not your hands and feet. Well, technically you can lose your hands and feet, but you know what I mean. Mastering kunai, senbon, shuriken and trapping is also extremely underestimated but extremely useful. After about a month, I think you'll be ready to learn some more taxing jutsu. Medical ninjutsu also takes a very long time to learn, but you have a natural talent for it, so I think by the exams you'll at least be able to heal smaller wounds for your teammates. I'll give you a prep course on basic fuinjutsu for storage seals- maybe get Naruto to help- so you can carry food rations and herbs more effectively. If you can't use medical ninjutsu, herbal remedies are the next best thing; some can draw poisons out of the body and relieve pain, among other things. I think you'll also have a talent for genjutsu. I'm sure we can get Kurenai-senpai and Sasuke to spend their weekly training sessions with us. I'm warning you now, though, Anko-senpai likes to hang out in the Forest of Death, and any 'fresh meat' as she'll say, will have to escape a giant snake while she laughs. Don't worry, it's not as bad as it sounds."
Ino nodded along vigorously as she spoke, listening attentively. If she was being honest, leaving the house so early actually sounded nice; she wouldn't have to deal with her mother's disapproving hums and the awkward air at the breakfast table.
"Oh, and hey, Ino," Sakura said, pausing uncertainly, "if you ever need somewhere to just, ah, catch your breath- or- or to get a break from…" She waved her hands. "You know. You can come over anytime."
"Really?" Ino asked, trying not to act too surprised.
"Yeah. I…the television isn't that large, and it's not like I have a lot to do…but I do keep ice cream stockpiled in the freezer, to, you know, cheat on my diet," Sakura said, smiling. Ino felt herself mirroring the expression, a sensation she hadn't felt in a long time warming her chest. "And I get this one really funny channel around ten o'clock at night that's sort of like the Konoha gossip show. They talk about everything from tourist locations to jounin couples. No one really watches them, so they have bad ratings, but they've somehow stayed on the air anyway; last week they were speculating on whether the 'Sarutobi heir had a lover'."
Ino giggled. "I think I know the answer to that. That sounds…fun, Sakura."
"Ah, great! I'll…draw up a schedule on the printer at the hospital, but you can have these for now." Sakura licked her thumb and tore out the papers she'd written up, handing them to Ino. "We've only got two months, but if I'm going to do anything, I'm going to turn you and Karin into the most badass kunoichi in our year. Besides me, of course," she winked.
Ino laughed. A weight had been lifted from her shoulders, leaving her more carefree than she'd been in weeks. She hadn't known what she was going to do or what direction she was going, but with Sakura- well, the chuunin wasn't exactly planning things out for her or telling her what to do with her life; she was just…being there. Being there to support Ino when she had no one else to ask what to do. Someone outside her parents or team she could turn to.
"Thanks, Sakura."
"Anytime."
Getting village funding was easier than Sasuke had thought it would be.
He hadn't told Naruto or Sakura his plan yet; he wanted it to be a surprise. He did have two very specific positions planned out for them, after all.
The old building that had once been the Uchiha Police Corps had been demolished a long time ago, so a new plot of land had to be acquired. He was able to buy off several stores along with empty space, at a discounted price no less.
The Hokage Tower and the Academy were very near to the Hokage Monument. The hospital was within sight of them; the new police headquarters would form a triangle with them, located on the same street as the library and many other shops. The new building would take up most of the plot, with a high fence surrounding it on all sides and two main gates. There would be a flagpole that extended high into the air so anyone could find it.
He was fully confident security would be much better than it had been. With Naruto around, he would be able to add extensive security seals- not just to the building and property itself, but also to each individual cell, the confiscated weapons room, and anywhere containing confidential or sensitive information. He would have to tell Naruto eventually, of course, so he could add protection seals- in case of fire or other disaster- as the workers were constructing the building.
Right now, however, he was simply clearing the property.
"It does not occur to most people to clear out the wildlife when demolishing an area, much less the insect life," intoned the man standing next to him. He'd been a bit intimidating at first- not in the way his father had been, but in the way that Sasuke didn't know much about him and he was intimidating in how quiet he was. Quiet people always noticed everything. Strangely enough, though, he felt more trustworthy than anything- it felt secure standing with him; something Sasuke rarely felt with comrades outside his friend circle.
He shrugged. "You can thank Naruto."
"Uzumaki?"
"He loves insects," Sasuke explained. The two Aburame in front of them had their arms spread out, calling all insects off the plot of land he'd bought. "Well, more like it's one of his obsessions." Grimacing slightly, he tried to reign in his dislike of certain bugs. "He feeds the cockroaches that get in the house." He had a feeling he let them in on purpose, too, because his seals were supposed to keep them out.
"I see." Sasuke had a feeling that was this man's version of 'Interesting'.
"We're finished, Shibi-sama," one of the Aburame called out. Somehow, she was quiet even when raising her voice.
Sasuke motioned to the manager of the construction crew. She nodded in reply and signaled the workers running the machinery to start knocking down buildings and cutting down trees.
"Thank you for your help," Sasuke said politely.
"It was our pleasure, Uchiha-san." Sasuke felt like the man was evaluating him. He hadn't asked for anything in return for their help; simply heard him out and agreed. "If I may ask a question."
"Anything you'd like within reason," Sasuke replied, still in the same congenial tone.
"It's about Uzumaki-san. This is less of a question, and more of an observation," Shibi went on, revealing nothing behind his glasses and coat. "No one seems to know anything about him."
Sasuke raised an eyebrow. To someone not versed in looking underneath the underneath, Shibi might have seemed as if he disapproved of Naruto in some way. However, Sasuke knew Aburame were intelligent; Shino's father had been one of the only parents who didn't actively encourage his child to shun Naruto. Rather, he deduced the man was simply curious about the person who'd taken an interest in his son. No doubt he knew many from Shino's age group either avoided him or didn't notice him.
"Besides a very few select people, you included."
"What do you want to know about him?" Sasuke asked, tipping his head back to stare at the sky and trying to keep the amusement out of his tone. He had a feeling he was failing.
"What would you be willing to divulge?"
A very small smirk appeared on his face. "What do you already know?"
Shibi was silent for a moment as he thought back to the council meeting and the extreme contrast it made with the behavior Naruto had exhibited in the years before. "He is much more intelligent than he leads people to believe."
"Very."
"I suspect his prowess in battle and intelligence naturally lend themselves to a tactical genius that is slightly unconventional."
"His schemes are at times knuckleheaded but oddly effective, yes."
"He has a very rigid moral code and is rather vindictive towards those who he perceives as breaking it."
"That's one way to put it."
"There seems to be a barrier around him that is not impossible to penetrate, but rather selective in who it lets in."
"He has a Friend Collection."
"Shino enjoys his company." Ah, finally getting to the point.
"He's in the Friend Collection, yes."
"Is this within reason, Uchiha-san?"
Sasuke let the silence linger for a moment. "Naruto is unerringly loyal to his friends. He would never do anything that put innocent people in danger, but if it came down to going against respected powers or saving a friend, his choice is rather obvious. I don't think it could take him down." Respected powers and 'it' being the village. Shibi understood. "That scares some people, and it might seem like I'm exaggerating, but he's a bit like his bombs himself. If he were to go off, no one caught in the blast zone would stand a chance, and he would self-destruct if he felt backed into a corner."
"I see."
Sasuke couldn't help but inwardly chuckle. Couldn't just come out and ask if someone was a good friend for his son; no, he had to play the game.
Something occurred to him. Naruto knew many ghosts; Naruto knew ghosts from the Aburame. "Shibi-san."
"Yes?"
This could turn potentially dangerous. If he said the wrong thing- the wrong incriminating thing- or if he was wrong about Shibi…
"Do you have experience with the advisory council?" He left out key words. They could be an advisory council towards anyone.
He wondered if the question threw Shibi at all. "As much as a clan head would."
"You've been in that seat long enough to have experience with the old one, then."
A beat of silence.
"Before the numbers changed, yes."
"I'm sure they've all got our best interests at heart," Sasuke said vaguely. His eyes slid towards the man, deceptively empty. "Know anyone who's ever done anything that could be perceived as breaking a rigid moral code?"
"Such as?"
"I'm sure that discussion would take a long time. A tree's roots always extend farther than what you see on the surface." Sasuke turned to look at him with a meaningfully blank look on his face. "Sometimes farther than anyone would have ever thought to imagine, in the places you'd last expect."
He smiled, polite and calm. "Thank you for your assistance, Shibi-san. I'm sure the foundation of the new Police Corps will be strong."
He turned on his heel and walked away.
"And then he went flying straight into the pile of dung the dogs had left," Tsume guffawed, shoulders shaking with the force of her laughter. Naruto couldn't help but do the same, nearly choking on his drink.
The street-goers bustled around them as they ambled in the vague direction of the Hyuuga compound. He still had an hour before he had to arrive, so he wasn't worried about the time.
"Oh, gee, I wonder why he never told me thatstory," Naruto chuckled, nearly wheezing.
"Kuromaru and Akamaru just stood there laughing at him. Probably one of his moments he wants to keep under wraps."
Naruto had been afraid their interactions would be awkward; fortunately, he got along with Tsume much the same way he got along with Kiba. They were quite alike, after all.
However, he still knew when he was being evaluated. The only conclusion he could come to was that Tsume had at some point decided there wasn't any cause for concern.
"All right, kiddo, lemme see," Tsume said, pausing and planting her hands on her hips. "Kiba's been telling me about this ninken you have. Haven't seen him around."
"Oh, yeah," Naruto said, reaching up to bite his thumb. "Probably off napping, as usual."
He pressed his palm to the ground, leaving off the verbal cue. He doubted "Kuchiyose no jutsu: Kyuubi" would go over well.
Kurama appeared in a puff of smoke. "What's the deal?" he growled, leaping onto Naruto and latching his jaws onto his head. "I was busy!" he said around the blond's hair.
"Hey! Get off, you dimwit!" He tried to pull Kurama off, but only succeeded in getting a back paw to the eye. Vaguely, he heard Tsume laughing. "What do you even have to be doing anyway?!"
"I was reading!"
Naruto yanked him away, scowling. He dropped him at his feet and gave him a disapproving look that made Kurama think of the Nidaime. "This is Tsume-san," he said pointedly. "Tsume-san, this is Kurama."
Kurama looked up at her with squinted eyes, tail flicking back and forth. "Yo," Tsume drawled, kneeling down and extending her hand.
Kurama leaned in her general direction and made a show of examining her scent, scanning for any ill intent. When he found none, he raised one paw lazily. "Yo."
He leapt onto Naruto's shoulders, winding his tail around his neck like a second scarf. Naruto inwardly rolled his eyes.
"How old is he?" Tsume asked, amused.
"Uh…" One thousand, one hundred and twenty-two. "A year old."
"Hm, usually they're a bit bigger by now."
"He's a slow bloomer," Naruto replied.
Kurama pulled his lips back to show his teeth. "Who're you calling a slow bloomer?"
"But he can talk; that usually takes longer," Tsume went on. "Maybe he's just a small one." She grinned widely, showing off her canines as Kurama sulked. "Feel free to bring him over to dinner. I'm sure the dogs will like him."
And she was sure the dogs would know what, exactly, was going on with these two, and if the Kyuubi was posing any danger to her cousin. She'd be damned if Kushina's kid was in trouble right under her nose.
Naruto realized that being so viciously petty probably wasn't befitting of someone of his station and came off as unprofessional. However, it was also fun, and this outweighed most logic in his mind.
Even Sasuke probably would have given in to some amount of pettiness in his situation, however.
Today, his mission was "make Main Branch members feel as crappy as humanly possible, sans Hinata and Hiashi".
Due to his obliviousness it didn't occur that some Side Branch members may feel as though he were pitying of them, or think him the type of person who went around extending patronizing charity and expecting those he helped to worship the ground at his feet.
Fortunately, he avoided this outcome at all; as he removed the seals from their bodies, emphasizing how easy it was, he (unintentionally) ignored the owners of the foreheads at his fingertips completely. He was so focused on passive aggressively addressing any Main Branch members around that it was apparent he didn't pity anyone. He was just sadistic.
The only thing people could assume about him was that he was vindictive and bitter at the existence of the cursed seal at all, which made the Side Branch members support him more than anything else.
"Wow," he said in a falsely amazed voice, staring straight at a Main Branch member who had been looking pretty pissed off at him, "it's almost like it was made by amateurs with how easy it comes off."
He didn't even know whose forehead he was removing the seal from. There was a line of Hyuuga that stretched all the way around the corner of the building he stood in front of; someone had brought him a bench to sit on, but he felt awkward enough with each of them kneeling for him (damned height). Sakura stood beside him with her arms crossed behind her back like a bodyguard, face set in stone. She was the medic sitting in for him in case anyone was injured during removal. So far she'd only had to alleviate a young girl's slight headache.
"What a world we live in where humanity comes up with something the demon in your gut thinks is barbaric," Naruto hummed, wearing a patronizing smile as he gazed at the same Main Branch member. He went rigid as a board, resolutely not looking at Naruto from his post. Hiashi had put him there to oversee things, but Naruto thought the clan head was just being petty like he was. Just in a more subtle way.
A few people in line tensed, but everyone in earshot was an adult; they already knew about his "special status".
He turned back to the next Hyuuga, catching the barest hints of a smirk as the woman knelt down. "Thank you, Uzumaki-sama," she said as he placed a hand on her forehead.
"Uh? Oh, you mean me, uh, you don't have to call me that."
"Uzumaki-san, then."
"Eh, good enough."
Her headband was held tight in her hands. She was stoic, but he saw them shaking; not out of fear but excitement. He could feel it shimmering in her like the waves of the ocean. He ignored his verbal tongue-lashing for a moment, staring straight at her forehead as he raised one hand and brought his fingers together, like he was manipulating puppet strings.
A pentagram with a spiral formation laid inside the circle appeared over her cursed seal, starting to spin around clockwise. Slowly, it moved outwards, floating in midair and taking the lines on her forehead with it. The cursed seal deconstructed into three layers- the inner workings that weren't visible to the naked eye and were hidden beneath the clean, simple design that normally showed on their foreheads.
Part of the layers held a spiral design Naruto recognized. It was the design he'd trademarked.
"Oh, look there, how illegal," he said in a carefree way. "Too bad they used something against the law."
The Main Branch member flinched and gritted his teeth. This time, the woman's face broke out into a full-blown smirk.
The line of Hyuuga- and even some who had already had their seals removed, gathered in a small group out of the way- watched in silence the seal was drawn out of her forehead. It seemed it never got old for them.
With a snap, the cursed seal was drawn fully into his pentagram. The next part was his favorite; before their eyes, his seal crushed the Caged Bird seal like cheap paper, folding in on itself until only chakra was left to evaporate.
"Thank you, Uzumaki-san," the woman said again, slight awe in her voice. He gave her a cheerful eye-smile as she got up and bowed to him, turning to walk towards the front gates and pausing beside the Main Branch member with a smirk. "I look forward to our next spar, Kanaye. This time as equals."
Kanaye shot her a scathing glare. She walked away with her head held high, wrapping her headband around her arm to showcase her clean forehead.
Naruto turned to the Main Branch member who'd come up beside him from within the building. "Don't you just love seeing oppressive assholes being humiliated in public?"
The woman twitched at him and quickly walked away. He'd gone easy on the members who hadn't taken any pleasure in the Side Branch's predicament, but purposely targeted those he felt negative emotions from.
"What's going on?" a new voice asked from several yards away. Naruto looked up and beamed, spotting Team Gai in the entrance to the compound; they'd left for a mission the day before.
TenTen had spoken. Lee was looking around in confusion next to her, while Neji flanked her other side with a startled expression. He recognized several of his relatives milling about around him, foreheads clean and blank as the day they were born.
A Branch member paused to pat Neji on the shoulder. "A day of liberation," he said in a placid tone, holding himself with more ease than before.
"Oh, hey! Neji!" Naruto called with a wave. Sakura smirked next to him. Team Gai turned to face them, eyebrows shooting up- which was quite dramatic for Lee. Naruto turned to the next in line and smiled apologetically. "You don't mind if someone cuts to the front real quick, do you?"
"No. We will wait patiently, Uzumaki-san." The woman behind the man who'd spoken nodded in agreement.
"Thanks. Come over here, Neji!"
"Holy crap," TenTen whispered. She quickly shoved a stunned Neji by the shoulders, pushing him towards the line. "Hurry up! Get over there!"
Stumbling, Neji quickened his pace until he'd come to a stop in front of Naruto, lowering himself to his knees. Naruto held out his hand and starting drawing the seal from his forehead, while TenTen and Lee looked on in mute awe.
Neji stared wide-eyed as the pentagram crushed his curse to nothing. Sakura held out a mirror she'd been holding and letting every member use, and he took it with slightly shaky fingers to stare at his face. For a moment all he did was stare, sheer disbelief blatant in his expression.
"Uh, Neji? You okay?"
"Somehow, I didn't expect this event to actually come about," he said, quiet. The Hyuuga elders had been stubborn when it came to Naruto and Jiraiya examining the seal; legally, they had to allow it, but they'd intimidated most Branch members behind the scenes into not stepping forward. It had come as a surprise when Naruto and his teacher had come forth with such an in-depth analysis.
The reason for that being Naruto had studied Neji's seal in secret under the guise of joint training sessions with Squad Seven and Team Gai.
"Naruto."
Naruto raised an eyebrow. "Yeah?"
Sakura politely took the mirror back before he dropped it, pressing forward to wind his arms around the blond's shoulders with an almost desperate intensity. "Thank you," he breathed shakily; Naruto's eyes went wide in surprise, and he awkwardly raised the arm not trapped between them to return it.
"Hey, you're my friend. I couldn't just…do… nothing…"
Neji quickly let go of him, stepping aside so the next Hyuuga in line could step forward. "Thank you," he said again, promptly making Meaningful Eye Contact before he turned and walked back towards his team, holding his head high in a way Naruto hadn't seen him do since he'd been an arrogant jerk. This time, however, it wasn't out of arrogance.
Naruto registered himself grinning as he continued the process, but he was too focused on the warm feeling spreading in his chest to notice Kanaye standing in the shadow of the compound gate, watching him with narrowed eyes.
The shinobi world's technology was more advanced than ever before, but news still took time to travel. Considering it had only been three months since Squad Seven's chuunin exam, it was understandable that some of the gossip had only just started to pick up, because it was after Team Seven became chuunin that they started to "get crap done", in Naruto's words.
Most of the major countries, now, knew the Uchiha were back in the political sphere, even if their clan had a grand total of one. The fact that two Uzumaki now resided in Konoha, one of whom was the clan leader, was also widely known. A bingo book entry with a flee-on-sight order was also helpful in getting the word out.
Of course, villages don't list their own shinobi in their bingo books, so by the time one of their jounin brought in a foreign one off a rogue nin he'd taken out, many foreign nin were already more wary of Naruto than some of the ninja from his own village. The upside to this was that the Uzumaki had a reputation now- their leader wasn't a wishy-washy, weak, unknown face; their leader was a powerful shinobi with an S-rank warning on his shoulders, and his closest ally was the Uchiha. Sasuke himself had finally gotten a B-rank bingo book entry, as well as Sakura- she may not have been as well-known clan-wise, but she was still the Hokage's apprentice, and they both had gone on many missions themselves- solo or otherwise. Their sensei's fame was beginning to transfer over, as "Team Kakashi" had a reputation for being the prodigies of their year. (Kakashi himself had their bingo entries taped to his fridge, but no one needed to know about that.)
To surviving Uzumaki clan members, this said security. Safety. Strength. It didn't send the message "We're struggling to regroup." It said "I'm spearheading the clan's restoration, and my team and I will crush anyone who gets in my way." (It was no secret even Tsunade herself had ties to the Uzumaki, anyway.)
In the village itself, there began to be an almost constant stream of gossip concerning Squad Seven.
Did you hear that boy is a clan head now? Did you hear the Uchiha boy is clan head now too?
They're all chuunin now.
Tsunade-sama took the girl for her own student. She's already a full medic. I don't even know what her name is. I heard she was clanless. Did you see what she did to Training Ground Four? Remember her match during the chuunin exams? She has pink hair of all things!
The Uzumaki kid destroyed the Hyuuga's Cursed Seal. Did you hear they're being considered for tokubetsu jounin? Only seven months out of the Academy! That has to be a record.
My cousin just came from Wave. He said that boy decimated the landscape.
I wouldn't expect anything less from Kakashi Hatake's students. Of course the one team he took would turn out like this. People are saying they're the next sannin.
Sasuke tended to ignore it, because of the fact that people tended to suggest it looked as if he was the "Orochimaru of his group". He hadn't even done anything vaguely Orochimaru-like. But people were stubborn in their behavior, and drew parallels between Squad Seven and the sannin. Anyone could see Sakura was like Tsunade in many ways; Naruto wasn't in any way perverted like Jiraiya, but he tended to take after his hermit-like ways, and people could rarely get a glimpse of him. It didn't help he dressed like the man now.
Fortunately, no one seemed to think he was going to betray the village or was actually like Orochimaru…they just thought the snake would end up abducting him at some point to make him his protégé. Screw gossip.
Of course, some…other rumors were circulating as well. Specifically to do with Orochimaru's intentions towards him. Eventually, Leaf nin started to remember Naruto's not-so-quiet "You tried to take Sasuke's virginity in the forest!" and the "I just want his body!" Sure, it had been during the middle of an invasion, but several ANBU had been just sitting outside the Kage box's barrier, and the Mizukage spared no details when talking about the invasion in her home country. Unfortunately for Sasuke, it seemed to fuel his fangirls' fire. They thought they needed to "fix" him and "protect him from the bad snake man". He'd taken to walking around with TenTen just to scare them off.
Screw gossip.
The only upside was people seemed to have an even lower opinion of Orochimaru than they'd had before.
The most surprising part was Sakura seemed to have developed a small group of fanboys and a few fangirls. Well, that and a larger group of separate fangirls. The fanboys and their portion of fangirls were obsessed with her in the same way Sasuke's were obsessed with him. The other fangirls were simply admiring of her as a kunoichi; just fans. Either way, both groups often sent her gifts or tried to get her attention; some of them faked illnesses or injuries to try and get her to treat them. Most of them were Academy students and genin; it was irritating either way- especially, in Sakura's opinion, with the males younger than her who thought they could impress her and she would fall over herself trying to date them. She didn't know how, but she had somehow become the most popular kunoichi of her age group.
But still. It pissed her off when she overheard them (mostly the fanboys) commenting on her "feminine, gentle" appearance and how she needed to be protected. It made her even more irritated when they were disappointed when they saw how "buff" she was. In passive aggressive retaliation, she always wore a sleeveless winter vest with fur around the collar, and winter gloves lined with the same fur that came up to her elbow just so they were forced to see her muscles whenever they saw her. Immature? Maybe. Satisfying? Definitely.
She was more forgiving and kind towards the fans, especially to the kunoichi and Academy students younger than her who just admired her skills and saw her as a role model. Sometimes she forgot that being the Hokage's apprentice wasn't usually an easy-to-acquire station. The last person who'd stepped into an apprentice-type role was the Sandaime.
Naruto thought the whole thing was hilarious and often laughed at her and Sasuke about it. He said the one good thing about being the village pariah was that almost no one was a fangirl or fanboy for him. Both of his teammates envied how he had avoided the pitfalls of hero worship; the only thing that came close was Konohamaru's team and their admiration of him, but they were easy to deal with.
Naruto would get his comeuppance for laughing. In a few years, he would have his fair share of fans himself- and with the rise of the internet…well, that's best left unelaborated on. Let it be said that only the more risqué fan material or when people speculated on his emotional issues bothered him- he was an absolute troll, and anonymously egged on the shippers. "SasuNaru" made him laugh for hours, and he often shared "headcanons" about "SakuLee" that were actual truths, managing to piss Sakura off even more. Adult-Naruto often sent Sasuke and Sakura links to fanfictions about them, leading to angry rants and objects thrown into walls. The day he discovered what OT3 meant wasn't a good day for anybody.
For now, though, the gossip about one Uzumaki Naruto was limited to his tendency to make large areas disappear and his current clan head status.
The fall air was cold, and in many places, snow had even started to fall, despite winter still being a few months away. Konohagakure was enjoying cool temperatures in the fifties and sixties, dipping down to the thirties at night and occasionally entering the forties at various points in the week. To a traveler with no money for shelter, forced to spend day after day in the cold, however, these temperatures were anything but pleasant. Even as they approached the border to Fire Country, significantly warmer than the practically freezing temperatures of the Land of Frost, where they'd travelled from, they shivered uncontrollably and kept up a light jog to try and keep warm.
The road was full of twigs and fallen leaves from the bare trees, making it hard to do so barefoot. It was a sheer miracle they hadn't lost any toes; the seals painted on their heels were working overtime to spread warmth.
The traveler kept up the fastest pace possible towards Konoha; towards safety and a warm bed.
Long red hair swayed in the wind.
"Now, I realize, that the regulations and rules concerning such matters take precedence. However, it's also rather easy to pick up a pen and write out a quick note for a bird to take~ even just a few sentences! Knowledge is important, after all. Especially when it involves your precious students possibly getting promoted! Why, I couldn't even celebrate with them afterward. Isn't that sad?"
The chuunin gulped, shaking in his boots. He'd sat through torture sessions with Ibiki, but nothing he'd seen was quite as scary as how cheerful Kakashi was.
"Geez, Hatake, we get it," Anko snorted from the other side of the room. "You wanted to be here for your little brats' torture day. They gotta grow up some time, you know."
Kakashi turned to her with an eye-smile. "Anko-san, how would you feel if someone didn't tell you important things? Not very happy, I would imagine!"
Inwardly rolling his eyes, Ibiki waved the chuunin out of the room. "Go on, get out of here. He's having a mid-sensei crisis."
The chuunin of the TI Division began filing out, trying and failing to look like they weren't fleeing.
"D-does he have to hold that thing the whole time?" one of them whispered.
"I just thought I'd let you know," Kakashi continued. "Because it's important information, and I'd hate for you to miss out on that."
"You're passive aggressive as fuck, you know that, Hatake?"
Kakashi's eye curved even more, but there was something threatening in it this time. Anko was reminded of a time when they were kids, when she'd made some insensitive remark about Obito, and he'd glared at her with a look in his eye that wasn't so much frightening as it was just plain intense.
"I should be going," he said, checking his non-existent watch. "I have a mission with my cute little students tomorrow."
"Are you seriously going to stand there holding that the whole time?"
"We're going to the Land of Snow," Kakashi said, purposefully ignoring her question just to tick her off. "I'll make sure to send a messenger bird if I have any important information."
"God, we get it already! Just leave, would ya? And put that thing out!"
"Oh, right." He glanced down at the chidori in his hand. "I was just testing how long I could hold it."
"Sure."
His hand snapped forward to strike the table. It split beneath his attack, splintering and sagging, and a few of the chuunin who'd been looking in through the door cringed. "There we go," he said, turning for the door with a cheerful air as he got his book out.
"You're paying for that," Ibiki called dryly as he left. They all knew he wouldn't pay for it.
"You can't come with me," Naruto said, amused, as Tatabi batted at his coat. "You're a cat. It's a compound full of dogs."
Tatabi made a jealous noise, looking pointedly at Kurama, who'd taken up his usual position around Naruto's shoulders. "He's a fox. He's kind of a dog."
"I'm not a dog," Kurama muttered, shooting a glare down at the cat on the back of the couch.
"You're related. Anyway, you should stay inside. You can't jump very far yet and I don't want any dogs going after you thinking you aren't allowed there."
Tatabi hissed, turning and leaping onto the couch cushions to burrow into the corner. "Sulk if you want," Naruto chortled.
Sasuke rolled his eyes from the other end of the couch. A large leather binder was in his lap, filled with various papers and floor plans. He wore the glasses Naruto had made him to take the strain off his eyes, which magnified the tiny print on some of the papers. On the end table sat a plate of leftovers he'd heated up. "What time you think you'll get back?"
"Not sure, but probably around nine? I don't know how long Kiba will want me to stay. His mom's nice, but I don't know how early she turns in."
Voices floated in from the open sliding door leading to the training ground behind the house and down the hall to the living room. "Sakura have Ino over?"
"First day of training."
"For what?"
"Chuunin exams this December."
"I thought they were in Suna."
"No, they're having a redo, apparently. Karin's going to fill Shikamaru's spot on Team Ten."
Naruto nodded, thinking of his cousin, studying in the house across from them. "She's pretty good, but I know Sakura will make her more ready than she is now."
"Let's hope the same goes for Ino. They've only got roughly two months," Sasuke said, eyes perusing the floor plan for the jail cells.
"I'm sure they'll be fine. If anything, I'm more worried about Choji. Heard anything from him lately?"
"No. He's quite busy training himself, I hear. But even so, he'd be more likely to visit you, not me."
Naruto tossed a book at him. "That's because you aren't sociable unless it benefits you in some way."
"I'm plenty sociable," Sasuke argued, catching the book before it hit him. Tatabi yawned and stretched out, taking up a whole cushion.
"Name one person besides me, Sakura, or TenTen you regularly spend time with in our age group."
Sasuke opened his mouth and paused.
"See? You should get out more."
"Says you, the hermit," Sasuke retorted.
Naruto shrugged. "I've just found it's kind of nice having friends. I didn't have the energy to bother before graduating, but they're pretty cool. Shino, Neji, Kiba-"
"Well, I'm too busy." Sasuke raised his papers again.
A hand on the top edge pushed them back down. Naruto gave him a wry stare. "I'm not saying quit working, idiot. But you push yourself to exhaustion too often. Just take a break once in a while, yeah?" Sasuke paused, considering. "Like tonight. Just tonight. Go do something fun."
"Fun," Sasuke repeated.
"Yeah. Fun. Go to dinner or something. Or bowling."
Sasuke cast him a blank stare.
"Seriously, just go do something," Naruto repeated, moving towards the door. The evening air was cool, leading to him donning a grey jacket with brown fur. He wore his usual standard-issue black jounin pants and steel-toed boots with the long-sleeved button up underneath.
"Come on in," came Sakura's voice from the back of the house. "I'm sure Sasuke and Naruto have some leftovers somewhere. Just leave your shoes on that mat."
"Leftovers are in the fridge," Sasuke called on reflex.
Sakura and Ino emerged into the living area. "Hey, Naruto, Sasuke-kun," Ino waved, with a slightly awkward air of someone visiting someone else's house for the first time.
Sasuke waved without looking up from his plans. Naruto lifted one hand from strapping on a thick leather waist belt. "Yo. How's training?"
"Tough," Ino replied honestly, sweatdropping. "And it's only the first day." Sakura rounded the bar and opened the fridge, ducking down to peruse its contents.
"Don't worry, it gets easier."
"You going somewhere?" Ino asked, eyebrows furrowing.
Naruto grinned slightly. "Dinner at Kiba's place. He's my cousin."
She raised an eyebrow before she snorted and shrugged. "Yeah, I can totally see that. Somehow I'm not surprised."
"Eh, what's that supposed to mean?"
"How are you even related?" Ino asked in lieu of answering, clasping her hands behind her back and rocking back and forth on her heels as Sakura put a plate into the microwave.
"Third cousins. Our great great grandmother had kids with her husband, leading to his side of the family tree, and had an affair with a clanless shinobi that produced a daughter, leading to my side." Technically, he'd never even heard of a Namikaze clan, so he could call them clanless. He suspected they were simply a shinobi family.
He straightened the collar of his coat. "Leavin' now, Sakura. Have a good time," he called. The girl waved her fork in reply.
He stepped into the cool night air. After he'd left, Sasuke's eyes roamed up to watch Sakura lead Ino to one of the sitting rooms, nodding when the blonde sent him a goodbye.
In a moment of indecision, he set his plans down and got up, shrugging on his coat and calling a goodbye to the two females in the house.
37. The Convoluted Family Tree A/N: Naruto's family tree is about to get really convoluted. xD
The Inuzuka compound was full of housing intermingled with kennels, though he suspected many of the members slept with their ninken somewhere close by their bed. There wasn't a gate or much of a fence; none of the other clans were quite as closed off as the Uchiha had been.
As soon as he stepped onto the street near the area, he felt Kurama stiffen. No doubt he felt the dogs and their partners ahead of them on alert, though Naruto didn't know why they were.
Well, maybe it wasn't as hard to figure out as he thought. Suddenly finding the village Jinchuriki was related to one of the major clans might put some people on edge.
He felt most of the dogs in sight examining him as he headed for Kiba's house. Kurama leapt down from his shoulders to walk beside him, glaring occasionally; Naruto rolled his eyes at the mild possessiveness he exhibited. He wasn't quite a ninken, but he didn't want any other animals to be Naruto's partner, either.
The door swished open to reveal Kiba's grinning face when Naruto knocked. "Hey, buddy! How's it goin'?"
"I'm fine," Naruto replied, stumbling a little when Kiba yanked him in by his jacket and bodily patted him on the back.
"This is the place," he said, gesturing with one hand to their entryway. "Dad isn't around; Mom scared him off long time ago, so it's just me, her and Sis. I'm sure Hana'll like you."
"Er, thanks." Kurama walked in after him with a snooty tilt to his head. Naruto nudged him with his foot. "You better be good."
Maybe, Kurama sneered at him. He was still miffed he'd been interrupted during his reading; the mask he'd found was still sitting on Naruto's desk, along with the guide book retrieved from Uzushiogakure with information on various topics, including some of the masks in the storage temple and fuinjutsu. It certainly wasn't an ultimate dictionary, as Naruto suspected it had only been one of many in Uzushio's libraries, but it was still useful.
Kiba chuckled. "Bad mood?" he asked.
"Nah, he's just bein' him."
A Kiba-look-alike stepped through a doorway. "Kiba, is-" She paused, giving them the once-over. "Huh. You do look kinda alike."
"That's Hana," said Kiba. "This is Naruto."
"Hey," Naruto said, feeling a bit out of his element as he waved.
"Well, take his coat, wouldn't you?" Hana ordered, raising an eyebrow as she crossed her arms. Kiba sheepishly took Naruto's coat after he'd unbuckled his belt and hung them up. "And who's this?" she asked, kneeling down.
Kurama offered her a blank look. "This is Kurama," Naruto said. "He chooses at random whether or not he's going to behave."
"That sounds like a few ninken I know. Got any comments, foxy?"
Kurama cast her a haughty glance and retreated behind Naruto's feet. "Kurama, be polite." The fox blinked up at him with large, innocent eyes. "They know you can talk." He tilted his head. "Don't throw a hissy fit."
Hana barked out a laugh. "I would've brought my ninken, the Haimaru Brothers, in to meet you, but I thought the house would be a bit full then. Hey, Kuromaru, come meet Naruto and Kurama."
Kiba's eyebrows furrowed. Whenever someone came over to their house, Tsume and Hana let Kuromaru come around at his own pace, evaluating new people on his own time. It wasn't as if they had many guests over, but he couldn't think of any time they'd brought Tsume's ninken over right off the bat.
Except for one time, when a man with bandages over one eye and a cane had come over to the house when Kiba was small. Tsume had called her dog over to "just say hello". Kiba had been too young to remember much, but that man had creeped him out, and Tsume had sent him to his room and even let him eat dinner there.
Weird.
Tsume's partner came padding down the hall, his hulking frame somehow not taking up as much room as one would assume. The fact that he was missing one ear and wore an eyepatch to indicate he was down one eye combined with his size made him intimidating to some, though he didn't actually try to intimidate most.
"This your little cousin, Kiba?"
Naruto twitched. He was only three months younger. And two and a half inches shorter- it wasn't that much.
"Yup, this is him!" He jumped when Kiba clapped him on the shoulder, grinning. "This is Naruto and Kurama."
"Hey," Naruto offered, waving with a grin. "You're Tsume-san's ninken, right?"
"That I am. Don't let her hear you call her that, she insists-"
"I said you can call me aunt!" Tsume boomed, vaulting in through a hallway door with a ladle in her hand. "Hana, I fixed your soup."
Hana blanched. "Oh, Mom, what'd you do?" she hissed, scurrying into the kitchen past her mother.
"I told ya! I fixed it!"
"Your idea of fixing it is to add three gallons of spice!"
"It tastes better when it's spicy."
"I burnt my tongue last time! That kind of soup is for small quantities, not a whole meal!"
Naruto smiled and chuckled sheepishly. Kurama was having a staring contest with Kuromaru, both of them surveying each other with slightly narrowed eyes. "All right!" Kiba exclaimed, clapping him on the back again and coming through like a bulldozer, breaking the stare-down. "Let's go eat!"
He tugged Naruto towards the kitchen, Kuromaru's curious gaze following him all the way.
Sasuke stared at the evening thoroughfare with the air of someone who'd just stepped into a foreign jungle full of wild animals. He was more than a little lost and out of his element, and hadn't the faintest idea what he was supposed to be doing.
He didn't often take any leisure time, but when he did, he always had Naruto and Sakura with him. Most of the time, he let them decide what they wanted to do and just came along for the ride to carry the money and pay for things.
There was a million things he could be doing. He could be working on the plans for the police corps, or trying to find dirt on Danzo, or training, or working towards getting money for the Uchiha/Uzumaki union to use, or dealing with requests from the fuinjutsu agency Naruto had started freelance work for, or fixing the leaky faucet in the house next to theirs, or finding bounties to exchange, or-"He's looking a little panicked, don't you think?"
"Nah, more like twitchy. Don't worry, he gets like this."
Sasuke didn't hear them; he was still lost in his thoughts and standing in the street like a fish out of water, but even if he'd been alert he wouldn't have heard. Izuna waved a hand in front of his face and raised an eyebrow at his checked-out expression. "Yeah, he's definitely thinking about work or something."
Hashirama frowned. "He's a little young to constantly be worried about work…"
"That's just what he does. He's older than Naruto and Sakura, so I think he has a responsibility complex. I think Naruto's finances would dissolve into a puddle of goo without him. I'm eighty percent sure he's thinking about that leaky faucet in the house next to his and the stack of paperwork he has to finish that's as tall as that sign."
"It is good he has a stellar work ethic," Tobirama said, eyeing the slight dark circles under the boy's eyes, "but he should not push himself to exhaustion."
Sasuke turned and frowned at a dango shop illuminated by paper lanterns. "Hey, Sasuke," a voice called out, making four heads turn towards it, "what's up?"
Choji spoke around a mouthful of chips as he walked towards him, weaving around the occasional civilian. "I'm…" Sasuke waved his hands, frown deepening. "Supposed to be…"
Shikamaru squinted at him. "Relaxing?" he offered, slowly, as if he were speaking to a child.
"Naruto told me to. I don't know what he expects me to be doing," Sasuke scowled.
"Going out to dinner?"
"Getting sweets?"
"Watching a movie?"
"Ice skating?"
"Bowling?"
Sasuke glared at them. Shikamaru held up his hands in surrender, rolling his eyes. "What's the point of all those things?" he asked, crossing his arms to hide his discomfort. "If there's no logical benefit to be derived, why waste time at all?"
Hashirama sweatdropped. "You know, he kind of reminds me of you when you were alive," he teased his brother. "Always working. 'What's the point of doing that, brother? You're wasting time!'" Tobirama rolled his eyes at him.
"Well, I mean," Choji stammered. "They're…fun! Don't you like having fun?"
Sasuke's voice took on a note of uncertainty. "Training is fun."
"Outside of training. What do you do for fun that Naruto and Sakura don't initiate? And don't say paperwork," Shikamaru sighed.
Sasuke blanked. He stared at the duo, and they stared at him.
"Wow, Uchiha. That's sad."
Sasuke sent him a vicious glare. "At least I don't laze about for half the day watching clouds," he said, speaking through gritted teeth.
Shikamaru was silent. Choji winced.
Sasuke paused. "Apologies," he said, though he wasn't quite sure why what he'd said had struck a nerve. "That was…insensitive?"
"I've never seen an Uchiha apologize before."
"Shut the hell up, Tobirama."
"Nah, whatever," Shikamaru yawned, waving his hand. For a moment, he'd seen his friends as mere bodies in the white halls of the hospital again, and wondered for the millionth time what he could have done more if he'd trained harder. "Anyway, you look kinda pathetic just standing here. We're heading over to the barbecue. You might as well come with us."
"Oh, yeah! That place is the best," Choji said, grinning animatedly.
Sasuke restrained himself from fiddling with the end of his shirt, a skeptical look in his eyes. "Are you…sure? I am just an…acquaintance you don't know well."
Shikamaru smirked. "Oh, come on. Risked our lives for you. Do we not get friend privileges?"
"…I didn't mean it that way-"
"God, you do not know how to spot a joke."
Sasuke's mouth twisted sourly.
"Well we don't know you that well since you were all fake in the Academy," Choji continued, "but might as well get to know you now. And besides, you were in on some of those pranks on Iruka-sensei! Remember?"
"Ah. Yeah." Sasuke thought back to the time they'd covered Iruka in orange paint from head to toe, smirking at the memory of the man chasing after them whilst he screamed what punishments he'd deal them.
"Then let's go," Shikamaru said, turning to continue the lazy pace he and Choji had been making down the sidewalk. "Standing around talking is a drag."
Choji sent him another grin before taking off after his friend. Sasuke stared after them for a moment before he willed his feet to move.
Hashirama and Izuna followed them. "Hold on," Tobirama exclaimed, making both pause, "I know where I've heard Ishikawa before!" His eyes had gone slightly wider, silver eyebrows raised in surprise. Izuna cast him a curious stare.
About thirty seconds later, a loud cry of "Holy shit!" echoed through the street for no one to hear.
Many, many, many years ago…
"Come on, brother, join in the celebrations!" Hashirama said with a sunny grin, slapping Tobirama on the shoulder. There was a small, half-empty bottle in his other hand, liquid occasionally sloshing out of it when he gestured too grandly.
Tobirama eyed his brother out of the corner of his eye, repressing the urge to roll his eyes. "You're too relaxed, Hashirama," he drawled. "We only recently emerged victorious from our last battle. We should be alert at all times."
"Oh, come on." Hashirama poked his shoulder. "We're meeting in just a few days to discuss a peace agreement, and our sentinels have never failed us before."
"It is better to be cautious than to be dead."
"You could at least relax just a little," Hashirama wheedled.
He sighed. "Fine, brother."
Hashirama cheered and shoved the bottle into his hands. Not a moment later he was back into the crowd searching for his wife, more than a little tipsy.
Tobirama couldn't help the smirk that crawled its way across his face. He took a sip from the bottle, watching the shinobi gathered from his corner; the street was full of men and women celebrating their victory, some much more drunk than others. He could see a man in his own platoon dancing in a manner less reminiscent of anything that could be called graceful and more similar to an infant giraffe's awkward first steps.
He was contemplating going to find some of his calmer comrades to share a drink with (and find another bottle; as small as they were, they went fast, but they were still rather potent) when a dark shape slid out of the throng and into his space. Dark, because she still wore her battle armor.
"You don't mind if I stand over here, do you?" she asked, squinting at him. There was a scar running down her face, disfiguring part of her lip.
He shook his head. She planted herself several feet away from him, giving him his personal space, and they lapsed into silence.
She had just guzzled down the last of her own spirits when she retrieved two more from somewhere on her person, tossing one to him. "If you ask me, the lightweights 'round here shouldn't get drunk so quick. Could still get mauled by the enemy."
He snorted. Faintly, he wondered how much she'd had to drink; she didn't sway at all, and she showed no obvious signs of intoxication, yet she had already gone through another sake bottle.
"Hey, aren't you the Senju clan head's younger brother?"
"Senju Tobirama."
"Remember you from the battlefield yesterday."
Now that he examined her more closely, he recognized her as well; the almost impossibly bright blonde hair was a dead giveaway. He remembered vividly she wielded a large scythe on the battlefield, slicing through enemies and leaving them either dead or crippled. Merciless and efficient.
"Our platoons raided the southern camp together," he said, nodding to himself. "You're not Leaf, are you?"
"Nah. Just helping out an ally. Be heading back to my county tomorrow. Rest of the squad wanted to head back tonight, but I said what the hell, might as well stick around one day more. With the way those nin ran off with their tails between their legs, I'd say we have at least a seventy-percent chance of a peaceful night. Seventy's better than nothin' nowadays."
"True," he conceded, taking a swig of his bottle. He was feeling more relaxed himself, mustering a smirk when he saw Hashirama animatedly introducing a stoic but still embarrassed Mito as "my lovely, lovely, lovely wife!"
They both looked up and watched in silence as a group of shinobi started up a drunken game of "Who can drink the most?" A young twenty-something Tobirama recognized but couldn't remember the name of was the first to break, toppling off the table someone had gotten from a shop and dragged into the street. A woman who couldn't have been more than eighteen came out the winner, waving her empty bottle above her head and letting out a long hoot.
The woman beside him snorted. "Lightweights," she snickered, before taking out another bottle. "Here. This's the strong stuff."
Considering what they were drinking was already 'strong', she must have been either exaggerating or he was about to be a hypocrite with his "We should be alert at all times."
Around thirteen minutes later, he proved the second notion true.
"And then," the woman chortled, the scar on her eyebrow quivering, "then, he just said 'But the power of love can do it too!'"
She was referring to Hashirama, who'd taken in much more alcohol than he should've and was, by now, a slurring mess Mito was dragging off towards their house. The woman had gone over to the supply of alcohol to swipe some more and overheard the conversation he'd been having, although she had no idea what the hell it had been about.
Tobirama shook his head, amused. "My brother is too naïve at times," he said.
"Yeah, but sometimes, it's, refreshing. Or something like that. But in controlled doses only. I swear, my younger brother is like that all the time; it's annoying as hell. I left him at home just so I wouldn't have to deal with him." This garnered a snort from her companion. "The power of love, honestly. You're lucky to find someone you love you won't have to kill later or have die on ya the next day."
She squinted into the dark and watched a young couple duck into the shadows. "Someone's getting some tonight."
He rolled his eyes. "Let them have their fun. As you said, they could die tomorrow."
"Oh, true, true. I was going to find someone to share a bed with, but I find the majority of people annoying as crap, so I ix-nayed that plan." She cast him a teasing grin, shaking her sake bottle at him. "Unless you wanted to have a little liaison."
He blinked in surprise. He was the last person expected to get a proposition. "Excuse me?"
"Seriously? God, here I thought you were one of the intelligent ones. Okay, liaison means-"
"I know what the word means," he snapped, eyebrow twitching in annoyance.
She stared blankly at him for a moment before guffawing. "Never mind, this is funny."
"Oh, for the love of-"
She dropped her empty bottle onto the stack behind her. She had quite a collection going.
He moved out of the way of a passing shinobi, swaying lightly on his feet. Smart enough to recognize the need for a support, he placed himself a few feet back against a store's wall, trying to look as if he were simply moving out of a preferred displacement.
She cackled. "Can't stand?"
He eyed her with a glare. She stumbled over to him and thudded against the wall, waving. "Your eyes are pretty intimidating and all, but somehow the effect is muddled when you're drunk."
"I'm not-" He blinked several times to dispel a bout of dizziness. "Fine. I'm slightly drunk."
"Only slightly?" she snickered.
"You're more drunk than I am."
"How are we supposed to tell who's drunker? Have a drunk competition? Okay, here we go: whoever gets to the roof last is drunkest."
He eyed the roof. It was a testament to how intoxicated he was that he was actually considering such a childish competition.
"I would rather stay on the ground, thank you."
She shrugged. "Your loss." She kicked a stray pebble, obviously bored.
The cheering of the crowd had started to become progressively louder. Tobirama winced slightly, deciding to ignore the hazy firelight that had started to hurt his eyes.
"I'm gonna ditch this joint. They're loud as fuck," the woman said bluntly, tossing her latest sake bottle and turning to sway down the back alley they stood beside. "If you want to have that liaison, feel free to come with," she called lazily over her shoulder.
Tobirama squinted after her, unable to deny some part of him felt curious.
No one noticed the Senju leader's brother disappearing into an alley.
Tobirama's head was pounding when he awoke. He groped for his pillow and shoved it over his eyes, groaning; the sunlight streaming in through his window made his skull throb more.
His thoughts and memories were muddled; he remembered very vaguely something about Hashirama and the power of love, and a blonde kunoichi he'd, for some reason, had a ninjutsu battle and then a (very, very messy- almost embarrassingly bad due to their drunkenness) taijutsu brawl with before they somehow made it back to his home.
Slowly, he emerged from his pillow, rubbing his forehead. His hand came down on something made of paper; the crinkling caught his attention, and he retrieved a note from the other side of the bed.
Hey Senju,
Had to leave early this morning. Sorry I'm not around to make fun of your hangover personally. I bet your skull's stinging like a bitch. Anyway, thanks for the drunken escapades. You weren't lying about that thing you could do with your teeth.
-Ishikawa Mai
That thing I can do with my teeth? Tobirama thought, utterly confused. After a few moments, he shook his head, tossing the note into his wastebasket and dragging himself out of bed to prepare for a day of strained negotiations and paperwork.
Nine months later:
A young man winced, listening to the sounds of his sister from several tents down. Her screaming had reached a crescendo, but he and the other medics had a feeling it was only partially due to pain, and partially due to pure, raw, unadulterated rage.
"Fucking Senju!" Ishikawa Mai howled. "I'm blaming you, you bastard! I fucking hate you!'
The sound of a baby's cry interrupted the screaming. "Well," the young man ventured, "she broke the clan's record for 'fastest birth ever'."
Many years later…
"And then, then she doesn't even, doesn't even TELL ME who my frikkin' father is," Mai hiccupped, "and she gives me a girl's name! 'I'll name you after me. I'm all you need.' He's probably some clanless bastard child."
"Probably," sighed the woman- Umeki or something- next to him. "Be glad he isn't around. He's probably a jerk anyway."
"What, is yours?'
"I'm just a disappointment," she sneered. "Couldn't get the friggin' Mokuton himself so he was coun- countin' on me, but noooo. I just don't have the gift. Everyone's always been lookin, lookin' for Grandpa Hashirama's bloodline, but not any of us have it, not me, not m'dad, not m'dad's sis, and not her kids either. Stupid cousin Tsunade. Couldn't have just gotten it and taken the pressure off me. You know what's really f- fu- fuc- ugh, whatever that word is, what's really annoying? When your," she paused to take a swig of her drink, "when your husband doesn't even let you name your baby what you want. I wanted to name my daughter Minata, but did I get to? Noooooo. It has to be a GOOD NAME."
"If I ever have a kid, I'll name him somethin' strong," Mai said wistfully. "Like Goro."
"See? Goro's a good name."
"And his child will be Masato," Mai continued, as if he hadn't heard her. "A name that's been in the family for generations. But my great grandkid'll be Minata, if it's a girl, and Minato, if it's a boy, for you. Screw stubborn family."
She smiled goofily. "Can he name his kid after noodles?" she giggled. "I like noodles."
"Yeah, sure, whatever."
"I didn't even wanna marry him," she continued, as if she hadn't heard him. "I wanted to marry an Uchiha, but noooo, can't marry an Uchiha, they're all EVIL. So I married a Senju, but look how shitty that turned out."
"Sucks for you," he said, not unsympathetically, and tapped his shot glass against hers in a show of solidarity.
She turned to him with a leer, looking him up and down. "Say," she said thoughtfully, a glint in her eye, "why don't we both relax?"
"Relax?" he asked, befuddled. They were both as relaxed as they could get, holed up in a bar in the middle of Fire Country.
"Yeah. Relax."
"Oh," he said in realization. "But what about your husba-"
"Forget my husband," she said, grabbing him by the collar and yanking him towards her.
Around nine months later, when she bore a blond-haired child to a family full of brunettes and black-haired shinobi, she would send the child off to its father to avoid her husband's ire.
Many years later…
Ishikawa Goro wondered at the feeling of déjà vu he was feeling as he surveyed the Inuzuka woman he saw flouncing about the bar with her friends. Her canines weren't as sharp and her nails not nearly as claw-like as a full Inuzuka, and he suspected she wasn't a full Inuzuka herself- there was probably a scandal somewhere there- but she held the attractive wild quality of one anyway. The purple markings on her face made her eyes pop, and when she turned to meet his eyes across the bar, he thought even a man with a face like his could find a warm bed.
For some reason, he felt like what he was contemplating ran in the family.
"I wanted my mom's name," Senju Odama complained, "Umeki's a cute name. But Dad wanted one like his. A STRONG name. Pssh."
Namikaze Masato nodded sympathetically. "I don't even know my real parents," he said, brushing a hand through vibrant blond hair. "I was given up for adoption at an early age. Got my surname from my grandfather. But my adopted parents are kind people. Apparently my biological ones were quite adamant about me naming my child either Minato or Minata."
For some reason, he felt there was some sort of scandal attached to that.
She turned and looked him up and down. They looked nothing alike, and he was older than her, so it never occurred to either one that they were related. As it was, if she'd known he was, technically, her illegitimate nephew, she would never have considered what she was, but they were both oblivious. Many from the same family married in the early Warring States Period, and even if the practice had been abolished, it sometimes still happened with no one knowing about it; that is, accidentally.
"Say, want to go get some dango?"
He smiled. "Thought you'd never ask."
For some reason, she felt there was some sort of odd scandal following her around.
Somewhere, tied up in the void between the afterlife and the chakra she'd sealed in her son, Uzumaki Kushina was suddenly assaulted with the feeling that her side of the family was a lot less messed up than her husband's.
Which was weird, since he was, to their knowledge, an orphan, but her feelings were always right.