I swear the one time I'm not starting shit, someone else does it for me.

Here I am, getting ready to eat lunch with Uraraka and Iida like a normal boy should for once, when all the sudden, All Might peers from around the corner.

This is already going to be bad.

All Might gives up a bright smile, "Hello! Young Midoriya! I have something to talk about with you!" All the sudden, this man lifts up a meal the size of his palm, "Would you like to eat lunch with me?"

Logically, I ask, "Depends: Do you have food there already?"

Iida obviously doesn't understand me still as he chops the air, "You can't just ask ask, Midoriya-kun!"

All Might just smiles, ignoring the hypercritical boy, "Of course!"

I clap, "I'm in! See ya'll after!" I wave to Uraraka and Iida, ignoring their shocked expressions as All Might takes me to the teacher's lounge. He drags me to a corner away from the teachers where I see a sexy bowl of katsudon for me.

"I love you," I say without hesitation as I sit down.

All Might takes a seat across from me, laughing loudly, "You have some interesting standards, my boy."

"Food is food, and I'm hungry. Also, could you be any more obvious? You don't want people to pick up on our connection unless you're in the mood for a kidnapping," I state before I forget. I start to eat, listening to All Might as he eats his too simplistic of a meal, though I guess that's bound to happen when you're missing a goddamn stomach.

"People are more oblivious than you realize, young Midoriya. Well, the students anyway. Some of the teachers already know that I trained you before this, but that's it. I'm not too worried about them. I appreciate the concern."

I huff, "Couldn't help to be more careful. Anyway, I know you didn't come here to just chat so what's the tea."

All Might clears his throat, "As you are aware, the Sports Festival is coming up. This is the time to make your mark, my boy. This is the time to show who you are!"

"By breaking all my limbs plus my spine and skull?!"

"Yes- I mean, no! That's not what I mean! I rather you avoid injuring yourself all together." However, I get way too excited for what just came out of my mouth.

"Wait, can I use that quirk on my skull?"

"Young Midoriya, I don't think this is something to consider-"

"Or my dick? Oh, oh, or can I use it on my mouth to blow a tornado?!"

"Midoriya! Language!"

I cough, gaining my composer for less then a second, "Oops, I did it again- I played with your heart! Got lost in the game! Ooh, baby baby!" I ended up turning English to saying that.

All Might chuckles aloud, "You seem more hyper than usual!"

"I'm sorry, but that was necessary for my soul. You may continue."

"Yes. What I mean by that is to show who you are as a person. Not with your quirk. Show your smile and what you can provide the next generation!"

I choke, "Sir, you're the same person who told me I couldn't be a hero because I was quirkless. Don't pull that shit out of your ass now, mister!"

All Might sighs, and this is the only time I can get him to sigh: whenever we are having these conversations about quirks, "I know, I know."

"And Endeavor makes it fine in the hero world as an asshole."

"Language. And that's why he isn't a symbol or the number one hero."

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Vlad King, the homeroom teacher of the other hero class, 1-B, glares at me. I shut the fuck up while glaring at him.

All Might turns my attention away from him, "My boy, you're aiming to be a symbol. You have to show some kindness. Otherwise, with a personality like yours, you will be severely limited on what you can do to help. I'm not saying to change yourself completely. If anything, your...unpredictability...will save you. However, you do have to limit yourself a little bit. Do you understand?"

I click my tongue, "I can work with that." I finish my food, leaning back.

"I know you can, because we go beyond!"

"To infinity!"

"...what?"

"I thought we were reversing Buzz Lightyear's quote."

"I was doing the UA quote, young Midoriya. I don't even know Buzz Lightyear?"

"That's your problem, not mine."

All Might checks the time, "You should probably start heading to class. Lunch is about to end soon."

I stand up, fixing my uniform, "Gotcha, dumbass."

"Remember what I said, my boy!"

"Please: I remember shit I don't want to remember from you. I'll remember this."

With that, I make my way back to the squad.

Day of Sports Festival - Before The Show Starts

If there is one thing I give myself full credit for, it's my ability to hype people up.

Ignoring Iida's blubbering, I hop on the table and holler,

"DO 1-B RUN THIS MOTHER F-?!"

Kaminari and Ashido, my new best friends, immediately reply, "HELL NAW!" The level of support here is going to make me cry.

"DO 1-B RUN THIS MOTHER F-?!"

This time, Sero, Uraraka, Kirishima, and Hagakure join, "HELL NAW!"

"DO GENERAL COURSE RUN THIS MOTHER F-?!"

The more shy students sneak in, "HELL NAW!"

"DO SUPPORT RUN THIS MOTHER F-?!"

At this point, I have everyone but Todoroki, Yaoyorozu, Kacchan, Iida, and Tokoyami, "HELL NAW!"

"DO BUSINESS RUN THIS MOTHER F-?!"

"HELL NAW!"

"DO 1-A RUN THIS MOTHER F-?!"

"HELL YEAH!"

"DO THIS CLASS RUN THIS MOTHER F-?!"

"HELL YEAH!"

"DO 1-A RUN THIS MOTHER F-?!"

"HELL YEAH!"

"DO THIS CLASS- HEY, LET ME GO!" As I am finishing my beautiful speech, I'm suddenly wrapped up and pulled next to fricking Aizawa! LIKE, I'M DOING SOMETHING GOOD FOR ONCE!

Wait, is he using his bandages to tie me up? That can't be healthy. I will get Recovery Girl on your case, Aizawa!

That's irrelevant at the moment, though.

Just like that, the class goes silent. I think it's because Aizawa is glaring at them, but I never understood that. They don't know true pain until they go his detention.

Every.

Single.

Day.

That's TRUE pain. However, if they want to be pansies, that's their problem, not mine.'

There is complete silence for a minute until Aizawa asks, "Want to explain yourself, problem child?"

At this point, I have decided that it's impossible for me to get expelled from this school for some reason. I just get detention where I want to yeetus deletus myself afterwards, so my standards for this school has dropped.

That's what prompts me to look at Satan with so much enthusiasm, "I was hyping up the class, and I'm proud to say that it works!"

Aizawa looks amongst the sea of children and sighs, "Why shouldn't I give you detention?"

"I never said the f-word and hell is a place. Besides, that means you must spend more time with me." Aizawa considers it.

"You owe me a five page essay on why heroes shouldn't curse in public. Now, as I was going to say before you all-"

"What about All Might?" Yes, I'm throwing him under the bus.

"...what about All Might?"

"He curses in public all the time, but it's in English so most people can't understand him."

"You're still stuck with this project, and don't interrupt me," Aizawa takes a quick breather, "Today is an important day for all of you. Through this event, you will be demonstrating your abilities to heroes to get offers for internships. Don't slack on these or cause trouble. Good luck." At the trouble comment, he glares at me.

I don't know what he's expecting me to do. Blow up the place? I wish I had the mental capabilities to do that!

Aizawa unties me and leaves.

Welp. That ruined the moment.

Whatever. Somebody in 1-A is going to win anyway.

Likely not me, but somebody will! I'm just going to be salty if Kacchan wins because he rude.

NOW LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

"YOU HAVE PROBABLY HEARD OF THIS CLASS ALL OVER THE NEWS AS THEY TOOK PART IN THE VILLAIN ATTACK, IT'S HERO CLASS 1-A!"

Damn, way to hype us up, Present Mic!

As my class and I step out on the field, I look up to the sound booth where he sits only to see fucking Aizawa in there with him! What had to have happened to convince Satan to be in there with him?!

Thinking about it, I don't want to know. If Present Mic is involved, it's going to be something ridiculous.

I know this from personal experience!

We stand in our section as the other classes come out, Present Mic just calling them out like dogs. I shouldn't support this, but I do!

We turn to center stage to see Midnight smacking her whip against the boards, "Welcome to the first year Sports Festival, and I am your host: Midnight!"

Midnight, the +18 hero, is in charge of the first years who are about 15 years old? Well, this is going to be entertaining!

Rephrase, it already is because you can see so many people blushing and questioning UA's decisions! Took them long enough to question them!

Midnight smacks her whip again to get attention, "Before we start, we must have our student speech! This is based on who made first place in the hero course entry exam!" No, it can't be, "Please welcome Bakugo Katsuki to the stage!"

We're gonna die. Look, people already hate us. We had people crowding the classroom the other day because they wanted to check us out, and Kacchan fucked it up there. HE'S GOING TO PRACTICALLY ENCOURAGE THEM!

Kacchan slugs to the stage, attempting to look like a badass he is not.

When he gets on stage, he leans into the mic and says, in the most casual voice possible, "I'm going to win." And walks off.

That's it. Nothing else.

BUT BOY DID IT RILE THEM UP!

I get what Kacchan was going for: he wanted a challenge. However, he obviously forgot about us(most likely didn't care), so they will be attacking 1-A now!

That makes the show more entertaining I guess.

Midnight purrs, "OH, WHAT A YOUTHFUL CHALLANGE! Without further ado, let's see what the first challenge is!" She spins this unnecessary wheel (as they probably have it set up already), and it lands on, "your first challenge is an obstacle course!"

I would let her explain this, but I won't. Basically, it's a one mile race with three obstacles we have to avoid. We can't go outside the fences or attack people unless we want to get disqualified.

Other than that, it's free game.

Midnight asks everyone to line up at the gate, and I'm quick to realize the problem: that's a small ass gate. It will be a frat party because everyone is going to be shoved in there like salmon.

I don't feel like going through that. It's a good thing I have a VERY loose plan for this show!

SO, for some dumb reason, every class can use support items except hero students unless there is permission. As someone with a quirk that breaks bones like chopsticks, this is dumb. It focuses purely on quirks when it shouldn't. Support items should be an important, if not THE most important thing to show here.

Think about it: Sure, your top heroes like All Might and Endickvor don't use it, but most heroes do. Midnight has a whip. Present Mic has a directional speaker. Aizawa has the bondage- I mean the scarf.

Overall, hero students are thrown in the dumps where they don't need to be.

What does this have to do with my plan?

Well, I may not be able to use the shit that comes out of my ass as a support item, but support students can use them and have way better.

I'm going to attempt to pair up with a support student. The idea is that we support each other to make it to the finals because nothing says teamwork, and the second challenge is always something to do with teamwork!

It's like a quick date! We get used to each other in the first round and kick ass in the second!

I mean, I will need to work with a support student anyway. I might as well start on it now!

Now, you may be asking: Izuku, why in the fuck would anyone want to pair with you?

It's simple, my friend! Since I'm in class 1-A, which will receive a lot of attention, I'm offering to share my attention with them! They have to get companies attention anyway, so what better way to do it then with 1-A? I also can offer a piggy back ride since I can run pretty fast with a person on my back due to Aizawa. I'm pretty sure I can outrun most of 1-A with someone on my back with how much he kills me over it.

It doesn't help that he falls asleep in the middle of it, so I have to completely support him at one point. It sucks, but now I can use it here!

Time to actually find that person within five minutes!

I have a confession to make: I may or may not have been stalking the support students during my 'free time.'

Freetime meaning I sing an English song from a musical to Present Mic in order to get out of his class for free. Obviously, Iida doesn't approve it, but this is a free teaching style so it works us! The only reason I get away with it is because I actually know musicals. Nobody else in my class does. There are advantages for being interested in the wrong things!

Just don't ask how I am currently passing the class, though. My English generally sucks except in singing.

Anyway, my target is Hatsume Mei! She passes the vibe check and building good shit check as long as you ignore the daily explosions!

Bah, who am I kidding?! We support the explosions too!

We just have to find her.

I have to jump to catch a lick of light pink that looks similar to hers. I run to the person and bless my heart that it's her!

Alright, Izuku, breathe- wait, who am I kidding? She's as wacky in the head as me! We'll get along great!

I approach her with as much fake confidence I can muster, "Hey, hey! Are you a support student?"

Hatsume was working on something, so when she heard me, she immediately turned and had a huge smile on her face, "I am! I'm Hatsume Mei! Are you interested in my babies?" I'm glad I stalked her before this. Otherwise, I would be so lost.

Though, I have to pretend, "You're inventions, right?"

"Uh-huh! I plan on going to the finals to show them off to get attention! Are you part of a company?!" As Hatsume is telling me this she gets way too close to my face. Overall, she looks like an average girl with pink pigtails. The only thing that stands out are her bright yellow eyes that work in part with her quirk. I can only assume that the quirk has something to do with her eyesight. I haven't stalked her enough to get that info.

"Damn, I wish. However, I have a deal for you that can get you more attention!"

At this point, Hatsume dramatically grabs my shirt, "I'm more than willing to hear, greenie!" Greenie? Whatever. At least it is accurate.

"I'm in class 1-A. You should be aware by now of how much media presence we have. I will tell you straight-up that my quirk is a bitch and a half to control, so I can't use it here nor can I have support items without permission. However, I do have the strength to carry you whenever and fight. For you, you will use your support items to, well, support us. It will get us attention if two students are working together for the first rounds. Don't worry: it's perfectly legal! OH, and I have info on 1-A I'm willing to share."

"I'M IN!"

"Alright, what are the things that you got that you can use?"

"Since the regulation is so boring, I can only use my hover boots!" That's incredibly useful if it works as well as I think it does. I just need to know the limitations.

"How high can you hover? Does it hover in one place or can you move around? If you can move around, how fast? How much weight can it carry? How much time does it need before it starts running?" Don't ask this many questions to a normal person. Good thing Hatsume isn't normal!

"100 meters (328.1 feet), it does move around at about how fast a normal person can run, it can carry a ton of weight, and a second to start running!"

"...bitch, that's not an only thing. That's OP. When you say normal person, you mean like an office worker who doesn't exercise right?" Look, that's where standards have gone these days.

"Of course!"

"Would you be able to carry me while using the hoverboots?"

"You would probably hang off of me, but otherwise, yes!"

"Close enough. Are you willing to do it for an idea I have?"

"As long as I get to the next round with more attention, I don't care!"

"Alright, so here's the plan-"

"GET READY, LITTLE LISTENERS!" Present Mic yells from his booth. Well, fuck.

"Okay, where do you want me to grab you? We're improvising this shit."

"SOUNDS LIKE FUN! Around my neck will be fine! I just need to make sure you have a firm grip before I start flying." RIP her neck.

"GET SET!" For once, shut up, Mic.

I quickly grip around Hatsume's neck, and I must say I feel guilty for doing this,"If I say potato, you're good to fly. I'll tell you what to do from there. And potato."

"Got it, greenie!"

"AND GO!" Present Mic voice booms in the arena.

Despite literally talking for less then five minutes, I feel a connection with Hatsume when she immediately starts flying. Mainly because I'm basically trusting my life in hers.

I was right about the frat party thing. That shit is more crowded then I thought!

Hatsume starts flying over everybody, "Oh, I see! I didn't think this would be one! You're smart, greenie!"

"I'm actually really dumb."

Even though we are in a goddamn tunnel, we can still hear Present Mic clearly, "THE SECRET FIRST OBSTACLE: THE TUNNEL OF DOOM! DUE TO HOW SMALL IT IS, STUDENTS TEND TO CROWD AT THE DOORWAY AND STRUGGLE TO GET OUT!"

Well, good thing we realized this problem, huh?

Suddenly, the whole place drops to freezing. That sparks outrage in the crowd below us, and I notice that they are trapped in ice.

Present Mic commentates, "WOW! THE CONTESETANTS MUST HAVE GOTTEN COLD FEET BEFORE THE END FROM TODOROKI SHOTO!" Shush.

I just let myself blabber because I think she'll get it,"Huh. I guess that doesn't count as attacking? Todoroki, half-hot half-cold. Honestly, one of the strongest people in my class. We just have to be careful with the ice. If he's pulling shots like these, who knows what he's going to pull next."

"That's crazy powerful! Oh, we're approaching the end!"

"I'm going to drop and run ahead before you come close to landing. I need you to grab on me like a koala and hold on tight."

"Reduces switching time if we just landed. Got it!"

Now to actually put that bitch in action.

We get to the end, and I sacrifice myself by letting go of her neck and dropping to the ground safely. I'm thanking above that's something I learned from hero class because everything else is kind of irrelevant when you punch kids in the face on the daily. I run ahead, but not by much because I don't want to leave Hatsume behind.

As soon as I feel the weight on my back, I go full speed!

"IT LOOKS LIKE CLASS 1-A IS GETTING OUT OF THE ICE WITHOUT A PROBLEM!" Now that Mic mentions it, I do notice my other classmates. Somehow, I'm outrunning the slower ones.

Surprising me because I thought he just fell asleep in there, Aizawa speaks up, "This class went through a villain attack where they had to fight for their lives. They learned that they can't waste time and to think creatively."

"TRUE THAT, AIZAWA! WAIT, ZOOM IN ON MIDORIYA! DOES HE HAVE A GIRL ON HIS BACK?!"

"He combined his abilities with the girl's. She was able to fly him over the crowd, and he can carry her quickly."

You can hear papers shuffling, "MIDORIYA IZUKU FROM 1-A HAS COMBINED FORCES WITH HATSUME MEI IN THE SUPPORT COURSE TO MAKE IT THROUGH THE FIRST COURSE! WILL IT BE ENOUGH?! WE'LL CHECK IN ON THEM LATER! RIGHT NOW, TODOROKI SHOTO IS IN FIRST PLACE WITH BAKUGO KATSUKI A LITTLE BEHIND HIM! THEY HAVE BOTH ARRIVED AT THE 1ST OBSTACLE: THE ROBOTS! CONTESTANTS RECOGNIZE THESE FROM THEIR ENTRANCE EXAMS! HOWEVER, THEY ARE MUCH BIGGER THAN BEFORE, SO IT'S NOT RECOMMENDED TO DESTROY THEM!"

Bitch, yes it will be enough.

I continue zooming, and I see the huge-ass robots that Present Mic is talking about. However, they are frozen in place. However, that's not what worries me. What worries me is the position they are frozen in.

They are unstable AF, and those bitches will crash soon.

I click my tongue, "So I'm waiting for those to crash so we can maybe steal some shit from it. While we're waiting, what's your quirk?"

I feel Hatsume tighten her grip, "Zoom! I can zoom up to five kilometers to see!"

"Wait, so can you look past the robots and see what is next?"

"Uh-huh! It looks like a pitfall and bumps on the ground! Probably bombs!"

"Oh great!"

As previously predicted, the robots start to collapse. The unlucky fuckers that decided to run get trapped under it, and I can only hope they aren't dead!

THEIR PROBLEM, NOT MINE!

I run past the big robots, and I have to focus on dodging the little robots.

Present Mic's voice starts to boom once again, "TODOROKI SHOTO HAS FROZEN THE BOTS IN UNSTABLE POSITIONS, CAUSING THEM TO CRASH DOWN-"

As Present Mic is speaking, however, we can hear a door suddenly slam open in their studio, "AIZAWA, GET YOUR PSYCHO KID AWAY FROM MY PSYCHO KID!" Wait, what? What's going on?

Hatsume informs me, "Hey, that's Powerloader-sensei!" I hum in response, picking up a random piece of scrap metal because shiny.

Aizawa grumbles, "Who are you talking about?"

Powerloader fucking screams, "GET MIDORIYA AWAY FROM HATSUME! THOSE TWO WILL DESTROY THIS PLACE!"

Aizawa sighs, and, in the most bored voice possible, says, "Midoriya, please get away from Hatsume, " I look towards the nearest camera and mouth no, "You heard the kid. He says no. Besides, he ain't mine." Good because I don't want to be yours. I would like to mention that during this entire exchange, you can hear Present Mic laughing in the background.

"HE WILL BE YOUR PROBLEM ONCE THOSE TWO ACTUALLY START! I HEARD THE STORIES ABOUT THAT BOY! HOW DID THOSE TWO EVEN MEET?!"

"With Midoriya, this is probably his first time meeting her."

"...I'm retiring." I wasn't aware of how much trauma I have caused the staff until now. If a support teacher knows me, then I must be pretty well-known!

Present Mic finally clears his voice, "May I continue with the program?" All you can hear is the door being slammed shut now, "SORRY FOR THE DISRUPTION! ANYWAY, BAKUGO KATSUKI HAS JUST TAKEN FIRST PLACE AND HAS ARRIVED AT THE SECOND OBSTACLE: THE PITFALL OF DOOM! STUDENTS MUST CRAWL OVER SOMEHOW WITHOUT FALLING OVER! DISCLAIMER: THIS IS COMPLETELY SAFE AND THERE ARE BLOW UPS AT THE BOTTOM OF IT TO SAVE THE FALLING STUDENTS!"

Boring!

The plan escapes my mouth before I can consider if it's good or not, "We need to go back to how we did it at the beginning, Hatsume."

"Gotcha, greenie!"

When we approach the 'death fall' pit, I have to cling to Hatsume again with the shiny that my dumbass won't sacrifice. This time, we have to land, run, and fly again to get across. At least it's a better method than most others.

"WE ARE AT THE FINAL OBSTACLE: THE MINEFIELD! MINES ARE SCATTERED ACROSS THE TRACK, AND WHEN STEPPED ON, THRUSTS THE PERSON INTO THE AIR! YOU EITHER TAKE IT SLOW AND BE CAREFUL AND GO FAST AND TAKE THE RISK!"

Sounds like shit, Present Mic. Dramatics, I guess.

Hatsume and I finally finish our torture and approach the minefield.

I look at her because I assume she is smart in this shit, "Is there a specific amount of pressure that can be pushed before exploding or is it any amount?"

Hatsume picks up a rock and throws it at a mine on the side. It doesn't explode, "Certain amount of pressure!"

A plan immediately comes to mind, but I look at my shiny with disappointment. For those curious, it's the side paneling off the robot with wire still attached. I could sell this for a lot by just saying it's from UA!

With a sigh of sadness, I get to work VERY CAREFULLY digging up the mines and shoving them in one pile.

Hatsume seems to realize what I'm doing because she smiles like she is about to win a million dollars.

"I'm going to run forward and jump on the shiny while landing on the mines. I need you to cling onto me and hope we don't die."

"This is going to be so much fun!" Glad one of us is into this.

TIME TO THROW MY LIFE OUT THE WINDOW POSSIBLY!

Holding the shiny like a dougy board, I dash at a pile a fucking landminds, jumping on the shiny, and landing on the landminds. I don't even feel Hatsume getting on my back from the adrenaline alone.

The next thing we know, we're fucking flying across the field into our possible death sentence!

Actually, that wouldn't be the worst thing to happen. That would make for an interesting gravestone. I wonder if my grave would be next to Hatsume's?

I should be moving on, huh?

"MIDORIYA AND HATSUME HAVE TAKEN A LEAP OF FAITH AND ARE NOW BLASTING ACROSS THE MINEFIELD LIKE IT'S MORE IRRELEVANT THAN LOGAN PAUL! HOWEVER, WILL THEY SURPASS TODOROKI AND BAKUGO?!" Honestly, I felt that, Mic.

Speaking of Todoroki and Bakugo, we are approaching them now! The problem is that we are starting to crash down before the mines end. That's not a good thing for us if we want to win. Thankfully, I have a solution as we fly through Todoroki and Bakugo!

I pull the shiny from under us for a moment by the wire when we near the ground and slam it down to trigger the mines. Then, I get us right back on it and fly again, though not as far.

Of course, we're going to ignore the part I yell 'suck it, losers' at Bakugo and Todoroki.

When we near the ground for permanent landing, Hatsume yells, "Go ahead without me! Get first place, greenie!"

"Gotcha!" I ain't going to deny an order like that.

I feel the weight disappear off my back, and I release the shiny and land on my feet. As much as I would love to recover, I have to fucking run.

GOTTA GO ZOOM, BITCHES!

I hear ice and explosions cackling, but I pushing through the finish line first.

"UNBELIEVABLE! MIDORIYA IZUKU HAS COME IN FIRST WITH THE POWER OF TEAMWORK WITH HATSUME MEI FOLLOWING IN FOURTH PLACE! TODOROKI SHOTO GETS SECOND AND BAKUGO KATSUKI GETS THIRD!" Mic announces.

I WON, BITCHES!

Hatsume tackles me into a hug, "AMAZING JOB, GREENIE! THAT SHOULD GET PLENTY OF ATTENTION FOR MY BABIES!"

"I hope so!"

We wait on the side until everybody else finishes. Though, I will admit that I'm depressed that my phone got taken away before this so I can't play Mario Kart for the meantime.